Kyungsoo didn't knew why but here he was again in front of Jongin's hospital room,maybe love makes him stupid or think bad but he came,Kyungsoo took a big breath opening the door.He expected to find Jongin in his bed but the younger was gone,did Jongin got discharge?

Kyungsoo left the room looking around,he was sure that Jongin was not gone,he slowly walked up the roof hoping to find him there.

Kyungsoo opened the gray metal door feeling the fresh air blowing, this reminds him of school,when he was alone,when he was looking at Jongin and his friends from up there,dreaming to talk with him,to look in his eyes and he got everything that he wanted,kiss him,hold him,love him,but for what?

Kyungsoo came to the edge looking down,love is strange,he got that now,love can make you go crazy,to lose yourself,to cry to laugh to suffer to feel special, he felt all of that next to Jongin,even if he hated him for wat he did is like Jongin said,they were kids back then,Jongin can love him now again,he can make him fall for him more hard but for what? To feel his love over him again? To feel alive again? To feel his arms around his waist and his cheesy words in his ear telling him ,,I love only you forever!'' Yes he wants all of that but he won't make Jongin remember,if fate wants them together,then so be it,if not Taemin will always be next to him,no?Yes he was selfish for using Taemin but he really likes the younger,Kyungsoo knows that Taemin loves him and maybe it was more easy for them to meet in the first place but then Sehun woldn't be born now.

Kyungsoo closed his eyes smiling,yes eveything is for a reason,he meet Jongin for a reason,he came back to his life for a reason he lost his memory for the same reason,the one that he doesn't know yet.

-,Don't jump!'Kyungsoo jerked a little making him come back to reality.

-,Please,think about your baby!' Kyungsoo turned seeing Jongin looking worried at him,so he was here all the time.

-,Don't worry Jongin,I won't jump,I just got lost in space.' Jongin nodeed still looking worried at him.

-,What are you doing here Jongin? I've been looking for you.' Kyungsoo smiled at him showing him a lunch box.

-, I made you lunch and dinner?I hope you like it.' Jongin smiled back at him seeing the food.

They both sat down on the edge,Jongin started to eat smiling more brith when he felt the good taste of the food.

-,Wow!This is really daeback!You made all of this?!'Kyungsoo was happy that Jongin still loves his food even now.

-,Yes I like cooking,you still didn't answer me,what are you doing up here?' Jongin stop eating looking out lost.

-,I hoped that I will remember something,what kind of person I am, but nothing,my mind is blank,they say that I won't get my memory back soon, that scares me.' Kyungsoo got sad as well,that means he won't remember their happy memories,Kyungsoo is a lost memory now,nothing but a bad dream.

-, Don't worry Jongin,you will remember one day.' He faked a smile that made Jongin to look down.

-,But what if I forgot something important,or someone,I don't know about love or hate,what if someone will suffer because of me?' Kyungsoo wanted to tell him that yes he is suffering now,that love means pain and lonelinesss,but he laugh instead.

-,Aigoo! You will love Jongin,don't worry about love,the ladies really like you,you're handsome,nice,carring,trust me,hyung knows.' Jongin's eyes were glancing at him,trying to understand everything, he saw the older his belly remembering that he was pregnand.

-,Who is the father?'Kyungsoo stopped looking down at his belly smiling.

-,He is gone,he left me this present and left.' Jongin felt the pain words making his heart to ach.

-,Do you love him? Would he ever come back to you? What kind of person leaves you like this? ' Jongin was angry,how can someone leave a person pregnand and run away?

-, Yes I love him, he is my everything, but I won't wait for him,I'm trying to be happy alone, for some time that worked but now? I don't know what to do,I just fight every day for a better future,I have Sehun that will always remember me of him and now this new baby,they make me happy but not completly.'Jongin had the urge to hug him,he wanted to tell him that everything will be okay but how? He is a mess as well,his whole life is blank,hollow,but he feels pity for the shorter.Kyungsoo saw his lost and worried eyes,this was a different Jongin and it was more better to stay like this,he told the truth, he won't wait for Jongin but if the younger will love him again then he will say yes to a new beginning to a new life,the way it should have been from the start.

