Was it death that Jimin was so scared of? Or was it the uncertainty of life? He himself wasn't sure. 

The moment he was aware that he was conscious, he felt a slight pressure in front of his eyes and around his head and the heart monitoring machine was beeping a steady pace. Jimin was bothered by the oxygen mask. He pulled his hand to shove the annoying thing off of his face when a hand stopped him.

"It'll help you breathe. The anesthetic drugs is still in your system." A low voice whom he was sure belonged to Taehyung, spoke. His voice wasn't as merry as it used to be and his best friend's hand was cold as ice.

"Wow you sound awful. Can't imagine how bad you look like right now." Jimin joked, trying to lighten the atmosphere.

"You'll be surprised. People tell me I look pretty good." The latter replied. Jimin was sure he heard Taehyung sighed afterwards.

"What happened?"

"Nah. I'm just tired. I haven't slept in two days. I'm a resident. I have no life." Taehyung answered as he sighed, yet again.

Jimin let out a small chuckle as he propelled himself forward, trying to sit. Taehyung helped him as the young doctor placed pillows on Jimin's back to support him.

"Did Yoongi hyung visit? Where's the others? Are they asleep?" Jimin asked.

Taehyung scrunched up his face, bringing up his right hand to massage his temples as he balled up his left fist, turning his knuckles white.

"He, he haven't gotten the chance to visit you."  He can't. 

Those words almost escaped Taehyung's lips but he doesn't have the courage to tell Jimin. His friend looked so happy. He was smiling despite the possible headache and pain from the operation. He was so happy, so full of hope. And who was Taehyung to crush them just like that?

"Aw, they told me they'll be here when I wake up." Jimin said as he faked a pout and Taehyung can't help but to divert his eyes, feeling guilty.

As if on cue, Taehyung felt vibrations from his pager, demanding his presence in the emergency room.

"Look Chim, duty calls." Taehyung said as he waved his pager in front of Jimin's face, fully aware that the latter can't see just yet. "My mom or the other nurses will visit soon. Get some rest and don't strain yourself. I'll be back later."

"Okie dokey." Jimin said as he flashed Taehyung a huge toothy smile. "Do your best. Kim Taehyung, fighting!" Jimin cheered.

Taehyung returned the favor with a small smile as he left the room.

He took a deep breath as he opened a bottle of energy drink from his white coat and gulped it down in one go.

Jungkook didn't know what sort of sin did he commit on his past life. There he was, sitting beside his dead looking brother on the Intensive Care Unit during summer break.  

Yoongi was hooked on so many machines and Jungkook thought that no one should be connected to that many machines just to live, or in Yoongi's case, just to breathe. 

How ironic would it be? He was so worried that Yoongi would die from his disease but no, he died from a fall instead. 

Taehyung's diagnosis was spot on. There was a massive bleeding inside Yoongi's head and the doctors have to drill a hole in his skull to lessen the pressure in his brain, but it seemed like time was not on his side. 

It took approximately 20 minutes to drive from their apartment to the hospital and the longer it was, the smaller chance of survival Yoongi has. 

His one and only family member was declared brain dead yesterday. They gave him two choices. To wait for a miracle to happen or to plug out his life support. 

No matter how long it would take, Jungkook will wait. He was pretty sure of it. 

"Kook, eat something." Seokjin said as the elder ruffled his hair tenderly. 

"I'll eat when I'm hungry, hyung." 

"Let's take turns. You've been here for two days, sleeping on that ugly chair. I bet your back is aching like crazy right now." Namjoon suggested. 

"I'm perfectly fine and so is my back." Jungkook replied. He was ticked off, probably due to the lack of sleep and food in his system. 

Seokjin walked towards Yoongi's bedside and took his left hand, which was not connected to IVs. He rubbed the younger's hand with his thumb, a motherly gesture which reminded Jungkook of how caring the eldest was.

"His hand is ice cold." Seokjin said as he cupped both of his hands on Yoongi's frail looking ones. 

"I'll turn up the temperature." Jungkook said as he stood up from his seat, turning the termostat a few degrees more. He was about to walk back to his seat when Seokjin talked to him.

"Kook, have you considered the options Yoongi's doctors told you?" 

Jungkook froze midway. His eyes widened and his eyebrows furrowed from confusion.

"What are you trying to say? Are you telling me to kill my brother off?" To say that his reaction was over the top was an understatement. Seokjin was just asking a simple question and Jungkook's fuse blew up. He felt stupid everytime he thought about that incident. 

