Chapter 26

-hyung, are you trying to be like that forever?

-there is nothing to talk about…I have to go..

-hyung!!! You know I did that…for you!

-come on, for me? I told you before, you will ruin everything…you didn't do it for me! don't imagine things not exist!

-I know she loves you…and she knows that too…but I don't know why she denied it.

-even when you knew that…you told her!! Siwon, you changed! I'm not angry or upset…if she choose you then, I don't have to involve myself with you guys!

-don't talk like if I stole your girl! Hyung, you didn't think about it in the right way…

-what are you trying to say?

-what if she knows? What if she loves you and you both hang out a lot…didn't you think about what will happen then?

-STOP!! Stop!!

-listen, I don't have any strange feeling to her….

-oh please…

-please, I want you to know my true reason!!

-are you saying that you are not in love with her?

-she have been through many difficulties, and you only one who knew about her problems…and we all know your true feelings…but, don't you think the hates after loves would be more hateful thing in the world? I wanted to erase her from your heart and you from her heart…

-you still deny that you don’t have any strange feelings to her! You think about the whole thing and you didn't even think to tell me…

-why you can't understand me? believe me…I did it because I don't want to see you broken!

-don't pretend to be her hero! I don't…and I won’t say anything, siwon….

-she will know sooner or later…your sister will arrive tonight, and you know your sis well!! the things are getting more complicated, don't get…

Someone's hands close my ears while my tears fell down hardly and burning my cheeks. He turned my head to where he was. Donghae was holding my head and closing my ears with his injured hands. I was crying, crying and crying!!! I didn't expect to see him near me when I really need someone! He looked at me in a pity way. I was shivering to death. "are you crazy? When you know that it will hurt you, why you kept listening to them?" he grabbed my hand then pulled me inside. I sat on the couch then he gave me a glass of water. "try to drink it" I drank it then put it on the table. I wiped my tears roughly from my eyes and cheeks. "don't ask me, cause I don't know anything, I'm surprised like you!! We have to know the truth before we get unfair judge of their talking, so don't get mad or upset, the thing will fold up soon" I didn't raise my head, I was totally blank.  

-listen, you have to ask siwon-hyung or Jang su-hyung…

-do you think it's easy for a girl to ask questions like these?

-do you want me to ask?

-no…I don't want to know either…being fool like this is better than knowing the details!

-Uee-sshi…

I raised my head when he spelled my name, it was the first time that he pronounced it, it was the first time that my ear heard it from his mouth! Was it the right time to be happy about something silly? I wanted to forget what happened. it was hard to hear siwon saying that he didn't hold any feeling toward me! it was killing me! but why he acted like he was falling for me?

 even though I told donghae that I didn't want to know the detail but inside, I wanted to know each detail and the secret behind those two! Should I trust Jay? Or should I believe what I heard? We kept sitting beside each other silently. "I don't know if I have to say this to you…" I paused then added. "today, could be one of my greatest day, if I didn't hear them, it might become one!" he looked at me and I felt his move but my head still looking down, it was heavy enough to raise. I kept shaking and barely breath. It wasn't because of this incident only, but because what Jay told me too! I hoped that I didn't hear them to not stuck these words in my head! I didn't want to believe Jay no matter what, but they both made me thought about Jay's words.

"what happened to you that make you happy? Can you answer me?" I raised my head slowly to see him. Then siwon came in which prevent me from talking. My heart pumped out when he closed the door. I didn't want to see his face, seeing him made me tore into pieces! I peeked at donghae whose face was holding lots of sarcastic. He didn't let off his awful side even with his friends. Looking at his eyes will make you regret doing something…even if you didn't do it!! That's what I hate about him, he has his own authority and way to let the person in front of him lose his temper!!! "he went to bring his sister" "we know!" donghae immediately answered him. His voice showed to me how he was frustrated about what he heard, I hope I'm right with his feeling. "are you both still awkward with each other?" siwon asked and sat in front of us. "NO" donghae, once again, replied roughly.   