-,I hope you'll be happy hyung.' Kyungsoo nodded his head thinking at the same thing.

-,I better go now,Sehun will be worried but I will come tomorrow,I need to do a ultrasound to see the baby.' 

-,Hm hyung can I come with you tomorrow?' Kyungsoo was taken aback.

-,W-why Jongin?' 

-,If the father won't be there,I wanna hold your arm and be there for you.'Blame it on his hormones or his one stupidity but he started to tear,he always wanted Jongin next to him,to hold his hand and be happy together.

-,H-hyung ...did I say something wrong? I'm sorry if I did,please don't cry.' Jongin moves hugging Kyungsoo so tight feeling his belly.The older hugges Jongin back hiding his face on his chest.

This was everything he needed now,a tight hug from the man he loves from the father of his babies but the stange thing is that he feels the love from Jongin even now,he hugs him for real,the same way he always hugged him,he wanted to belive that Jongin still loves him but how?Jongin patted his head trying to make him feel better.Kyungsoo let go of him wipping his tears feeling guilty for making him woried.

-,You didn't say anything wrong,don't worry,my hormons are all over the place,I cry and laugh for no reason so don't worry about me.'Jongin nodded still worried for the shorter.

-,Okay hyung but stop crying,it makes me feel bad about seeing you like this,doesn't they say that the baby feels everything that you feel?So if you're upset the baby will be upset as well.' Kyungsoo wanted to jump on him and kiss the hell off him,this Jongin was more innocent,more like a kid but he likes him,old or new Jongin he will always love him.

-,Thank you Jongin.' Kyungsoo said trying to stand up.

-,For what hyung?' Jongin asked helping him to stand up,the belly made him feel fat now.

Kyungsoo smiles looking right on those brown orbs that glanced back at him.

-,For being alive.' Jongin tilled his head pouting a litlle.

-,Yah!Hyung,that sounds wrong,but I'm happy for being alive as well.' 

-,I'm going now but see you tomorrow.' Kyungsoo waved to Jongin leaving with heavy steps back home.

Jongin stood in place looking down at his hands.Who is he?Who is Kyungsoo and why does his heart beats so fast for him?Why would someone run leaving him pregnant?What kind of men can do that?He needs to remember because living like this makes him angry.Jongin left the rooftop going back to his room.

Kyungsoo drived home smiling,seeing Jongin today made him happy,he run all this time for nothing,if he accepter Jongin back them when Luhan told him to come back,nothing from this would happen but now was to late to look back,the damage was done,he just need to belive that everything will be fine in the end.

-,Hyung you're home! Please make Sehun stop crying!' Luhan was with tears in his big eyes coming to him scared.

-,What happened Lu?Where is Taemin and Baekhyun?!' Kyungsoo went to the livingroom where Sehun was crying on the floor.

-,They left for some bussines and they left me with Sehun,we were playing when he started to frown and be mean,I don't know what happened with him.' Kyungsoo pittied Luhan because he was so scared.Sehun was more braty now,especially when Taemin always does everything he wants,he really needs to talk this with the younger.

-,Sweetei? What happened?Why are you crying?' Kyungsoo bend over placing a hand over Sehin's head.

Hearing his mother voice Sehin jumped in his arms cring more louder.

-,O-omma I miss Kai appa!When is he coming back?!H-he made a promise with Sehunnie,I wanna see Kai appa!!' Kyungsoo glanced up at Luhan that had the same look like him.

- Sehunnie,omma promise you that you will see Kai appa again,but I know you're smart and that you understand me,Kai appa won't stay with us sweetei,he will go back to Seoul making his one family,he will come to see us but that is all.Sehunnie you need to be a good big brother for your doungsaeng okay?Omma needs you know to be good.'Kyungsoo wiped the tears from his baby face placing a kiss over his forehead.

Sehun knew what his omma was saying so he nodded his head hugging his neck tight.

-,Sehunnie sowwy omma.' Kyungsoo smiled ruffing his hair.

-,Now go and apologize to Lu hyung because you made him cry as well and you know how much Luhan loves you.' Sehun looked with his big eyes at Luhan that was still with tears on his cheek.Sehun stood up running to his hyung hugging his leg.

