Chapter 24

My shirt slopped which showed a little my shoulder and my back. I looked at it which my burned was very clearly to him. I hided my shoulder then looked at him under the rain with a very nervous look! "there is nothing" he took a step forward to me and wanted to take off my shirt but I prevent him by pushing his hand powerfully "I said…there is NOTHING!" the situation got so confused to me. Did he see it? Did he know what it was? He looked at my hand…my glove-hand, then slowly raised his eyes to my shoulder then to my face. "was it the same thing on your back…on your hand?" my heart was beating strongly, I couldn't breathe very well! Why it was him? Why he was the one who saw it? I left him behind without saying a word!

I ran in front of Siwon and Jang su while I was totally wet. I put my hand on my face trying to prevent myself from crying! I closed my room's door as strong as I could. I sloped slowly after entering the room behind the door. I cried out loud! Why? Was it really fair to happen all these things in the same day? I caught my shirt toughly, my heart hurting me to death. I couldn't breathe very well! Crying and crying and crying…that was the only thing that I know! I hate myself for not knowing to act properly! I hate myself to let these thoughts destroyed me every single minute! My body was freezing and chilly, I dabbed it warmly but the chill didn't decrease but it was increasing each second. What if he told them? OMG!...

After 2 days, I was able to show my face to them. They were knocking the door before, they wanted me to go out…but I couldn't reply to anyone, I was totally collapsed, until this day. I wanted to spend times with myself. I went out but as usual, there were no one at the living room. I harried out to meet gun woon, but before that I called the hospital. They told me that he let him off this morning! I stopped my steps then hang up the phone! "I can't call him nor go to his home! That's absolutely no way!" I stood at my place for awhile then walked aimlessly! I think it's started to be my job from now on…walking aimlessly!

I wanted to go to the sea but I remembered that this place no longer a good for me! I changed my mind and went to the park! It was the only place that didn't hold strange memories! It was night and of course there were no one at it. I sat on the couch, but something inside my heart bunched me and told me to go back home…to go back right now! I didn't know why this idea stuck in me, but I followed my heart and…I ran to home, as quick as I could! "I hope there is nothing happen, I don't want to hear any bad news anymore!" I ran until I reached the home. There were no sounds which made me worried more! I opened the door quietly and slowly, but the shock thing was….

The house was missed up and SIWON, DONGHAE and JANG SU, they were tied with a rope all around each other! I harried to them but Jang su waved his head like he told me to not come close! I didn’t listen to him. My feet carried me to where they were. The most injured one was donghae who totally fainted! "what happened? OMG!" I tried to lift the rope around Jang su, but he was tying strongly. "what are you doing? Run away! They are still here!" I didn't pay attention to what he said, I tried to lift it once again. Then I changed my way to where donghae was, then I tried to lift his rope with all my might! "I did it!"

I lifted the rope which was tying donghae strongly, then he fell toward me. I caught him, he was totally bleeding! Beneath his mouth, his cheeks and his hand! "Jang su-sshi! What should I do?" he couldn't turn because of his rope, so I made donghae supine on the ground gently then tried to lift the rope around Jang su again. "listen, forget me…take donghae outside before they coming! Hurry..can you?" I looked at his eyes sincerely, his face was bleeding too! My heart hurt me when I saw him like that. "what about you guys? What will you do?" I looked at siwon once then I changed my sight to Jang su again. "hurry…please…they want to hurt donghae, it's better to help him first, they don't want us!"

I nodded to him with hesitating. I tried to carry donghae by putting his arm around my shoulders. I pulled him slowly until I reached the door, he was heavy! He was fainted! I peeked at Jang su and siwon once, then I opened the door but there was someone behind it which frightened me! he was huge enough to kill us! He pushed me powerfully inside, and donghae who was leaning on me fell down hardly! I harried to donghae and tried to help him but the man carried him away! I followed him and hit him with all my might. It seemed to me that he didn't get injured by my hitting! But I kept hit him over and over again! "let him off…I'm warning you!" he dropped donghae which this drop made a strong sound "DONGHAE!" Jang su shouted. I turned to Jang su who was suffering. I tried to pull donghae inside. "what do you want from him? Are you crazy? Let them go!! If you touched him again, I will kill you!" I shouted at him but it seemed that it didn't affect him…at all!