"glad to hear it from you!" siwon smiled made me replayed my memories with him. Was he really didn't have any feelings? I looked at him with a very, very pitiful look. I hated myself for this unbelievable look! But I couldn't control myself! "what's wrong Uee-sshi? Is there something on my face?" I shook my head then I changed my sight. He embarrassed me! "ah, I was late because hyukjae-sshi called hyung, I greeted him, his mother situation still the same…" was he telling the truth? Or was it another lie? "what's wrong with you? Why you both looking gloomy?" "we are waiting, what do you want us to do?" donghae's sharp answer attacked siwon. Siwon stood then opened the T.V. he held the remote powerfully and changed the channels until he stopped in music one! My mood really…really wasn't able to hear anything! "just in case you want to raise your tension!!" donghae and I smirked at what siwon said. We still waited Jang su to come back, the atmosphere was horrible, for me of course!

After one and half hour, Jang su arrived with his sister. She was pretty and looks like him! Waaah, I was surprised and shy to meet her. "siwon-sshi and donghae-sshi!!! WAAAHHH…I miss you guys! You changed a lot…yaah donghae-sshi, you are now more handsome!!" she ran toward them and hugged them tightly. To tell the truth, I didn't expect her to act freely like that! She surprised me! she kept shouting and wandered in the place, I didn't hide my wondering and I smirked, I couldn't smile a cute smile to her, well…she didn't recognize me at all. "YAAAAH!! We were in peace! Stay calm!!" Jang su scolded her which made me laugh secretly at his comment!! "OMO! Who is she? Girlfriend of one of you?? NO WAY!! YOU DIDN'T TELL ME THAT YOU GREW UP!" Jang su disappointed face was so clear. Actually, even siwon and donghae!! She was NOISY!

"she isn't girlfriend of anyone!" Jang su replied and killed her curious. Then siwon walked and put his arm around my shoulders. "it may be mine one day…I'm just waiting her!" I pushed his hand away without even concern of the people who looked at us. "stop doing whatever you want!" I got angry suddenly. "calm down, calm down…I don't want to see war here! I'm Hyuri! Nice to meet you" she was smiling ear to ear which I envied her somehow! "nice to see you too, I'm Uee" she clapped her hands happily, really she started to piss me off!!! What's wrong with her! " is hyukjae-sshi staying abroad for awhile?" she asked and her voice changed to a sad tone. "yes" donghae replied her. "I will take his room!! Hahahahaha" Jang su hided his face with his hand impatiently. "where are you sleeping, Uee-sshi?" she asked me which made me speechless. "in my room…I know you will think about bad thoughts…there is nothing, understood?" when Jang su answered her, she looked at him doubtfully then she laughed, a strong laugh!!!

"OPPA, did you know that YURI-SSHI kept calling me when I was abroad, she always provided me with everything I need, I have to thank her tomorrow for her care, will you take me?" when she spelled yuri's name my heart stopped for a second! I opened my eyes shocked of what I heard. How did she know her?? I stared at Jang su whose face changed upside down. "how did you know her?" I grabbed her arm and turned her to see me strongly. "you hurt me! what's wrong? Did you know yuri-sshi too?" again, hearing her name made my heart burning! The situation was funny yet awkward to me! hyuri and I were surrounded by the three guys. "yes I know her, she…" "enough…I told you before UEE! Don't ask about other's life anymore!" Jang su interrupted hyuri. he spoke to me informally, he shocked me! why he prevented her from talking? "yah, go and take some rest…tomorrow we will have a nice chat!" he pushed her to hyukjae's room and she even wanted to talk more! I was standing with a second shock! "I think….I will have… the same fate as my father!" the words went out my mouth then my feet carried me outside and left them in wonder.

At this horrible time, at this incredible situation, I wanted to sit near the sea no matter how much I hated it now, how much I held bad memories in front of it. Just seeing the sea sparkling made my heart and my brain relax. Here, where Jang su's confession to me, where siwon's confession to me. here, where I met Jang su for the first time, where I first talked to siwon! Here, where my endless pain started, where my pain started and not end! here, I came when yuri kicked me out! Here, when I cried silently! I started to hate this place because of these bad stories! I wanted to remember one good story near this place, but I couldn't! 'the story isn't finish yet, but why I feel like if it's the ending?'

