Can't Help Myself

Hold Me, Thrill Me, Kiss Me
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“She’s… what?” Dara yammered as she just heard her husband’s statement.

 

Jiyong clapped his hands once and grinned like a boy, “Yeah. She’s gonna stay the night here. We’re going to watch soccer, together with Seunghyun. Is that a problem?” He asked hesitantly.

 

Dara rolled her eyes. She went back to what she was doing, washing the dishes.

She looked outside the window, as usual, to see if Chaerin has come back from morning jog.

 

Jiyong is getting along well with Chaerin. They like to do things together, Jiyong said Chaerin is the best friend he has never had. He likes her a lot. He said they have a lot of things in common. When Dara asked Chaerin about what she thinks of her husband, the answer is the same. She said they clicked and she never had a friend like Jiyong.

 

It’s not like Dara is jealous because her husband is getting closer with her ‘lover’ but it’s just weird having a fling with someone who is friends with her husband. It makes her more burdened by the guilt.

Plus, Dara is always freaking nervous whenever Chaerin is hanging out with Jiyong. She’s afraid somehow something might slip out of Chaerin mouth and Jiyong will find out about them. She’s nervous all the time at the dinner because she’s afraid the secret smile and glance Chaerin gives to her is gonna start looking obvious.

 

Dara is also upset because every time the two of them are together, they’re like forgetting that she’s there. She’s always excluded from the conversation and the games.

 

“Do you think you’ve been spending time a lot with her? Don’t you think people are gonna start asking why?” Dara said.

 

Jiyong narrowed his eyes. He crossed his arms and started studying his wife’s face. Dara quickly looked away from him and finished up the dishes.

 

“Are you jealous?” Jiyong raised his voice and he chuckled. He went closer to Dara and hugged her from behind.

 

“Wow you’re jealous over me and her… that’s weird. You know we’re just friends.” He said and he giggled like there’s no tomorrow.

 

“I’m not jealous. I’m just worried.”

 

“No. You’re jealous.”

 

“No. I’m not.” Dara exclaimed. She ran off to the living room and started tidying up.

Jiyong followed her with his naughty smile. He’s not going to work today. He decided to take a day off to rest. Besides it’s Saturday, it’s a best day to stay with the family and friends.

 

“Dara… what’s your problem? Are you upset because we never include you?”

 

Dara scowled at Jiyong, “Yes!” she finally admitted it.

 

Jiyong grinned, “You’re like a child. Like a little girl… it’s cute.” Jiyong said and pulled Dara over.

 

“Come here let me hug you for a while…” Jiyong murmured as Dara wanted to get away from him.

 

“I love you, Dara. I won’t do things that hurt you. I won’t betray you, ever!”

 

“I’m sorry…”

 

“What for? I’m glad you’re worried actually. I’m glad you’re jealous.”

 

Dara rolled her eyes. “I’m not jealous.”

 

Even if she’s jealous, Dara is not really sure what she’s jealous for…

Is it because she’s jealous her husband is hanging out with another woman or she’s jealous because that woman is getting along well with her husband?

 

 

***

 

 

Seunghyun came to the house with a box of beers and bags of chips. Bom couldn’t join because she’s going to her parents’ house with the kids. After they all finished dinner, they gathered in the living room to watch TV, waited for the game to start.

 

Dara stole glance at Chaerin several times, and the other way around. Dara can’t catch up with what the three of them are talking about because it’s boy’s matters and she still doesn’t understand why Chaerin is interested in stuffs like that.

 

“I only had boy friends when since I was a kid.” That was Chaerin’s answer when Dara asked her. So it makes sense.

 

“How did you two meet?” Chaerin suddenly asked.

 

Dara looked at Chaerin, surprised with the question. Chaerin never really asked personal things like that when they’re together. But why now, Dara thought.

 

Dara smiled at Jiyong. “We first met in high school…” Dara replied.

 

“Yeah I wasn’t at the same school with her but when we moved to college I followed her and decided to go to the same college with her, to chase after her and asked her out. And guess what? We ended up marrying each other, how fun is that?”

