Don't you dare skip straight to the end. Don't spoil yourselves. Savor every word of this. This is the last. Small details are what make your troubles go away. Have fun...if you'll like it.

---

 

 

 

How can I move on if I’m still in love with you?

- The Man Who Can’t Be Moved, The Script

 

 

 

~*~

On her every movement were eyes locked to observe like it was all a dream. She smiled, he smiled inwardly like an idiot. She laughed, he would lower his head and smile – because there had always been something contagious about the way her lips thinned and stretched and formed into a crescent. It was like everything about her had a great impact on him one way or the other. Kai would sometimes wonder if he had not met Seyoon at all, would everything be the same.

 

Would he feel hurt like this when she smiled to another man but him?

 ~*~

 

 

Epilogue (part 2); _{give me a sign, x or o}

 

 

The father and son were doing very well on their second day of bonding experience. Everything seemed to be on the right track except that…

“I don’t like.”

“Come on. Just one bite.”

“I don’t like.”

“You can’t watch ‘Pororo and Sons’ if you won’t take a bite of your food.”

“But appa…”

“But Jongin…”

“Appa…”

“Jongin…”

If staring contest was what they’d have to do, Kai was willing to do it. But the more he stared at his son with his cutely knitted eyebrows and pouting lips, he would probably lose. Why does he have to resemble his mother with his facial expressions?

Ring.

“Eomma!”

“Yah, Kim Jongin, come back here!” How weird it was calling his own name. 

---

“Hey!”

“How did you two get in?”

“The door is open – duh.”

“Whatever.” Kai slumped on the dining chair leaving Chanyeol and Luhan curious and confused.

“Let me guess. Parenting problem?” Chanyeol pulled out a chair and sat beside Kai who was stabbing the ‘food’ quote and unquote because in Chanyeol’s opinion, it didn’t look like food at all.

“I think I know the problem. What’s that?” Luhan asked.

“Food,” Kai replied. “I prepared it this morning but Jongin doesn’t want to take even a single bite.” He scowled because he never felt so hurt before. He tried at least and he wanted Jongin to appreciate his appa’s effort but the little boy had turned his back on him with the best excuse possible.

“And you call that food? Jongin won’t really take a bite of that. It might bite him back.”

Kai shot Chanyeol a glare. Sometimes he wondered if Chanyeol was really his friend.

“Speaking of your son, where is he?”

“Hm, he got my phone and went upstairs. He’s probably talking to Gayoon now. I asked Seyoon to tell Gayoon to call him this morning.”

“Oh,” Chanyeol nodded and Luhan started stabbing the food on Jongin’s plate.

“He probably misses her.”

“Yeah…”

“Appa! Appa!” Jongin went down stairs so hastily that Kai almost panicked. He didn’t like Jongin ignoring the food he prepared for him but he wouldn’t forgive himself if something happened to his son.

“Don’t run too fast. Why?”

“Eomma wants to talk to you,” said the boy with a big grin plastered on his face. He gave back his father’s phone before facing Chanyeol and Luhan on the table. “Uncle Chanyeol! Uncle Luhan!”

“Hey bud! Wassup!” Jongin giggled as he raised his arms so Chanyeol could pick him up and let him sit on his lap. The three observed Kai who distanced himself a little while talking to Jongin’s mom on the phone. They watched him as he pouted, talking something about being confident with his cooking skills and so on.

“I already tasted it, I swear – Why won’t you believe – But – Fine…”

Chanyeol only smiled. Kai was definitely someone who wouldn’t defend himself if it was a battle against the boy’s mom. They heard Kai heaved a deep sigh before going back to the dining room.

“Where do you want to eat?” he asked with a scowl

Chanyeol, Luhan, and Jongin smiled and gave each other high fives.

---

“Grandma!”

“Omo! Look who’s here,” Mrs. Kim spread her arms to capture running Jongin in a hug.

“We just have our breakfast in a restaurant near here so we decided to pay a visit.”

“Well that’s very kind of you my son.”

Jongin struggled himself out of his grandma’s affectionate yet bone-crushing hug before running outside the office room. Chanyeol and Luhan automatically ran after him. Kai watched them leave before turning back to his mother who seemed rather busy with paper works.

“You looked busy. Maybe it’s not the right time to visit you. Where’s dad?”

“Your father went abroad for another business trip. We’re all busy here, that’s right, but this is only one-fourth of the work that I’m supposed to do. Suho’s been insisting that he’ll take care of the rest. The Jins have been a great help. We’re just lucky that their eldest son is too kind to accept the duty as the general manager. Ever since you and Seyoon back out from the marriage and company matters, we have to find a suitable one for the executive job.”

“Mom, we’re done with that subject, right?”

“I know but I’m still hoping that my son will be one of the stockholders of the company. Or at least, have a significant role in the company.”

Kai sighed and went to seat on the arm rest of his mother’s huge arm chair, bending his body a little to hug his mom. “You know that I’m a dance major right? I’m not in for calculations and business strategies. Besides, aren’t you happy that I already give you a cute grandson?”

“Of course I am and maybe little Jongin could be the future president of our company.”

“No can do, mom.”

“Alright,” his mother chuckled. “I’m just kidding. Now, go ahead and look for your son. Manager Chen isn’t here to go and look for him again like the last time.”

“Love you, mom.”

---

Kai looked for the trace of Chanyeol, Luhan and Jongin. They might be his friends but trusting Jongin to them was the least option of all. Who knew what those two might teach his kid. He walked down a narrow hallway when he heard giggles from one of the rooms. He didn’t bother to look at the name plate on the door when he entered, seeing Chanyeol and Luhan fighting to sit on a swivel chair while Jongin clapped in amusement.

“What are you doing? Stop that. We don’t even know whose room is this.”

“Appa is a killjoy,” said Chanyeol in which Jongin and Luhan nodded affirmatively. Kai swayed his head.

“Come here. Let’s go home.”

 

“The business meeting is set next week. We should go out and have some fun,” they heard a voice reaching the door. The four remained static in place with Jongin holding his appa’s hand tightly.

“I don’t know. We still have to go to New York on Friday and—” the person stopped his track upon opening the door when he saw four people inside. The person behind him groaned as he bumped into the man on the door.

“Why did you stop walking, Kris?”

Kris smirked as he leaned against the door and folded his arms, gesturing his head towards the four. Suho looked at the direction of his stare and widened when he saw Kai, Jongin, Luhan, and Chanyeol, who was slowly returning the swivel chair back to its place.

---

“How’s work, hyung?”

Suho sighed as he sat beside Kai on the sofa. His swivel chair was currently ridden by Jongin while Chanyeol, Luhan, and Kris tried to play with him. “It’s piling a lot but I am trying to survive it,” he smiled at Kai.

Kai replied with an awkward smile. His mother was right; Suho was too kind to accept a job in their company but he couldn’t blame himself or Seyoon. Working in the company wasn’t really their calling.

“How’s it being a father?” Suho asked all of sudden.

“Hm…Exhausting but exhilarating at the same time,” Kai replied in which Suho could see the genuineness in Kai’s voice and smile. The boy that he used to give advices before when they were still young was now a responsible father. Maybe he could ask for Kai’s advice when he would have his own child someday.

“That’s great.” Both of their gazes landed on Jongin who was laughing hard as Kris tickled him. “He laughs like you.”

“Really?”