He was looking at me with a worried look while I pulled donghae faraway from him. After few seconds, 4 of his friends surrounded us. My heart was pumping up. To tell the truth, I was afraid to death! They kept looking at me strangely. "this is the same girl who didn't give us the documents, it seems that she is the lawyer, BOSS" one of them said to the huge man! But his voice was familiar to me…OMG! It was the same as the 4 men in black who attacked me last time! Were they trying to get revenge?

He sat down and looked directly to my face, then he touched my jaw and turned it right to left "so…you're that girl who face those men? Are you that brave? Hmm?" "TOOK OFF YOUR HAND, NOW!" Jang su shouted at him which made him angry. Just one move from his finger, one of his men walked by and kicked Jang su in his stomach with all his might which made him cough! "JANG SU! what are you doing?" I wanted to go to him but he grabbed my arm and didn't let me move one step! Then slowly, Jang su fell down with his rope tying him! When I saw him like that…I didn't know what this strange feeling that exist me. I saw the huge man in front of me then I SLAPPED him hardly. One of his men wanted to kick me but he raised his hand like if he prevented him from moving further.

"do you know what you did…just right now?" he asked me. I looked at him with a very afraid eyes, I couldn't hide my frightens, I'm not good at it anyway! I changed my sight to where Jang su supine. Then I looked at siwon who was totally in the other world. Like if he didn't believe what happened to us or the pain returned to him! That's why he kept silence all this time! "what do you want exactly? You hit them…you punished them…what do you want more?" I said with a shaky voice. He stood then again ordered them by pointing out his finger. 2 out of the 4 men harried to donghae but I ran to cover him, to lay over him. "you will not take him anywhere! Unless I die!" where from this courage came out? I know that I put myself in a position that I will not get envy by! "it's better to move, I'm warning you…I forgive your slap, but if you don't move…you'll regret it" he said with a strict voice which made my heart beating strongly. "go…away, leave…me" donghae's voice suddenly exist my ear! I was happy to hear him yet horrified. I didn't move and pretended not hearing anything.

Suddenly, a huge hand placed on my shoulder and pulled me which made me fell strongly at the ground. "I warned you…you have to pay for your fake brave!" he was moving toward me slowly and put a small smile on his face. I stood then harried to catch the phone. "If you move any longer, you will regret it too!" I pressed the police number then I showed to him to make him afraid…but as usual, nothing made him move! I touched the green button, then he jumped over me which made me lost my control and dropped the phone away. I shouted to let the police hearing my appeal. "HELP! THEY ARE ATTACKING US, THEY WILL KILL US" "CLOSE THAT PHONE CALL YOU FOOL" he shouted at them while holding my both hands on the ground. Then they all gathered around the phone and broke it! He raised his hand and wanted to hit my face. "you will forget your name you…." All of a sudden, the sound of cracking made him fell down on me…he fainted. The blood covered my shirt. I looked at the vase which broke over his head. It was placing on the shelf above us. I pushed him away, then all of the 4 men surrounded me. "I told you before, don't I? I hate girls who claims courageous!"

I stood and looked at his face who I couldn't see before because of his mask! I mocked him "I will tell you that and keep it in your mind…I hate GANGESTRS!" when I told him that, he went all angry and moved very close to me. I looked at the fat man who fainted just because of small vase, then I looked at donghae who couldn't move at all. "before I hit your head, but now I will stick this knife inside! Do you want to try how it feels?" he warning me and got closer to me for each word. I backed slowly, then I ran but he held my arm and pushed me to the wall, he tried to stick the knife in my chest.

I kept defining myself but he held me strongly, and his friend helped him and prevented me from moving. I was breathing separately. "do you want to say your last words?" he laughed. "STAY AWAY! LEAVE HER YOU COWARD!" Jang su shouted at him while supine. One of the men was holding Jang su and hit his face, and the other one holding siwon while two of them facing me! He didn't pay attention to what jang su said. "it's better if you ran away now! the police will come, do you want to spend your life in the prison?" they all laughed out loud then the man slowly stuck the knife in my chest like if he was hesitating! I opened my eyes not believing what he did.

