Chapter 39. One Last Shot

I watch you spin around in your highest heels

You are the best one, of the best ones

~stolen (dashboard confessional)

“You keep on looking at your phone! Do you want me to confiscate it?” Minho animatedly asked as soon as she got out of the car and they stood there.

“Noooo!” She waved her hand, “I can never let you do that! Not right now, anyway.”

“Hahaha!” he laughed then nodded, playfully fixing a sad face, “Alright.”

“I'll go up now, thank you so much for the ride.” Seo Hyun was about to turn but she felt his grip on her arm swinging her back to face him. Suddenly, he cupped her cheek and she froze when he closed his eyes and he was about to kiss her. She smiled and hang her head low that his lips rested on her forehead. It was for a second that she felt his kiss and opened her eyes when he let her loose, “I'm so sorry...”

“Yeah,” Minho smiled. It must be the cruelest thing she ever made him feel but it was him who was causing his own torture. He took one lonely step away from her.

“Let's meet tomorrow morning at Yoona's cafe,” she solemnly said.

“Okay, I'll see you then,” he nodded, still feeling that pang of pain inside, “Run along now, Seo Hyun before I change my mind...”

“I'll see you tomorrow,” she ran up the steps then turned to wave at him. Guilt will always haunt her. Guilt of unconsciously making Minho feel that way about her. She just prayed that he would find that right woman for him because she would never be that person.

Opening the lights, she slumped on the bed holding her phone and wondered what happened for he did not answer after that message. Maybe he got busy about something else and she should not make herself worry too much. She stood and opened a window, the hot air trapped inside for the rest of the day finally dispersed as cooler wind sneaked inside. Letting her back hit the bed once again, she stared at the ceiling recreating the scene in the office.

She just had to shut her eyes tight and felt silly. The moment was overpowering her will and she totally lost control and it was so obvious that he was in the same trance. Opening her eyes again, she managed to brush the thought off her mind for awhile as she slanted her head back to look at the clock. It was almost a quarter to ten so she decided to go but her phone abruptly pulled her out of the thought.

It was 'you.'

Seo Hyun could not help but smile. It's been a long time.

“Anyeong haseyo...” she started as she sat back, “Mianheyo. Lately, I have been so happy that I easily fall asleep. I missed your calls but every time I wake up in the middle of the night and look at my phone and see your name, I feel like calling you. I feel like I wanted to share what is in my heart.” Her fingertips were tracing those little flowers on her sheets. With a smile, she continued, “I don't know, you have become my breather, it's like talking to myself, it's like listening to my own thoughts. It's like doing those things that I would usually consider crazy doing alone, but with you around... I really don't feel like losing my mind...”

She stopped, throwing a glance on the clock by her bedside. It was almost time.

“Tonight I stand on a crossroad but I know where I should face... which one should I take because this time I will only follow my heart because it silenced reason already. Even though reason would be on it's side, it won't take heed anymore. The heart is stubborn after all. I have to hang up now... I need to go somewhere.”

~~~

“What are you? Kissing buddies? Give me a break, Seo!” Yoona grunted as she rolled her eyes. Deep inside, she has been screaming her lungs out for her friend. Maybe she was a big fan of this paring that she could not help herself but she must keep her cool, “So you are technically not together yet?”

“Yeah, not yet... officially or anything,” she rested her chin on her palms while she balanced the weight of her head on her elbow. She grinned exposing those white teeth obviously excited of her planned event later.

“Ya... ya...” Yoona pronounced with voice toned down and eyes half-squinting to bring a halt to her sister's crazy reverie, “Stop dragging things! This is not time for both of you to go slacking with your relationship. You two should even get married the soonest possible time.”

“Tell that to yourself, Unnie...” Seo Hyun chuckled ignoring that flushed face.

“Ya! We are talking about you here...” she hit her friend with a pillow then fanned herself with her hands, “Come on, Seo Hyun, what do you plan to do?”

“Just spend the five days with him,” she said dreamily, “It's like going to make up for the years we were apart.”

“How mushy!” Yoona gave her a sarcastic laugh, “And why are you still here? Go get your boyfriend!”

Seo Hyun laughed then drew a serious face, “But I have another thing to tell you.”

“Hmmm? You have so many things that you have been keeping from me?” She raised her brows.

“Aniya!” Waving her hands, she sat comfortably on the floor, “It's not like that. Let's just say I know how you would react about it so I chose not to tell you soon.”

“Okay, you're making me nervous, tell me now.”

“There's this person that has been calling me.” She has been thinking of telling her that but every time they talk she felt like betraying the person. Somehow, she wanted to keep the caller as her secret— someone whose existence must remain to her and to that person. If her hunch was correct, then she wanted him to be each other's little secret. But she resolved to tell Yoona, since she was starting to feel uncomfortable with the calls.

“A person? He or she?” Yoona probed when she just shrugged, “Do you answer the call?”

“Yes...” she said in a mellow tone. Sitting on the bed beside her sister, she continued, “I have a hunch that it's him.”

“Him? As in Yong Hwa Oppa? What makes you say that?”

She nodded, “Because I remember the caller started calling me almost at the same time when he came back here in Seoul. I don't know Unnie, it must be a crazy assumption but when I realized that, I had this comfortable feeling of knowing it was him. Of talking to him despite the fact that he wouldn't talk back.”

“What were you telling him?”

“Everything... all this time, it was my way of telling him how I feel...”

“You mean, you told this caller that you love Yong Oppa?”

“I sort of did...”

“Oh my gahhhhhh!” Yoona squealed in delight. But then again, she should be rational so she cleared , “But Seo you're still not sure, right?”

“Yeah, I know... but I just can't help it. That's the way I feel. All along it's him. Sometimes I get frustrated like I want to shout at him and tell him that he doesn't need to hide inside that phone. Like he can tell me right there that it was him.”

“Then what if it's really him? What are you going to do?”

“I don't know yet if I will feel happy or not. Half of me wants it to be him, but half is doubtful, like it was another lie he created.”

“How does it become a lie?”

“Because, he is leading me on...”

“But it's you who is supplying him of things that he probably knows now.”

“Because not telling is the same as lying, Unnie.”

“Fine...” she threw her hands up in the air. Seo Hyun would never let her argument lose to hers, “There's a big possibility that it's not him either. Maybe you just put that probability that it was him. What if it's not?”

“I know...” she sighed, “But, I'm just so drawn to him. One time, I swear I thought I heard him sigh— a deep voiced sigh that sounded so familiar it made me nervous. Perhaps that was the moment I started to believe it was him. It was so familiar... something that was only him...”

“You thought, Seo? You're not sure.” Yoona muttered. Romantic— yes, but not a wise move. “You should stop answering the person's calls from now on, Seo. You should know better than talk to a stranger.”’

“What should I do, Unnie?”

“Whether it's him or not... stop answering his calls... or for the last time ask the person. If he won't give you any answer then let it be a sign for you to let go of this so-called breather. Besides, you don't need it anymore since you are about to start with your Yong Oppa all over again.”