Suho hummed in affirmation. “Your eyes disappear when you smile.”

“Just like you, hyung.”

Suho smiled. “By the way, are all ready to go to New York this Friday?”

Kai nodded. “We’ve already packed our luggage. Eli sent us the tickets last Monday.”

“I hope the wedding goes well. Seyoon is pretty much excited about it. She just called me yesterday.”

“Ah…that’s good. She actually called me yesterday, asking if the tux she sent for Jongin fits.”

“Did it fit?”

“Pretty much. He will be the ring bearer anyway.”

 

 

 

~*~

“This is ddeokbokki. The one in New York is far from perfection compared to this.”

“Really?”

Kai glared with watchful eyes as Seyoon passed the ddeokbokki cup to Eli. He didn’t like the way their fingers brushed in that short contact. And he didn’t like the fact that he was just walking behind Seyoon instead of walking beside her. Maybe, he shouldn’t have agreed to come to their so called Korean food tour – because they said that Eli wanted to taste the food that represented his Korean roots. But Seyoon’s pleading eyes when she asked them was too persuasive. He always failed to fight the temptation back.

“I hate him,” he whispered to Chanyeol.

“Who? Eli? Why?”

“Why? Do you like him?”

“Are you kidding me?”

Kai smiled. He knew that he and Chanyeol had the same views on things related to Seyoon. He was sure that his giant friend understood him too.

“He is like the best person ever!” Chanyeol squealed like a girl. They were just lucky that the rest of their friends were busy tasting food in the other food stalls, and Eli and Seyoon were seemed too busy to even notice them.

“What?”

“He’s great man. We’ve talked a lot yesterday about music-related things. Ask Yixing. I am sure he has the same opinion. Besides, his Korean accent is funny and cute too.”

No way. Has Chanyeol gone blind? Probably the effect of the ice cream that Kyungsoo had asked them to taste. Whenever their restaurant would put something to their menu, Chanyeol and Xiumin would always be the food tester. Yeah, it’s probably that.

Kai went back to stare at Seyoon and Eli when his eyes locked with Seyoon. He tried to blink multiple times but each time he opened his eyes, he would see Seyoon looking at him…smiling. He was having inner battles whether he was seeing reality or not that he didn’t notice Seyoon getting closer.

“This ddeokbokki reminds me of the one we always had in front of our school. Do you want to try it?”

Kai tried to feel Chanyeol’s hand beside him so he could ask for a nudge or a pinch just to make sure that Seyoon was really talking to him and that it was reality but to no avail, Chanyeol was already talking to Eli in one of the food stalls. So, he tried to bite his inner cheek instead and it hurt so much that he concluded it wasn’t a dream. It was taking him a lot of time to think of a reply that Seyoon already lowered the stick of the ddeokbokki and returned it to the cup.

“Sorry,” she mumbled. “You may not want to share the same stick. I’ll just get another one if you want.” Kai might or might not see that little flush of pink that tainted Seyoon’s cheek but he was sure he saw her lips pursed like she was disappointed or something. Kai quickly grabbed her wrist to stop her.

“No. It’s fine. I – I’ll take a…a bite.”

Seyoon lifted the stick to feed Kai which the other accepted while trying to stop the blood to flow to his cheeks. “It really tastes like the one in our school.”

Seyoon smiled back. Maybe going with this Korean food tour wasn’t a bad idea after all…

“Seyoon, let’s try the food there!” Eli suddenly shouted while waving and smiling to them.

…If only there weren’t any distraction.

~*~

 

 

 

After the company visit, Kai decided to bring Jongin to a nearby park, bringing Luhan, Chanyeol, and Kris with them. Suho couldn’t leave his work so he decided to stay.

“Jongin, if you will choose who’s the most handsome among the three of us, who do you think it is?” The three knew that kids didn’t lie so they took the opportunity to have Jongin as their living mirror on the wall.

“Hmm, I think it’s…Dragon-ahjussi!” Jongin gave Kris that nickname ever since Kris gave him that dragon plushie for his fourth birthday. It was Jongin’s most favorite one after Mr. Ace Jr.

Kris smiled as he secretly inserted a candy on Jongin’s pocket. The boy looked at him as he winked and smiled back. This kid could be his future disciple, he noted.

“How about the most fashionable?”

It wasn’t even a mere second when Jongin shouted, “Dragon-ahjussi!” He was feeling his pocket getting heavier.

“Yah! I see that!”

“What?”

“The candy!”

“What candy?”

Chanyeol unknowingly asked, “What candy is Luhan talking about?”

“I saw it when Kris put a candy on Jongin’s pocket!”

“What are you saying? Tell me, Jongin, did I put something in your pocket?”

Jongin swayed his head profusely.

“Really?” Luhan was slowly walking towards him. He was about to check his pocket when Kris immediately carried the kid. Jongin was holding on Kris for his dear life when Luhan and Chanyeol tried to tickle the two of them.

“Yah, stop it!” Kris shouted. “Alright, alright, ask Jongin one ultimate question and I won’t bribe him anymore.”

“It’s still unfair. We won’t stop not until Jongin promises to say the truth.”

“I promise Uncle Luhan. Please stop!” Jongin wouldn’t stop laughing.

“And if Kris promises that the point will go back to zero.”

“Fine!”

Luhan and Chanyeol let go of Kris and Jongin as the two tried to catch their breath. Kai just looked at them from afar. Kids...He swayed his head.

“Now tell me Jongin, among the three of us, who—”

That better be a good question, Kris looked at Chanyeol.

I’ll win, Luhan thought.

“—is the cutest?” Chanyeol asked out the blue in which Kris face palmed and thought that it was the lamest question ever – but inwardly, he was praying that Jongin would at least choose him. Unfortunately, he was out of candy. Luhan, on the other hand, was already mentally celebrating because he knew that Jongin would surely choose him. He knew he was manly but wouldn’t deny that he was also terribly cute.

“Hmm…”

The three heads get closer to Jongin. “It’s…Dragon-ahjussi!”

“Why?!” the other un-chosen two shouted.

“Because his gums appear when he smiles. He looks like our dog, Monggu!”

Luhan and Chanyeol suddenly burst into laughter while Kai tried to prevent his. Kris victory stance turned into a stern expression. And Jongin innocently smiled and started eating the candy that Kris gave him.

Genius.

---

“Appa, I’m thirsty.”

“You are?” Kai lifted Jongin as the kid nodded in reply. “Then, let’s go buy drinks from the vending machine.”

“I’ll come with you,” said Luhan.

“So, what flavor do you want?” Luhan bent his body to level with Jongin as the kid’s little finger traveled on the buttons. But he noticed that Jongin was torn between orange and persimmon flavor.

“Kris and I will have apple,” said Chanyeol, who popped out from behind.

“Jongin, make your choice. Your uncles are waiting for their turn,” said Kai.

Jongin tilted his head and pouted. Kai smiled. This scene seemed too familiar.

“I choose…orange!” Kai pressed the orange button as Jongin picked up the can and ran to the bench where Kris was sitting at. After that, Kai pressed the persimmon button.

“I thought you don’t like persimmon flavor,” asked Chanyeol.

“I don’t,” Kai smiled, “but…”

“Appa!” Jongin came back. “I change my mind. Can I have the persimmon instead?”

“Of course.” Kai opened the persimmon juice for his son and the kid went back to Kris again.