 

Chaerin nodded, a bitter smile appeared on her face. She leaned back to the couch and sighed. “That’s really cute…” she commented and stole a glance at blushing Dara.

 

Jiyong is also blushed. He kissed Dara on the cheek. “Yeah I think we’re cute.”

 

Seunghyun smirked, “Cut it off, Jiyong! You’re not cute…” he said.

 

And then Jiyong and Seunghyun started bickering like fourteen years old boys. Dara caught Chaerin’s eyes once again. Chaerin smiled at her, that smile never wears out and never fails to make Dara flushed.

 

“I think the game is gonna start…” Seunghyun said and then they all started watching the TV.

 

Dara didn’t stay long though. She has to send Seungri to bed. Then she ended up sleeping next to him.

Meanwhile, Chaerin is spending the night in the living room watching soccer game together with her new friends Seunghyun and Jiyong who will never shut up. But she likes spending time with them. It makes her feel appreciated and loved.

 

She just smiles every time the boys start doing silly things. She loves soccer. She loves watching the game but not tonight. She just can’t stop thinking about Dara. Well it has been going on for months. It’s been five months since they met each other and weeks since they started seeing each other. She still hasn’t figured out what to do next. She realized she can’t be forever doing this with Dara. Somehow she needs to stop.

 

Chaerin lied down on the couch when Seunghyun and Jiyong are asleep. It’s three in the morning. The television is still on and she is not even sleepy.

 

Dara woke up suddenly, realizing she’s not in her own room. She went downstairs and found the television is on. She walked closer to the living room and caught Chaerin is still up. She’s lying down comfortably, drinking the beer and watching the television quietly.

 

Dara cleared , “Hey!”

 

Chaerin got up slowly and turned her head at Dara. She smiled literally.

 

“Hi! I thought you were asleep.”

 

“I just woke up… I wanted to see you guys.”

 

Chaerin smirked, “They’re sleeping, safe and sound.”

 

Dara nodded. She smiled at Chaerin. “I’m gonna go to the kitchen, to grab some milk. You want some?”

 

“Sure.” Chaerin got up, followed Dara to the kitchen.

 

“Shoot what were you guys doing?” Dara complained as she saw a bunch of dirty plates in the sink.

“Yea we got hungry so we wrecked your kitchen… Sorry.” Chaerin murmured and leaned on the kitchen table, watching Dara. She started pulling up her sleeves to wash the dishes for the second time tonight.

 

“Geez…”

 

“You’re a clean freak.” Chaerin stated.

 

Dara scoffed, “It has become a habit. I don’t have much to do at home so all I do is cleaning up. I just can’t stand the dirt and the mess. Why don’t you help me instead of starring?”

 

Chaerin smirked. She yawned, “Oh I’m helping now… I’m helping watching you wash the dishes with this cute smile on my face, so you can gain your energy by looking at my smile…”

 

Dara looked at Chaerin and erupted to giggle, “You’re unbelievable.”

 

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EmberDreams
#1
Chapter 26: I love your fanfics so much omg >_<
EmberDreams
#2
Chapter 24: Oh dear
EmberDreams
#3
Chapter 23: THIS IS SO SAD
EmberDreams
#4
Chapter 21: Omg don't leave Dara nooooooo SHES ALL ALONE
EmberDreams
#5
Chapter 20: The suspense is real >_<
EmberDreams
#6
Chapter 15: So sad TT
EmberDreams
#7
Chapter 13: Omg this chapter was intense
EmberDreams
#8
Chapter 8: Chae kissed her aunt?!
CessOrina
#9
Chapter 22: I dont know about this chapter.. its just that dara decided to let go and chose chaerin.. but if chaerin isnt up for the relationship, i would rather fix the mess first like child custody, divorce, and find a job.. its just me though.. i would rather prioritize than waste my time over dara's unrequitted love to chaerin.. though its better to grieve and pave the way for acceptance over the choices she made
queenofGZB #10
Chapter 26: Fuhhh. I finished this story in 6 hours. Still love your fanfic duhhh.
Love you authornim