~~~

Ji Son felt betrayed.

Nobody else made him feel like that. The last time something like that happened was in the playground. A girl befriended him just to steal his unopened lollipop. He will never forget the girl's face or even the pretty woman and some rock star who picked her up after that. He did not dare tell his nanny because the old woman might create a scene. Although the girl's father looked friendly with that funny mashimaro smile, her mom looked beautiful but fierce as she started raising her voice on the girl because she soiled her dress.

Brushing the thought aside, he felt mad again. Who could that guy be? Should he even tell his Appa what he saw? Maybe not, he might look sad again and he doesn't want to see him look like that again. He will just keep it a secret and maybe ask Yoona-ssi why she did not keep her promise to start loving his Appa.

Munching on the remaining chocolate-chip cookie in his hand, he shook his head. It was probably time for him to talk to him. He said before he was happy that he is a boy not a girl because it would be easier to talk about boy things. Maybe it was a boy thing. And if he got sad maybe he should remind him of what he said to him every time he cries, “Ji Son, face it like a man and stop crying!”

After two consecutive yawns, he decided to crawl to bed after tiptoeing to unlock his door.

~~~

His little boy has opened his bedroom door but Si Won found him in deep sleep. When Ji Son came home after school, he went straight to his room and locked himself up. He would usually do that whenever he was in a bad mood so he would just leave a glass of milk and a plate of cookies outside his bedroom.

Si Won took the empty glass and plate on the floor and deposited on the sink. Something must have happened in school since he could not really remember if they had a standing argument that day. Maybe during breakfast tomorrow he could try talking to him.

Taking the phone, he dialed her number, “Hello? Yoona-ssi?”

“Oppa...”

He chuckled at her somewhat annoyed tone by the way he addressed her, “Hey, love. How's your day? Sorry I wasn't able to drop by.”

“It's okay... hmmm, my day... special, I had a special day.”

“Special day? Without me? Is that good?” Si Won frowned but laughed softly upon hearing her laughter on the other end of the line.

“Khun Oppa was here. I told you about it.”

“Yeah, what happened?” He sat on his couch. Yoona did tell him about that meeting and even asked him to drop by if he could. It was tempting— to be there and meet the other guy but he chose not to. She has told him about them, their past and what can never disappear in her heart. His past relationship must have thought him to be more accepting of those things. Besides, he has his own that she willingly accepted and embraced.

“We talked, it's like finally having our closure that was long overdue.”

“Hmmm...” shifting the phone on the other hand, he nodded as if she was just right in front of him, “I'm glad to hear that then...” The bathroom door opened so he leaned back and saw Ji Son coming out but he decided to ignore him. The kid was hard to handle when he's on that mood. “Yoona?” He asked when she did not say anything.

“You're cool about it, right? Me meeting him and all?”

He laughed. “Of course! He's a part of your life, I can't really be an as$ about that.”

“Aigooo...”

“Why?” Si Won almost laughed out loud again when she sighed that way. She is such an adorable woman. He was waiting for her to answer again. Yoona seemed to be taking her sweet little time on this conversation.

“I was hoping you would be jealous. Would it be nicer if you're jealous?”

Laughing out loud again, he lounged on his seat then cleared his throat. “Aish... you women, really.”

“Why?”

Yoona was suppressing a laugh, that was for sure, so he answered in a serious tone, “You tell us men that we don't understand you...” he chuckled upon hearing her 'uh-huh' “...and if we try to understand you, you would do a total cartwheel! What's up with that?”

“All I'm saying is that, I'm really happy that you're not jealous but showing a bit of it won't hurt? I guess...”

“Alright, I'm jealous,” he rolled his eyes and let his head fall on the backrest of the chair, “...but just a little because I know that