I'm crying again!! I couldn't hold it anymore! It's more painful to keep it to myself! I wanted to scream instead of crying over and over again! but, crying like that was better than screaming like a crazy girl. I turned my head left and right…hoped to see that person who always follows me whenever I need him! But there was no one around! I didn't know why I kept thinking about Jay's words this much! It might be because…because I didn't want to believe it! But everything in front of me showed me the opposite of what my heart telling me to!

It was too late to stay outside. I stood and looked to the sea for the last minute. 'Since my identity is with me…I can work now and…I can leave them!' I said then sighed. When I turned my body I saw him behind me!! he was standing behind me!! I was…HAPPY!! Gosh, why am I like that? Even though I didn't care of him and headed to the house but he caught my arm. "what are you trying to do? Leave me!" I shouted at him. "what you did to my sis, did you see it acceptable? Answer me!" I looked at his eyes angrily, he was almost scolded me! "what? Are you teaching me how to act?" I stared at him for a minute so he was too. "I want to be sure that you'll not do anything to my sis" our eyes held lots of anger. We both, could feel these strange aura that surrounded us suddenly. "well…I will hit her! And pulled her hair too, I will insult her…DO YOU THINK I WILL DO THAT?"

he walked slowly toward me, I was totally angry…seeing him like that made me remembered lots of things in one second which I couldn't hold! "tell me the truth, why you followed me? it's not because of your sis, am I right?" I asked him with lots of confidence that rarely appeared in such situation! He didn't answer me and just focused his darken eyes on my face with a pity look that he didn't usually use! "I'm sorry, if my moved upset you… " again, there was no reply from him which frustrated me! I didn't move nor him, we gazed each other like if our eyes spoke instead of us, like if our eyes read what in our mind! The staring didn't finish until 2 minutes. then he decided to cut this bad game off and went by me and left me in wonder! 

"Do you really…love me?" I asked. I meant each word I said. Why I spelled it at this time? And why I refused to delay it further more? I stepped and stood over my heart. I asked him hoping to find a released answer. His back faced me, he didn't move at all even a slight move! like I froze him by my stupid question. I thought that he didn't hear me well, even though I knew 100% that he heard me clearly.

"I asked you…do you love me?" without hesitating or warning I asked again. is this what they call it love? Is that what they really call it love? Is this the love that they're talking about? is this the love that I have to step at my pride and hear him answering my question? In my case, I didn't experience this love yet, Jaewoon was far away from this love! but… I have always heard that love is like a flower…that would wilt if you didn't take good care of it!! That love I experienced it!

He didn't move…his answer was silence. I walked slowly to him then I faced his face. He was in shock, he couldn't believe what I said to him. When I faced him, I trembled and forgot all what I wanted to say…it was too difficult than I thought! I was speechless! I wanted to open my mouth, but it refused to! I couldn't control my body at all. "if I say…YES, would you leave siwon behind?" he broke the silence by his unsteadily voice. I didn't react too much as usual, actually I was preparing myself that he would say something about siwon anyway. "why? Is he loves me that much that you could lose your last chance for him? I don't think so" I replied with a very cold voice which is rarely I do! He flickered his eyes. "I didn't ask you because I wanted to cheat siwon, cause I already made a decision for siwon's relationship…" I paused which made him puzzled more than ever.

"I asked you, because I don't want you to complete this love…" I closed my mouth, I closed it as it was hard for me to complete these words which I didn't prepare myself to say it that way…or I didn't prepare myself  to believe it. I didn't expect this love to end…as it didn't even begin!!!

"what are these nonsense?" "they're not! And you know carefully what I mean…" "did you say that…you have a mutual feeling?" when he asked me, I didn't answer him nor did any reaction to his question. I thought at that moment I lost my feeling of sense! There was nothing effect me! "yes…and I can repeat it over and over again to you.." "then, why are you like that? Why you rejected me? or does this feeling growing after that day?" he interrupted me. I didn't answer him immediately, I took one whole minute to collect my thoughts and speak properly.