“How did you know?” Luhan asked in amazement. Kai just shrugged and drank the orange juice that Jongin gave back to him.

 

 

 

~*~

“So?”

“What ‘so’?”

“So—What are you going to do next Kim freaking coward Jongin?!”

“What did you just say?”

“Look, I’m being impatient here, Kai. If you don’t make a move and tell Seyoon that you love her—Yes, you love her and don’t protest—I’m going to…I’m letting Kyungsoo kick you on the crotch and I’ll ask Seyoon to marry me!”

“What? I thought you were over her.”

“Yeah? Do you think a chick magnet with a great face like me won’t have any girlfriend any time I want to? But I still don’t have any because I’m still hoping, Kai! I’m still hoping for Seyoon to like me back!”

“You are?” Chanyeol asked from somewhere.

Luhan gave him a ‘I’m just acting, you idiot!’ look before turning back to Kai. “Yes, I am. And, we don’t know when will Seyoon leave so if you really really,” Luhan’s gripped on Kai’s shoulder was too dramatically tight that he wanted to punch Luhan on the face, “really have the intention to keep her for the rest of your life, you should confess right now!”

“What shall I do?”

“Hm, I might have the solution for that,” said Chanyeol as he brought out a thick book – a very familiar one – from his bag.

“What’s that, a guidebook?”

“Yeah,” also known as, ‘Hundred and One Ways on How to Confess to Your Love One: Compiled Stories and Researched Methods’ by Love Guru, Park. If Seyoon didn’t use any method in this book, Chanyeol hoped that at least, Kai would. He still wanted to test if his methods were effective because Chanyeol was still one of the hoping ones.

 “Shall I rap for her then?”

Luhan face palmed himself while Chanyeol grinned widely. This would be the greatest confession ever, the giant thought.

---

“Do you enjoy your stay here so far?”

“Of course I do. I think you’ve do so much for me. I can’t even thank you enough.”

“Oh, you don’t have to. I am happy to bring you here and meet my family and friends.”

“You have great people around you. By the way, that Kai guy, isn’t he the person you’re supposed to…you know.”

“Yes, but that was already over. We really don’t need to talk about it.”

“Okay. But have you already told him about me, about us? I mean I still need to ask for his permission, you know.”

“I…I’m not sure how to tell him. It’s hard for me.”

“But you’re not planning to hide it forever, right? I mean, it is not something that you should hide from him.”

“No, of course not. It’s just that I think I need more time. He might be surprised. Besides, I am kind of…uhm…avoiding him these past two years.”

Eli sighed and went to seat beside Seyoon, draping his arm on her shoulder. “You don’t need to worry a thing. I’ll be there to support you.”

“Maybe I should tell him before we go back to New York.”

Eli nodded.

---

“Oh!”

“Why?”

“It’s Seyoon.” Chanyeol and Luhan looked at Kai in anticipation. “She wants me to meet her tomorrow.”

~*~

 

 

 

“Appa, where are we going?”

“We’re going to New York. Remember when you wear that tux suit with the tie?”

“The grown-up suit?”

“Yes, the grown-up suit. You’ll wear it there.”

“Our close friend is getting married, Jongin. That’s why they’re having you as the ring bearer,” said Kyungsoo. This day, he decided to distance Jongin from Chanyeol and Luhan. The last time they board a plane and let his son seat with those two dorks, Jongin almost threw up from too much laughing.

“Oh,” Jongin cooed. “But appa, you said that eomma is also in New York. Will we see her there?”

“Of course. We will.”

“I can’t wait to see her!” Jongin declared excitedly.

 

 

 

~*~

It had been two years but it still feel like high school once again as Kai observed Seyoon standing in front of the coffee shop where he and Seyoon decided to meet. Her hair had grown longer after two years but more than describing her as the epitome of a modest woman, Seyoon’s simplicity was what Kai liked about her the most.

“Have you waited for too long?” Kai noticed Seyoon’s surprised expression when he stealthily stood beside her. Ah, she might act like a grown-up but ‘cute’ would always be one of her traits.

“I...I…Yeah,” Seyoon stuttered. Kai didn’t understand why Seyoon had looked so anxious all of a sudden. Was there anything she should be nervous about? Because if there was someone whose heart was beating erratically, it was him.

“Let’s go inside,” said Kai. Seyoon nodded.

---

The two decided to order first before going to their table for a small talk, perhaps. Kai still didn’t know why Seyoon called to meet him but he wanted to make use of their remaining time together, just the two of them.

“What flavor do you want?”

“Taro is fine.”

“Okay.”

“Two taro flavored bubble—”

“Kai?”

Seyoon and Kai turned around to look at the owner of the voice. A girl, perhaps the same-aged as them, in sweat pants and loose fitting shirt was standing behind. If Seyoon was right, she looked like she just came from a dance practice or something.

“Ah…”

“I know I will see you here. Some of our classmates have seen you going here with that tall music major boy. What dance class are you getting this incoming fall semester?”

“That…I’m…” Kai’s eyes traveled on Seyoon who was just standing beside him with an unreadable expression on her face. “I’m not sure.”

“Well, that’s sad. It would be great if we become partners again in our dance class.” The girl innocently looked at Seyoon with a wondering look then back at Kai. “Am I intruding something?  I didn’t mean to.”

“No,” Kai swayed his head. “It’s fine. This is Seyoon.”

“Is she your girlfri—”

“It’s…” Seyoon and Kai looked at each other embarrassingly. “We’re…”

“Never mind. I think it’s too personal. Anyway, I hope to see you soon in our future dance classes and I’ll be glad to be your partner again. And,” the girl extended her hand to Seyoon with a smile which Seyoon took with expressionless eyes and questionable smile, “Nice to meet you.”

“You too.”

The girl left with Seyoon’s eyes never leaving her. If Kai was right, he thought he saw Seyoon with a disappointed look – but her facial expression was too emotionless to the point that he wasn’t feeling at ease anymore. Did he say something that disappointed her?  

“Who is she?” Seyoon asked without looking at him.

“Ah…she’s a classmate from the university. She’s also a dance major like me. Her name is Ga—”

“Kai, what are you doing here?” Luhan interrupted, acting as if he didn’t know but it was his idea for Kai to suggest that he and Seyoon would meet at the café owned by Sehun so he could observe them from afar.

“We’re having lunch, can’t you see?” said Kai with twitching lips.

“Oh, really?! Then why don’t you go to the usual spot on the rooftop and I’ll bring your orders.”

“You’ll bring our orders?”

“Oh, I forgot to mention that I am working here part-time. Besides, Sehun is a generous boss.”

“That’s great.”

“You seemed not in a good mood,” said Luhan when she noticed Seyoon’s odd expression. He looked at Kai, mouthing ‘What’s wrong?’ Kai only replied with a shrug. Luhan gave him a ‘I’m going to kill you if something happen,’ look before smiling back at Seyoon.

“I think we should go upstairs. Let’s just leave everything to Luhan. He knows the best food to serve.”

Seyoon nodded but never smiled. Luhan patted Kai’s back with a little force before giving him a deathly glare.

There must be really something wrong.

---

The lunch ended rather quietly with a few glances here and there but no one ever bothered to talk. Only the sounds of the cutleries and the occasional interruption by Luhan were what keeping the silence bearable at least. If Kai had done something, which he hadn’t figure out yet no matter how hard he tried, he should be the one to bring the good mood back to Seyoon.

