Chapter 24 – Is It Okay?

 

Yonghwa continually asked himself why he allowed women to completely step all over him lately. Seohyun acted like she was his dog and she was the master when they were at home, and now Min Jung was doing the same. It wasn’t necessarily a bad thing that he was being a little nicer, but he felt that he was being too passive with them. Then again he realized that they were arguably the two most stubborn and annoying people to exist on the face of the earth so he wouldn’t get away without a struggle. In the end he just followed Min Jung’s lead as she walked towards the swing that had been his refuge for a few years of his life. Eventually, they reached the old creaky swing that for some reason hadn’t been replaced yet.

“Gangster, make this quick I don’t have all day,” Yonghwa grunted. It’s not that he had to go to work right now or anything, but he didn’t feel like dealing with Min Jung today. His thoughts were already screwed up ever since the incident with Seohyun so he needed time to be alone and sort them out. It didn’t help that the weather was cold enough to freeze the blood flowing through one’s veins.

“Just sit down on the swing and listen up. You know I can kick your just as well as any man in this world, so you better not try to run away,” Min Jung threatened in a cute voice. Now that Yonghwa thought about it, it seemed Min Jung always spoke like that. He had never really noticed how much aegyo she put into her voice until now. It made the threat she just gave him pretty much useless, but he wasn’t planning on running away anyways.

“So what do you want to talk about?” Yonghwa asked once he gave up hope of leaving.

“First of all I want to say hi properly since today you totally blew me and Seohyun off when we saw you. Also, I have a question for you.” Min Jung looked down to the floor shyly and kicked a bit of dirt around with her black, leather shoes. Yonghwa could tell she was hesitating to ask the question and he could only assume she was asking him out. This would definitely get troublesome so he braced himself for what was coming.

“So can I hear the question now?” Yonghwa asked, still confident he knew what she would say.

“Ever since we were back in Japan, I’ve been wondering day and night about this. Well, not really day and night, but you know what I mean. It’s a question that I wanted to ask since then, but I didn’t really know if I had the right to ask you know?” Yonghwa was about to yell at her so she could just ask the question already. He hated people that beated around the bush and he just wanted to get it over with.

“I still haven’t heard a question yet,” Yonghwa pointed out sarcastically.

“I’m sorry if I’m interfering in matters that don’t pertain to me, but I’ll ask anyways. Yonghwa, what does Seohyun mean to you?” Min Jung asked, completely throwing Yonghwa off. He was expecting something that was nowhere close to what Min Jung just asked. Her question fell into territory Yonghwa was desperately trying to get out of at that moment. Here he was trying to forget all the things that had happened with Seohyun in the past months, and Min Jung comes along and ruins it for him.

“What do you mean? A better question would be, why are you asking this?”

“Don’t think too much into the question. Just tell me sincerely what kind of person Seohyun is in your life,” Min Jung stated calmly. Yonghwa could tell there was nervousness in her voice, but she was hiding it well. He didn’t understand why she needed to ask the question, but he was trapped anyways so he had to answer it.

“Ha, you know, I’ve asked myself this question so many times,” Yonghwa began, planning to let all his feelings escape him. “Every time I asked myself this, I came out just as confused as you are. I don’t know what you think about me and Seohyun and for the longest time, neither did I. Perhaps it’s about time I answer that question, not just for you but for myself too.”

“I’m listening,” Min Jung responded firmly.

“To me Seohyun is someone so important to me,” Yonghwa admitted, letting all his insecurities go. “Before I met her I didn’t have any bonds with anyone but my mom. Everyone in this world abandoned me, and I did the same to the world.” Min Jung understood all the words that Yonghwa was saying and the feelings that came with them. Like him, she had nobody in her life except her father, but she wanted to change that. “Unlike you, who tried to have friends, I didn’t and that was one of my biggest flaws. However, Seohyun changed that even though I didn’t want to.”

“So how do you feel about her now?”

“Seohyun is my best friend,” Yonghwa confessed without hesitation. “I’ve never had a friend before so I don’t know what makes someone a best friend to be honest. However, if I stop and think about it, I don’t think anyone can come close to how important she is to me.” Min Jung was surprised at the words that exited Yonghwa’s mouth. It seemed a little strange for him to be speaking so gently and lovingly about someone he acted like he hated. It also made her lose a little bit of her resolve since she feared the worst was still to come.