"it doesn't matter when this feeling started to grow. The fact that I love you didn't change" he stared at me with hopeless eyes. "why you wanted to prevent this love since we both love each other? Is there something wrong?" I smirked at what he said. I wanted to laugh out loud but there was nothing to laugh at this much! "didn't you hear him? Do you want me to put you in yuri's list? Do you want me to hate you to death?" his eyes large 3 times than it, he was shock of what my lips spelled out! "what…do you mean? Hear him? Yuri?" I sighed a heavy sigh. I took a very deep breathe. "don't act like you don't know anything…" I paused then completed. "it's not easy to hate someone you love from all your heart! It's not easy to hear what you both, SIWON AND YOU, hide from me. it's not easy to hear what is your true relationship with yuri…isn't it? Do you think I'm blind and duff? I'm not JANG SU!! I'M NOT!"

There was no emotion inside me at all, there wasn't at least tears in my eyes!! There wasn't any heart beating! But there was one thing that disturbed me, I was suffering without emotion! I was thinking of jang su deeply as I didn't want to end it…but everything forced me to do what I did. "I didn't know what you heard and…" I put my fingers on his lips and stopped him from talking. It was also without any feeling. I was totally collapsed!! His eyes opened widely at what I did and he truly closed his mouth. "Jang su…I will say your name informally just this time!!" I swallowed my saliva hardly, I knew that I didn't say his name like that this time only, it was many times that I did! But then I completed. "I was in a big mistake when I compared you with Jaewoon…he was far away from you, it's may you both look alike, but inside…there are lots of difference!" "who's…jaewoon?"

"do you want to know? He is my ex-boyfriend who died and risk his life in case to help me! do you know who is Jaewoon? You don't have the right to say his name this informally!" suddenly, some feeling exist me and told me to defend jaewoon. I remembered the smily jaewoon and led me to think…am I cheated him when I fell for another guy? He told me not to love anyone…he told me to love him only! But I cheated him!! Am I deserved his love? His true love?! "I'm sorry to hear that…I.." "you don't have to…" I interrupted him again. "sometime I think that I fell for the wrong person…why? Who are you? What you have that the other didn't?" I was attacking him with no aware of my harsh words. "love doesn't wait until you find a good or bad person to meet! It's just happen as fast as light without warning, it doesn't matter of the person or his life, it's happen despite you!" he explained as he told me his true condition.

"I DON'T WANT TO HEAR ANY MORE LIES! Just…let us walk in different ways…I don't want this love to grow...anymore!" he flickered his eyes with lots of trauma! "WHY? GIVE ME ONE REASONABLE REASON? I WON'T LET YOU GO THIS EASYLY AFTER I FIND YOUR TRUE FEELING!...we didn't start yet!!" he shouted. "I don't want to hear anything, please leave a good impression of you in me" I took a deep breath then I added. "I trusted you,….and until now I trust you…beside the fact that I have fallen for you, I don't want to know what is between you and yuri…I don't want to break my heart, please! Let's stop this right now"

"UEE-SSHI!" he grabbed my both arms powerfully with his cut face closer to mine. "who told you? What did you hear? Tell me? TELL ME WHO TOLD YOU?" "no one, but I know…I have this strange feeling from the beginning! So please, I don't want this trust and love to disappear with hates…so that I told you to depart!" he left my arms all at once hopelessly. "I will leave you guys by tomorrow!" I made him again large his eyes double. "what? If you want to prevent this love, then I won't force you to keep it, but…where will you go with a horrible situation that you're in??? are you insane?"

I wanted to tell him about what Jay gave me early this day, but I backed. "I sol…everything fine, I will go to my brother" I lied to him a stupid lie! he didn't reply, he was angry enough that his eyes turned to be red!! His lips, he was biting it with all his might! "thank you…it may that I won't say a proper good bye to the other…but at least…for you, I have to admit that you did a lot of things to me! I won't be thankless, I'm really happy until this moment to meet someone like you." I raised my hand to touch his cut face slightly then I immediately dropped it down. I smiled…but there was no feeling either, I didn't feel anything! Why? Am I really lost my sense???

I turned my body and headed to go to the house after this long and long conversation. Suddenly, he caught my arm and turned me despite me strongly to his chest…and hugged me deeply. He almost took my breath away by his strong hug. I didn't raise my hands to exchange his hug, but I was standing without even any emotion in my face. "am I that easy to you? You want to leave me…this fast? After you made me crazy about you…you are planning to leave me like that?" he asked while his voice held lots of sadness that I have ever heard, held lots of upset! I felt each word he said…cause this was my true feeling too. I didn't want to leave him…but, I have to.