Was this the end to me? will I die now? why the time moving very slow? NO, I don't want to die now!!. another cracking sound happened which made him took off his knife and fell down. I caught my shirt then slopped slowly. The man turned his head to see who did that to him, he was fully angry! I was shocked when I saw donghae standing shakily couldn’t control himself. The other man who was near me ran toward donghae then the man who stabbed me followed him with his back of his head bleeding. When the four of them surrounded donghae he fell down and fainted!! I wanted to go to him, I was shaking to death. they wanted to beat him or should I say that they wanted to kill him?……  

but the sound of the police cars made them backed. They were nervous and looked at each other. They tried to carry their boss but they were too late. The policemen broke the place and captured the gang! They also sent donghae to the hospital, when I told them about Jang su, he was already disappearing! I was too worried about him, I was shocked too! Where did he go at this time while he is not even well? I wanted to make sure that donghae's injury didn’t that bad. So, siwon and I, went to the hospital with him while leaving Jang su in nowhere! I didn't pay attention to my wound, it was light but it was hurting me deeply!

Donghae was sleeping, while the needle glucose in his hand. His face with a plasters over the bleeding places made me pity him and looked at him for awhile. Siwon was beside me and looked at donghae who his face almost like fainting not sleeping! I came closer to him and held his hand gently. "are you ok? Can you hear me?" he didn't do any reaction. I sighed then looked at siwon who stared at me. "you…have to go, staying here….will not help me" I turned my head to donghae with a big smile on my face. He was speaking while closing his eyes. "donghae-sshi! Are you really fine?" I asked him while holding his hand with my both hands. He nodded to me. "just go" he kept asking us to leave, so we just listened to what he wanted and left him.

We walked in the street, while siwon still in his own world! "what happened? Who were those people?" I asked him to break the silence, though, I knew already! "they were the same gang who attacked you before" I looked forward then I nodded to him. "what were they trying to do?" I asked again. He kept silence then after a few seconds he answered. "I discovered that I'm nothing, I can't do anything!" I stopped my steps when he said these words which made him stopped too. "what are you saying? No one could move or did anything! Could you see how they were all crazy and didn't even know why they were attacked you?! I'm glad that you didn't injured yourself!" he stared at me like he didn't believe my words!

"siwon-sshi, we all were in danger, thanks GOD that no one of you got serious injury…I'm not saying anything to keep you silence, but it's the true…." I stopped and tried to find some words will make him cheer up! "look…everything went as all we didn't want, we are doing things with all our might…don't say this trash again, understood?" I smiled at him which made him finally smile! I know that he didn't want to smile, but he smiled to make me close my mouth! I remembered suddenly Jang su's words. "Don't think about the others thought, be yourself…be who you really are, don't take their thought very seriously…Because you have your intention…and it's lead you to the right way…" thinking about him made my wound hurt me more, even when I treated it! Frankly, they didn't demand any identity to treat me! it was probably one of my luckiest day.

"look at my cloth! I have to go to the home right now!" I said jokingly but he just smiled at me.

We walked until we were near the park. I peeked at it as usual, but the unusual thing that… I heard voices. A strict voice came out from it. My curious didn’t leave me as it a habit of me. siwon caught my shoulder "where are you going at this time?" "aren't you hearing something inside?" I looked at him with full of curious. We walked slowly to know the source of this strange sound. I was surprised enough to stop my steps. I was shocked till my head was hurting me, till my heart hurting me to death, till my eyes went all teary…AGAIN! Jang su was sitting on the couch while hiding his face and…CRYING! This was my first time seeing him crying. This scene was horrible and frightened me more than the gang thing!

