Crushed dreams
Seeking for Certainty“She’s taking a half-day?” Sehun asked Bora as he saw Suzy packing her things earlier than expected.
“All work is done, anyways,” Bora shrugged.
“But it’s still unusual for her to go home early,” Sehun mumbled.
The girl sighed before asking, “Do you really want the reason why? Caution: It’s going to break your heart.”
“What is it?” Sehun asked as he turned to her.
Bora stared right into his eyes before whispering, “It’s their anniversary tomorrow.”
Sehun smiled but the gloom in his eyes were evident and Bora could only pat the male’s back in an attempt to comfort him. But then soon, they were interrupted by Suzy’s voice,
“I’m leaving. Goodbye!”
“Take care~” Bora chimed and waved.
She was back to arranging some files when she heard the door creak again. Looking at the entrance, she found Sehun with his bag. The question she wanted to ask came out of Key’s mouth,
“Where are you going?”
“I’m taking a half-day too,” Sehun said.
“Are you asking for my permission or are you merely informing me?” Key raised an eyebrow at him.
Sehun paused before answering, “I’m sorry but it’s the latter.”
And even before Key could speak again, the former had already taken his leave. As Key’s eyes met Bora’s, he smirked and uttered,
“I think we’ve just found another person sick in love.”
“Sounds more like a masochist for me,” Bora replied with another shrug.
Suzy was done buying groceries for the dinner she wanted to prepare for their anniversary. It was rare for her to cook for Myungsoo but she would always make it special. She was thinking of what gift to buy but she was having difficulties of carrying all the bags. But then, the grocery bags were taken from her and turning to her helper, she widened her eyes upon finding Sehun.
“Yah,” she bellowed. “Are you escaping work?”
“I got permission from Key hyung,” Sehun lied with a big smile. “Come on. I’ll accompany you.”
“What? Wait. No,” she shook her head, thinking that she would clearly ‘cause him pain if she brought him with her to get a present for another guy.
“It’s okay. I already know,” Sehun said. But his words contradicted with the smile he showed.
“I can manage on my own,” she uttered as she straight into his eyes.
“You’re alone most of the time- at your home and when you stay late for work,” Sehun said as he started walking. “I feel like it’s my obligation to keep you company.”
“No one’s obligating you nor forcing you to do anything,” she whispered coldly as she kept up with his pace.
“That’s right,” Sehun nodded. “This is purely voluntary so there’s no need to feel burdened, Suzy.”
“You hurt yourself by doing all of these for me. How would I not feel burdened?” she retorted, still keeping her eyes glued to him.
“Because it’s something you can do nothing about,” Sehun replied as they walked together. “It’s inevitable. One would always want to be near the person he/she loves despite all the pain.”
Suzy kept silent because she couldn’t agree more. She couldn’t blame him nor ask him any further, because she too, was holding onto a love so painful.
“I guess falling in love was never easy,” Sehun jokingly said in a whisper.
“Falling in love is easy,” Suzy chuckled and met his eyes before adding in a whisper, “It’s when you’re in love that things start to become complicated.”
There was another silence but Sehun didn’t speak. He knew that she wanted to say more, that there were things Suzy wanted to speak out but found no one to share it with.
She started with a sigh, “You would want your worlds to revolve around each other but that’s never the case. Love is never the only factor playing in people’s lives.”
“But that’s not enough reason to stop loving, is that what you believe so?” Sehun asked.
“Hmmmm,” Suzy nodded with a smile.
“But I think pain is a reason to stop loving,” Sehun retorted.
Suzy faced him with knitted eyebrows as she complained, “What? You’re really inconsistent. I thought you believe hurting is a part of loving.”
“Yes, I do acknowledge that,” Sehun slowly nodded. “But what I mean is, when pain outweighs love, one should get out of the relationship.”
When he was replied with a blank stare, and the silence grew, he knew that it was a bad move.
“Sorry,” he mumbled. “I’m sorry.”
“No,” Suzy shook her head. “I think you’re right… but I love him, Sehun to the point that I don’t think the world could give me a reason to let go or present me a pain bigger than our love for each other.”
When Sehun answered her with a sad smile, she felt apologetic to the male, but she could no longer retreat the words she had just said. She was about to apologize but then Sehun stopped her, “Don’t say sorry.”
Immediately redirecting their conversation, he asked, “So where do you plan to buy your gift for him?”
“I don’t know…” her words trailed as her eyes caught sight of a shop.
When Sehun felt that Suzy had stopped walking beside him, he turned around just to find her gaping in front of a shop. Walking back towards her, he realized that she was staring at a wedding gown. The dress was simple; from the waist up was satin hugging the mannequin’s body perfectly and the lower part was made up of layers of white translucent cloth extending only up to the knees.
“I bet that it would look good on you,” he smiled.
Suzy snapped out of her trance but she replied him with a smile of her own and said, “But I like it longer so that the dress would dance on the floor as I walk down the aisle.”
There was a short silence before Suzy added, “You know, it was a wedding gown that made me realize I was in love with Myungsoo.”
“How is that so?”
“When I closed my eyes, it’s not only me in the gown I saw but also him waiting for me, on the other end of the aisle.”
“Was it easy falling for Myungsoo, then?” Sehun asked, and Suzy wondered if Sehun was really a born masochist, asking questions about the man she loves.
“I was in high school and the first
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