Chapter 35

Sipping his third glass of wine at the corner of the famous bar at the paradise hotel, Yunho remembered the first time he met Yuri. His mind was wandering when they met two years ago. It happened there, in this place, when his friend’s girlfriend, Hayoung, was having her birthday party. He was smoking cigarette & drinking his wine on the same table at the same corner when he spotted her entering the bar with her friend whom later he knew called Tiffany. With her simple, yet stunning appearance, she captured his eyes. Her beautiful eyes, her long lashes, her perfect skin, her long hair & soft lips, he could still remember them all. She had made his heart beat erratically that night, especially when she smiled prettily with her sparkling eyes.

He remembered how he put her as a bet for his reputation as a famous playboy against his friends. When she refused to talk to him, he felt anger burning inside his heart. Which girl on this earth could refuse his charms? She was so arrogant, snobbish & didn’t even look at him! However, she agreed to dance with him gracefully for one song. He smiled, recalling their dance that night. When she refused to continue their dance & gave him a sour face, he felt humiliated. He, Jung Yunho, the most eligible bachelor in Seoul had to swallow the humiliation from a common girl liked Kwon Yuri. He made a short decision to get her. After swallowing one for himself to brave his coward heart which was screaming loudly to remind his mind not to hurt her, he drugged her.

He closed his eyes as he felt pain stabbing his heart again, “Oh, god. What have I done in the past?” He said silently. He raked his fingers to mess his hair. He sipped his drink again. He couldn’t remember what exactly happened after he went to her room. This fact made him frustrated. The drug had made him lose his control & consciousness at the same time. By the time he sobered up from the drug, he saw her beneath him, with tears on her pale face. He saw tears on her lashes, saw which was bruised up & swollen from his harsh kisses. He looked at her arms, at his fingers gripping onto her flesh tightly. He saw her beautiful face showing a painful expression that he would never forget for the rest of his life. When he heard her loud scream, followed by a loud bang of the hotel room door to force it opened, he quickly covered her body with the blanket before covering himself.

“I must have done something horrible that night. I wish I could know what exactly I was doing to her. Please god, don’t let her remember the pain on that night.” He prayed silently, to himself. He couldn’t believe himself that he was a .

Yunho drank his wine again, feeling the loneliness he had never felt in his whole life. His black pearl princess was gone forever & he had to spend his whole life by himself. His heart felt like it was stabbed as he imagined his Yuri carrying Yoongi’s baby, not Chunghee. He couldn’t accept it. He couldn’t believe it that she was out of his life forever. He would never see her beautiful smile or hear her laughter when he or feel the sweetness of her lips when he kissed her or the caress of her caring glance.

He sat back on his chair, still recalling his life with Yuri during the past two years. The anger, hatred & disgusts look from her face along with her harsh words flashed across his mind.

*Flashback*

“I won’t forgive you for the rest of my life. Now, get out of my sight”

“Why do I have to waste my time talking to a bastard like you?! It’s enough. Enough. Leave me alone.”

“For several times already, I’m telling you. I won’t forgive you. Do you understand plain english? Oh, god.”

“I will forgive you as long as you get out of my life. Do you hear me? Get out of my life & go to hell or wherever you want to go to & I hope I will never set eyes on you again!”

“We aren’t related to each other. We are two completely different person without any string attached.”

“I don’t know what I should do. This baby had destroyed my life but I don’t have a heart to destroy its life.”

*End of Flashback*

He let out a big sigh as he remembered the moments of their early meetings. That was when Yuri was so angry with him, looking at him in disgusts. Then he recalled their sweet moments & smiled to himself.

*Flashback*

Yuri moved closer to him as he stared at her in puzzle. She muttered softly, “Happy birthday, Yunho Oppa.” His eyes suddenly gleamed with tears, “Thank you, Yul. This is the first time you said my name.”

“You look marvelous, Yul.” He said, when they came back from the church on Christmas Eve.

“Fat like a pig?” She asked quickly, with a teasing smile on her face.

“Nope. You’re sophisticated.” He said in admiration, “&...& I’ve always thought that you have incredibly enchanting & y eyes.”

She laughed breathlessly at the absurdity of that remark, “How can anyone have y eyes, Oppa? You’re so silly.” She raised her hand, hitting him playfully.

He stared at her with love & tenderness in his eyes. He placed his arm around her waist carefully. He leaned forward. Gently, softly, he kissed her smooth cheeks, forehead & then brushed his lips against hers lightly. Her lips were soft, full of sweetness. He groaned inside.

She closed her eyes & circled her hands around his neck. Feeling her reaction, he deepened the kiss. They kissed passionately as they indulged into a pool of emotion. Yunho had forgotten that he didn’t plan to kiss her passionately like they were doing now.