I was looking at him, staring at him directly. "What should…we do…to him?" I asked siwon without feeling of myself, without feeling of my mouth that was opened! "it would be better if we leave him" he grabbed my arm to make me left with him but I took off my arm and walked forward to Jang su without paying attention to Siwon. "he is suffering! He is by himself all this time, he spend enough time with himself!" I said while walking toward him. Siwon again grabbed my arm and stopped my steps which turned my body to him. "let him stay alone! Let's go" I looked at him strangely, didn't believe that it was siwon who told me to leave him in such a difficult situation. "if you want to go, then go…I'll stay with him" I walked to Jang su and left siwon behind. I didn't turn my head to see if siwon left or still at his place.

I walked until I'm closed to Jang su. He didn't feel me around him, he hided his face with his both hands. I was standing shakily and teary! Looking at him losing himself like that made my heart cut into pieces! "JANG SU-SSHI!" he raised his head slowly then turned it to me. his eyes was red enough to show me that he was in a big pain…but, WHY? When he saw me he wiped his tears then changed his sight. "what are you doing here?" he said with a separate breathe. I sat beside him and stared at his face with those teary eyes, my tears refused to fall and I didn't know why! My hand went to his face smoothly, it was pale and held some wounds! I couldn't stand seeing him like that at all!

He held my hand then pushed it away. "leave me alone, didn't you hear him? I don't want anyone right now!" so he was hearing our conversation back there! He heard it!

 Someone told me before, 'if someone told you to leave him, then be sure that he needs you' "your face, you have to treat it…" "YAH! are you duff?" he stood then wanted to leave me but I grabbed his hand quickly. "even if you wanted me to leave you, I will not do what you want…I'll stay here…. beside you, you need me!" I grabbed his hand strongly when I told him these sincere words. He looked at me while his eyes held his tears, I could feel him trying to hold those tears back. "who you think you are? I don’t need you! Don't make yourself joke!" I know that he didn't mean it, I just thought about it that way, even though, my heart hurting! I didn't let off his hand but he pushed me again which that hurt my wound a little! I caught my shirt for awhile, but I didn’t show any pain and still followed him and trying to prevent him from staying alone.

He stood suddenly which made me stopped either. "will you leave me?!" he didn't turn his body or even his head, he was totally angry…or should I say, collapsed? "you are good at holding back your anger, but I don't see this right now!" he sighed for what I said. "you said that I didn't care of my health…..you said that I'm stubborn….you said to me that I have to talk to someone….YOU SAID TO ME THAT YOU HATE SEEING ME CRYING!!! DON'T YOU REMEMBER?" I lost control of myself . The words went by itself! He didn't turn to see me which made me lost my control even more! "WHAT ABOUT YOU? YOU'RE SO MEAN! SO MEAN! HOW COULD YOU TREAT YOURSELF LIKE THAT?"

He slowly showed to me his face while the tears cling in my eyes. "what do you want after this nonsense shouting? I heard what you want…can you leave me now? HOW COULD YOU STAY WITH SOMEONE MEAN?" he was so chilly, so cold…his personality changed so fast! I wanted to slap him…but WHY? "why are you acting like that? I will not move unless you with me!" I paused then added "do you remember who told me these words?..." I looked directly at his eyes. "I'm the person who will stop in front of you when you want to do hilarious things…that's what I want to do you!" he opened his eyes widely, shocked of what I said! "I know why you are suffering alone, I know why you didn't want to treat yourself….I know what is going on in your mind…please don't hurt yourself…OPPA!" we both opened our eyes when this STUPID word came out. I couldn't believe that I spelled it out…so easily like that! "what…..did you say?" he asked me with lots of wonder! I was staring at him and finally the tears that refused to fall…fell down hardly, with lots of burning inside me! I couldn't open my mouth nor breathe well.

I wanted to leave the place, what an embarrass situation to stay at! He grabbed my arm gently then asked the same question over and over again! "what…did you say?" he stared at my eyes while his face near mine! "no…thing!" I pushed him away then wiped the tears. "let's go, probably siwon-sshi waiting for us…lonely at home!" I said with a strict voice then slowly I saw him changed upside down. I didn't dare to hold his hand and pulled him after me, but I did! what should I do to make him return?