“Is that all that Seohyun means to you? Is she only just a friend or is she more than that?” Min Jung questioned further. She didn’t want to seem pushy, but she needed answers from him that she would get nowhere else.

In the back of his mind, Yonghwa knew the answer to that question. The reasoning part of his brain knew the answer to that too; however, it was the fake reason. Yonghwa knew which one was the right answer, but like always, gave into the wrong one. “She’s nothing more than my best friend,” he lied. “Seohyun might be all the great things in the world, but I don’t see her as anything more than that. I would still give my life away to save her, but I don’t think she means anything more than that.” Yonghwa wanted to hit himself for lying, but he couldn’t help it. After he told himself that he was supposed to ditch those feelings for Seohyun anyways, he felt like he did the right thing after all.

“Are you sure about that Yonghwa? For some reason, your answer doesn’t convince me at all,” Min Jung told him in a suspicious voice. “You know, I can read people like a book and I think you’re lying to me.”

“Believe what you want, I told you the truth you wanted to hear. I don’t know why you would ask me something like this, but I’m not going to ask why. Is there anything else you want to know?” Yonghwa asked in an annoyed voice.

“I’ll ask you again, what does Seohyun mean to you?”

“I’ll answer the same way each time. Seohyun is a friend, my best friend, but nothing more. I don’t know how much clearer I can make myself,” he replied in the most serious way he could express himself. Min Jung took his confession after he repeated himself since he seemed to be very serious. Yonghwa was not only lying to Min Jung, but also to himself. Even though he was lying to himself, he had to do that in order to get rid of the crazy thoughts swimming through his head.

“I’m sorry for asking you these things and taking away your time, but I needed the answer to that question. Thanks for answering it,” Min Jung thanked him happily. “Is it okay if I swing by your house and talk to Seohyun? I didn’t really get to see her much and I really have to talk to her about something.”

“You’re going to go even if I say no anyways, so just go. Oh, here’s Seohyun’s cell phone number so you can call her before you get there.” Yonghwa took out the phone that had caused him and Seohyun so much trouble a few months back and found Seohyun’s number.

“Woah, you have a phone? I thought you said you would never get one,” Min Jung pointed out. “I won’t ask you for your number since I know Seohyun will just give it to me if I ask her.” Yonghwa refrained from growling at the giggling girl since it seemed like he would never win an argument against her.

“Alright, get lost now. I have to get to work now since I’m not a rich little girl like you or Seohyun. Please try to not live in my house like that little princess does. I’d rather not have two people mooching off of me and keeping me from doing anything productive.”

“I didn’t have any intention to until you gave me the idea,” Min Jung teased with a devilish smirk. “Have fun at work, I’ll see you later.” Yonghwa continued to sit on the swing as he saw Min Jung speed off in the direction of his house. He couldn’t really pinpoint why she had just asked him so many questions about Seohyun, but he dispelled the thoughts quickly. Anything that had to do with Seohyun had to disappear since he couldn’t keep feeling weird things for her.

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“Annyeong Min Jung, how did you know my number?” Seohyun asked as she let the happy girl into her new home. “Do you want anything to eat or drink?”

“No thanks I’m good Seohyun. I saw Yonghwa just now and he gave me your number. I knew he didn’t want to give me his so I’ll just get it from you later.” Seohyun led her new neighbor to the living room and they each plopped down onto the couch ungracefully. Seohyun wondered what Min Jung wanted, but at least they could spend time together.

“So what did you want to talk about Min Jung? I found it kinda weird that you said you had something really important to ask me and that it couldn’t wait,” Seohyun admitted. She had an idea what it was about, but she had to make sure.

“It’s a little embarrassing for me to ask, but I figured I should do it anyways since it feels wrong to not do it.” Seohyun was a little confused by her last statement but she kept closed and paid attention carefully. “I just talked to Yonghwa,” Min Jung began. “He thought it was really random that I asked him the questions I did, and you probably will too. Still, I think it’s right that I do ask them. Seohyun, what does Yonghwa mean to you?”

Just as Yonghwa had been caught off guard, so was Seohyun. “Uh, that’s a hard question to answer…” Seohyun trailed off as she thought of an answer. She knew she loved him, she had even admitted it to her friends. It was obvious that Seohyun loved Yonghwa, but she never really made a move to act on her feelings. In the end, she would end up lying about her feelings as she felt she would never get anywhere with them. “He’s a friend,” Seohyun finally lied.

