May 14, 2014

Four days has passed since Sunggyu's last visit to the restaurant where Seul-ki was working. There weren't any phone calls either, or texts or even the slightest news about him.  Many times she would take out her phone and try to dial his number just to hear his voice and to know whether he was okay but each time she would put away her phone and cry herself to sleep. As much as she wanted to go back, there was still a feeling of resentment whenever she closes her eyes when she saw the image of her husband kissing someone else replaying before her.

The restaurant owner has been watching her all the while she was staring at the empty table that Sunggyu was always sitting at. Quietly, she approached the young woman and patted her shoulder and offered her a kind smile. Seul-ki looked a little abashed for she has been spacing out when she should be helping in the kitchen.

"If he's meant for you, you'll meet him again someday." The older woman said. Seul-ki looked at her wondrously and she smiled and said, "It'll be a waste if you don't. You even cooked for him and it was the first time he finished his food here. Maybe he'll come back again to have another taste."

Seul-ki smiled faintly. "I hope he will..." The owner shot her another warm smile and Seul-ki watched her walking off to the cash register again. She took a deep breath and stared at the empty table for a few seconds more before retreating into the kitchen again, wishing secretly that Sunggyu would really come by again.

When she arrived at Ye-eun's house that evening, the first thing she noticed was the scattered shoes at the entrance, and a pair of man's shoes. She blinked rapidly to herself, unsure of whether to just go in and act casually or get out of the house. When she craned her ears and heard the soft rumbling and laughter from the bedroom, she went out again, with her face red.

She made her way to the shopping district, walking aimlessly, not knowing what to do or whether she should head back or spend the night outside. She couldn't blame Ye-eun for bringing her boyfriend home since it was her house after all and she had been crashing in for absolutely no charge except for the breakfasts and lunches that she made for them. It made her a little lonely though, and thinking about Ye-eun's boyfriend made her think about Sunggyu and it made her heart hurt very much.

Putting aside her thoughts, she went on walking, a little conscious that she was probably smelling like onions and chicken from the kitchen. She sighed, and almost didn't notice that Myungsoo was standing outside a convenience store, looking a little cold from the weather. She stopped short, staring at him who was dressed fully in black again, and his skin was rather pale. Seconds later, he noticed her as well, and his eyes grew a little distant. They were just staring at one another for a few seconds before he gave her a little smile which she failed to return.

"You shouldn't be in this area," he said, rather accusingly. Seul-ki looked away, feeling dejected. Of course it was not unusual to see Myungsoo in the area since most of the students were living in the neighbourhood except for probably her. Somehow she had managed to avoid bumping into Myungsoo by not going anywhere except for to the restaurant and Ye-eun's house. "Are you staying at your friend's house again?" Seeing that Seul-ki was just being quiet, he sighed, "You should go back inside. You know that you can't tolerate the cold well." He watched her sullen face for a moment. "I'll be going now."

With that, he sniffed and pursed his lips into straight thin line, and walked away, leaving Seul-ki behind, still unmoving from her stance. She watched him disappearing at the corner, and a hollow feeling was starting to emerge from inside her gut. It was undeniable that she missed him for he was all that she had before and it was sad to think that her marriage had ruined their friendship but when she thought about it, she immediately felt guilty towards Sunggyu and her emotions got mixed up again.

Her phone started singing JYJ's Nine suddenly, and she quickly reached for it from inside her jeans. It was Ye-eun. She cleared and felt the embarrassment from before emerging again. "Hello. Oh... I'll be home. Now. Um. Okay." She hung up and took a long look at the corner again, before she made her way back to Ye-eun's house.

Ye-eun was fresh from shower when Seul-ki arrived, and the latter was only being quiet as she scrambled out from her jacket and her shirt. Ye-eun was then lying on her back on her bed, smiling to her phone which she held above her face. When she noticed that Seul-ki was staring at her, she turned to her. "You're late today."