We entered the living room while siwon in his room…it might be like that. "sit here, don't move! understood?" "why you didn’t go to see if siwon is here or not" even when he was in a bad mood he didn't let his teases away! I ignored him then knocked siwon's door, when I opened it, he was fell asleep! I closed the door quietly. "he is sleeping!" he smiled a little then changed his sight! "treat me outside, the weather is nice!" was he ordering me? I looked at him with a confused gaze! He stood then pointing to the backyard. "stop! Where do you think…" he didn't let me finish my speech then went out!

He was sitting crossing his legs and swinging it, seeing him thinking aimlessly and looking down made my heart suffer again! But when he felt me he raised his head with a small smile…he is good at pretending and really, he is good at holding back his anger or his bad mood! "it's your opportunity to take your revenge!" he laughed then looked down at his legs. I saw his legs which had also a small wound! "I'm not like you, MEAN!" I put the medicine on the cotton but before I placed it on his cheek he said. "you are good at teasing me! but be careful…I may lose my temper all up sudden!" 

He was trying to tease me too! So I put the cotton powerfully at his cheek! "YAAAH! ARE YOU CRAZY?" "see! It's hurting, isn't it? You have to feel how it's painful!" he touched his cheek with upset face then looked at me like really someone lost his temper. " you said that you're not like me? huh! I don't want your help, are you trying to kill me?" "don't act like a child! When you did that to me, I didn't say anything!" I took off his hand then put the cotton on his cheek. "don't scream, cause if you did, I will hit you instead of donghae!" I was imitating his voice when he told me this sentence before! He looked at me with impatient look, which I always trying to avoid. I put the plaster on his cheek.

I changed the cotton with another one to treat the wound beneath his mouth. When I placed the cotton at it, I was hesitating and shaking. "what's wrong? Is it that bad?" he asked me then I denied it with a strange feeling! I kept looking at the wound aimlessly. "YAH!" when he shouted, I treated it fast and put the plaster on it. "finish!" I still shaking, I didn't know why! "my leg!" he looked down at his leg then he raised it "look, there is a wound here" I looked at him like –are you kidding me?- "even the kid will not concern about this small wound! Are you trying to be funny?" I got hyper suddenly which surprised him. "wooow woow, calm…calm down! I didn't say that you have to treat it! If that will make you upset, then, don't do it!!!" "go inside and take some rest, your face need more sleep!" I demanded from him. He ignored me and looked at the sky, I was standing in front of him, but he ignored me.

I sat down impatiently then held his leg which frightened him. "what is this?" I grabbed his leg strongly and looked at him with a hateful look!! Well…it was just like that! Then I put a small plaster on it. "are you satisfied now?" I asked him while trying to stand. He nodded to me like a child, then he again looked at the sky! he pointed to me to sit near him while his eyes placed at the sky! I stayed beside him. "what are you thinking of?" I asked him.

-you surprised me…you really do!

I looked at him all at once.

-what do you….mean? or….why?

-you said each single word I told you! I didn't expect you to keep it in your mind like that!

-well…

-you are brilliant at conservation, am I that effective to you? I didn't know that before!

-don't make it like if you're really impacted me by your useless words! I just say it because….because….

-useless words? HUH! And you didn't even know why you told me that? Are you by any chance…drunk? AISH!

Immediately, I remembered him when he was fully drunk, which made me frustrated!

-the point of this was to make you return and to treat your wound…there was nothing, so don't imagine things are not reality!

My voice showed to him how I was pissed off! I remembered his craziness, I wanted to erase this incident, but I couldn't. he didn't answer nor did any reaction. I kept silence and wanted him to open new conversation or I will go to my room instead of staying like that!! I looked at him once then I looked at the sky once.

-you surprised me…you really do!!

-AGAIN? Why now? is it because I treated you?

- you were brave, I didn't imagine someone like you would be brave like that! I know you are stubborn and almost killed yourself because of what you wanted to do…but…you impacted me!

I felt like if he praised me! well, he did! I smiled ear to ear without feeling of this idiot smile! I bowed my head then I came back to my sense. I released voices to show him how I'm proud of myself, then I turned my face to him with a small smile which made him smiled too!

