(OST Sweety You by Urban Zakapa)

Sitting on the bench the hair dresser and stylist fixed up my hair and makeup. Soon after the director got the clapper board to be hit and then the cameras began rolling. We were filming outside again for one of the final three episodes that were to air.

“Sanghyun-sshi get into position,” Seungho nodded despite being called his character’s name and moved to his spot.

“Ready and action,” the director called. As commanded Seungho sat down as though he had just come; he turned to me.

“Bobae, when are you going to tell me?”

I raised my eyebrows at him to appear confused, “T-Tell you what?”

“Tell me how you feel.”

Pausing I glanced around as though I wasn’t sure. He waited for me as I kept playing the part of the un-sure girl. Finally I breathed out slowly; the cameras were up close to capture my small gestures. Like on cue he grabbed me by the hand.

I spun my head around to him as he kept on insisting. “Bobae—“

“Oppa I—“

He then pressed his lips against mine. I acted like this was a surprise and closed my eyes. But before he could pull away the director called out “cut.” He moved away and we sat down next to each other. I wiped my mouth. The kissing scenes were still weird for me to film.

“Hey, does his kiss disgust you?!”

Startled I looked around until I saw a small entourage of girls in high school uniform. Their faces were full of disapproval and disgust. There was no chance for me to reply before another one said something just as rude. “You’re not pretty enough to be an actress.”

“She can’t even sing either. Why else would they put Bomi and Eunji unnie in a sub unit and not her?”

That was not true. Because they were from Busan the president wanted to go beyond the concepts of usual sub units and focus on creating one that could gain interest in their home town. However, would they listen to reason?

“Don’t even think of getting oppa’s number when the drama’s over.” Another girl chimed in, her tone condescending. “You are not his type.” Yoo Seungho returned with his water bottle. He glanced at the girls who were screaming in delight.

“What’s going on?”

“Oppa she’s no good for you.”

To this he sighed and shook his head. “Do you think that just because we’re acting together we should date?” This got them silent for a moment. He put his water bottle down. “Naeun, I am sorry about them,”

This got them riled. Whether it was because he had been informal with me or for apologising I had no idea. They had to be escorted away by one of the security guards watching the perimeter of the filming set. All of them just glared at me and I heard names that would make the elderly blush. Seungho checked that I was ok and to a degree I was. But I still felt hurt by what had happened.

“Ahem,” the director came over to us. “I think we should take a break from filming. It seems that the girls are going to spread senseless rumours about.”

Yoo Seungho nodded. “Alright I understand.” He stood to leave. “See you later Naeun.” I nodded, feeling glum about ruining the filming by my careless action. If I only I was more careful. Maybe then all that trouble didn’t have to happen.
 

Ω
 

Sitting in the dressing room I stared at my reflection in the mirror, struggling to comprehend how I appeared. My hair was left down in waves; the shoes were gold sandals with a heel and rhinestones on the straps. The soft red dress itself was long except for a split in the side revealing half my leg. The design itself was plain; the only detailing appeared at the halter neck where the fabric changed grade to a richer wine shade.

I don’t think there was ever a time that I really realised my beauty. The members complimented me. The staff at photo shoots complimented me and even guys from other idol groups would tell me I’m pretty. Yet their words did not feel true. Maybe it is just how I am. Or maybe I have been living with a lie for all my life.

There was a knock on the door and I turned in my chair. Standing up I bowed to the staff with the headset on. “Son Naeun, you’ll be on in ten.” Nodding I quickly gathered up the edge of my dress and followed him down the hall to the studio. From what I had heard it was a rather large area and set up to be rather grand.

As I entered in from the back door my breath got caught at the size. There were at least seven rows of seats pointing to the stage that was above the ground. Before the rows were at least several metres of space, I guessed there were having a moss pit area too. The band area was closed off in an ellipsis, brass, keyboard, string, wood wine and at least one guitarist. The backdrop was a thick dark blue curtain.

To get on the stage there were steps going up to the side or a large staircase that came from the other side. Near them on a slight rise out of the reach of the dancers was a table covered by a black cloth, four chairs behind it. I assumed that was where the judges would sit.

“Naeun-sshi,” Shin Dongup came over and I greeted him. The Stage director showed us where to stand which would be in the middle of the rise, the judges on our right. We received our scripts and read over them as they then let the audience in.

The numbers were large. I felt my stomach twist in the unease of having to speak in front of them all. Not to mention my fellow group member, the other two judges and Taemin. The crowds were ushered to their places whether it was in the standing area or the chairs. Someone cheered and I turned to see the four judges appear.