“I miss you.”

The teaspoon never reached Seyoon’s ice cream as she lifted her head to look at Kai. There was a slight glint in her eyes but it was still vague.

“I – I mean, we weren’t able to talk that much in the past two years,” and I don’t know if you’re avoiding me or not or it was just that you have more time giving Lay a video call, Luhan a phone call, Kyungsoo a postcard, or a chat with Xiumin, “so I am really hoping that I’ll be able to catch up with the lost time. If only I can, I wish to extend another week for you to stay here but I don’t…”

“I’m sorry,” Kai heard a hint of sadness in Seyoon’s voice.

“Why are you apologizing? I know you tried to spend your vacation with us and—”

“I’m sorry if I am not able to talk to you or call you or even send you a letter for these past two years. I’m really sorry. I miss you too…” There was a moment of silence and Seyoon not once landed a gaze on Kai, “…so much but it’s my choice not to talk to you.”

Seyoon didn’t want to lift her head to look at Seyoon and maybe she missed the chance to see the shock embedded on Kai’s face.

“You chose not to?” So she’s really avoiding me? “Did I do something wrong?”

“No, no. Please don’t misunderstand. It’s…it’s my choice. You didn’t do anything wrong or say anything wrong. You don’t know how much I wanted to talk to you but there are things that are harder to express through words.” Seyoon’s voice faltered with every word as if she felt like she was sinking in her seat. She didn’t plan to do this earlier but Eli…

“There’s something I wanted to tell you, something related to Eli…”

~*~

 

 

 

“Kai?”

“Hello.”

“I’m happy that you’re all able to make it here.”

“Nope. Thanks for the free ticket and good hotel service. I think Baekhyun and I will have a tour to the Statue of Liberty after this,” said Chanyeol.

“Besides, we’re close to the bride and groom. It’s such a waste to let this important occasion go,” said Sehun who came after Kyungsoo and Baekhyun.

“Thank you,” replied Eli. “I’m sure there’s more to New York than the statue. Anyway, if you want to see Seyoon,” Eli’s gaze traveled to Jongin, who looked cute with the tux that he personally chose for the kid, “and Gayoon, they’re in the bride’s room, probably preparing by now.”

“Are we allowed to go there?” Kyungsoo asked.

“I don’t see anything wrong unless you’re the groom, right? Anyway, I, too, have to go to prepare myself. I’ll see you around.”

“I want to see Seyoon. Jongin, let’s go,” said Chanyeol as he picked Jongin up in his arms.

---

The smell of lavender wafted inside the bride’s room as expected of the bride’s choice. It wasn’t even a surprise to see purple drops of petals along the way. There was so much to the scent that brought back memories to Kai. But it was all from the past and now was a different chapter for a different reason, and a different feeling for a different person. How he wished it was him walking down that aisle but his side of the story was already over. He could only reminisce.

“Wow!”

Seyoon, Gayoon, and Kris, who happened to be there first, turned their heads around to Chanyeol deep voiced remark.

“Omo! Seyoon, you’re beautiful!” Luhan and Chanyeol immediately went beside Seyoon to stare at her reflection in the mirror.

“Eomma!”

Gayoon turned around and smiled.

 

 

 

 ~*~

Their lunch and talk had long been finished and Kai was only staring blankly on the velvet covered notebook on the table and an empty chair opposite of him. Only the sound of a fallen cutlery brought him back to his senses. A curious Luhan standing before him, awkwardly retrieving the used plates and glasses. There was nothing much to say but more to ask because Kai’s silence already hinted something – something happened between him and Seyoon and Luhan had been more eager to know.

“Coffee, do you want some? Or second round of bubble tea? My treat.”

“No…no need. Just a time alone will be fine.”

“Alright. But if you need anything just don’t hesitate to ask me. I’ll be downstairs.” Luhan slowly walked away, turning his head every second, but Kai never said a word.  Kai’s eyes were still stuck on the notebook. Maybe it was time to consult Kris if he knew anything about it.

---

“Eli Kim is one of the students in the university.”

Kai didn’t know the connection of Eli to Seyoon avoiding him for two years but he needed a clear explanation so he was silently listening to whatever Seyoon was telling him and it better be a good reasonable one because he didn’t know if his heart could handle it afterwards. He was trying to hide his nervousness as he tightly gripped his pants with his clammy hands.

“At first I didn’t know why he was always smiling at me whenever we see each other on the lobby or the corridor but he definitely looked familiar.”

Don’t tell me he’s another of Chanyeol’s kind. The uncanny stalker type with a borderline creepy smile. No, scratched that. He was definitely creepy.

“I didn’t know that he wanted to talk to me for so long until we met in an Asian music convention in Brooklyn.”

Or maybe he’s like Luhan. The innocent type but with doubtful intentions.

“It was then that it came to me why he looked so familiar.” A smile was slowly forming in Seyoon’s face.

Kai suddenly felt jealous. What did Eli have that could make her smile like that? His grip of the bubble tea cup became tighter.

“Eli is Jongdae-oppa’s youngest brother.”

“Wait, what?” He almost crushed the cup for no reason. Although, he still wasn’t feeling at ease.

“Eli is actually Jongdae-oppa and Heechul-oppa’s youngest brother who lived and grew up in America. It was then that I remembered meeting him before when Jongdae-oppa brought him to our house when I was still young. That explained why I feel comfortable with him.”

“You’re not avoiding me because of him, right?” Kai mumbled with no intention for Seyoon to hear it but she still did and with Kai’s tone of voice, it sounded as if he was angry at her or something. He quickly tried to turn back what he had said but Seyoon already looked dejected. “I didn’t mean what I said.”

“No, it’s not like that. The truth is Eli is a member of a lyricist club in the university. It just happened that during my first year there, I decided to submit the lyrics of the song I sang during the SUPA audition. Do you still remember it?”

Kai nodded. “Why would I forget it when it’s so beautiful as if it was really based on what you feel?” he replied shyly, sipping some tapioca that made him choke halfway. He thought he heard Seyoon giggled.

“Thanks. The truth is I made that song two years prior the audition.” And it was really made for someone, she whispered.

“Huh?”

“Nothing. So uhm, Eli saw it in the school’s publication and he tried to talk to me after that. I found out that his group is trying to promote songs with Korean lyrics and he wants to record my song.”

“That’s great. At least, your talent in composing songs is finally recognized plus the fact that they wanted to promote Korean songs, I think it’s even a great opportunity. So, did you let them—”

“I couldn’t.”

“Why?”

Seyoon fidgeted with her fingers before pushing a velvet-covered notebook on the table. Kai noticed that notebook earlier but he didn’t really pay much attention to it not until now.

“Don’t open it!” Seyoon suddenly shouted when Kai’s fingers brushed on the cover. Her voice was quite scary, scarier than Secretary Im who scolded him for tearing Seyoon’s application for the business school. “I mean not now,” she trailed off with a soft apologetic voice. “I couldn’t lend Eli the songs because… because none of them are mine.”

Kai’s eyebrows furrowed in curiosity. There was still a big deal of ambiguity with the connection of Eli, Seyoon not talking to him, and now, a notebook.

“Like I said earlier, there were things that are hard to express just by merely saying it. The notebook…it’s for you to keep it.” Seyoon took a deep breath before standing up. Kai instinctively stood up too.

Don’t tell me she’s leaving now.

