I swept away the trails of tears with the sleeve of my white coat. I wasn’t ready for that. I wasn’t ready for she yelling at me like that, nor I was ready for her angry and cold voice. Moreover, I wasn’t ready for the officers to use electric shock guns on her. I never knew the officers here used those kinds of weapons in the first place.

Using electricity was a common thing when treating inmates in the past, especially for conditioning them to behave in a certain way, but they gradually became obsolete as people realized this kind of treatment was inhuman. I never knew the Asylum was still using those weapons. And the fact they didn’t even hesitate to shoot her made me angry and hurt.

Angry for this could leave major marks on the patient, not physically but psychologically. I wondered how many times Taeyeon suffered those electric shocks all those years she’s been here.

I felt my eyes clogging up some tears again.

“You alright, Doctor?” One of the officers asked me. There were five of them and they were escorting her like she was a dangerous animal. It hurt me to the bits.

My legs were weak but I tried my best to keep standing and follow her steps.

“Y-Yes.” I stuttered. I was still in shock for what have happened.

My mind was a mess wondering what I’ve could done to trigger her episode. It didn’t make any sense to me. Why she attacked me? Why she got so angry? I was about to give her gummy worms… I just wanted her to behave and did an inoffensive threat, that’s all. But apparently that made her furious.

Her head was lowered, officers Sungmin and Baekhyun were holding her by the shoulders. She stood silent as the only thing she could do for her own good was to follow the officers quietly.
My heart though was pounding so hard against my chest I was afraid someone could hear it.

As we reached the elevator, Choi Siwon pressed the button to level five. I frowned my brows to that. I thought we were going to the SHU. The SHU isn’t in the medical building.

“Hopefully Ho Sung will lock you down forever, Kim.” Lee Sungmin said it.

No. He can’t lock her forever. She needs treatment! If she stays in the SHU she won’t have sessions with me anymore. I don’t want to stop seeing her! I don’t want her to fade away in those dirty cells!

As we walked across the corridors, my heart beat faster as I was anxious for what Ho Sung would tell her. For how long he will send her to the SHU? 2 weeks? Three weeks? One month? God, please, no.

The warden greeted us as we entered his office. “You again, Kim?” Taeyeon was forced to sit on the chair across of him by the guards. He shook his head, rather disappointed. “I thought you had learned your lesson.”

Something in the way he was talking made me not like it. There was something else implied in that sentence but I just couldn’t get what it was.

His dark eyes raised up from Taeyeon to the officers and I. “What did she do this time?”

“She assaulted her doctor, Sir.” Lee Sungmin stated firmly. I gulped hard.

Ho Sung sighed. “Again?”

I frowned my brows. What did he mean again? Is that a common thing for her to do it? Does she often attack her doctors?

She kept quiet though.

“Doctor Hwang.” He called me, I blinked and cleared my throat.

“Yes, sir...”

“Are you injured by any chance?”

Emotionally yes. Physically no. “No, sir.”

“You were lucky. Once upon a time Kim choked her doctor with the handcuffs to death.”

My eyes fell to the ground as my stomach got sick. Did she killed one of her doctors? Was that Dr Young?

“I'm your new psychotherapist, Miss Kim. I'm here taking the vacancy left by Doctor Young.”

What happened to him?”

“He quit.”

“He sure did.”

Was that why he quit? He didn’t quit his job but his existence? My eyes shyly leaned towards her, trying to understand why she does those kinds of things. Why is she so unpredictable? One minute she’s okay but the other she’s killing innocent people.

I was brought back to earth when I heard Ho Sung’s voice.

“It seems like your anger issues are always in the way, Kim.” He grabbed a file behind a drawer. “Let’s keep trying stop them, okay?” Whatever he was implying I wasn’t liking one bit. Taeyeon seemed to find the floor far more interesting than the man before her. “How many pills you’re taking? Three?”

My eyes opened wide. No.

“Let’s make it four, shall we?”

