I Was Forced To

Why Must Him ?
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Hey so we meet again. There is something change about me and it shouldn't. Yeah, look like I'm in a big trouble. I become a selfish son ever. I hate it! really.. I hate looking into my parent eyes and see those fear in it. I wish I can die as soon as possible everytime their tears fall into my cheeks. I cannot take it anymore, I just want to die so all the sadness will end soon, but.. everything was in past. Since I discover my true feeling, without my knowing.. I secretly pray to God for give me another chances to breath everytime I being dragged to hospital. It's all because one reason.. Because I want to see him. I want to be near him. I want to make him smile. I want..

 

 

I want to stay alive..

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    The cold wind that dancing in the sky occasionally caress their cheek as they wait at the bus stop. Its only 9 in the morning but the never sleep city, Seoul already full of people going here and there. Vehicles and smoke can be seen all the way of the city. Bambam take his chance to seat near the bus stop and observe his other friends playing while waiting for the bus like he do. He smile a little when looking at Jinyoung and Youngjae who's getting hit by Jaebum because they accidentally bump onto some strangers at the bus stop. Today is the day where he and his fellows to go to camping like they promise before the holidays. Bambam cannot hide his excitement to spend his days with the new friends and his lover at the outside under the beautiful sky. 

   After he get bored with the nagging Jaebum, the younger then changes his view to his older brother who seem so engrossed watching the video on Mark's phone with the owner and Yugyeom. How can they be together? It is when Mark was showing to Jackson their favourite band new music video and when the song start, Yugyeom body immediately respon to it. Without thinking, the younger walk to them. Fortunately, Yugyeom is one of the band fans too so the three of them end up standing not so far from the bus stop. 

    "Cool man!" Jackson clap his big hands right after the song end. Yugyeom face too draw a satisfied daddy smile agter the song finish. "I told you they are the best!" Mark say to the another two and locked his eyes with the youngest. His heart beat a little fast when the younger grin to him. "You are not so bored like I thought you were." Yugyeom break the eyes contact and laughing to Jackson words like the older did. Somewhat the hatred on Jackson because stole his Bambam seem fading as they share the laughter together. "Well me too. I never thought you would be so ing cheesy." Jackson cheek turn a little pink after that. Yugyeom and Mark laugh their out at the blushing Jackson and the redding boy try his best to not kill the two of them.

   "Yahh! Choi Youngjae come here!" Jaebum loud voice attract the attention of them. They all look at the same way where Jaebum has his hard time to stop his boyfriend from running away with Jinyoung. The way Youngjae hands and Jinyoung's glue together secretly give a weird feeling in Mark heart. "Atleast mine not sassy like that." Jackson point up Youngjae with grin on his face and without knowing his words was hurting the other two heart. Yugyeom die a little inside when Jackson declare the mine words and make he realize that Bambam is not his anymore. The boy already have someoneelse in his life. Mark who is the man that have the same feeling toward Bambam like the way Jackson do too feel the pang of it. He look at Yugyeom with the corner of his eyes and he can see it clearly that the younger was broken. The smile on his face no longer there as Jackson make his ways to Bambam and give a small peck on the latter lips.

    "Do you cold princess?" Jackson say to Bambam with a bright smile on his face as he sat down next to the younger. Bambam pout his lips when his older brother call him princess instead prince. "Hyung! Do I look like a girl to you? It's prince not princess." Jackson cannot help but laugh at the sight of sulking Bambam, it was way too much for him to handle the cuteness and the resolution to that is by cupping his younger brother face and push their lips together. 

    Bambam's cheek turn a little pink when he notice some people were now looking at them. Jackson just admire the scene infront of his eyes. The way Bambam eyes become smaller when he smile or laugh, the way he bit his bottom lips when he being shy, all the things Bambam did are so beautiful to describe in words. How he wish he can rewind the time and do better for Bambam from the start than wasting it with the s he did mean to.

    "Hyung?" Jackson look into Bambam eyes after let out a hum to answer the younger call. The two of them locked into each other eyes for minutes before Bambam nonchalantly kiss the older lips. The kiss was a fast peck and hardly to feel the taste of it, it's just a simple innoncent kiss but successly to put them into the Cloud 9. Jackson cheek turn into hot red within seconds. He does not expect the latter can be this brave to stole a kiss from him. "Hyung! Are you blushing? Oh my God hyung! You are so cute!" he become more lost with Bambam tease, "Shut up!" Jackson have no words to say to the laughing kid next to him. He then follow the younger and laugh along.

