He just abruptly hugged me while I’m my brain is still processing what he said to me just now.I’m the one who broke his heart and yet he’s giving me a second chance which I don’t think I deserve that.it’s making me even feel more guilty for what I’ve done.why did you do this?why aren’t you just get angry with me?it’ll make me..I don’t know maybe feeling guilty as charged or relieved I think.

“Why are you doing this to me Kibum?I don’t deserve it”

“Because I think everybody is deserved a second chance Amber”

“But what if I’m stupid enough and hurt you for the second time?”

“How would you know if you never tried?”

“But I-- …..”

“Let’s just start over and if I can’t make you fell in love with me then it’s no problem.we still can be friend anyway”

He sure know how to make me speechless.and made me looking at the ground feeling defeated that I can’t answer him

“I’ve forgive for what you’ve to me last time Am.but in repay I hope you take this offer”

“Let me ask you the same question again Kibum,why exactly are you doing this?”

“Because I’m not over you Am ..”

   It hit me.for the second time he’s making me speechless.after all this time he’s still in love with me?he’s really losing his mind.I made wounds to his sincere heart last time and now he’s giving me a second chance?unbelieveable

“But I-……..”

“I’ll take that as a yes for the offer” he smiled

“Alright.I’m the one who’s guilty after all”

   I can see his smile that I haven’t seen for a long time.I’m glad that I can see again.and I guess I couldn’t be more grateful to God for sending this guy to a stupid and blinded girl like me.

“I think we should get inside by now.I can see Kai secretly watching us behind the bush”

“I bet they know the truth by now”

    And we’re both right,once we get inside they act like everything is normal,they pretend laughing,talking,hold each other hand which I think is so obvious.I guess Luna told them about us but they’ll keep quiet about it.they act like nothing happen but I can tell from their awkward acting,the teasing and their glances towards me and Kibum.

“So how was the little chit chat?did you guys know each other better now ?” Minho asked

“Please stop pretending like you guys don’t know anything,it’s awkward man” He answered

“You guys all are so obvious.you should’ve see your own face haha” I’m added

   And then again they’re laughing awkwardly in denial before they finally admitted.I’m assured them all that I’m not mad and I don’t find it uncomfortable either.well I mean not all of them knew that I’m Kibum’s ex.and I haven’t told them everything actually about a possibility that we’re gonna get back together again.but now I can’t stop thinking that I’ll hurt him again,I’m afraid.but I’ll give it a shot,I mean I got a second chances when I think that I don’t deserve it

     So basically me and Kibum starting all over again.even though I’m already know him well enough.I’m trying not to be so awkward.he hasn’t changed after all.he’s still Kibum that I know,he’s still caring.sweet and warm.he would pick me up from office,we’re having lunch together,go to the cinemas,we do what normal couples do.and I can’t deny the fact that I’m feeling comfortable with him.I can see his effort to make me fall in love with him,but not in kind of forcing way.and that’s what I like about him.Today we’re supposed to go out together and he hasn’t told me where are we going yet.when he arrived he just smiling and open the door for me and put on my seatbelt

“Come on Kibum…would you tell me where are we going?”

“Nope .it won’t be a surprise if I told you”

  Alright then.there’s no use if I keep asking him.he’s so persistent.as I watch him drive he seems happy smiling and humming by himself along the road.I feel glad that I see him smiling like this cause without realizing it,I’m also smiling at him

“Here we are …” as he opened the door for me

“Well …the beach?on a day like this?”

“Yeah ..it’s pretty quiet.so you can hear the sounds of the wave better”

“Huh?how did you----“

“Lucky answer Am…come on” he just laughing

   So the surprise actually is having a little picnic on the less crowded beach listening to the sound of the wave.it’s simple,but I like it.he’s even preparing a lunchpack and snacks for me.well his food turns out pretty god but need a little improve.since it’s salty for me but I didn’t said anything to him except “I never knew you can cook” I don’t want his effort going to waste and the grin on his fade turns into a pout.after that we’re just walking along the shore bare feet.To be honest I hate it,cause it’s kinda reminds me about Kris.when I realized that I fell in love with him first.