-,Lulu hyung,Sehunnie loves you...thissss much...!!! ' Sehun showed with his little hand how much he loves his hyung.

Luhan started to laugh starting to tickle the little boy,Kyungsoo smiled seeing that everyting is okay now,he wanted to stand up when he felt a little move.

Luhan saw his face making him worried.

-,Hyung! What happened?' Kyungsoo sat down on the sofa feeling the move again.

-,The baby moved,is the first time!'Luhan let Sehun down going to Kyungsoo enthusiastic.

-,Hyung can I feel it?Baek told me last time when Sehun moved that is really daeback!' Sehun left the room running to his room leaving them alone.

-,Hahaha I remember Baek last time,he was so happy felling Sehun moving that he tear.'Kyungsoo smiled remembering when he felt Sehun moving inside his belly.

-,So hyung can I feel it?' Kyungsoo nodded taking Luhan's hand putting it on his belly.Luhan waited to feel it and there it was,a little bump on his palm,everything was so new to him,he smiled thinking how lucky is Kyungsoo to have another baby.

Kyungsoo saw Luhan's sad glance,something told him that Luhan was hiding something.

-,Lu what happened?You're usually happy but this days I see you more upset and Baek as well,did you guys had a fight or somethin?' Luhan took his hand away moving his eyes down.

-,Lu you can trust me,if Baekhyung hurt you just tell me,I will kick his .'Kyungsoo was sure that Luhan will tell him that everything is fine but hearing a sob and seeing tears on his angelic face made the older to think again.

Luhan was always the inoccent one,the only one that belives in happy endings,that always a pillar for his brother and everyone else,what happened now that made Luhan to share tears.

-,H-hyung,Baek didn't do a-anything,he....he asked me to marry him!'Luhan broke down crying leaving Kyungsoo open mouthed.

-,What?! When?! Why are you crying?! Luhan what did you told him?!' 

-,I-I told him that I don't know!I love him hyung,more than anything,he makes me happy,he makes me feel alive but what do I give to him?I can't give him a true family or babies! I'm just me! I don't know what to do or think!' Kyungsoo knew now what Luhan mean but the younger was thinking wrong.

-,Look at me Lu.' Luhan puffy and red eyes moved up seeing Kyungsoo smiling.

-,You're the most idiot person alive,Baekhyung loves you so much,he cried so much in America after you,I did cry for Jongin but he did as well for you,all that he wanted was to come back and hug you,yes he is still a kid but ne knows what he wants and that is you stupid,and about babies you can always adopt,not all guys can get pregnant like me,or if anyone got pregnant,Luhan you think to much about others and never about you,be happy don't get like me.'Kyungsoo placed a hand over his wet cheek smiling at him.

-,THANK YOU HYUNG!!!'Luhan jumped on him hugging the older tight,Kyungsoo was right,he was thinking to much,Baekhyun really loves him like before then why did he got scared?

-,Did I miss something?' Kyungsoo and Luhan looked at the door seeing Baekhyun looking puzzled at them.

-,Baekie you're finely home!' Luhan stood up running to his lover smashing their lips together,Baekhyun got surprised at first but he gladly kissed back.

Luhan let go of Baekhyun smiling at him.He made a decision now after Kyungsoo talked with him.

-,This is a nice way to come home but what happened?Why did you cry?' Baekhyun glanced more better at Luhan's red eyes his cheek.

-,Baek,Soo hyung,I know that you love me as a lover and as a good friend and I love you the same,yes maybe I was thinking to much but I guess you're right hyung,I'm stupid but Baekhyun.' Luhan turned to his lover blushing.

-,Baek yes I wanna marry you because I love you like crazy!' Baekhyung blinked his eyes but when he got what Luhan meant he pulled him in a tight hug crying with happines.

-,I can't belive this!I love you!I love you!Thank you!' Luhan hugged him as well happy that he said yes after all.

Kyungsoo smiled seeing them so happy,Luhan and his brother deserve to be happy,Baekhyun looked at his brother muttering a thank you because he know that he helped.

-,Congratulations you too,be happy and Luhan stop thinking to much because you will end up like me.' Kyungsoo stood up hugging them,telling them again congratulations.