“No!” I quickly said it, not caring that I was genuinely confronting the general supervisor of that place. He was my boss. He was everyone’s boss! He was the one in command of that place now that Lee Soo Man retired. Yet here I am, denying him power. “Sir… I’m sorry, but she is fine with three pills.” I tried using my most neutral polite voice.

“Well, if she was, she wouldn’t have her episodes.” He said calmly. His spectacles reflected light and it baffled me that he looked like one of those scientists you see in movies.
You know those ones greedy and cold heart who said they were always doing the right thing but it turn out that they were just being evil? I could bet my life that guy was a sadistic pig.

“Sir, with all due respect… She doesn’t need more doses.”
Hell, four pills? Three makes Taeyeon stick in bed all morning… Now four?

“Resident Kim needs her medication to behave properly, Doctor Hwang. And if that fails it, we increase its doses so she will no longer be a threat.”

“Your job… is to give them medicines so they are no longer a threat.”

I remembered Yuri’s words. No. That’s not my job. My job is not just shoving them pills when they don’t behave. My job is to understand them. To help them. Giving her pills and more pills isn’t helping at all. But I decided to held my tongue as I could be in trouble confronting the general supervisor. I just nodded. “Yes, sir.”

“Four pills for you, Kim.” Sung continued rather calm. I clenched my fists, my nails embedding to my palms. “And one week in the SHU should do well to calm you down.”

One week. Well I gotta say it went better than expected. I mean the SHU must be an awful place to stay for even a couple of days but better one week there than a whole month.

“Guards, take her to solitary confinement. She needs to be alone for a while.”

“Yes, sir!”

I couldn’t move. My legs became jelly as the officers got her up and her fiery eyes stared mine. I wanted to say sorry for whatever I said that made her angry but the words didn’t came out.

“You’re alright, Doctor Hwang?” He asked after the officers left with Taeyeon. I looked at him, still confused. “Resident Kim is very unstable. One wrong word and you are a goner.
That alone makes her one of the most dangerous inmates of the Asylum. Be careful with your words, Doctor Hwang. They might be your last in here.” He eye-smiled. Why did he just eye-smiled? “Or elsewhere for that matter.” I gulped hard.

“I’m sorry, Sir.”

“I’m pretty sure you are. Have a good day, Doctor Hwang.”

~~*~~

I didn’t have a good day or a good night whatsoever.

I’ve spent almost the whole night awaken, praying for God she was alright. She was always in my mind and the mere thought of her sleeping in that lonely dirty place was wrecking me.

There is something very wrong with me. Very twisted. I was verbally abused and physically assaulted by Kim Taeyeon yet I couldn’t stop thinking about her. I was supposed to be angry at her. But the truth is that I wasn’t.

I was hurt but not angry.

My heart always squeezes when I think of Kim Taeyeon. Maybe it is because she’s in locked away in the SHU. I like to think that if Irene was sent to the SHU I’d be feeling the same way too.

The SHU…That ing place I can not go because being completely alone is actually the main punishment. Even for introverts, a place like the SHU is hellish.

And to remember Taeyeon is in that hell for the entire week was wrecking me.

Not being able to see her was wrecking me.

What is she eating? Is she sleeping all the time? What is she doing now? How is she feeling?

I should feel glad I was alive. I should feel glad I was giving Sooyoung her macaroons as we had planned. I should feel glad Yoona was no longer angry with me… But I wasn’t. The fact was that I miss her. I miss her voice, her giggles and her silly jokes

The days at the Asylum seemed to become gloomier and longer. If I could sleep through the week and wake up only when she gets out of that place, I would have.
All those days talking go her, trying to reach her, they just made me be closer to her. The closest I ever been to a patient of my own in fact. I was so eager to understand her mind, I couldn’t care less she is one of the most dangerous residents of the Asylum. And then suddenly not having her there anymore was weird. Not having Taeyeon around for me was like Batman not having the Joker. It was an empty feeling and everything seemed misplaced and unimportant.