   But,now I’m not with him.it’s Kibum,and of course everything it’s different.it was then and this is now.we talked a lot about anything but it leads to the topic what are doing after we broke up,did we have a boyfriend or girlfriend after that,and what we’ve been up to,that kind of stuff .I tell him everything,I tell him that after we broke up I’m remain single till now.since it’s still kinda hurt for me and I don’t think I’m ready to starts a new relationships again.and more likely spend my time with my family and friends.while on the other hand even though he keeps himself busy with works,he did maet a few girls but nothing really works out with them.like what I said to him,he didn’t find the “sparks” that he find in me in those girls.so that’s why he made his decisions,that he’s going to try again,if it doesn’t work out then it doesn’t really matter.it feels like a hard blow for me.

“You know..actually I met that guy again when I went home for holiday” I confessed

“What do you mean by that guy?”

“You know..my first love,which is my highschool friend which is also the one who broke my heart”

“Ohh ..did you guys met?”

“Yeah .we did,it’s was planned by my friends Luhan.I didn’t know that he invited him too.I know that he’s trying to straighten everything that got between us since we’ve been friends long enough,but it turns out pretty wrong in the end”

“How is it wrong?”

“At first we talked about normal stuff.but then you know,we talked about the sensitive topic.I found out that he was dating one of my friends to Jess.and no one tell me about it.not  even Luhan who knows everything,how I felt for him”

“Maybe he doesn’t want you to get hurt Am”

“That’s so damn classic.I found out on my own,and it hurts me deeply.and even more worst I confessed my feelings to him twice.I told him that it’s difficult for me to get over him for a past few years when he acted like he didn’t know anything.I’m even cried in front of him.but his answers was just like ‘Who says I don’t like you?I do’.and he said that he’s relationship with Jess couldn’t last longer.we’re getting close after that,like really close.but in the end he left me without explanations and he’s getting back together with Jess”

“He did that to you?what a piece of ”

“So yeah,I’m so damn stupid I left you for a guy like that.I never knew he’s that mean”

“Everybody is stupid when it comes to love.don’t be so guilty.I’d probably do the same if I were you”

“But at least I learn something from it though.”

“Which is …?”

“The person who doesn’t love me and the person who truly love me” as I looked to him and he stopped his track and smiling to me.and he hugged me again

“Well …I’m kinda grateful that you got that lessons”

    Actually I’m feeling the same way too.at least that pain made me learn who actually Kris is.his bad sides that I never he has all this time.I’m also told him that ever since that,I’d never talk to Luhan even though he’s my closest friends.and I’d never heard any news about Kris and Jess or anyone else that connect me to them.I’m glad that he did say much about it,he just said that he can understand what I’m feeling and didn’t want to intervene either and hope everything will become clear in the future.

    We still walking along the shore but now we’re holding hands.I know didn’t since when but its seems like it happens naturally.but then something caught Kibum’s eyes.and I had to see which directions his eyes looking,and it was a little kid holding a blue kite and I can tell that there’s a problem with the thread on his hands.and the next thing is I know is Kibum walking towards that kid and offering him his help.but then he also help the kid flying the kid and play along with him.seeing him so familiar with kids it’s kinda touch my heart somehow.after he’s done playing with that kid he ruffles his hair and running back to me

“Errmm …..what is it?why are you looking at me like that?”

I just smiled “Nothing ..it’s just I didn’t know that you get along with kids so well”

“Ohh ..haha well yeah I’m pretty much liked kids.they’re so likeable”

“Thats true..but you know what,I’m awkward with them.it’s not that I don’t like kids,it’s just I’m that cheerful and easily approach towards kids”

He looked a bit shocked “Really?”

“Yeah .it’s the truth”

“Well ..that’s new.but not in a bad way”

“What do you mean ?”

“At least now I can learn more about you.something that I didn’t about you before”

   After the beach we went straight back home.just like back then he would get off the car and walk me to the front door and before he turn his body around I pulled his arm …

“Hey,still remember that you learn something new about me today?I felt the same way too.and one more thing,I know it’s gonna sound kinda like out of the blue,but back then when we first slept together,the night that you took my ity,somehow it felt right and I didn’t regret that happen”

“Neither do I” as he hold on to my neck before he finally crashing my lips into his

Sorry for the pretty short chapter and I'm sorry for being such a bad author (*bows)

Please bear with me :)