Pairing: Namseok
warning: alcohol, depression, and purpose no uppercase, short chapter

hoseok sat on the dorm's kitchen floor, holding the vodka bottle close as he cried into his knees, he felt worthless. 

after a few gulps of the strong drink, he was drunk, he was never good at holding alcohol. hoseok was probably the most lightweight drinker out there. his head was spinning and he felt like hurling. 

his whole body shook with his sobs, he felt disgusting. he continued to down the tall bottle of expensive vodka. 

hoseok's still crying as his phone rings, namjoon's ringtone echoing. hoseok slowly answers, trying to slow down his breathing. 

"hey hobi! we're almost back to the dorm, you feeling any better?" hoseok's breath hitched, he had told the others he wasn't feeling well and that he'd rest while they ate out. 

"i...i guess?" hoseok tried his best not to slur or have a wavy voice. "hey, what's wrong?" namjoon quietly asks, not wanting to worry the others. "nofting." he slurred again. 

"are you drunk? hoseok you never drink." namjoon worriedly states, the only times he remembered hoseok drinking was when he was really stressed or depressed. 

"m' not drunk." lie, that was a lie. both he and namjoon knew that. "alright, well we're almost back to the dorm. see you in a bit." namjoon glances at the others, yoongi was resting against seokjin and the maknae line was on their phones. 

"okaayy." hoseok draws out, hiccuping slightly. "bye hobi." namjoon hangs up. 

after the phone call, hoseok finished off the bottle of vodka, getting up to throw away the evidence. 

hoseok's legs felt boneless, like squishy paste attached to his body. his stumbled over to the trash can, tripping over himself as the glass bottle broke. 

the glass shards shattering everywhere as his tears came back as sobs. he stayed where he laid, tears streaming down his face. 

he soon felt arms pulling him up, trying to calm him down. "hoseok, shh it's okay." namjoon held the drunk boy close. 

namjoon drags hoseok to his and jungkook's shared room, laying the shorter on his bed. "nanjoom," hoseok says, his slurs causing it to come out wrong. "yeah?" namjoon sits next to hoseok. 

"i l-love yous." he says trying to be clear, making grabby hands for namjoon. "w-want namjoonie to hold me." he says, his eyes closing on him. 

namjoon stares at hoseok before he easily moves hoseok so he could lay behind him, making the older use him and his chest as a pillow. 

"mm, i love joonie~" hoseok curls to namjoon. "i love you too hoseok" namjoon whispers. 

when hoseok wakes in the morning, his head is pounding and he feels like throwing up or passing out. his eyes finally open, realizing he was in someone's arms. when hoseok looked up he almost screamed, he doesn't remember last night but he was praying he didn't say anything. 

"hey, you're awake," namjoon says. "how'd you sleep?" namjoon asks, even though he knew he didn't sleep well. 

"bad." hoseok answers, closing his eyes tightly with a groan. "i didn't happen to say anything out of the ordinary last night, right?" namjoon sighs. 

"well, unless telling me that you want me to hold you and that you love me, is ordinary then no." namjoon laughs softly, looking down at hoseok. 

"i―" before hoseok could speak, namjoon kissed him. 

"go back to sleep, seokjin hyung will bring you water and pills in a bit." namjoon instructs, shuffling a bit so he could fall asleep as well. 

"okay.. goodnight joon... i love you," hoseok mumbles, slipping in the 'i love you' wondering what namjoon would do. 

"sleep well beautiful, i love you too." namjoon replies, causing hoseok to blush and shuffle closer.