There weren’t any words but a tight embrace, just an affectionate, friendly, but longing type. Something that maybe the two of them were longing to do for two years. “It’s nice spending my vacation here with our friends and you. It’s nice to talk you again after two years. It’s nice seeing that you’re doing fine.” Kai felt Seyoon’s head leaning against the crook of his neck. Kai wished they would stay like that for a little longer but there was a feeling that it won’t last and it really didn’t. “I’ll see when I see you,” mumbled Seyoon before leaving Kai left alone.

Why did it felt like it was the last?

---

“Is he still upstairs?” Chanyeol asked.

Apparently, Luhan already took it as a protocol to call Chanyeol because he wasn’t really feeling well. Kai was staying on the rooftop, alone, for almost an hour already and there were still no signs of movement or something. It was Chanyeol’s protocol to call Baekhyun; Baekhyun called Lay (because they were studying in the same university); Lay called Xiumin; Xiumin at that time was luckily having lunch with Kyungsoo; Kyungsoo never thought twice before running to the café; and Sehun, well, he was the owner of the café so he was there. And it became an emergency meeting. Agenda: to bring Kai back to earth with an intact heart.

“He’s been staring on a notebook for almost an hour. I think he is reading it,” said Luhan who was peeking at the rooftop every now and then.

“What notebook?” Sehun asked.

“I saw Seyoon holding that notebook earlier. Maybe she gave it to Kai.”

“What do you think is the content of that notebook?” asked Baekhyun.

Luhan shrugged and before he spoke again, someone’s voice interrupted them.

“It’s Kris. I thought he might be a big help. Look, it’s a video call!” Chanyeol said excitedly as he waved his tablet in front of them. On the screen, everyone could that Kris was obviously having a good time in the sauna because he wasn’t wearing anything fashionable but a shirt and a lamb towel hat. And Suho was kind of snoring beside him.

“What is it?” Kris asked with his forever stern look.

“Kai has gone insane,” Baekhyun replied.

“Care to spill a little more detail or else I’ll suggest that you bring him to an expert for assurance.”

“No, it’s not like that. Let Luhan explain,” said Kyunsoo.

“Seyoon and Kai had a lunch here earlier and aside from the girl who interrupted their order—”

“Wait, there’s another girl involved?” Xiumin asked just for the sake of asking.

“Yeah. There’s this girl who interrupted them saying she missed Kai and that she wished to be in the same class as him again. In other words, she’s flirting with him! And I think her name is Ga.”

“Ga? Is there such a name?” Lay asked, again, for the sake of asking something.

“Ah, maybe you’re talking about Ga In. I’m pretty sure it’s Ga In, one of Kai’s classmates but I’m sure she doesn’t have any intention to Kai.”

“What makes you sure about that?” Baekhyun asked.

“Because I feel like she likes me,” Chanyeol blushed.

Kyungsoo smacked Chanyeol’s head as Kris rolled his eyes. “Okay, this is getting out of the topic. Leave that innocent girl alone, stop daydreaming Chanyeol and Luhan, continue,” commanded the other on the video call.

“So, they have lunch and I just recommended the newest one in our menu. By the way, Seyoon said she liked the Lemon Chicken so much. She said it’s very well done.” Sehun nodded and Kyungsoo beamed because it was his original recipe.

“Okay, we’re getting out of topic again. Luhan, go straight to the point!”

“I wasn’t really there the whole time. All I know was I saw Seyoon going downstairs and bid Sehun and I goodbye. When I went up, Kai was already lost in his mind while holding a notebook.”

“A notebook? What kind of notebook?”

“Well, it is something like a brown velvet-covered notebook. It’s about an inch thick.”

“Oh my goodness!”

All of their heads turned to the tablet with disbelief. They didn’t just hear Kris squeal with a high-pitched voice, right? But he did once again and it seemed like Suho stirred awake and grunted beside him.

“What is it?” all of them asked.

“Don’t you know what does that mean?”

“What?!” all of them groaned in frustration.

“It means Seyoon just confessed his feelings to Kai!” Kris grinned so wide that his gums was almost showing and it seemed like Suho went back to sleep again or did he just faint?

Sehun, Kyungsoo, and Xiumin smiled at each other. For the record, it was the first time that Sehun smiled like an idiot. Chanyeol buried his head on the crook of Baekhyun’s neck whispering something about curing his shattered heart.

“I study how to cure animals, Chanyeol, not a broken-hearted giant like you but I can treat you ice cream if you want to.”

Luhan, on the other hand, cried on Lay’s shoulder like a child. “I don’t know if you believe in unicorn but I do. So, in the power of my love to you as a friend and my love for unicorns, I hereby heal your heart with a consoling hug.” And Luhan cried some more.

“Ah, isn’t this great? A confession before we leave tomorrow,” they heard Kris said at the other line.

“Excuse me, what?!” Chanyeol shouted.

“We’re leaving tomorrow. Didn’t Seyoon tell you?”

“Pardon my French, but that’s !” Kyungsoo shouted. All people, including the other customers, glared at him.

---

To Kai,

For two years, I’ve wanted to talk to you but I’ve been overwhelmed with fear to the point that seeing you even once would make me feel edgy. It’s not because you make me feel intimidated or you did something wrong. It’s just that I am afraid that just merely seeing you or hearing your voice and I would feel my whole brain shutting down. Yet, it’s funny that whenever I talk to Chanyeol or Luhan, or anyone from our friends, there was not a day that I didn’t ask about your whereabouts or the things that you were currently into.

This notebook contains all the songs I have written within two years of my stay in New York. There’s a reason why I couldn’t give it to anyone else or show it to anyone...not yet. Not until the reason why I wrote these songs see them himself. Not until the person whom I dedicated all the songs here will be able to read them, handwritten, fresh from the ink, jotted on paper.

I never owned the songs. I never see them as mine. It’s all yours, Kai, because you’re the reason why I write. Because all of the things written here are all the things I wanted to tell you for the longest time.

 

 

P.S.

If the songs aren’t still enough to explain what I feel then let me tell you.

I love you, Kai. I always do.

~*~

 

 

 

“Eomma!”

Gayoon turned around and smiled when she saw her little brother running towards them. She even felt more excited when she saw her appa standing by the doorway.

“Luhan is right, Seyoon. You really looked beautiful!” Chanyeol commented.

“What? I can hear you both from here Luhan and Chanyeol. Don’t you think I won’t feel hurt hearing you commenting about how beautiful Seyoon is when the bride-to-be, the supposedly main character of the event tonight, is just a few feet away from you?”

Luhan and Chanyeol smiled awkwardly and stepped back a little. “Sorry, Secretary Im. You look good by the way,” said Chanyeol.

“What? Just good?”

“Uhm, you look fine?” said Luhan.

“What? And you’re not even sure!”

“Yah, yah, yah. You look beautiful, Yoona…when you’re not angry like that,” Kris retorted. Both Luhan and Chanyeol hid behind their savior as Yoona went back to her seat and asked for a retouch and probably a pain reliever for a headache caused by the two.

“Fine. I’ll stay calm for the sake of staying beautiful but I don’t want to hear a from you two,” referring to Luhan and Chanyeol

Seyoon just smiled when she felt someone tugging her dress. “Omo, how’s my little boy?”

“Eomma, I miss you!” said Jongin as he showered her mom with kisses. Gayoon ran to her father as Kai lifted her up.

