Misunderstood

            Mr. Chan has done a good job delivering papers on which Sarang impatiently waited for weeks. The adoption papers in her hands will finally allow Sarang to live freely as Kim rather than as Lee. The only thing she needed is her brother’s signature. Now if she only could talk with him alone, but it seems his girlfriend already settled into her house. Like every other morning after showering, Sarang went to kitchen. Since she has acquired the habit of drinking a glass of water in the morning, Hyungyu thought that right there they should put her board with must do daily activities and other obligations. Organization is the key of everything, he would say. Sarang would always stick important messages or post note’s on her board.

Lately, some of her reminders started disappearing and she became aware of it only when the term to fulfill obligations passes. For example, she broke a promise to visit little Alex, then she forgot to hand over her final thesis in mathematics on time. She also missed her monthly visit to the doctor as well as to buy medicines for her (ADHD) condition. In short, everything became a real mess. At first, Sarang thought she was just stressed out because of her father and the woman she met at her mother’s grave, and that’s why consequently she simply forgot to write reminders in the first place. She thought it was her fault, until she saw with her own eyes how her brother’s girlfriend tears and throws them in the trash. Yes, Sarang knew she isn’t a nice person; at least she’s not nice to her. Whenever her brother isn’t present, she would look down on Sarang, making hurtful comments about her parents, about not being able to take care of herself, about being a burden to her brother. Of course, when her brother was there, she would act like a real angel. Sarang endured everything. No, it wasn’t in her nature to stay silent when someone is trying to hurt her; actually, it was the opposite. She would fight back tooth and nail. Bus she would just stay silent, because her brother would smile at this girl. Because her brother was happy. This time thought, it was too much to let it slip.

            “I would really appreciate if you cease from touching my stuff.” Sarang said politely hoping that woman will do as asked, but she just laughed.

            “Why would I? It’s only making us a mess. It serves no one.”

            “It serves to me.”

            “Then I guess you are no one.” And she laughed one more time continuing with throwing the post notes away after reading them.

            “Why would this mess bother you? After all, this is not your house.” Sarang asked wanting to know exactly what does this woman want from her and her brother.

            “It will be one day.”

            “You are aware that this house belongs to me, right?”

            “What? You dare to talk back to me? Are you that rude? As soon as we get married, you are out of here, and all this will be mine.”

            “All you want is money? You don’t love him. Gold digger...” The words slipped from without her permission. Yes, Sarang does do things like spitting the words that first comes to her mind. That’s why she finds herself way too much in the new song of Jessie J, the one where nobody’s perfect.

            It looks like the gold digger tag pushed the right button. The ‘lady’ in question raised her hand to slap Sarang across the face, but she took hold of her wrist and out of the reflex twisted it behind her back. That’s how Hyungyu found his sister and his girlfriend. Knowing the history of Sarang’s fights back in the preteen years, and her temper he took his girlfriend’s side.

            “What the hell are you doing Sarang? Let go of her hand right away.” Sarang startled did exactly what he asked, taking a few steps away from the woman.

            “Oppa, I....”

            “Honey, thank God you are here. I don’t know what she would  do if you didn’t come on time.” The woman jumped in to prevent Sarang to say what really happened, but that didn’t stopped Sarang.

            “Oppa let me explain what happened. I didn’t attack her, I just defended myself.”

            “Sarang, she wouldn’t hurt a fly.” Hyungyu obviously was in love with this woman, looking at her like she came from heavens.

            “I didn’t said anything about flies, I’m telling you about me. I didn’t want to say anything but I obviously have to. She is sabotaging me for weeks, throwing away my notes and wiping my schedules away. I, I.... you know I can’t live without my schedules.” Unknowingly Sarang started to cry, all her worries suddenly coming out. Hyungyu glanced at his girlfriend who seemed like a puppy with sad eyes. She knew she had to play nice.

            “Honey, I didn’t know it was that important. I just wanted to clean up a bit.” Yes, it was easy for her to play all innocent when she’s in need to get what she wants. He wanted to be fair. Hyungyu was always the one for justice, maybe that’s why he studies to be attorney when he retires from military. Closing his eyes and opening them again, he stopped Sarang who was all for arguing back.

            “Sarang, she didn’t know. I promise I will explain what she needs to know.”

            “No, Hyungyu, no. You don’t understand. She’s not who you think she is. She’s after your money.” Sarang cried more silently cursing her own over emotional state.

            “Now, that’s enough Sarang.” Hyungyu said harshly. “Apologize right now and go to school. You’ll be late.”

            Yes, her brother was too much in love to see clearly, what’s happening. However, the thing that hurt Sarang the most is that her brother is slowly losing her trust. She apologizes without sincerity, looking straight into the pretty woman’s eyes promising with her own that one day she will make her confess all her misdeeds in front of Hyungyu.

*

Like many others who came from overseas to become what they did became, Amber was under great pressure. She still is. Over the years she had changed quite a lot, not physically mind you (she’s still skinny, almost flat tomboy) but emotionally, she believe she grew as a person. The constant pressure to be more girly, more not herself made her a bit depressed. There are times when she would ask herself why is she here where she is, who are the people and her, what do they want from her; questions just pop out in her head. She do get a lot of love from fans, and She is grateful to no end for that. There are people who claim to be her fans but still they would give harsh comment why doesn’t she wear make-up or why doesn’t she wear skirts or why she’s not feminine enough, and why, oh why is she acting like a boy. She wonders will they ever understand that she’s not acting. It’s just who she is, and if they don’t like her for whom she really is, then why would they like her for who she’s not?

            As she thought back to when she was still in America, where those things were normal, she lost track of time and only came back to the present when she found Ailee poking her arm softly pouting. Oh darn, Amber thought, I dazed off again. Shaking her head to clear her mind, she turned to face her one of the best girl-friends, enveloping her in her arms with a tight embrace.

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