Jan 31, 2014

When Dongwoo saw an ambulance speeding by his van, he could feel something inside him was knotting up, making him feel sickly. Sunggyu had called him and told him that Seul-ki was missing and though he was reluctant to tell what had happened, Dongwoo managed to squeeze the information out by yelling at him, and yelling wasn't something that neither Sunggyu nor the other kids would find Dongwoo doing, and so the older man spat it out.

"I think Seul-ki saw me and Youngeun... kissing."

And Dongwoo cursing out loud too wasn't something that Sunggyu or the others had ever even heard or expect. Hurriedly, he left his dance class to his assistant and took his van and soon he was roaming around the nearby areas when Woohyun gave him a call and told him the possibilities that Seul-ki might have been on the train or on a bus and wasn't in the neighbourhood anymore. He didn't spend too much time considering things since Woohyun was literally immobilized since he didn't have a car and was in no condition to ride his bike and Sunggyu was on feet, probably shouting and screaming out for Seul-ki around the area near their apartment.

So, cursing here and there, with his hands going a little cold, he was following the ambulance as if he was in a pursuit, and he didn't think much about who was in the ambulance and where it was going. All he knew was he had to try and when the ambulance started to maneuver into some quiet neighbourhood, he was becoming restless. He slowed his van when the ambulance pulled over and two medics were flying out from the back of the car and Dongwoo could see a small crowd and they were the locals there, all bundled up in thick jackets and some, blankets. They were whispering and shaking their heads and pointing at something; their heads dyed with the red flashes of lights from the ambulance.

 He shivered when he got off his vehicle and with dragged feet, he inched closer to the crowd and since he wasn't that tall to begin with, he was tip-toeing, trying to look at what was happening. The people were unrelenting, and wouldn't budge but he somehow managed to squeeze in between, nudging people with his built arms and legs and when he saw her, he almost fell on his knees.

A medic was pumping oxygen through , and the other one was checking some monitor and Dongwoo stared; dumbfounded when he knelt down and watched with his mouth hanging when he saw that she was blue, and she wasn't moving and her hair was sticking onto her face and in her white-sheet hand, she was gripping limply a black silk but it was crumpled, and the string was loose.

Dongwoo burst into tears and screamed for her.

Sunggyu's mouth was clamped shut when he arrived at the hospital, his feet quick but his eyes were wild and despite the cold weather, he was sweating, and his throat felt parched. When he made his way towards the emergency ward, his hands slowly formed into shivering fists, and his face became paler and paler when he saw from a distant that Dongwoo was crying while swaying to and fro, standing up, and his hands were clenched together to cover his mouth but his eyes were fixed on the commotion before him.

Sunggyu didn't even make an effort to say anything to him and quickly turned to see Seul-ki on the bed, only dressed in her underwear while the doctor and nurses were trying to stabilize her and pumping out the alcohol out of her but she was not moving, and Sunggyu could feel his eyes were burning.

"Seul-ki..." He mouthed, and mindlessly, he stumbled towards the bed, and swallowed down the knot in his throat. He couldn't hear what they medical staffs were saying when an elderly nurse grabbed his shoulder and made him look at her.

"Are you her family?"

"She's my wife." Sunggyu said, effortlessly, like he was only breathing it out, and he was only looking at Seul-ki; at how her skin was pale and her eyes were closed as if she was sleeping while the nurse says something. He watched them putting her on oxygen and it made him a felt a little suffocated but he was only being quiet and his mind was in a mess. It felt a little surreal to see Seul-ki lying on the bed, a nurse was wrapping her with a blanket then, and he wondered if she was waking up soon, and he would rather have her awake and angry than seeing her unconscious and limped like that. His heart was in severe pain and it s throughout his body as his stomach started knotting up and his throat blocked and his eyes felt strained because he hadn't been blinking since he first laid his eyes on his unconscious wife.

The doctor breathed out loud once he was done monitoring and turned his attention to Sunggyu, whom the nurse had pointed out to be the husband of the patient. The doctor nonchalantly explained, "She's stable now but we need to put her under monitor and get her temperature to normal again so we're moving her to-" And Sunggyu was no longer listening as he watched the nurses pushing her cot her away, and his feet were moving automatically to reach for her and he felt his world spinning, watching her closed eyes and he began trembling again and in the ward, when the nurses were lifting her gently from the cot onto the bed, he could only watch helplessly. One of the nurses looked up at him.

"Are you her husband?"

"Yes." He didn't recognize his voice so he nodded to make sure that the nurse got her answer. The nurse only nodded and then she began removing Seul-ki's remaining clothing with the upmost care and watched them put her in the patient's gown. He was only looking at Seul-ki's face all the while, longingly.

"You might want to bring her clean underwear for her stay this few days." She said, curtly, and then the doctor came and check on all the drips for rewarming and the heartbeat monitor and then he went over to Sunggyu and told him about how she was having alcohol poisoning and developed hypothermia where she lost most of her body heat but it was lucky that she was found before it got bad and that she would wake up soon. Sunggyu was only nodding and nodding, and his head felt heavier with each nod and once the doctor had stopped explaining, he waited until everyone else had left and silently, he walked over to her bed, sat down on the chair and buried his face on the side of her bed, apologizing silently.

A hand touched his shoulder after a few minutes and he looked up to find Dongwoo, his eyes swollen but his tears had ceased.  He was looking at Seul-ki as if it was painful to do so.

"She wasn't breathing..."

"Dongwoo..."

"She was just lying there and her face was blue." Each word was clear and distinct but Dongwoo had started crying again. "And I wouldn't know what to do if she would just stay like that and not move again. I was so scared. I couldn't even hold her hand because they said it would do harm to her, and that her heart could just stop from cardiac arrest and the ambulance was shaking violently and I was scared that it might cause her shock."

Sunggyu stood up and reached out for Dongwoo, who began crying violently again. He patted his back and felt even more down. He felt a little regretful that he wasn't able to find Seul-ki but he was more than glad that Dongwoo did. What mattered was that she was safe.

Dongwoo pushed his hyung away slowly, with tears still streaming down his face. He fished out something from his pocket and handed it to Sunggyu who took it with his hand trembling.

"She was found holding this; in the playground tunnel." Dongwoo said, pronouncing each word slowly, as he sniffed, trembling. None of them said a word when the younger turned away and walked out of the ward and Sunggyu was only looking at the black silk in his hands and burying his face into Seul-ki's bed again, he began crying and trembling badly.

Myungsoo had just gotten off the phone with Dongwoo who told him that Seul-ki was at the hospital. He was still driving around but decided to pull over because he had spent almost an hour making useless rounds and so he made a call to Sunggyu who never answered his phone and so he phoned Dongwoo instead. The quiet hospital felt sickening as he strode along the corridor towards her ward and when he arrived there and saw Sunggyu by her side with his hand sprawled across her belly over the blanket with faint sobs and little shakes, he retreated away and walked to the wall outside the ward where he slid down to the floor on his heels.

His face was between his knees, and both of his hands were holding his head which was throbbing as he felt tears coming out of his eyes. He sat like this until a nurse came over to ask him whether he was alright and told him to go home but he only shrugged her off and took a moment before entering the ward again.