“How’s my princess?” he asked his six-year old.

“Eomma and I helped with the flowers. See, I made this,” she said while pointing on the garland on her head.

“It’s beautiful.” Kai smiled as his daughter gave her a peck on the cheek.

“Where are the others?” Seyoon asked as Kai sat beside her.

“They went to the groom’s room. I think Eli is still busy with the preparations. Jongdae-hyung might be nervous by now,” Kai chuckled.

“Chen? That guy will never be nervous. I don’t think he’s even excited at all. He, Kris, and Suho just went to have fun yesterday and they went back at already three in the morning. Now tell me, is a man who’s supposed to get married today at four in the afternoon will go home at three in the morning, sleep for hours, and wake up just two hours before the set schedule? I think he’s just doing this ceremony for the sake of it.”

“Stop whining, noona. If only you knew how Jongdae-hyung called us several times just to make sure that Jongin will be here as the ring bearer and Seyoon as your wedding singer. He’s really making sure that everything will be fine.”

“He’s right, Yoona. Chen is freaking nervous that Suho and I have to take him out for him to forget the stress even just for a day. He is still worried about the food for the reception.”

“Really? Why didn’t you tell me?”

“Ah, the feeling of entering a marriage,” Kai leaned on Seyoon’s shoulder. “I missed it just like the scent of lavender in this room. It reminds of that day when we had our wedding ceremony.” Seyoon smiled and hummed in reply.

“Ah, the feeling of having a family,” Luhan and Chanyeol cooed as they both leaned on Kris’ shoulders.

“Kris, please adopt us if we stay single for the rest of our lives,” Chanyeol murmured.

“You wish,” said Kris, shaking his shoulder to let the airheads fall off of his shoulder as he stood up and approached Seyoon. “Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’ll just bring little Jongin to Eli so he could practice for the wedding march later on. Come here, Kai two point zero.”

 

 

 

~*~

“Are you waiting for someone?” Eli asked when he saw Seyoon constantly fidgeting with her phone as if she was waiting for something to come.

“What? Oh, no.”

“We’re leaving in a few minutes. Aren’t your friends coming to send you off?”

“Ah…I – I don’t know. I told them not to come anyway.” But the truth was she never told anyone about their departure that day. She didn’t want to cry to the fact that she might not be able to see them again for another year or two. Besides, now that her lyrics were with Kai, she felt like she couldn’t face him for the meantime. Ah, she couldn’t stop feeling flush and embarrass just thinking about the fact that Kai might have already read all the songs she wrote for the past two years. If she was Kai, she might take the lyrics in one mouthful like cheese because, yeah, it was cheesy. Whatever. Seyoon swayed her head and tried to remove some unnecessary thoughts when Kris spoke.

“We’ll be taking the express train to Incheon Airport.”

“What?”

“Well, since it is the last day that Eli will be here, we think that it is better for him to experience riding a public transportation. We always go by car so this is something new. Am I right?” Suho asked.

“Yeah. I think it’s a good idea, Seyoon. Besides, lengthening my stay here even for just fifty three minutes is enough for me to feel the Korean air.”

Seyoon didn’t know why they decided it all of a sudden but she couldn’t do anything. At least, she had fifty three minutes to calm her thoughts.

Or maybe not. Because halfway through their way, Suho and Kris (and surprisingly, even Eli) forced her to buy some snacks and coffee for them so she did. Unfortunately, by the time she went back with a bag of snack in one hand and a coffee take away box on the other, the train where she was supposed to be in already departed leaving her with nothing but the food and her phone.

Now, what?

She decided to wait for the next train as she sat on one of the benches. It was then when her phone started vibrating in her pocket with Luhan’s number on the screen.

“Hello, Luhan?”

“XOXO”

“What?”

“XOXO”

“Chanyeol?”

“XOXO, yeah”

“An ‘X’ for a kiss, an ‘O’ is for a circled hug. Maybe you already know.”

“Kyungsoo? I thought it was—”                               

“Day by day, I secretly wrote you a letter and that’s what I wrote in the end. Although I’ve never given it to you.”

“Baek?”

“How are you these days? Anything special? Only those typical words pass through my head. Actually my heart is deep, deeper than the sea. The word that I really want to say is be with me.”

“Chanyeol, are you confessing to me again?”

The next lines became foreign to Seyoon all of a sudden, literally. She thought she heard Xiumin and Lay singing on the other line, tripled with Luhan. And then, she thought she heard Chanyeol shouting, “Hey, that’s Mandarin. There’s no way Seyoon would understand that!”

She thought she heard Luhan replied, “But it’s best to express our feelings with our native language.”

And then the small argument went on and on in the background with Kyungsoo and Baekhyun trying to increase the volume of their voice to cover the noise.

Seyoon thought she heard Chanyeol saying, “But it’s not your feelings that we’re trying to convey here. It’s Kai—”

“Ssh, shut up. This is supposed to be a surpri—”

And then Kyungsoo spoke, “We’re sorry for the inconvenience but we have to cut this special service short.” And the call ended just like that.

What’s that all about?

 “Is that their way of saying goodbye?”

And then her phone started ringing again. This time, there wasn’t any instrumental sounds and singing voices, just a quiet background sound; and then she heard a voice, a very familiar one. Of course it was familiar; she knew that nasal deep toned voice.

“Kai? Kai, is that you?”

She heard a cough. “No. This is…uhm…a survey call. Yeah.”

“What is this all about, Kai? I know it’s—”

“This wouldn’t take long, ma’am. All you have to do is to answer our questions choosing only between an ‘x’ or an ‘o’; ‘x’ for no and ‘o’ for yes. This is just a quick survey. No harm will be done...as long as you answer truthfully and honestly.”

“Okay, what’s the meaning of thi—”

“First question – and I want to suggest that you stop interrupting our talk every now and then so we can go on with it smoothly. I believe you are waiting for the next train to arrive.”

“I…fine.” How does he know that I am in a train station and that I am waiting for the next train? Before Seyoon could ever think of a logical answer, Kai’s voice resounded again.

“First question, based on song number one entitled ‘Closer’, is it true that you asked for a giant’s help for you to compose the song?”

“I…that’s…”

“Just ‘x’ or ‘o’, ma’am. And time is ticking.”

“O”

“Okay. Second question, still based on the same song, is it true that you decided to write the song as your way of telling the person whom the song was dedicated to that you have feelings for him?”

“O”

“And you are in first year high school when this happened?”

“O”

“So you realized that you like him during that time?”

“That’s…” There was a momentary pause and a deep sigh before Seyoon’s voice was heard again. “X.”

It seemed like the person on the other line was surprised as his voice started to stutter, “Ca-can you elaborate on that? When ha-have you realized that you like that person?”

“I…” This was embarrassing and to think that they were talking through phone. If Kai was in front of her, Seyoon would surely run away from him.

“You can’t board the next train if you don’t answer my questions.”

“I started to like him during that time when he entered a dance competition where he competed against his other friend named, Luhan.” Seyoon thought she heard a loud gasp in the background and it was definitely not Kai.

“It was when I saw him dance for the first time…” Seyoon blushed just by reminiscing that memory.

She heard another cough. “Okay, that was a long time ago. Not that I know but I can feel it. Okay, whatever. Next question, based on the third song entitled ‘Daffodils’, about that kiss the girl had on the field of golden flowers where she and her friend rehearsed for their stage play ‘Snow White’, tell me, was the guy she kissed back then her first kiss?”