Yoona seemed to notice I was blue and as she had forgiven me for what happened last week with Sooyoung, she got back her usual kind self. I enjoyed that. It was really good to have a fresh and warm friendship with other doctors in such a place like this. Yoona started to invite me to have lunch with her in the refectory. She also introduced me to Seohyun and Kyuhyun, general doctors of the Asylum in charge for the all the residents’ examinations.

Seohyun was younger than me and surprisingly very prude, which in an environment like those it was very uncommon. Most of doctors and officers developed some tough skin due to dealing with inmates all the time but Seohyun had extreme respectful manners. It was odd to see yet very refreshing.

"Three." Seohyun softly spoke.

"Five." Kyuhyun raised all the fingers in his hand.

"What they are talking about?" I asked Yoona beside me. She giggled.

"They're having a bet of how many intakes the Asylum will get on Saturday."

"Intakes?"

"New residents are coming to the Asylum on Saturday.” Oh, I didn’t know that. “ The very first contact those residents have with the medical team is with either Seohyun or Kyuhyun. They do all the check ups, from blood and urine exams to electrocardiograms."

"They always have bets like this?"

"Yes. Seohyun is currently on a three winning streaks so far." She smiled gently.

"It’s not really hard to defeat Kyuhyun-oppa. He always thinks we will have more residents than usual. It’s been a while since we had five new incomes altogether." Seohyun said in her usual softly voice.

"And where do the new residents stay? How is the procedure for their diagnosis?"

Kyuhyun was the one speaking this time. "Some have already been diagnosed before being transferred. For the ones who comes to the Asylum as their first ride and don't have any psychological profiles, once we have the results from the exams, several interviews are conducted with several different doctors. After that, the inmates are placed at their correct unit."

Irene doesn’t have any behavior that could put her under the category of mental disorders yet she’s here for months and no one seems to even bother. It’s completely dangerous having a normal person amongst mentally ill people. I know Seohyun and Kyuhyun are just general doctors, they have no formation in psychology or psychiatry so it’s not really their fault but still I couldn’t stop finding that weird. It seemed somehow this Asylum stopped caring this is in the first place to treat mentally insane criminals and now is just a penitentiary mixing up normal and insane inmates. And that mix can never end up well.

"Hm, what if a resident doesn’t have any behavior issue? What if they are here by mistake?" I asked.

"No one is here by mistake, Tiffany. Every single one of the residents are criminals." Yoona gulped some water.

"I’m not talking about being criminal." I tried to explain myself as I remembered Irene's current situation. "What if a resident is a criminal but doesn’t have any mental issues?"

"They can require transfer for regular penitentiaries.” Seohyun calmly said. “Once is confirmed the resident is clear of any mental disorders, their respective doctors sign the paperwork releasing the inmate from the Asylum."

I smiled at that. It didn’t seem so hard. If Irene still keeping behaving herself around here for a while, maybe for a couple of months more, I could request her transfer.

"Do you have a patient in this situation?" Yoona asked curiously.

"I’m not entirely sure yet; I still need more sessions but so far one of my patients doesn’t seem to have any."

"Ow, that’s good, unnie. All you gotta do is request transfer for your patient. The papers usually comes after a couple of weeks."

“Good luck though.” Kyuhyun said it quite sarcastically. “Releasing an Inmate from the Asylum is like the nine-tailed fox, everyone has heard of, everyone knows of… Yet it’s just a myth.”

“What? Why?”

He raised his shoulders. “Once a resident is here, no other penitentiary would trust to have a ‘criminally insane’. It’s a stain to carry forever. So either they do their time here and are finally set free or they die and are buried here.”

“That’s horrible.” I said feeling myself uncomfortable. So does that mean Irene needs to do her time here? She arrived not long ago, will she have to stay for years to come?

“It’s the way it is. Bet my some residents might rotten here.”

“I really hope not. Howe