“It’s only a false alarm. Dr. Park said that the baby insists to see the world before its time but he didn’t allow it so he pushed the baby back to its world. So, he’s still sleeping in my stomach until the time comes.” She said to him, with an innocent look.

“Really? He pushed the baby back into your stomach?” Yunho asked bewilderedly, not catching her light joke. His eyes stared at her with puzzlement.

“You look silly when your expression is like that, Oppa.”

“Do I?”

“Just kidding, Oppa. Just kidding.”

“What do you mean?”

“It’s impossible to push the baby back. You should know it, silly. Oh, god.” She punched his arm playfully. She continued laughing.

“Alright, alright. It’s a stupid question! How silly I am.” He said, between his laughter. He smiled, trying not to look too stupid! He grabbed her hand & bent down quickly to brush a stolen kiss across her cheek.

“I found a name for him. It’s not a common name actually but I like that. Chunghee. Chunghee Jung.”

*End of Flashback*

Yunho opened his wallet, looking at her beautiful face smiling at him next to Chunghee’s baby picture. As awful as his heartache was now, his life had gone through an ironical way. He was rich, educated, a successful businessman & good-looking, yet such a failure in his love life. He could get any girl he wanted except one person he loved the most, his true love, Kwon Yuri. Life was ironic. He clenched his fist tightly.

*Flashback*

“Why are you staring at me?” She asked him in puzzlement.

“Because you’re too beautiful to be true.”

“Sweet talker. I don’t believe you.”

She was blushing. Her face was red as a beetroot. She lowered her face, avoiding his teasing look. He continued to laugh but she didn’t fight him back as usual.

“What?” Yuri couldn’t speak as she looked around her room which was filled with a huge number of fresh red roses. Her eyes widened as she couldn’t believe what she saw. was opened. She brought her hands up to cover but kept saying, “Oh my god. This is so.” Then she turned to looked at him who was watching her with a bright smile. She suddenly ran to his embrace & hugged him tightly.

“What are doing, Oppa? What are you doing?” She asked, with a trembling voice, her beautiful eyes shimmering with tears.

“I didn’t do something wrong, right? I only sent flowers to a beautiful girl to say happy super late birthday since I wasn’t here last year.” He said lightly, chuckling. He enveloped her in his embrace.

Yuri pulled away from his embrace & looked at his dark brown eyes closely. Then she punched his chest playfully.

“Sing again, Oppa.”

He blushed in embarrassment, “I can’t sing.”

“Liar.”

“How many times do I have to tell you that I can’t sing?” He said, with a laugh in his voice.

“I heard you singing to Chun.”

He sighed but the smile was still on his handsome face, “Alright. I promise to sing for you but not now. I have to prepare myself & the most important part is that I have to fight my fear of singing in front of anyone except myself.”

“Note taken. I’m waiting for your promise.” She said lightly.

“It’s beautiful. I like autumn.” She answered, staring in admiration at the night view of Korea.

“Autumn is my favorite season, too. I always dream to have my wedding in autumn. I hope it will come true.” He said firmly, hoping his dream would come true.

“I can only tell your love life will not run smoothly. It seems bitterness will be around you almost all the time but you can have your happiness if someone who loved you deeply is willing to let you go, otherwise, you will be suffering for the rest of your life.” The voice of a fortune teller lady was soft, yet firm.

*End of Flashback*

His heart slammed against his ribs. It really hurts. He drew in a deep breath. Their lovely moments & painful times were their precious memories. He stared at the empty wine glass on his right hand. When he was about to pour more wine from its bottle, a hand stopped him. He lifted his head up & saw his best friend, Jaejoong, standing in front of his table. He groaned.

“I know I could find you here, Yun.”

He smiled bitterly & pushed Jaejoong’s hands away lightly, “Leave me alone. I want to be alone tonight.” Jaejoong shook his head & said firmly, “No. You have to stop it. Look, what have you done? Are you trying to get drunk?”

Yunho didn’t listen to Jaejoong’s words & took the bottle to fill his glass, “It’s none of your business.”

Jaejoong sighed deeply. He stared at his best friend troubled face. Jung Yunho looked horrible. He sat down in front of him & said softly, “Why do you have to torture yourself? It’s fate, Yun. Both of you aren’t destine to be together. You let her go & it’s your decision but why do you continue to torture yourself? You even sit here at the same place, table & corner when you met her for the first time.”