"It was an option to rid him of his pain, Jungkook-ah." Seokjin said, his eyes were glistening from tears that was threatening to fall. 

"No. Hyung will make it. I know he will." Jungkook answered.

"Even if he opened his eyes, do you have the heart to let him go through so much pain over and over again? His disease is uncurable, Min Jungkook." 

"So you're telling me to turn his life support off when he has an actual chance of surviving?" Jungkook raised his voice. Never in his life has he raised his  voice on the oldest. 

"Even if he survived this, his leukemia will keep taking it's toll on him. Jungkook-ah, spare him the pain." Seokjin said, no, it was almost as if the eldest begged with tears rolling down his cheeks. 

"I refuse to be the one taking his life." Jungkook muttered to himself before he sat down and raked all of his fingers down his hair. "Look, there are things I haven't told him, hyung."

"Then you're just being selfish. He told me that he wanted to live, not just to survive. Even if he wakes up, you're forcing him to live through his illness over and over again. I don't want to see him suffer any longer." Seokjin spit. "We care about Yoongi just as much as you do, Jungkook." 

"Don't give me that , hyung." Jungkook said as he chuckled darkly. "I'll stay with Yoongi hyung. You guys should go home."

"Kook, we-"

"Please. I need some time." The youngest said as he let out an exasperated sigh. Namjoon nudged at Seokjin, telling him that it's their cue to leave the siblings alone. 

"We'll return tomorrow. Try to get some rest too, Jungkook-ah." Namjoon said as he practically dragged Seokjin away. 

"Think about what I told you." Seokjin said as he exited the room. 

That night, Min Jungkook cried buckets.

Everything was dark. But dark doesn't necessarily meant something bad.

Vast darkness gave him tranquility. There was nothing around him. Everything was silent and he felt nothing except of the pressure of his body against the spring bed underneath him. 

It has been a month since his supposedly 'life-changing' operation. Jimin can't wait to take the bandage off of his eyes and to actually open his eyelids. He can't help to wonder either.

Why hasn't Yoongi visited him? Seokjin, Namjoon and even Jungkook visited him at least once. He asked them about Yoongi's whereabouts and their answers always varies. 

'He's sleeping at home.' 'He got work to do.' 'He needs to tend for the loose PVC pipe in Jungkook's bathroom.' 'He felt sick and couldn't come.' and several other excuses were thrown at him. 

"Tae, are you there?" Jimin said, unsure if his best friend was in his room. Taehyung has been uncharacteristically quiet these days.

"Yeah. I'm here." Taehyung replied, his voice groggy.

"Will I be taking my bandages off next week?" Jimin asked. He knew. It's just that he wanted to confirm things with Taehyung. 

"Yes. It says so on your schedule." 

"Will Yoongi hyung be coming to visit me today? Can you call him or leave him a message for me?" 

Taehyung froze. Jimin has the rights to know. He will figure things out sooner or later. It's just a matter of time until Jimin was informed with Yoongi's condition after all.

"Look, Chim," Taehyung got up from the sofa and walked towards Jimin's bedside. "I'm really sorry for keeping things away from you."

He found it hard to breathe. He found it excruciatingly painful to break Jimin, especially on such an awaited day.

"What is it, Tae? C'mon man, you're almost never serious. You being like this made me anxious all over." Jimin chuckled nervously. 

"Yoongi hyung can't visit you. Not that he doesn't want to." Taehyung started as he inhaled as much oxygen as his exhausted lungs could take.

"What do you mean?" The smile on Jimin's face faltered slowly, so does Taehyung's heart. 

"The day of your operation, Yoongi hyung got into an accident. He fell and hit his head." 

Jimin's head started spinning. 

"He was diagnosed with epidural hematoma. They had to drill a hole in his skull for the doctors to relieve the pressure inside it."

Tears started falling from Jimin's eyes only to be caught in his bandage. 

"He has been declared brain dead two weeks ago," Taehyung was starting to choke on his words. He was trying really hard to keep his words clear enough for Jimin to understand. "Jungkook has recently been considering on turning off his life support."

"No! He can't do that." Jimin practically screamed. "He- he can't."

"There's no reaction in his brain. Yoongi hyung was long gone. The only thing keeping him alive is the life support machine." 

Jimin was reduced to a crying, sobbing mess. He clutched his fist on his chest as he gasped for air. His bandage was wet, doused with his own tears. 

"How could you not t-tell me about t-this?"

