"Fall for him but never chase him,

never ."

I managed to study and kept my mind off of Suzy. Not until my stomach decided to grumble and I groaned. I haven’t had dinner yet. I stood up from my study desk and went out of my room. While I was walking down the stairs, I noticed it was so quiet.

Isn’t mom around?

I look around the living room and the kitchen and she was not there. I went in the kitchen to look for food and saw a note was left on the fridge my mother.

It said :

Soohyun honey, you weren’t coming out of your room and you seem to be in a bad mood so I left alone to my friend’s party. If you’re hungry, go out and buy some food. Get some fresh air!

Love, your beautiful mother.

I chuckled . My mom would always be my mother. Sometimes I pity her. She always attend this social parties but I’m not the type to go to those kind of things so I rarely accompany her. I bet she really wants a daughter.

I sighed . “ She should just find herself a man and get married “ I said and shook my head. Next year , I’m heading to college and I don’t want to think that my mom would be left alone. She’s lonely as she is and she only has me. She really should find someone.

My stomach grumbled again. I rolled my eyes and sighed. “ Fine. I’ll feed you , just wait “ I talked to myself , took my jacket and scarf and keys and walked out the door into the cold night air.

I also didn’t forget to leave my phone at home. [ Yes, I am sulking ]

//

So I went to this small chicken store which wasn’t crowded with people. There’s only another two tables that have people eating . I ordered a whole chicken to myself and sat there. This is a good feast for my hungry self. I picked one up and started munching on it. The savory taste and the crunchiness just made me sigh in pleasure. How long has it been since I enjoy myself like this?

Just as I thought. Dating is trouble. I should’ve known since the beginning that dating a girl who’s moving away is not going to be easy. But I still want to be with her. I’m not as nice as she thought I am. When I get angry, I can hurt the people I love.

I sighed. I need to be careful. Suzy is a sensitive person. She’ll be scarred for life if I hurt her. I should never get truly angry in front of her.

I was on my third chicken as countless thoughts just came rushing in my mind.

Jonghyun was walking by the stores when he saw me in the store alone, so he walked in. He came in front of me and took a seat. He even mindlessly grabbed one of my chicken parts and ate it without my permission. I wasn’t lying when I said I was really hungry.

“Hey, buy one yourself “ I said , my mouth still filled with chicken. Jonghyun laughs “ You look grumpy as hell “.

I rolled my eyes “ Because you took my chicken. “

He snorted “Don’t be childish. “ I sulked even further and slouched on my seat. We ate in silence. This time I let him take my chicken. I should be generous ,right?

“ So what’s up with you? Even IU said you were weird at school. And now I found you alone in a chicken store, eating a whole chicken by yourself. “ he said but I ignore him. Since when does he concern himself with me? Did he forget that I’m his rival? I dated Suzy when he knows Suzy longer than I am.

From the thoughts, I grew grumpier and eat quickly, munching on the chicken angrily. I rarely get mood swings. But when I do, I can be a baby.

I coughed uncontrollably when I choked myself from eating too fast. I hit my chest a couple of times while coughing and Jonghyun quickly pour me a glass of water. I chugged on it like my life depended on it ; which it was.

“Whoa, you are being weird. It’s like you’re a different person. What’s wrong? “ he asked again.  I wished he would just shut up. Doesn’t he knows I just want to be alone now? I glared at him.

“You didn’t say anything yet you keep making weird expressions now and then. Come on spill “ he urged me. “ Ask your best friend “ I snapped at him and he scratched his head. “Suzy? “ he guessed.  I bit my lip and look around , giving it a thought. Should I let my feelings out to him ? My rival? Should I ask for his advice or something ?

The fact that I wanted to seek advice from Jonghyun is funny.

“ I think you acted weird since you talked to Raeha. Did she tell you something? “ he suddenly said. I gave him a look because it was kinda spot on. I did became moody after I talked to her.

Jonghyun continued talking. “ IU and Jiyeon did said Park Raeha has the skill to manipulate people with her words. Have you become her victim now ? “ he laughed at the end of his sentence and I glared at him for him to shut up. “Fine. I’ll shut up “ he said as if he read my mind.

I sighed loudly and lean on my seat. Maybe I should just tell. It wasn’t a world crisis or something.

“Just tell me, damn it” he urged me again and rolled his eyes. I’m laughing at the fact he’s actually putting up with me right now.

“Fine! She didn’t even call me yesterday and today and until now” I confessed and suddenly felt embarrassed . It was just a small matter yet I made it like it was a big deal out of jealousy.

JH snorted. “I thought you told her that she doesn’t have to call you in case you didn’t pick up? “

Not this again. I thought.

“I know! But still though. Since I didn’t call her, she should’ve wonder what happen to me and how I’m doing” I made an excuse childishly. He gave me an unbelievable look and said “ You’re so childish . I can’t believe I’m the mature one here “ he said , giving a smirk. I wished to wipe it off of his face. Why am I here talking to this guy in the first place?

Oh right. He intruded my meal.