“Wait, what? You rehearsed for that scene? But I was the casted prince back then…” someone grunted and Seyoon was sure it was Chanyeol.

“Shut up…okay, don’t mind those voices. They were just my conscience.”

Seyoon couldn’t help but giggle but it still took her time before answering with an “O” and she thought she just heard Chanyeol broke down and sob.

“That’s an interesting fact. Okay, last question, and it has something to do with the recurring theme of all the songs in the notebook and that last line you said in your note. Just an ‘x’ or an ‘o’. Is it true – and I want nothing but the whole truth coming from you directly – that you love Kai and will always do?”

Seyoon could hear the other line’s deep breathing as if he was nervous for what she was about to say. She smiled and took a deep breath before saying, “I do…I mean ‘O’”

“That…that’s good to hear. Well, I guess that’s the end of the survey. It’s…nice talking to you, ma’am—”

“Kai…”

“I have to end this call now.”

“Wait? I…I just want to say thank you for spending your time reading the lyrics. It still isn’t converted into a full song because I am working on the instruments but I hope I’ll be able to let you hear them someday when they already have the melody and the rhythm.”

“That – that would be something I’ll anticipate. It’s nice talking to you. Have a nice day. Bye…I mean, see you when I see you…”

Seyoon wasn’t able to reply for a goodbye when the beeping tone appeared, signaling that the call had ended. She thought she felt something would flow from her eyes but she was holding everything in. She wouldn’t cry anymore. She would like to leave with a smile on her face. This wasn’t goodbye, she wished.

It was exactly on that moment the call ended that the next train arrived.

She didn’t regret anything. She didn’t regret giving that notebook to Kai. She didn’t regret confessing to him. She didn’t regret answering his question. She didn’t regret hearing his voice one last time. She didn’t regret loving him.

She entered the train without looking back, letting the rests of the bodies be pushed inside. It was weird that Kris suggested for them to take the train when she knew how he hated crowded places. And it was even more unfortunate because the train she boarded was more crowded than the original one she boarded earlier. She felt like her body would crush as people crowded the train more and more. It was a good decision that she left the food on the bench or else, the coffee would surely spill on her. But she was still unfortunate because she wasn’t born tall in the first place and she thought she couldn’t find a place to hold onto when the train move. If that’s the case, she would surely fall. She almost did until someone hold her in place and pulled her closer to a stranger’s body.

“There’s still one question I forgot to ask though,” she heard that familiar voice once again. “And this is a special on-the-field survey so you have to answer truthfully.”

“Kai…”

“If I say I love you too, would you promise not to look at anyone else no matter how tall, hot, and handsome that person is?” (He was actually referring to Kris).

Seyoon just stared at him, frozen. Just the words ‘I love you, too’ and she couldn’t function properly anymore.

“You have to answer me or I’ll let you go and you will lose your balance—”

“O”

Kai smiled. “Would you promise that even if you’ll share your song to others but I will be the first person to hear each song that you have composed and not Lay, or Chanyeol, or even Eli?”

“O”

“Would you promise to call me even if not every day but at least more than the call you have with Luhan or Lay or Kyungsoo?”

Seyoon laughed. “O”

“Even if New York is miles away, will you let me announce to the whole world that you’re my girlfriend, and mine only?”

“Kai…”

“Seyoon…” Kai pouted.

“O?”

“A question?”

“O,” Seyoon tried to say with a little assurance.

“Fine. One final question.”

“They’re more like commands than questions.”

“Ssh, just hear me out, okay?”

“Okay.”

“Would you say what you feel about me once again, in personal, now that I’m in front you, and there are a lot of people here who could hear you?”

“Your such a—” Seyoon was stopped with soft pair of lips landing on hers. It was unexplainable. It was long and affectionate and everything that would make butterflies in her stomach flew in reverie and maybe she would puke rainbows later on. But that’s not the point because her heart might be beating but her mind went blank except for that kiss. That feeling of being kissed by person she loved so much. The feeling like the earth was a giant cotton candy, all too sweet, and fluffy, and pink. It was crazy and euphoric.

“I love you,” Kai said softly, with their faces still inches apart, foreheads touching.

“I love you, too,” Seyoon replied with a confident genuine smile that made Kai wanted to own those lips again except that Kai noticed that other people especially the elderly were already looking at them and the public display of affection wasn’t really his thing. And the fact that the person he loved for so long and the only one he imagined to spend the rest of his life with telling him that she loved him too didn’t completely sink it. It still felt like a dream. He tried to bite the inside of his cheeks just to make sure.

“Ouch!”

“Why?”

And it hurts, so it must be true.

“Ah, Seyoon?”

“Hm?”

“One more thing.”

“What?”

“Don’t let Kris go inside your room again, or kiss you in front of me or even if not in front of me – don’t let him kiss you again, and—”

“Kai…”

“And I don’t like how close he could sometimes be with you—”

“Kai…”

“And how you hug each other like it would be the end of the world—”

“Kai!”

“What?”

“You don’t have to worry about Kris. Didn’t he tell you something about him? Or Chanyeol? Or Luhan?”

“What do you mean?”

“I guess the answer is no.” Seyoon smiled and hugged Kai tightly before whispering, “Kris is gay.”

“Yeah,” Kai’s eyes widened. “What?!”

“You heard me.”

“But that’s impossible…he’s…”

“He is Kai and you have to accept that fact.”

“And I felt like an idiot being all jelly seeing the two of you close to each other. But more than that, I can’t believe that Luhan or Chanyeol didn’t say anything to me. For two years, I’ve been mad, saying all my frustrations to them, and they were lying to me? They have to pay for this!”

Seyoon laughed as Kai looked at her.

“Just forget about it. I don’t want to see my boyfriend murdering my best friends for just a small thing.”

“Just a small thing? Wait…did you just call me ‘boyfriend’? Omo!”

“Okay, stop squealing with a high pitched voice. And yes, I claimed you as my boyfriend so it’s either you accept it or I’ll leave Korea and tell the whole world that I’m still single and ready to mingle. Do you want that? X or O?”

“Definitely ‘x’!”

Kai’s saw that smile formed in Seyoon’s lips and she tiptoed to plant a peck on his lips and whispered, “I love you…”

“I love you more…from Earth to Neptune and back.”

~*~

 

 

 

“Eomma?”

“Hmm?”

The wedding just ended and Kai and Seyoon decided to stay in Seyoon’s family house in New York while the rest of their friends stayed in the hotel. She was already preparing Jongin to sleep on his bed when Kai entered.

“How’s Gayoon?”

“She’s already asleep.”

“Hm…she enjoyed helping with the flower arrangements so she must be tired.”

“Must be.” Kai sat on the other side of Jongin’s bed while Seyoon sat on the other, Jongin’s hair. “How’s our little boy?”

“The food is delicious but I miss eomma’s home cooked food.”

“Oh, really?” Seyoon cooed. “Why? Is appa’s home cooked meal horrible?”

Kai glared at Jongin. Jongin encircled his arms on Seyoon and pulled her closer. “It was,” he whispered and Kai just pretended that he didn’t hear it although it hurt his pride a bit.

“Well, I guess we have to let appa attend a one on one cooking class with Uncle Kyungsoo.”

“What?”

