***** 3 YEAR AGO*****

3 rd P.O.V

Awaking with the empty feeling of being off balance Kibum sat in bed for a while, trying to figure out why the feeling of lost was burning his chest.

Although he never did find out the cause for the uncomfortable feeling. And so after giving up he hoped out of bed and headed down stairs.

"Good morning Kibum."

His mother lovingly smiled at him as he took his seat at the breakfast table.

"Good morning."

As Kibum smelt breakfast cooking he couldn't help the affect that it had on his stomach.

"Oh,im so hungry."

"Yeah yeah yeah you always say that."

The rough voice of Kibum's father pulled Kibum out of his trance.

"Morni' dad."

"Mornin."

Kibum was relieved that everything was going smoothly. Though the feeling that he was forgetting something was still strongly with him. 

"Oh is Dae-Ho awake yet? Kibum go get Dae-Ho up for me."

Who the heck?

"You want me to get up Dae-Ho?"

"Yeah."

"Who the heck is Dae-Ho?"

Kibum replied to his mom's statement as though she had lost her mind. There was nobody living here except himself and his parents.

"I...I...I cant..t...take this....a..anymore..."

And just like that Kibum's mom broke down into a sobbing lump on the kitchen floor. Though not before Kibum's dad caught her and started to whisper reassurances in her ear.

"You know what the doctor said. It comes and goes."

"But this time he was doing so well! Its been two months and you chose now to forget?! Why cant you just remember him?!"

Kibum hadn't known what had happened or what to do. First he was enjoying breakfast with his parents and then his mom starts to break down. Blaming him for something he couldn't recall.

Pretty soon the pitiful sight just got too much for jim to handle. Backing away he whispered soft apologizes until he was out the house. Once outside he breathed in a breath of fresh air. 

"What am i supposed to remember?"

Thinking hard Kibum took his time in trying to remember just what the heck he had forgotten. As his memories scrambled around inside his overcrowded brain he became more and more confused. Feeling more ashamed than before Kibum gave up and decided that he needed to clear his mind.

Although his mom was bawling her eyes out Kibum knew that his presence would only make things worst for her and so he decided to disappear for a bit.

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*******COUPLE MONTHS LATER*******

3rd P.O.V

It had been sometime after the incident in the kitchen and still Kibum was stuck with the never ending guilt that he was letting down his parents.

Everytime he spent time with them he felt as though he was being judged. As though he wasn't good enough. But most of all he felt pitied and hated. 

Although his mother put on her best smile whenever he was around he could tell that she was really worn out. That she was breaking more and more and it was all his fault. For not being able to remember God knows what.

Then it dawned on him maybe he hadn't forgotten something but someone. And with that thought in mind Kibum felt horrible. It was just like the time after his accident. He then had forgotten....he had forgotten someone really important to him. He was sure of it.

And now things were no better. He was always plastering a smile on his face while he tried to recall the person that his heart told him he was forgetting.

Every once in a while his heart would pick up spend out of nowhere as if signaling to him that the thing he had forgotten was near. But whenever he glanced around he saw nothing that stured a hint of an emotion out of him. So after a while Kibum decided to give up and just roll with the punches.

He could continue faking it and he didn't mind if others faked it either. He just wanted this painful feeling to be gone.

He had come to this decision one day when he was walking home from school. As he was exiting school gates and rounding the corner he had bumped into some girl.

Before he even had a chance to apologize however she was already walking again, as though she hadn't even noticed the rather rough brush against her shoulder.And as Kibum watched her walk away it took him a while to process what he had heard her mumbling. Although it was under her breath Kibum could have sworn he heard her mumble Dae-Ho.

Though her mumbling was more like a chant. Soon after Kibum realized the name spilling from her lips he decided to follow. He wasn't quite sure why but he felt as though that name meant something to him. He hadn't dared get too close to the girl or even stop to ask her what she was doing because there was something about her that Kibum detested.

Though he still followed. He followed her all the way back to school. Stepping onto school campus he noticed that there were quite a few people still lingering afterschool.

The first he noticed was Taemin and then Onew, though it appeared as though they were talking to another person. Focusing back on the mysterious girl Kibum ignored that horrid feeling bubbling up into his chest from his stomach.

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Kibum P.O.V

After some time the young lady came to a stop.She suddenly turned around and faced me, eye contact fierce.