-well…now donghae-sshi owe me something!

-what something?

-they broke my cell phone! I want him to buy me new one!

-you LITTLE PUNK! I will buy you one!

-NO…I want donghae-sshi…

-what is this now? are you trying to get some attention?

-don't underestimate me…even though, I know he will buy me one!

-I get it!

-don't tell him anything! I know you didn't keep anything in your mouth! Be careful, I want him to do that by himself!

-well well well!!! Why your judge always so nice to me?!

-you didn't close your mouth when my brother wanted to die! You told siwon-sshi immediately!!

-that was different case! I…

-what?

He sighed then ignored me.

-I told him because I wanted him to go with you….I had work that day!

-I will believe you!

-you will? You HAVE!

I put my tongue out my mouth to . I remembered him standing with yuri…was that the work he meant? I don't want to know, and I won't ask either. Everything related to yuri is so complicated and depressing me.

-how did you treat yourself?

-they didn't demand anything, she put a plaster and then…finish!

-is it hurting you? That BASTERED! He could kill you by that move!

-I know! But thanks GOD, everything ok right now, the most injured one is donghae-sshi!

His face changed upside down, I could feel his pain just by looking at his eyes. I didn't mean to make him felt as it was his fault! He needsto understand the situation!

-what's wrong?

I asked like if I didn't know what happened to him! Seriously, my voice showed to him how I pity him! I'm a big stupid on this earth!! He didn't answer me and sunk in his thoughts…actually, his bad thoughts!

-I don't want to say this, and I know that I did all what I can! But it's hurting me to death! seeing him like that, I felt like I betrayed his father!

he suddenly spoke with lots of pain! I felt it by his voice. I pitied him so much, he thought about his father and how much he cares about donghae! Was he pushing himself like that because he wanted to punish himself? I didn't say a word to him, I just looked at his face.

-before several years, I promised…

-I know! I know the whole thing!

He looked at me with his red eyes, like –who told you?-

-I told you, I know why you wanted to be alone, why you refused to treat yourself! And I truly feel how it's hard on you! But…he needs you, he needs you now more than before!

-I….know!

-you helped him…you were able to sacrificed yourself for him! What do you call this? Was this betraying? You could die today! And you didn't even think about it! All your thought gone to donghae-sshi! Was this betraying? Please, don't be like this…it's not Jang su-sshi who I knew!

He changed his sight while I took a deep breath…the words went out one after one! I wanted him to erase all his bad thoughts and I tried to stop him blaming himself for no reason! I didn't know if I did that in a good way or not…the atmosphere suddenly got worried! So I wanted to make the atmosphere went up again…

-I…I'm very tired, you tired me, would you thank me at least?!

-thank you!

-what a dry voice! Say it loudly, I didn’t hear anything…what did you say?

-stop it now…you heard it already!

He put a small smile on his face while I was playing with my voice…and I think it worked out!!

-that's great, you smiled. Your face is better now…I can look at it immediately!

-hehehe…FUNNY!!

I laughed at his expression! He is actually good at making hilarious faces! I have to admit that he is good at many things…teasing people and making hilarious faces!

I stood to go inside. The time went too fast while I didn't feel it! I bowed to him gently then I walked "did you mean what you said back there?" I didn't turn myself but my steps stopped when he talked. He came in front of me then asked me again. "did you mean it?" I pretended like I didn't get what he said…but indeed, I know what he meant, and that what I wanted to avoid! "what...?" I looked at him innocently then he looked at me doubtfully. "you are good at acting!!" he smiled then added "when you said to me…" "I got it!! I got it!! Don't say it! I DIDN'T MEAN ANYTHING, IT'S…JUST…WELL, I….OK!! I GOT IT!! THERE IS NOTHING!" I interrupted him and I lost controlling myself, the world suddenly got so small in my eyes! I was so afraid and actually…SHY! I walked by him and harried inside to my room!! What a good night greeting! Was I meant it by any chance? I kept asking myself the same question. AAHHHH EMBARRASSING!  EMBARRASSING!!

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