I made a sulky face and he shook his head “You’re cheesy man. I wonder how Suzy stands you” he said.

I rolled my eyes in annoyance for the nth time and said “ You’re not help , Jonghyun”

 //

Suzy’s POV

So ….. Soohyun didn’t call me for two days now. I wonder why I agreed when he said don’t call him and that he will call me. It just makes me anxious.

I wonder what happened to him. It took a lot of self-restraint in me not to hit the call button. Geez, Soohyun can be so demanding sometimes. I shouldn’t have just agree to anything he suggests. I pouted at the thought.

Maybe he’s busy with school activities. I thought and suddenly that Park Raeha girl came in my mind . How she told me off the other day. I snorted. As if she knows me to judge me. She’s shameless considering she was the one who flirted with someone else’s boyfriend. I shook my head at the thought.

“I should just call “ I said to myself that morning when I was waiting for the bus.  I pressed call and waited but no one pick up. I guess he didn’t notice. I called him again twice but it’s still unresponsive. “Hmm “ I mumbled to myself. I decided to wave it off in case I am bothering him. Plus, I left him 3 missed calls. Maybe when he saw it, he’ll call me.

//

The next two days were dreadful. I didn’t know what to do. I went to school as usual because exams are coming up so I need to focus. But in between breaks, whenever I check on my phone , there is still no reply. Maybe he is so busy with his studies too, he doesn’t want to be bothered? I kept wondering and wondering and since there’s no one to reply to me , I got so bothered by it.

Then I remember my best friend , IU. I should call her! I thought.

I hit call to her contact number and within 2 rings she picked up. She must be in a break right now too. “Jieun! “I called out to her . “Suzy ah. What’s up? It’s weird you’re calling me in school hours. Do you miss me that much? “ she joked and I laughed whole heartedly. “ Yeah I do miss you. But that’s not the matter “ I said.

“Geez “ she said , “I’m offended “ she joked.

“Okay what is it” she asked.

“It’s about Soohyun. Is he okay? He didn’t contact me in quite some time now” I told her worriedly.

There was a short silence then IU said “Ehhhhh? Really? Well… “ she said and I heard as if she had her face away from the phone. Maybe she was looking over at him. There are in the same class after all.

“ He was a bit weird for the past few days. He would not concentrate in class before but now he’s just too focus, I think he doesn’t notice the surrounding” she said . I listen carefully and didn’t reply.

Was he stressed because of school?

Was he too focused on studies that he doesn’t want to think of other matters? For example, their relationship?

A thousand thoughts rushed into my mind. One of them is ; did I do something wrong?

IU noticed my silence for a while so she spoke  “ Do you want me to try and talk to him? “ she asked ,considerately. I shook my head as if she could see and said “ No. It’s fine “

I’m somehow afraid if he’ll get annoyed by me. By my presence somehow.

Before we hung up on each other , my best friend added “I will try and talk to him okay ?”

//

I was a bit fazed then. I stared out the window when the teacher was teaching. The teacher called out to me but fortunately I didn’t get scolded or a detention for not focusing.

I think Key noticed it because he poked me on my shoulder from the back and asked if I was okay. I smiled at him assuring I’m fine when I was not.

After school, I walked out of the class early, leaving my friends behind. I don’t know if they’ll get offended by it but I honestly don’t care anymore. It’s not like we’re that close anyway so there’s no need for them to be offended right?

But somehow , the only person I am close to, managed to catch up on me. “Hey wait” Key said , holding back my hand, he touched me by my elbow. “ What? I’m not feeling well, Key”  I said.

“ I know what’s on your mind” he said.

I made an annoyed face and shook my head “ I don’t want to talk right now okay. I’m feeling dizzy “ I said, which wasn’t a lie. I am feeling a bit dizzy right now.

“Look. Although I might just know you for quite some time now. Your face isn’t that hard to read. Your boyfriend was bothering your mind ,right ? You always make the same face whenever you’re thinking about him “ he said and I feel so troubled by it .

I’m making this a big deal and who knows if Key is hurt by it?

I didn’t say anything and just stood there . His hands are still on my elbow then it went down to my hands. He wrapped his hands around my hand and I look at him , confused by his actions.

He gave me a hurtful look and said “Listen to me , Suzy . If you feel like you’re being in a relationship that constantly make you uncomfortable and afraid that the person might leave you.. “

He took my other hand and I just stare at him , “ You should back out of it “ he continued his sentence and end it there. I don’t know why. But in that moment, his gaze just pierced through my heart and something inside me just ticked.

This relationship,  Soohyun and I am in, constantly makes me feel insecure. And I don’t think I can put up with it any longer. I want to be free from it.

///

Oooh just got real. I think this is the only  chapter that I poured my heart and soul into and it honestly feels good. I should feel like this more often.

My ex looks like Kim Soohyun tbh HAHA. But of course Kim Soohyun is X10000000000000000 more handsome than anyone. Its just that he has a hint of KSH vibe. That’s why sometimes it’s a pain to look at KSH

Tell me if you like this chapt. Some bromance going on? lol