Taehyung hung his head down low. He knew he did Jimin wrong. He deserved that. 

"And Seokjin hyung? Namjoon hyung? Jungkook? They didn't tell me either?" 

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I didn't have the courage to tell you and the others didn't have the heart to." Taehyung answered. 

"It doesn't validate the fact that you're keeping something so important away from me! I could've spend more time with him." Jimin raised his voice. 

Taehyung has almost never heard Jimin screaming before. Now he got to cross it from his 'things I've never experienced with Park Jimin' list. 

Jimin stood up and walked his way towards the door. Taehyung hot in his trails. 

The young doctor grabbed Jimin by the arm. "Where are you going?" 

"I'm going to see him. Get your hands off me." Jimin spat. 

Taehyung could only sigh. "You don't even know his room. I'll take you there." 

Jungkook was awakened from his short nap by the sound of the door being forcefully opened. He saw Park Jimin, with a stained bandage around his eyes and Taehyung whose eyes were as red as Namjoon's favorite brand of tomato ketchup. 

"How could you, Jeon Jungkook?" Jimin started. "How could you not tell me about him?" 

"I'm not responsible in informing you things concerning on my family matters." Jungkook said coldly. Surely, the situation took it's toll on everyone. 

"You're an ." Jimin spat. "You have always been jealous of me being around Yoongi. You're jealous of how happier he was around me." 

Jungkook chuckled darkly. "How are you so sure? You never even saw him." The youngest of the bunch walked towards Jimin and provocatively jabbed him on the shoulder. "All he felt for you was pity. A helpless, blind young man who knows nothing of the real world with his naive ideologies, trying to feel affection from the people around him. He was pitying you all along."

"And you? You have always been trying so hard to gain his attention and affection when this good for nothing blind man snatched him away from your grasp oh so easily." Jimin was not backing down at last. He always thought for the others before him. 'Maybe that person has been experiencing a hard day.' or 'Maybe he has problems back at home.' But he was done. He wanted to show the young man a piece of his mind.

Jungkook's eyes was widened, rage clearly visible in his brown orbs. Sensing that, Taehyung pulled Jimin away before Jungkook could throw his clenched fist on the latter's face. Jimin can't afford any physical trauma, especially nearing his eye region. 

"I didn't bring you here so you can fight with Jungkook." Taehyung muttered. "You wanted to be with Yoongi hyung so go ahead and be with him," Taehyung paused and drifted his eyes towards Jungkook. "Please give him some time." Taehyung was practically begging with his eyes. Jungkook sighed and walked outside, slamming the door behind him. "I'll leave you guys alone." Taehyung said as he sat Jimin on Yoongi's bedside. 

Yoongi's heart monitor was beeping on a lower frequency than what Jimin used to remember. He couldn't hear Yoongi breathing either. Instead, he heard mechanical hisses every several seconds coming from the heart-lung machine. 

"You're being unfair, hyung." Jimin said as he grabbed what was supposed to be Yoongi's right hand. "Is it too much for me to want to see you? If it's too much can I hear your voice? I'll do anything to hear your voice again, hyung. I don't have to see. It's okay as long as you're with me." Jimin's shoulders was shaking uncontrollably from sobbing so hard. 

"How could you? You waltzed into my life, bringing everything I've ever wanted, being someone I've always dreamt of." His grip on Yoongi's hand loosened. "And now you're leaving me alone just like this? There's so many things I want to do with you, so many things I haven't told you. You can't just give up on me. We're perfect together, hyung." 

No replies. Jimin knew very well there would be no one to answer his cries of help but it still hurts. 

"You're a mistake. Too much perfection is a mistake." 

He placed his head on Yoongi's bed and lifted the older's hand to place on top of his mop of hair. That day was the beginning of Jimin crying himself to sleep and waking up from a nightmare with a sob in the middle of the night every now and then. 

AN UPDATE SINCE LIKE FOREVER (and a long one at that) 

i'm so sorry people..

Please forgive the grammatical errors and the spelling mistakes.. it's 2 am right now XD 

There's not much left and I'm forever grateful to you readers

please upvote and subscribe! I'm trying to save karma points to advertise. If you enjoyed this fic, please do upvote (only if you want to)

AND PLEASE LEAVE SOMETHING ON THE COMMENT SECTION. Even a single fullstop is okay.. I want to know what you guys think about this. THANKYOU SO MUCH FOR READING, LOVELIESS <3

SEE YOU ON THE NEXT UPDATE~~~