“You have to Kai. I can’t be there always to cook for them. Besides, food deliveries aren’t always preferable.”

Kai grunted. “Fine.”

Jongin smiled and he and Seyoon just had a high five. “Eomma, appa’s friends gave me more friends. There’s Mr. Unicorn then Mr. Baozi—” Kai and Seyoon smiled at each looking at their enthusiastic son. “—But I still prefer Mr. Dragon and Mr. Ace Jr.”

“That’s great but it’s already late and appa and I also have to take rests.”

“One more thing, eomma?”

“What is it?”

Jongin lowered his head and fidgeted with his finger. Kai looked at Seyoon and mouthed ‘I guessed he misses you a lot.’

“Sorry, eomma,” the boy mumbled.

“Hm, why? Did you do something wrong? Did you eat the cookies I hid inside the cupboard?”

“No but yeah, a little bit. But that’s not it.”

“Did you play with your tablet for more than an hour?”

“No but yeah, when appa’s not looking. But eomma, that’s not it. I just want to say sorry because…because…”

“What honey? Tell me. I won’t get mad.” Jongin slowly lifted her head and Seyoon wanted to hug him because his eyes were glistening and he really looked seriously apologetic.

“Because I’ve mistaken you as a boy.”

Seyoon raised her eyebrow and Kai snickered in the corner. Seyoon glared at Kai because whatever nonsense Jongin was saying was probably another of Kai’s wrong teachings to her son.

“Why? What do you mean?”

“There’s this picture I saw in Uncle Sehun’s house and all of appa’s friends were there.”

Ah, probably their commemorative high school photo, Seyoon concluded. “Yes, I know that.”

“Well, appa was kissing someone and I thought it was a boy—”

Kai couldn’t contain his snicker so it turned into a stifled giggle. Seyoon smacked him not too violently but with threatening glare.

“But when I stared at it, the person looked familiar and he really looked similar to you so I thought it was Uncle Suho—”

Kai already broke down in huge fit of laughter until he fell off of the bed. Seyoon stuck her tongue out at him. Served him right.

“But appa said it was you and that you had a short hair before. I’m sorry eomma. I really thought appa kissed a boy,” Jongin sat up and hugged Seyoon tightly.

Seyoon give him a consoling rubbed in the back. “It’s okay. You don’t have to apologize. It’s alright to make mistakes sometimes.”

Kai was wiping the tears of joy from his eyes as he tried to stand up once again.

“Eomma, appa and I did a lot of things during the past days but I hope we could all four do that together.”

Seyoon’s facial expression softened. Kai sat beside his wife and son once again.

“We promise we will have fun together in the future, Jongin-ah,” said Seyoon.

“With Uncle Chanyeol, and Uncle Luhan, and Uncle Yixing, and Uncle Xiumin, and Uncle Baekhyun, and Uncle Kyungsoo, and Uncle Sehun, and Uncle Suho, and Dragon-ahjussi?”

“Yes, all of them.”

“And I could bring Mr. Bacon and—”

“Yes, even your friends.”

“And my two grandmas and two grandpas”

“Yes.”

“Thank you eomma, appa…”

“All for you honey…”

Seyoon cradled Jongin in her arms until she felt his breathing went steady, his body leaning relaxingly to her. Kai signaled that the boy had already fallen asleep so she gently placed his head on the pillow, Kai hovered the blanket on his small frame.

“Well that was tiring,” he said.

“Yes, but it is gratifying and fun.”

“Definitely. Seyoon?”

“Hm?”

“Thank you for being a wonderful mother to Gayoon and Jongin.”

“Why are you thanking me all of sudden?”

“Nothing. I just feel like I am the luckiest person in the world for having a great family.”

“Well, if you’re feeling lucky, so I am. I am happy that we’re into this parenthood together.”

“Yeah.”

The two looked at each other and smiled before having a chaste kiss. They thought they heard Jongin giggled but he was sleeping soundly so it they already stood up and was about to leave.

“We should take our rest too. I felt tired from the wedding preparations.”

“Yeah.” Kai pulled Seyoon closer to him for a hug. “I love you.”

“Sure.”

“What? Aren’t you going to reply ‘I love you too?’” Kai trailed after Seyoon and whined like a child.

“Stop acting like a child and stop whining. The kids might wake up.”

“But you have to say—”

“Fine. I love you, too.”

“Really?”

When Seyoon and Kai’s voices completely faltered and he was sure that they were really gone, Jongin opened his eyes and sneakily went to his bag, pulling out the tablet and stared at the picture that the four of them took together during the wedding.

How he loved seeing his appa, eomma, sister, and him together. He brought out Mr. Ace Jr. and brought it him to his bed before he fell asleep again.

He would surely have a nice dream after this.

---

 

 

 

 

 

The End (for real).

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

“What are you doing?”

“Sending my aegyo video to Jongin?”

“Huh? Why?”

“Because I couldn’t accept the fact that he chose Kris over me as the cutest among the three of us!”

“What? You’re a kid, Luhan.”

“Hey, don’t tell me that. It was your fault in the first place.”

“Me? Why?”

“Because you have to ask him that question and you knew that it was obvious that it should be me and not Kris.”

“Luhan, you’re an adult. Get on with it.”

“But admit that you, too, wished to be chosen.”

“That’s…”

“Never mind. I’ll just send this and wake up the next morning with Jongin telling his parents how cute his Uncle Luhan is and—”

“Let me take a look what kind of aegyo you’re proud about?” Chanyeol snatched the tablet away from Luhan and stared frozen on the screen. “Oh my goodness, holy guacamole!”

“Why? Are you intimidated by my overloaded cuteness?”

“Oh my god, abort! Abort!”

“What?”

“Abort sending the file!”

“Why? I sent it a while ago.”

“Oh no! Don’t talk to me. I still want to see Jongin after this.”

“What—”

“Stay away!”

---

 “Eomma!” Little Jongin jumped out of his bed and ran out of his room, leaving an opened tablet behind.

“Appa, let me sleep with you! I won’t play with my tablet anymore…” the boy pleaded.

Chanyeol could only pray – and Luhan still didn’t understand why – that neither Kai nor Seyoon would find evidence about that one sinful act or else Luhan would be the loneliest disowned uncle slash friend slash single person alive in this world.

---

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Do you even care to read a dramatic author's note?

 

Last Author's Note;

This chapter is my way of saying thank you to all the readers who encouraged, believed, subscribed, upvoted, and showed their love and support for me for the past 9 months of writing this fic. Can you believe it? It's nine months! But at last, it's done.

Did you take this in one mouthful like cheese because it's cheesy? This is like 11,000 w and 30 pages in Word. Sorry for the long epilogue.

And do you really think that I am a super evil writer who would wrote a 70+ chapters story and would not let the main characters end together? Of course, not! Some of you guessed it right anyway. Yeah, Gayoon is Jongin's sister. And it's Yoona and Chen's wedding.

Just one request for my readers: even if you haven't commented but you're reading this fic, and to those loyal commentators, just say something about this fic and the ending. Give me an answer, is this fic an 'x' or an 'o'? Upvote if you like the story.

That's it. Thank you so much! 

I'll reply to all your comments whether it's just an 'AHHHH' or a freaking long one or an emoticon. Con crit are accepted. Be honest please.

Love y'all.

XOXO

 

Your evil author,

Yuu

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

---

See you when I see you.