They never had any kind of conversation since their last fight. They broke their promise to Sunggyu’s mother by sleeping in separate rooms. There’s no meal time they could spent together since he always eat outside and Eunji’s strike of cooking for him. They live as if they were two strangers live under a same roof without any interaction at all. They acted as if the other didn’t even exist. Everything was just as cold as ice.

Eunji cried herself more and more every night. The day after their last fight, she went to the nearest pharmacy to buy a set of pregnancy test on the hope that she was pregnant. But the result was negative and she literally shrieked out load right away after she did it in the bathroom.

She didn’t lose hope yet, so she went to a gynecologist to have a proper test. Again, the result was negative but the gynecologist told her to wait some more days to take another test since sometimes the symptom of pregnancy couldn’t be read that easily. Eunji held on patiently—until she found out that she was getting her period another day.

Thus, she lost all of her hope to make him considering about their relationship. Even though her husband would disown their baby for sure, at least she had a reason to keep herself always beside him. Eunji was so desperate, she didn’t know what to do and just crying. She was trying to prepare herself anytime Sunggyu would ask to divorce her. She couldn’t bear him anymore, yet she didn’t have any gut to say farewell to him either.

In fact, she was missing him so much. They only separated by a thin wall between their rooms, but yet he seemed too far away.

***

Couple weeks passed, and their cold war seemed wouldn’t ever be subside. But then she heard someone creaking the room door opened and she could tell that that person was shifting on the other side of the bed, right behind her own back.

It was him.

He was desperate as well that he couldn’t sleep every night he heard her sobbing through the thin wall between their rooms. He always listened to every sound she made, ensuring that she was fine enough behind the barrier parting them. He could only sleep right after she made no sound anymore indicating that she has already slept.

However he couldn’t hold it anymore. Though he wasn’t sure of what has he felt about her, he was missing her too much that he tried to open the door to their room and relieved that she didn’t lock it. He laid himself onto the empty space beside her—behind her, precisely. And there he was watching at her cold back whimpering as she was holding back her tears. He knew that she already noticed his presence and he felt guilty for her to hold her tears like that. Truth is, he wanted to cry as well but he was strong enough to hold it back. He was the man with his pride after all.

He slipped his hands to hug her from behind and pulled her closer to him. She jolted for the sudden contact and when she realized what was happen, she tried to release herself from his embrace. However, his hands were too strong for her and every time she tried to , he just tightened his hug even more.

“Let go of me!” she groaned and tried to elbow him, but he didn’t budge at all.

“Let go of me! Let go of me!” she whined and squirmed hard but he wouldn’t ever released her out of his embrace. He didn’t want to lose her anymore.

She strived to roll in his hug so that she could look at him face to face. There he was. He looked so desperate and sad that his brows formed into its infamous ‘八’shape. Whilst, her face was swollen and wet because of her tears. He wanted to wipe it all by his hand, but he was too afraid of losing his grip on her yet his own eyes felt moist as well.

“Let. Go. Of. Me!” she punched on his chest several times as she shouted every word to him and he just let her to do whatever she want except for escaping his embrace. He let her punching at him because he knew that he has hurt her so much more and he thought it as his punishment for hurting her. “Let go of me, Oppa! Let go of me!” she whined even more.

“I don’t want you to touch me just for dumping me in the morning!” she blurted out. “Let go of me, Oppa! Please…,” she cried onto his chest but he pulled her closer instead of letting her go as she wished. He let her crying on his chest and didn’t mind at all whether she wetted all over his T-shirt. He held her closer and leaned his chin on her crest.

Out of nowhere, he sang. And she started to calm down by listening to every word in his song lyrics.

I love you, I’m sorry

So I can’t do it anymore
I don’t even have the right to approach you
Don’t love me

I can’t afford to give you my heart
I struggle to live every day
And each day is so burdensome so I cry

Oh, I… there’s nothing I can give you
(but I’m) missing you
I can’t even say warm words to you
But I’m missing you
I don’t dare expect anything from you
But I’m missing you
So I push you awa