The feeling when you walked through the familiar doors of your family’s house, they were as loud as ever. There you were, your heart was a shattered ruby, while everyone was still intact. You now understood why someone people have a fear of falling in love again, nor would you want to feel like what you’re feeling ever again. Your mind was a mix of crazy. You wanted to go there and break everything he had and punch him in the face, but you also wanted to lay in bed and just disappear from the world for a while. Naeun and Jungkook came down the stairs together, but she was the first to spot you. She abruptly stopped as if she could sense it.

“Are you OK? What are you doing here?” She asked. And just like that, the tears came again. You were NOT OK. You couldn’t even be strong in front of your family for even a second.

“Nora…” they said completely lost on what to do. How could they? They’ve rarely ever seen you cry unless it was at the movies or videos of cute puppies.

You ran to your brother’s room without answering. If you answered, then everything will be real.

The house immediately had gone from laughter and people talking over each other to whispering murmurs. Then now aside from being heartbroken, you also felt like a burden to your family. You didn’t want them to be unhappy just because you were. After a few hours, there was a tap at the door and Jackson poked his head inside. Now, adding to the list of guilts: your brother had to knock on his own door of his room.

“Hey…” He whispered gently as if if he spoke any louder, it’ll break your heart even more, “umm we kinda had dinner at Dad’s today… but if you’re not up for it. It’s cool. I’ll come up with an excuse or something.”

As much as you didn’t want to go and be left alone to cry in the dark. You felt like you needed to go, in hopes it’ll keep your mind off Jinyoung.

---

Your dad avoided you by picking at his food, while his wife kept looking at you with sympathetic eyes as she bit her lips trying hard not to talk about the elephant in the room. Jackson must’ve told them before you guys came. Thankfully Manse was the only normal one, making dinosaur sounds while attempting to mold his rice into T-rex. Jackson tried to make it less awkward by bringing up random small talks such as the new nightclub got shut down because a woman rode a horse inside or his frustration on the price rise of avocados. Your dad interrupted him mid-rant and mid-chopsticks-in-the-air. Your brother slammed his chopsticks down and took a deep breath to calm his temper and shook his shirt to cool himself. You noted to yourself that you should never touch his avocado.

“If you’re not working now, why don’t you come work at SS? I think we just opened up few entry positions open. I can talk to Ms. Kim in HR.”

For as long as you could remember, your dad had worked at the same company. “Dad, how long have you worked there? Aren’t you tired of working at the same place?”

He looked up trying to remember, “I think I’ve worked there since your two were babies?” He scratched his head, “Yeah, around there. You had barely started potty training.” He smiled sadly at the past. “ It doesn’t matter if I’m bored or tired, as long as there’s food on the table for my family and a warm place to sleep, it makes boring work bearable. I’d do anything work if that means I could come home to my healthy and happy family.” His wife squeezed his hand out of gratefulness, however just like a switch, it the memory of what he did to your family. His old family. Has he forgotten how UNHAPPY he made you guys?

You pounded the table as you stood up. You looked him dead in his old widen eyes. “I guess we didn’t matter as much to you since you didn’t even try to keep us happy.” You knew you were directing the anger at the wrong person, but you couldn’t help it. Your dad decided long ago that the other woman was worth breaking his family apart. Now he wanted to sit there and tell you that all he wants is for his family to be healthy and happy? HAPPY?! Bull! Jinyoung also decided his family was worth more than you. But no one stopped to think about how you would feel. You had a beating heart inside you too. You could feel the nicks of words and the slashes of actions. Were you just like a bench where people could come, sit and go so easily? Did your happiness not matter? Tears spilled onto your food.

“Whoa Nora, what are you talking about?” Jackson stood up with his hand out as if to hold you back as if he thought you were going to jump onto the table.

Manse began to cry by the surprise commotion you created which made you feel bad. Without another word, you walked out the door.

You heard your dad call your name with his breath haggard and heavy. You began to cry even more. You stopped because the street got too blurry.

“Nora.” He held onto your arm to make sure you weren’t going to l