I wanted to hug him, but there was something prevent me to! Despite that, I raised my hands and surrounded his back and caught it roughly. My face rest on his shoulder. "I'm sorry!" I said with a regretful voice. I wanted to stay with him! I wanted so badly to spend my whole life with him…but I didn't want to break my heart again! it's something you can't forget this easily! It's very hurtful! Painful! Troublesome! I hugged him back cause I knew it would be our last…hug!!

I pushed him away gently, then I bowed a little to him then I ran, I ran until I reached the house. I jumped on my bed then…my eyes started to release a sea of tears, a lot of burning…all the emotions that weren't appeared there, they all gathered in this room, on this bed. My heart hurt me to death, I thought that I lost my sense, but my thoughts were wrong. I was pressing myself not to cry and not to appear any overacting reaction! I didn't think that it will hurt me like that! I spent almost 2 hours crying without a small break!

A knocking made me back to my sense! I raised my head which was buried under the pillow. I wiped my tears but they refused to stop and the moan either! I was barely breath! The door opened slowly as I didn't give a permission to enter! "OMO! I heard your voice! Are you ok? What's wrong? Is there something bothering you? Did someone hurt you?" question after question! She came closer and held my hand and touched my face and raised it with her hands. She tried to wipe my tears then I pushed her away roughly. "OMO!! What's wrong?" she asked again. she annoyed me and she didn't close the door after entering the room! She made me lost my control! "please leave me alone!" I told her with a strict voice, hoped she understand what I meant by that tone!

"honey!! I can't, let's go to hospital!  Come on, I will tell OPPA! Or anyone awake here…" "STOP IT! I'M NOT ILL!! GO OUT! JUST LEAVE ME!" I scolded her with lots of anger! She wide her eyes, I bet that she wasn't accustomed with shouting and scolding, which made me uneasy. She slowly gathered the tears in her eyes which froze me. I'm not that type which make others cry! I'm not like that at all…but she was totally annoying! Her tears fell down silently 'AISH, SHE IS SENSTIVE!! MORE THAN ME!!!!!!' I shouted inside. After seeing her crying, I forgot that I was crying too. Jang su was standing at the sill of the door which shocked me and made me feel guilty. "OPPA!!" she ran and hugged him. "I didn't mean anything! She scolded me, but I wanted to help…" she cried even louder after telling her story to her OPPA! Dongahe showed his head as he wanted to see what happened!

"that's enough, she didn't mean anything…stop crying now!" Jang su dabbed her back while his eyes held lots of anger. Well, she is his sis after all! "what? What? Why are you crying at this time?" donghae asked hyuri with a suspicious eyes. She moved away from Jang su and went toward donghae. "she…" "I told you, that's enough!" Jang su interrupted her. I bite my lips as hard as I could. This GIRL came in a wrong time, in a very wrong time! "you didn't change! You always cry after a silly thing!" donghae told her these words and went to his room while yawing loudly. He didn't even hear what happened and gave her his judge? But he was right somehow, after all, she really…a crybaby! "donghae-sshi!!" she was frustrated by his words. Actually, he said what I wanted to say! Jang su pulled hyuri's hand and went out while slamming the door. She was overacting, I couldn't believe that her ages over 20s!! and what? She wanted to be a writer? Good thing to be by this manner!!!!

I heard noises outside the next day, but my body was drugged and I couldn't carry myself! But these noises were unusual at all! It was like screaming, I didn’t' think that hyuori would shout like that!! And the strange voice was away from hyuori's voice too. I jumped from my bed and wore my glove, then opened the door and ran to where these voices were but my steps stopped when I saw a new face that I didn't get to see here! And our both eyes contacted, the silence covered the place when I appeared. Siwon, hyuori, Jang su, Donghae and I with this unusual face…and the war started…!!!

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enjoy <3

see you tomorrow with the final chapter =D

the final chap is a little bit longer than usual, so, I'll divided it to two chapters =)

I hope you enjoyed the story up till now and I hope you will love the ending too *praying*

what about leaving comments here xD?? I really really want to know your thoughts about this story  =D

thank you again for your support ~