I ran forward blindly. Adrenaline filled me. No, something else did. Rage, anger, pure insanity. I could feel it, Myungsoo’s pure emotions echoing throughout my subconscious mind. I swung my bat wildly, not caring if I hit him or not. I just needed to get him away from Krystal. I could hear her sobs behind me but I didn’t dare look at her. I couldn’t afford to get distracted, for hers sake and mine. My eyes were darting back and forth, but I couldn’t see anything.

 Literally.

 From the blood, dirt, and the rage. I had no sense of sanity in me. I was acting on my instincts. I was an animal, backed up and wild.

I didn’t even feel the impact but I soon found myself on the ground, flung a few feet away. I was still clutching the bat, stained with my blood now. My right hand balled up, and in a swift move, I flung the sand in my hand upwards, and swung my bat at the same time. This time I felt the collision. The sound of metal to bone was sickening as always, and I could feel my arms tingling from the excitement.

I could feel myself enjoying this again. The violence and blood. Hohoho. Now this is my field. Myungsoo might be the one fuelling me with the anger, but I’ll be the one enjoying this tango. I didn’t give Dongwoo a chance to recover, instantly swinging my bat at him again. This time he managed to dodge it, the bat ramming against the hard ground instead. He used this chance to try and hit me with the hammer but instead, I ran forward, ramming my shoulder against his chest. Both of us stumbled onto the ground, our weapons flung onto the ground. I didn’t waste my time grovelling for my bat. I grabbed the back of his collar, pulling him back and away from his hammer. I could her him choking against his collar as I straddled his back, a smile etched on my face. His neck was bent so far back, we managed to have eye contact.

My legs wrapped around his torso as my left arm wrapped around his neck, pulling it backwards. I started laughing as I bashed his face with my right hand, the sounds of fist against jaw making me happy. He was clawing against my arms, his nail digging into my flesh, but I couldn’t feel the pain. I was too high on euphoria, enjoying the violence too much. I heard my own laughter, raspy and gravelly, escape from my mouth. I leaned closer to his ear, his neck stretched to its limits.

“Whose fault was it that things ended up this way, huh?”

I didn’t let up, bashing his face in, each strike getting harder and harder. I started getting greedy, my eyes searching for the bat. As my eyes wandered around, I looked straight at Krystal. Her eyes red from the pain and tears, her cheeks streaked with tears and her arm, red and throbbing. I could see the flesh pulsing as her bone jagged in an unnatural manner. The pain must have been unbearable for her and that thought struck a nerve in my heart. Pain and guilt gripped my heart, knowing I was the cause of her pain.

That moment of guilt stopped me for a second. I was scared, scared that she would see me like this, in my crazed state. Dongwoo used that second to his advantage, flipping me over in an instant and pushing my face into the dirt with his knee.

“You seem to be mistaken. You’re not in charge here, I am.”

It took him one strike, a punch right to the throat to render me motionless.

“You’re still too weak, too dependent on your emotions. You should probably surrender to your insanity more!”

A cackle pierced my ears as his boots hovered over my head, a few seconds before crashing into my face.