"Oh..." Seul-ki smiled awkwardly. "I was home, but..."

"Oh my god!" Ye-eun cupped and sat up straight. "You..."

"I only saw his shoes and some noises from the room, so I thought you needed some uh, privacy," she explained, shrugging awkwardly.

"We weren't doing anything." Ye-eun said, clearing . "We were just kissing and doing light things..."

"Okay..."

"Sorry if it made you uncomfortable."

"No! It's fine. This is Ye-eun's house anyway... So, it's okay..."

Ye-eun looked at her apologetically, and then she sighed and looked up the ceiling. "I think I'm in love."

"You seem so." Seul-ki smiled widely, and couldn't help but to stare at Ye-eun's dreamy face.

"Maybe I should marry him."

"Don't you think it's kind of too early for that?"

Ye-eun laughed a little. "What is too early to marry someone you love when you yourself were arranged to marry someone you didn't? Love can always be developed after you're married, isn't that right?"

"I don't know..." Seul-ki hung her face low, and felt her eyes twitching. "I don't know anymore."

"Did I say something wrong?" Ye-eun asked, softly. "I didn't mean to offend you or anything..."

"It's okay."

"Seul-ki, is everything alright?"

She took a few seconds before she nodded and smiled. "Yes, I'm good." Ye-eun looked unconvinced but Seul-ki didn't want her to feel burdened by her marriage problem when she was on cloud nine about her boyfriend. It was unfair to her as well. It was enough that she was troubling her by staying at her house; she couldn't afford to make any more mess. "I'm going to shower now," she announced, avoiding Ye-eun's gaze and made her way to the bathroom where she spent half an hour just crying under the shower.

A call from Dongwoo the next morning woke Seul-ki up with a start as she sat up quickly and tried to clear her blurry vision. As she couldn't even read the name on her phone, she answered it and felt her heart hammering. But when she heard Dongwoo's voice, she felt a little disappointed.

"Seul-ki? Hello?"

"Oh, Dongwoo-sshi. Hello."

"Did I wake you up? I'm sorry."

"It's okay. I was waking up anyway. Why is Dongwoo-sshi..."

"How are you?" Dongwoo's voice sounded warm, and it made Seul-ki a little sad for some reason.

"I'm... good."

"I'm glad to hear that. Are you staying at your friend's?"

"Um..." She nodded to herself, feeling her vision getting clearer. Somehow it felt like it was her father who was calling her, for she felt warm just by hearing his voice but then again, she couldn't be sure since she never had one.

"Listen... I'm calling you to ask you if you're free today. Are you?"

"Today?" Seul-ki looked up the ceiling, as if there was a calendar written up there. "I have to go to work at about 5... Is there anything?"

"Well, actually we're going to have a little party at my house tonight."

"Party?"

"Um, birthday party."

"Whose birthday?"

"Uh... Me?"

"OH!" she exclaimed, fully awake then, and awkwardly she wished him happy birthday. Dongwoo thanked her cheerfully and laughed. "I'm sorry I didn't know..."

"It's okay!" he said, loudly. "So, do you think you can make it tonight?"

"Um... I'm not very sure..."

"The kids will be there. I think they'll be happy to see you."

"Oh..." she took a deep breath before asking, "Will Sung...gyu-sshi be there?"

"Ah... Gyu-hyung? I'm not so sure. He's been busy with work lately. Said he'll come if he could clear up his work." Dongwoo said, effortlessly, as if he had been rehearsing the line, but Seul-ki was too immersed in her thoughts that she didn't realise it. "Will you come if Gyu-hyung comes?"

"Eh?" Seul-ki began panicking a little. "I'm not... I don't think so."

"Seul-ki."

"Yes?"

"Are you still angry with Gyu-hyung?" Seul-ki was quiet, and her breathing was heavy as she bit her lip. "I know you're probably still angry but what happened at the theme park wasn't hyung's fault... And I think you know about it."