I only knew the two older men by their names though I knew Poppin Hyung Joon by watching an Immortal Song 2 performance. Bomi unnie looked pretty with her hair in a ponytail and dark blue shirt with white jeans. She laughed with the staff while someone sat next to her, face rather bored.

Taemin, it felt strange having him nearby after a while. Even though we were singers our schedules had not be in synch for the past five years. A week after SHINee had finished promotions we had our comeback and when we had finished our comeback they had started promoting two weeks later.

I admit that he looked as though he hadn’t changed much. He was in a beige coat with a black dress shirt underneath in jeans and black shoes. The coat brought me back to that fateful final day. He’d worn a coat like that back then too.

Someone tapped me on the shoulder and snapped me back to reality. Turning I saw it was Shin Dongup who was telling me to look into a camera as the studio was made to be silent for the opening of the show.

Why now? I hadn’t even cleared the air with Taemin yet.

Ω

“Welcome everyone,” Dongup shared with the crowd. “It’s the opening night of our show. Naeun-sshi this is your first real job at being an MC since you debuted. Tell us how do you feel?”

There were some cheers as all the attention went onto me. Swallowing I spoke in a little bit of a shaky voice. “Ah yes hello everyone,” some people called out to me in support. Gluing my eyes to the script I kept on speaking. “It’s really great. I am a little nervous so I hope that you’ll all take care of me.” Some people clapped. Dongup glanced at the cards before speaking.

“Well keep looking pretty and we won’t mind how badly you do.” That caused some laughs and me wanting to run for the hills. It wasn’t in the script!

“Alright now it’s time to hear from our judges.” We moved around to look at them. “Jaewook-sshi was a dancer in YG entertainment. This is your first appearance on a dancing show without you dancing. Do you wish you were on stage with your team?” I just laughed again as everyone else did. As long as I reacted in the same way that everyone else did then I could blend in for a few moments at a time.

He quickly bowed before speaking. “Yes I do wish I was dancing with them. But being here gives me a good chance to see how others dance under the same pressure I’ve been under.” At this point I seemed to have tuned out during Hyung Joon-sshi’s interview but asked the questions I was required to.

“Now Naeun I bet you’re happy to see one of your members here today.” There were yells of delight from boys as the spotlight went onto Bomi unnie who laughed in her seat.

“I am happy because I haven’t seen her a lot since she started promoting.” I said, trying not to sound robotic and express that like the card said I was indeed pleased to see her.

Dongup-sshi kept on talking. “You’re the only female judge in this show how are you going to critique the dancers?”

Despite how she had sounded just a moment ago Bomi unnie sounded calm as she spoke. “For one I can focus on the aspects that the men might overlook such as the feel in the dance.” There were cries from possible feminists in glad agreement.

“How would you say Son Naeun’s doing tonight based on the opinion as one of her members?”

“She’s awesome,” Bomi gave me two thumbs up and the crowd responded well. I shyly thanked her, hair falling about my face. It was then time to face the music. He seemed to have been watching me the whole time but when our eyes briefly met I felt everything start to slow down.

Up close his face had not changed. His hair had and he did look a little older but otherwise it was still the same Lee Taemin I had met years before.
“Taemin-sshi, you were very busy with your activities as a soloist before.” My co-MC started to say. “Be honest with me, have you had some rest since then?”

He suddenly made a smirk, his eyes going small. I had to swallow hard for I thought my heart would beat so loudly. It was the same amused gesture that he had when we filmed. He started to talk and I managed to keep myself calm and composed.

“Ah I’ve been busy for weeks. The filming for this show has taken a lot of time. I’m just glad that I am able to sit down for a bit.”

“Ah yes Naeun-sshi?” Dongup-sshi addressed me. I blinked clueless at what he was doing. “You should probably say hello to him before you ask him something since you both were once married.” The laughter sounded defeaning, the watchful eyes of everyone including Bomi unnie’s made me shrink down inside.  I glanced around, completely at a loss.

“Greet brother in-law.”

Taemin stood up and I gently bowed. “Ah hello,” I said to him, putting on a rather awkward smile.

He appeared a little bewildered himself but managed his expression well. “Hello Naeun-sshi,” he said. Usually I was the one composed and he had left. Dongup started to clap.

“Ah young love, now you can speak to him comfortably.”

How could I? He had gone off the script to improvise those lines just so I could say hello to him. I started to speak again to Taemin, barely eyeing him though as I asked the question. He answered it however with the way he was dipping his head down suggested he wanted to meet my eyes. Now I wanted to be buried six feet. I didn’t want to reunite with him like that.

Ω

Well thanks for waiting everyone. I’m going to change my day of updating to Sundays so I hope that is alright with all of you. They met at last and it’s awkward haha.