Yunho stared at Jaejoong with his misty eyes. Why did he bring the topic back up when he tried so hard to forget her? Clearing his throat, he said bitterly, “Even though time has passed away, I just can’t get her off of my mind. The courage to show that I let her go is nonsense, Jae. Nonsense. I can’t lose her, that’s what I feel when I realize that I can’t see her smile again. I can’t see her eyes glaring at me in anger or her eyes staring at me softly. I can’t hear her voice scolding or teasing me again. I was taking an easy way out without thinking clearly. I regret it.” He took his drink right away after he finished his words.

Another hand covered his wine glass after he put it on the table. He lifted his face up & saw Jiyeon staring at him sadly, “Please Oppa, don’t be like that.”

Yunho sighed again. Why did they have to disturb him here when he needed to be alone? How did they find him?

As if she knew what he was thinking, Jiyeon said, “I asked Jaejoong Oppa to help me find you. I’m worried about you. You didn’t show up at the office. You turned off your mobile phone & you don’t go home. What happened to you, Oppa?”

She started to sob. Her eyes were gleaming with tears. She stared at him with a sad expression on her face. Yunho didn’t answer her. He just sighed deeply as he refused to share his depression with her, “I’m alright.” “No, you’re not!” She said quickly, raising her voice a bit.

Yunho lowered his head, staring back at his wine glass in his hand & playing with it. He didn’t want to argue with her. He wasn’t in the mood to talk about Yuri.

She took his glass tenderly & put her hand on the top of his hand, “You can’t blame yourself, Oppa! You have done the best thing for her! You have prepared anything for her to keep her by your side, including your plan to transfer the ownership of your company to her! I said to you on Chunghee’s party that we couldn’t do that behind her back! What if she neglected the company?! You realize now that what I said was the truth! Fortunately, we haven’t done the legal papers for transferring your shares under her name! Gosh! I can’t imagine having a business partner like her! I don’t understand Yuri! Honestly, I don’t understand her, Oppa! She kept torturing you & finally she left you to be together with her fiance after what you have done for her! Is this what she wants from you?! By making you live like this?! Is she satisfy now?! She yelled at him in frustration. Her face reddened as she pressed down her emotion.

Yunho closed his eyes & buried his head under his hands. He felt tired of hearing anymore words about Yuri. However, he couldn’t say anything to Jiyeon so she can stop talking as he knows that she’s just worried about him. He was glad that he still had friends that cared about him. He had to stop her grumbling about Yuri if he didn’t want to add more pained to his heart.

Looking at the main floor which was almost full of couples dancing, he took her hand & said in a light tone, “Come on. Dance with me please.” He hoped he could erase his pain slightly by dancing.

Jaejoong stared at them in awe as the couple went to the dance floor, hand in hand. He shook his head secretly as he didn’t understand what was going on. Yunho was extremely acting weird now.

Stepping onto the dance floor, Yunho forced on a smile. Changing into a love ballad suddenly, he frowned. How could the singer change it to a slow song? He wanted to dance because the singer sang light melodies to lift his depression. However, he changed it to a love ballad.

Jiyeon placed her hand around his neck when the singer started to sing & smiled at him beautifully. Yunho tried to smile back. He put his hands around her waist, ‘You’re was a great pretender.’ His heart said to himself. He tried to concentrate on the song, hoping to relief his sadness & depression.

Fixing his eyes on the stage where the male young singer took a microphone to begin his phrase, Yunho sighed deeply secretly.

‘Yet another icy winter has passed

My broken heart is like a film before my eyes

Still remember you said both of us must take care

I can only wave goodbye

While my wound is throbbing with pain’

‘Damn!’ He cursed, under his breath, ‘Why did the singer sing a sad song? Why does everybody seemed to want to open my wounds for losing Yuri?’ He closed his eyes as he felt his heart slamming against his ribs.

‘With a smile, I turn around to face

When the snow comes

Will you remember me?

I am far away wishing you prosperity

Accompanying you every spring, summer, autumn, winter

My lover

Are you happy now?

I remember that after walking through wind & rain

There is still someone who remains tolerant’

Yunho turned his misty eyes to look outside the window, ‘Yuri, when the snow is falling, are you still thinking of me? Are you happy now?’ He asked silently, inside his heart.

Engrossing with the song deeply, he couldn’t press his emotion down anymore. He hugged Jiyeon in his embrace tightly as if he was holding Yuri in his arms. He closed his eyes as the song continued to cry out his bleeding heart. He felt his eyes getting hot.

‘In the past, how many

Excitements have we gone through in our youth?

Although I owe you a lot

But you have never made me feel upset’

Jiyeon felt Yunho hugging her tightly. She felt his body trembling. She closed her eyes as she felt pain stabbing her heart. She was angry at Yuri to make her debonair, strong, enthusiastic Jung Yunho turned himself into a pathetic loser! Yunho had never been s