♔ Pabo Review ♔

My Undercover Lover: The story of a girl spy in an all boys' school 

(Reviewer:Katakatica)

♔ Title 3/5 :
The title fits the story well, but it's too long. It kind of looks like two different titles combined.

♔Description & Foreword 7/10:
The description was quite catchy, it is enough to grab the reader's attention, but I think you should have introduced at least the main characters in the foreword. Just so the reader knows who is who and how they will appear.

♔Plot 15/20 :
I like how the plot is quite original. What I didn't really understand was how the boys didn't even think of telling the police or their parents. It kind of sounds weird to me, but it does make everything interesting, since they don't want to do it.
Another thing I didn't really get was : okay, Lea hadn't been to school before, I understand, it's a nice reason for her to act all cute and lost, but couldn't the people who did her make-over, or just someone from Base 12 explain how real school works to her? Yes, it was cute when Jiyong helped her, but still, it's a bit weird. How do they expect her to blend in when she doesn't know what to do?
The last thing I'd like the point out is that while Lea had her traning since she was small, she still isn't a spy. She didn't even know about it, but I like how she didn't back down from her first mission. I do think that it's still a bit much for a first-mission-spy.
I still find the plot itself interesting, I just found these things a bit weird. (but they do make it unique^^)

♔Characters 17/20:

Ben and Lea seem nice well, especially how Lea didn't back down from her mission. And I'm really sorry about her past, is really sad.

What I didn't like in Lea was how uninformed she was at the beginning. So, did she really not notice how she was being trained? It was a bit annoying...

I kind of find the boys a bit stupid (as I explained it above) because most people would have turned to the authorities for help.But I do like how they stick together, it's cute.

Also, I like how most of the characters that turned up in the first four chaps are unique. It makes the story colorful, how they aren't too alike :D

♔Originality 13/15

Even though the 'boy dresses as girl' thing is becoming quite common in fanfictions, your fanfic was still quite original for making Lea a spy and not just a student (and giving the boys a reason to sell the drugs)

♔Flow 15/ 15


The flow is quite good, good job on that^^
♔Grammar /Spelling/Vocabulary 3/5

There weren't any problems I noticed with your spelling, but there were some small problems with your grammar. I think you should re-read the chapters when you have time, and you will notice them, I'm sure.

Your vocab was nice, but sometimes some words were used too much, maybe you should use sinonyms for them?

♔Overall Enjoyment 7/10

Honestly, I never read fanfictions like this, because I found the basic idea quite overused. And still, I liked the story itself. The plot is as original as it can be, but the things I mentionedcan make some people annoyed. But it was a really nice story, so keep the good job up^^

♔Total:80/100

♔Reviewer’s Note & Tips:

Well, all I can say as a tip is that I think you should make your foreword introduce the main characters, it is always nice to know their personalities before.
Also, if you have the time, just re-read the story, and you will find the grammar mistakes, though luckily they didn't spoil the story or anything, that's why I didn't make that part of the review too detailed^^
I hope that I didn't sound to harsh, especially when pointing out my problems with the plot. If I offended you, I'm sorry about it T.T

__Owner's Note; Pab0Panda

Thank you for requesting. Please don't forget to credit and comment after picking up.

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