As time passed,I didn’t realize that it’s been six months we’re together.well our relationship isn’t that bad.we often fight,but spend a lot of time together.when there’s problem he’s always been the one whose stand back first.no matter whose fault it is.he really is a thoughtful and patient guy i’ve ever met.but somehow it doesn’t enough me.I mean there’s a hole in my heart,and it’s still empty till even with his presence.and then it made me questioning myself.do i love him ?why I didn’t feel something that makes my heart racing?or maybe like a butterflies on my stomach everytime we kissed.I didn’t felt such a thing like that.

“Hey Vic..are you busy today ?”

“Well..kind of.what is it Am?”

“Nothing..I just miss my bestfriend.can’t I ?”

“Okaay .there’s something on your mind right?you sound so...unusual”

“Haha.is it that obvious?”

“Of course it is dummy.meet  me at our usual place 2 hours from now.I have to attend  a meeting first”

“Alright.you read my mind haha.see ya later”

“I know,i’m a genius.haha see ya~”

I prepared myself and went to that place where we usually meet.thank God I don’t have any schedules today so I can spend sometime with her.I wait for about 15 minutes,yet she haven’t arrived.so I order food for both of us.and on the perfect time she came in..

“Oh my God..I’m so sorry.I know I’m late.how long have you been waiting?”

“Nah,it’s okaay.around 15 minutes I think”

“Alright..so straight to the point,what do you want to talk about?”

“Umm.. you know i’ve been in a relationship with Kibum for about six months now.”

“Aha..wow time flies so fast..so.?”

I’m sighing “Well..in that six months I don’t think I have a deep feelings for him.like...love him.and I don’t think I really love him Vic”

“Woah..that’s so unexpected.I thought you really like him Am..what are you talking about?”

“I do like him,I do care about him.a lot.but when it comes to love.I don’t think I love him.I’m so in’ wrong Vic.I thought I can learn to love him,but I can’t ..”

“So..basically the main reason you accept his heart because you want him to replace Kris position in your heart?”

There’s a silince between us before I finally answer her question”Yes..that was the ultimate reason”

She doesn’t seems shock because of my sudden confession instead she’s say                                  

“You know Am..I can’t say whether what you do to him is right or wrong.I can understand that you trying to move on,trying to start it all over again,but what about him?I’m sure he must be feeling so dissapointed  and hurt like he’s just your painkiller for a moment.it’s okay if you feel that all of this is so complicated, but next time make sure you’re completely ready when you’re going to let someone enter your heart”

Now I’m speechless,she was right at that time I wasn’t ready.I shouldn’t do that to him,I hurt him slowly all this time,pretend that I loved him.I do,but not in that way.now it’s becoming a mess,I’m so in’ stupid I should’ve think about it that time .now what I’m gonna do ?

“I’m so in’ stupid Vic.what I did to him,it’s  doesn’t make me a better person from Kris “

“People make mistakes Am.and try to learn from it.It’s all in your hands,you’re the one who’s in relationship with him.and this time, you REALLY  need to think carefully.you don’t want to make the same mistakes aren’t you?”

“Of course I won’t” I made  a big  sigh.while Vic trying to calm me and patting my shoulder saying that it’s going to be okay ..or not

I’m happy that everything went well these past six months.we’re like another normal couple we spend a lot of time together,communicate almost every day.I can’t describe how grateful and happy I am.I’m with someone that I truly love.but....unfortunely this happiness doesn’t last that long.I can feel that she slowly changing..did she get bored of me?did I do something wrong?.but she said evertyhing is fine everytime I asked that kind of question.I feel like there’s something off but maybe that is just a feeling that can be wrong...but what if ...

“Hey Kibum..are you home yet ?”

“Not yet..i’m on my way now.what is it babe?”

“Well..can we talk about something?I’ll come to your place”

“It’s sounds  so serious,can we just talk through  the phone?”

“It would be better if we talk in person”

“Alright then..i’ll be there in twenty minutes”

“Okay..i’m also on my way to your apartment”

“I’ll see you there..”

After twenty minutes,I’m arrived at my apartment.and I saw her arrived earlier than I did,and she’s waiting in front of my door.looking down to her feet and playing with her fingers.did something bad happen?why did she look so.... anxious?

“Hey Am...how long have been waiting ?”

“Not too long.a couple minutes maybe?I just got here too”

“Ohh ..okay,let’s get inside”

We’re inside of my apartment now,sitting on the couch with a glass of water in front of us.there’s a tension between us,and full of silence.she just sittin’ there looking down and clasped her fingers together..what is she trying to say?

“So..what do you want to talk about?” I broke the silence first

“First....I’m really sorry Kibum.and....you’re not gonna like what I’m about to say”

“Why wouldn’t  I ?”

“I wanna broke up with you..”

“You...WHAT ?!”

“I’m terribly sorry Kibum..I’m  so sorry “

“Did I do something wrong?why would you asking for a broke up Am?I thought everything was fine and we’re happy “

“We were...you didn’t do anything wrong.being with you it’s one of my happiest moments in my life.but,I’m...you know Kibum,you deserve someone better than me.and I didn’t mean to hurt you like this”

“Then why you want to break up with me Am?!”

“It’s just...you deserve someone better than me.someone who can loves you better than I did “

“What the hell kind of reason is that?!”

Now I’m starting to raise my voice in front of her which I never did,till now.did she get bored of me ?what kind of reason is that.that doesn’t make sense to me.what’s gotten into her?oh God..she just sit there quitely without saying anything and looking down to the floor .

“FINE!i’m not gonna argue with you and i’m not gonna force you to do decide something that you didn’t want to.whatever Am i can’t think straight right now ....this is the end then.goodbye.

And with that she got up from the couch and walking towards me,held my my hand,and I can see she started tearing up and she said..

“I’m sorry Kibum.thanks for everything,you’re giving asuch wonderful memories.I didn’t mean to hurt you.you better off without me.goodbye...”

 I'm so sorry for the late update(again)and it's short chapter..i'm pretty busy so sometimes I forgot.but in still on my holidayso,when I have a time I'll update this story as soon as I can.

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