Seul-ki fell quiet for a long moment. "I know... But, it's a little hard for me right now. I need time..."

Dongwoo sighed. "Don't wait until it's too late, Seul-ki." Again, she was just being quiet, weighing Dongwoo's words and couldn't help but to think that he was right. "Seul-ki, you're okay?"

"I'm okay... Um... I think maybe I can make it to the party tonight..."

Dongwoo smiled at the other end. "I hope you can really make it then. It will start at 8."

"Okay..."

"See you then."

"Dongwoo-sshi!"

"Yes?"

"Is... Sunggyu-sshi... well?"

Dongwoo smiled before sighing. "Maybe you want to see him for yourself to know that."

Sunggyu was only staring at Dongwoo who was talking with Seul-ki on the phone; his gut churning when he heard her sleepy voice over the loudspeaker. He could barely refrain himself from grabbing the phone and tell her that he missed her and that he was doing fine but not too fine since he wanted to meet her but he was afraid that Seul-ki would just hang up again like she did before. It was bad enough that he couldn't see her for days, and not being able to call her as well. The last thing he'd want was for her to completely withdraw herself away.

"She'll be there," Dongwoo said, smiling with satisfaction.

"You think?"

"She asked herself whether you'll be there. Of course she will. And she worries about you."

"It seems so... I hate to make her worry."

"Well, her worrying is a good sign that she cares about you, and you still have a chance to take her back. If she doesn't, it means hyung is in a big trouble."

"If she doesn't come tonight, I'll just go and force her to go home."

"Then she'll run away again," Dongwoo warned him. "Hyung, you know how Seul-ki is. She's like a cat. She'll approach you when she doesn't feel threatened and if you just try to grab her forcefully, she'll scratch and kick you and run away."

"Why are you comparing Seul-ki with cats?!" Sunggyu said, getting at it.

"I'm only speaking metaphorically!" Dongwoo defended himself, "This whole plan - isn't it so that Seul-ki herself would go back to hyung?"

"It is..." Sunggyu muttered to himself, admitting defeat. "But, say if she's unaffected by our plan tonight, what should we do? I can't stand it anymore... Not having her around. It feels hollow..."

"I think it'll work."

"If it doesn't, I'm dragging her back home..."

"Hyung, you said you didn't want to force her!"

"I don't want to, but what can I do? Besides, Woohyun said that women like some struggling anyway."

"I'm pretty sure that was not what he meant," Dongwoo said, sighing. "If you're just going to force her, why not do it now? Hyung can just go there and force her to go home. So why don't you?"

"Because... Seul-ki can really scratch and kick..." Sunggyu mumbled.

"She needs to realise it herself that she loves you and that she needs you. It's the only way to keep this marriage intact, hyung. You said it yourself. We can't blame her for being a little insensitive about it - she didn't grow up in the best environment." Dongwoo smiled kindly, looking at his hyung who was having a sullen look on his face.

"What if she will never realise it?"

"You need to learn to have some faith in her, hyung." Dongwoo said, standing up from the dance floor.

"Yeah, always keep the faith," Sunggyu said monotonously, before he lied down on his back, looking up at the ceiling, trying to draw Seul-ki's face in his mind. Then he whispered quietly, "I want to see you..."

Seul-ki arrived 20 minutes before the party started, but she was too timid to even approach Dongwoo's house. First she thought that arriving early would make her look overexcited, and second, although she wanted to meet him very much, there was still a huge anxiety in her heart about seeing Sunggyu again. She clenched the strings of the paper bag that she was carrying and walked off to the park. On her way there, she saw Sunggyu's apartment and was wondering if Sunggyu was home, at work or whether he was already at Dongwoo's house. As she sat at the park, she was thinking what should she says when she sees him, and outlined things that she wanted to ask and apologise for. She took out the red medium-sized teddy bear that she had bought for Dongwoo, unsure if he would like it but it was all