-,I'm going up now,I don't feel that good,the baby is still moving like crazy,I think he or she is happy.' Baekhyun's eyes got bigger.

-,What?! It moved and I was gone?! I hate it!' Baekhyun started to sulk amusing Kyungsoo and Luhan.

-,I'm sorry Baek,next time,see you guys later.' Kyungsoo left the room letting the couple to enjoy their happiness.

Kyungsoo was tired,the baby makes him sleep all the time,with Sehun was different he was eating all the time,but now he wasn't that hungry just sleppy and nostalgic,the older got to his room sitting down on his bed remembering his conversation with Jongin from today,how much he wished now to feel Jongin again.

Is funny,he wanted Jongin to leave to disappear from his life and now he got that,Jongin doesn't remember him,Kyungsoo stoked his belly smiling.

-,Sweetei,everything will be okay,omma and Sehun will love you so much and I'm sorry from now that you're daddy will be gone.I love you sweetei,be here soon.' New hot tears started to fall down his cheek.

-,Omma needs you to be here and love me and make me forget.' Kyungsoo cried again thinking how stupid he is now.Crying over something he wanted.His eyes got heavy and soon he was in dream land.

-,Soo wake up,dinner is ready.' Kyungsoo opened his eyes seeing Taemin's smiling face looking at him,some dry tears were still on his cheek but Taemin didn't want to ask him why he cried because he knew why.

-,What time is it?Did Sehun eat?' Kyungsoo stood up in his rubbing his tired eyes.

-,Don't worry about him Soo,he did eat and now Luhan and Baek are giving hin a bath,if you're tired you can sleep more.' 

-,I feel like a bad mom these days,I don't spend that much time with Sehun and Baek will leave soo ,I need to do something Taemin,I feel like going crazy with Jongin and the baby.'Taemin got in bed with him pulling the older to his chest.

-,Soo I don't know how you feel but I'm always next to you.' Kyungsoo snuggled to his chest nodding his head.

-,Thank you!' That was the only thing he could say now,thank you for keeping him alive.

-,I will stay here and sleep with you but after you will eat something,you need to take care of the baby.Now stay here,I will be back.' Taemin left the room coming back with his dinner,Kyungsoo was happy because he was hungry.

After he finish eating he and Taemin got back to bed not talking about anything,they just stood there hugging each other thinking about the future.

The next day Kyungsoo went to the hospital,his heart started to beat faster getting more close to Jongin's room,he promise yesterday to come with him and here he was again before his room,Kyungsoo knocked at his door going in after he heard a yes.

Jongin was all dressed up smiling at him.

-,Hyung you're here!Guess what?!I can leave now.' Kyungsoo nodded muttering an ,,Oh''.

-,Let's go hyung,I really wanna see you're baby!' Jongin went to his hyung pulling him out of the room.

Kyungsoo looked at their hands,how warm was his hand over his cold ones.Jongin always had warm hands that made him melt,every time he was holding his hand back then he felt alive and warm as well.

-,Hyung we're here!' Kyungsoo looked at Jongin puzzled.

-,You really need to stop spacing out,is not good.' The older blinked his eyes seeing the door where he should be,Jongin was right he really need to stop doing this because latelly he is spacing out all the time.

-,Let's go inside!' Jongin knocked at the door,going in pulling Kyungsoo with him as well.

-,Oh Mr.Do,happy to see you here,take a sit down and lift you shirt up.' Kyungsoo bowed to the nice lady that helped him until now.

Kyungsoo sat down on the bed lifting his shirt up exposing his belly,Jongin was looking at him smiling like a little kid.

-,Who is this Kyungsoo? A friend or the father?!' Kyungsoo glanced at the lady with big eyes.

-,N-no,he ...he is ...'

-,Yes,I will be the father until his real father will come back.' Kyungsoo was lost of works.Jongin said what?!

-,Oh what a nice young kid you are sweetei,now let's see what we got here.' Jongin sat next to Kyungsoo tacking his hand looking at the monitor,even if he didn't understand anything he was curious.

-,The baby is really shy,but here we have his little hand,Kyungsoo look he is smiling at you.' Kyungsoo looked as well tearing when he saw his baby face.There he was again,his little angel was smiling back at him.He felt how Jongin hold his hand more tight,Kyungsoo looked at him seeing his tears running down his cheek.This was different from last time when Taemin was with him,Jongin was here crying for him,crying for his baby.