    Their sweet moment got disturbed by Jaebum call who force them to stay near in place because the bus will arrive soon. Jackson and Bambam make their way to the busstop same as Mark and Yugyeom. "Dude, do you bring the book I told you last night?" ask Yugyeom to Bambam as he walk to stand near his bestfriend. "Hyung to you Gyeomie and yes ofcourse!" Yugyeom come near Bambam and they have a short conversation before the bus came. The seven of them walk into the bus with their bag on their back.

    Bambam and Yugyeom are sitting next to each in the bus while Jaebum, Youngjae and Jackson sit at the back. At first Jackson want to be with Bambam but the sassy Youngjae push him hardly that make him accidentaly set his on the back of the bus. End of the fight between Jackson who want to change his seat and Youngjae who don't want to move, the victory goes to Youngjae with a simple reason. "Once you stand, there's no seat for you anymore. Look how crowded this place are!"

    With that, Jackson finally force to agree to just sit there. Mark and Jinyoung were together and Jackson can see the dark cloud all over Jinyoung head. 

    "Want some?" Mark try to start a talk between him and Jinyoung by using Jinyoung favourite snack as a bait. "No. Thanks you." well seem like the fish were full now. "Uhh, alright" the awkwardness take no time to grow and hug them ing tightly. Jinyoung totally ignore the older by watching some movie on his phone and Mark become more impatient when he try to hold Jinyoung hands but the latter broke it with annoyed face. "What the is wrong with you Jinyoung?" Mark put his palm ontop of Jinyoung phone to stop him from watching the stupid damn movie and with that, he get a death glare from the younger but he coould care less. He just cannot go anymore with the whatsoever Jinyoung game by ignore him.

   "Excuse me Mark-ssi, ask yourself first. Why the you disturbing me while watching this? Put your hands away!" Jinyoung try to shove away Mark hands from the screen but the older work a little fast by confiscate the phone from Jinyoung hand and put them into his pocket. "What are you doing?! Give it  back to me! now!" Jinyoung half scream half whisper to Mark. His tone clearly show that he is pissed off with Mark action. "Focus on me can't you?" Mark is not much difference from the younger, he also getting mad and more mad as each second pass. The younger once again ignore what ever Mark want and try to get his phone back but Mark is much stronger than him and when he push Jinyoung down to his seat, he give up. Jinyoung groan frustratedly when he know he cannot get his phone back with Mark being all dominance over him.  "What do you want?" Jinyoung try to not speak with a loud voice because he aware that some passengers already have their eyes on them.

    "Why you being like this? What did I do wrong?" Mark ask the younger after he calm hisself. Jinyoung let out a heavy sigh. "Tell hyung Jinyoung. Did hyung do something that hurt you? Hm?" Mark reach for Jinyoung hand and for this time the latters do not push it away. He let the older hold him because he do not sure if he can stand alone anymore. "Nothing. I'm tired, just that. Okay?" Mark squeeze Jinyoung's hand lightly to tell him that he does not satisfied with the younger answer.

   "I talk the truth hyung. I just tired. Nothing more. You just overact about this." Jinyoung tap the back of Mark palm softly with a smile on his face. In his mind, he continuously praying to God for Mark to stop ask him more question. He may break down right there. "You are tired but you run here and there with Youngjae, you slap Jackson , you laugh your off with Yugyeom and Bambam but become suddenly tired when it's me? Stop l

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cuzpcy
#1
Chapter 10: Markkk! Why aren't you falling For Yugyeom?ㅠ.ㅠ*crying My heart out*
cuzpcy
#2
Chapter 8: Aww Mark calmed down i mean lately he's more soft and he helped bambam Too!❤❤
jackbam07 #3
Chapter 30: Please update it been a long time ):
Kcrescent_V
#4
Chapter 30: Update soon authormin
goteat7 #5
Chapter 30: Fightiiing....... thank u for update. U are the best ;)
♡♡♡♡
purplenekochan #6
Chapter 30: Please do not abandon this fic. :(
It's okay. We will wait but just don't leave us hanging :(
selumiere
#7
Chapter 30: finally update and this story make me cry as always ;;;;

i'll always waiting until this story reach the end, take your time authornim and fighting!♡

(i'm sorry i'm not good for making words TwT)
wawa_ika200 #8
Chapter 29: Oouuuhhh...its so heartbreaking ya know authornim...i wish jackson could have at least alittle time to spent with bambqm together bfore he died...i felt so sorry for bamie....guys take a gud care of bamie...authornim...when will u update it again...iwant to know the ending...