For a second i was frozen stiff. An unexplainable fear washed over me as i stared into her daring eyes. The longer our stand still lasted the louder her chanting became.

"dae-ho...dae-ho...dae-ho...Dae-ho...Dae-ho....Dae-Ho....DAE-ho....DAE-Ho....DAE-HO....DAE-HO!!!!!!!"

"you...must...die...you....must.....die.....You...Must....Die....YOU....MUST....DIE!!!!!!"

As i stared at her i knew exactly three things.

ONE: Shes crazy

TWO: Shes confused me for Dae-Ho

THREE: She knows Dae-Ho 

I wanted to rejoice that i was finally getting somewhere in my hunt for Dae-Ho, that is until i saw a pair of scissors dangling in her hand. As her chants got louder she got closer. As much as i wanted to move i couldn't.My feet were glued to the ground.

Thats when i had my first out-of-body experience. As she made contact with my tender skin, slashing it in every which way i watched as i bleed. In front of me i watched myself wither in pain.

"die...die....die...DIE....DIE....DIE...DIE!!!!!!!"

Blood covered the white hallway walls some of the warm liquid splattered onto my face. Wiping it away with my hands i looked down. My blood was so warm and red. Redder than what i would have ever believed.I could still hear her chanting in the background as well as the never ending cries and pleads.

Actually after a while i was struggling to comprehend the situation.So i took a step to my body, being brutally mortified by some beautiful crazy chick whos face twisted in a disgusting way.

With each step i took towards myself and her i had flashes of a face that looked just like mine. Though it wasn't me. I had glimpses of this person and soon a name followed along with the face.

Dae-Ho.

I had finally made it to myself and her when i came to realize that that wasn't me. I wasn't having an out-of-body experience and the one being stabbed wasn't me.

I looked back at my bloody hands and knew whos blood was on them.

With that knowledge i felt like throwing up, but thats when i knew it was over. The final stab and the final plea. She...J...Jessica had killed my Dae-Ho and i had done nothing but stood and watched

I was dirty oh so dirty, with his blood on my hands, i couldn't take it. 

"Kibum...."

I heard his frail voice breath out with his last breath before he collided soundly with the hard floor. 

"Ha...ha...ha...HAHAHAHA.....haha..hahahaha....Ahhh.....AHHHHHH!!!"

Everything faded to the backround. All the unimportant noises faded into the buzzing noise in my ears. The last thing i remember was hearing Jessicas sick laughter. 

I couldn't stand the sight or smell anymore. Dae-Ho was sprawled out on the hard floor with blood surrounding him and the walls dripped with his precious red liquid. 

Dae-Ho. I had finally remembered everything. But i didn't want to remember if it was going to hurt this much. 

The pain increased with each mintue that passed until i let the familiar darkness take me away from this sick reality.

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When i had awoke again i was surprised to find that i was in the hospital. The familiar  beeping noises of the machines mixed in with the disturbing smell that all hospitals carried with them was rather unplesant.

Upon sitting up sturdy hands grabbed my shoulders to steady me. Taking note of the feel of the hands i assumed that it was my dad. I really didn't feel like looking at him. Something told me that if i looked at him then i would regret it.

"How...how are you feeling Kibum?"

Im wasn't too sure how to answer that question. Was he asking me how i've been these pass two months? Or was there something else he was hinting at?

"Kibum?...Are you feeling okay?"

The only thing i could do was sit there.I was too afraid to speak. I felt as though i had lost my heart and i didn't know why.

"Kibum i know you'll miss him but you have to remember that its not your fault for what happend."

I was confused as my dad handed me some tissue but i decided not to question it. Still not looking at him i took the tissue from his trembling hands. Thats when i felt a wet feeling running down my cheeks. Lifting my hands up to touch the unwanted wetness i was scared when i realized that i was crying.

I had no reason to cry. Thats when my dads words played over in my mind.

Exactly who was i going to miss and what wasn't my fault? Questions were starting to spiral out of control as i weeped into the soft tissue.

My dads loving hand patted me on the back, encouraging me to cry as he too shed tears. Just what could have shaken my dad up so much? And why the hell couldn't i recall?

Im getting sick of this got damned game called life. Im sick of not remembering and then being lied to. 

Im really sick of it.

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Sorry to leave off here.

Im doing this a couple of minutes before school and so i had to rush some of it.

Dont worry though ill me my darnest to catch up and give you all the answers.

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AIERU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!>.<