-,Darling you're going to have a boy again,until now everything is good.' Kyungsoo was upset because he really wanna have a girl but who cares? He will have a boy again and Sehun will be so happy to know he's a hyung.

Kyungsoo and Jongin bowed taking their good byes from the lady,they were walking down the park in silence.

-,Thank you Jongin for coming with me.' Kyungsoo was the first to speak.

-,Is okay hyung,I was really excited to be there with you,seeing the little guy was really daeback!'

-,How are you feeling Jongin?' Jongin and Kyungsoo sat down on a bench eating an ice cream that Jongin got for them.

-,Hmm the same?Well I remember my job and what I can do but the rest is a blur,I guess is good that I remember something no?' 

-,Yes I think is good,you can start working again.'

-,My dad called me and I will leave back to Seoul tomorrow.' Kyungsoo stoped eating his ice cream.

-,Really?Is good,you're friends will be happy to see you.' 

-,I think so?But I don't wanna leave now,I like sitting like this with you.' Kyungsoo heart was breaking with every word that Jongin was saying.

-,Hyung,I know that we were friends because I can feel it and I will miss you,but you can always come to Seoul if the baby father won't come back,you can stay with me!' Kyungsoo didn't want to see him leave,not now or ever.

-,Sure Jongin,I will come and visit,let's go home until tomorrow.'Stay with me and never leave me again,that was Kyungsoo's mind screaming.

-,Okay hyung let's go,you must be hungry,I'm sure you're hungry!'Jongin took his hand again going home.

Baekhyun,Luhan and Taemun were happy to see Jongin okay,they took dinner telling Jongin what a good architect he is,Kyungsoo felt happy seeing all of them talking like a family,for some time he felt happy seeing Jongin here,Sehun was hugging his neck giggling until he felt asleep in his arms.

-,I better go and put Sehun to bed now.' Jongin stood up with Sehun sleeping quetly.

-,Let me show you his room.' Kyungsoo went up with Jongin showing him Sehun's room.

Jongin placed Sehun on his bed kissing his forehead.

-,Sweet dreams Sehunnie.' Jongin and Kyungsoo left the room after he wa sure that Sehun was sleeping confortable in his bed.

Kyungsoo wanted to go back down when he felt Jongin pulling his hand making him to turn.

Jongin was looking right into his eyes making him to blush.

-,Hyung,I don't know why but I wanna stay here with you,to take care of you to protect you and Sehun and the baby,why do I feel like this?Is it wrong?I'm doing something wrong?' Kyungsoo wanted to yell ,,no you're not doing anything wrong because you love only me.''

-,You're not doing anything wrong Jongin but you need to get you're memory back and I think back home will help you more than saying here.' Jongin let him go looking down.

-,I think you're right hyung,I better go and sleep now,my head still hurts.'

-,Go sleep,I will tell the others that you're tired don't worry,good night.' 

-,Good night hyung,see you tomorrow.' Kyungsoo smiled nodding his head.

Yes tomorrow,but when the next day came he saw his dad car pulling in front of the house,he didn't left the room,he couln't say good bye to Jongin,he didn't wanna see his face now because he will broke down crying.

Jongin wanted to say good bye but the older didn't left his room,maybe was still sleeping or he was sick,Jongin took good by from Taemin leaving home,but what was home for him?He looked once again at the window hoping to come back again.

This was it,Jongin left again like he left last time,why is his life so hard?Why always him?Kyungsoo felt how two hands hugged his middle,it was Taemin.

-,Soo you can cry now because I know how you feel,I won't say that everything will be okay because I don't know but fight,you need to.' Hot new tears left his eyes nodding his head.

-,Thank you for being here Taemin,thank you.'

-,You're always welcome Soo,I love you.' Kyungsoo closed his eyes sitting there with Taemin thinking about what will happen.

So sorry for every mistake,I know my english is not good,I will write this in my one way,I know i'm.not good but love it the way it is.

Is a really long chapter and more will come^^ thank u for liking my story ...enjoy until next time and I promise it will be better than this>.<