“Is he more than your friend? Or is he just a friend?” Min Jung prodded. She felt a little bad for interfering in people’s lives, but she had to get answers before she could act.

“Ani, he’s nothing more than my friend. I really appreciate him and I would do anything to make him happy, but I don’t like him more than as a friend,” Seohyun continued to lie. It tore her heart to shreds as she lied, but she figured Yonghwa would never love her back. If he never loved her back, her love for him felt meaningless. “Why do you ask?”

“This is where it gets awkward,” Min Jung laughed while scratching the back of her neck. “I came here to get permission.”

“Permission for what?” Seohyun asked confusedly. She had no idea what Min Jung would need to ask permission for. The whole situation seemed strange but she refrained from asking any more than she already had.

“Is it okay…” Min Jung began, leaving Seohyun to stare expectantly. “Is it okay if I like Yonghwa?” Min Jung’s question landed on Seohyun like a ton of bricks. Deep down, Seohyun knew that this day would come, but she didn’t think it was so soon. The day she feared had finally come and she had no idea what to say. Seohyun wanted to lash out at Min Jung and tell her that Yonghwa was hers, but she couldn’t do that. Min Jung had nothing but pure intentions and she couldn’t hurt her in that way.

“Um, why are you asking me that?”

“I know it sounds kind of strange since it’s not like you’re his mom or anything. I felt that I needed permission from you since you’re the closest person to him,” Min Jung explained. “I needed to make sure that you didn’t like Yonghwa too. It seemed like you guys were pretty close back in Japan, and you living together further strengthened that belief. I didn’t want to trespass on ground that I wasn’t supposed to.”

“Min Jung…” Seohyun mumbled, almost on the verge of crying. Seohyun felt like crying at how angry she was with herself. Min Jung was asking her for permission to date her friend because she felt she needed to, but here she was being jealous. Seohyun wanted to slap herself for feeling negative feelings for the sweet and innocent girl they met in Japan.

“If you liked Yonghwa, I wasn’t going to do anything about my feelings. If you and Yonghwa were going out or liked each other, I would have stepped aside the moment I heard about it. I don’t want to intrude in your relationship, so that’s why I needed you to answer these questions,” Ming Jung continued to explain. “So, is it okay?”

Seohyun thought she would feel like the biggest piece of trash on the planet if she denied Min Jung a chance at love. Even though her heart was screaming at her to tell Min Jung off, Seohyun couldn’t do that. Seohyun loved Yonghwa, but she didn’t own him. If Min Jung wanted to date Yonghwa or at least try to, it was up to Yonghwa to decide, not her. “I don’t know what to say to you Min Jung,” Seohyun admitted. “I knew you already liked Yonghwa, but I was not expecting this.”

“I know it’s kind of sudden, but I hope you understand. I know you have a boyfriend and you probably felt the same way when you met him right?” Min Jung supposed. Seohyun almost laughed at how far from the truth Min Jung was, but she kept herself from doing that. “I already asked Yonghwa about his feelings for you just in case he liked you too. Like I said, I don’t want to interfere with you guys if either of you had feelings for each other.”

“And what did he say?” Seohyun asked, bracing herself for the worst.

“He said the same thing you did. Actually he didn’t just call you a friend, he said you were his best friend,” Min Jung told her new friend. Seohyun wanted to cry at being called his best friend. She didn’t believe one bit that Yonghwa would admit that to anyone, much less Min Jung.

“He said that?!” Seohyun asked, cutting Min Jung off in the process.

“Yeah, I was actually worried when he said that. He said that with such a loving and gentle tone that I thought he actually had feelings for you. I asked him a billion times just to be sure and each time he told me that you were just his friend,” Min Jung stated. For a second in Seohyun’s mind she believed Min Jung was lying and being manipulative. However, she dispelled the thought once she realized that Min Jung was here asking permission. Seohyun supposed if Min Jung was being manipulative, she wouldn’t actually need to ask for permission. Once again Seohyun realized Min Jung had only pure intentions.

“Yeah, hehe, we’re just friends,” Seohyun responded in a fake voice. “There’s nothing else going on between us. It’s funny to think about us liking each other, but we sure don’t.” Seohyun couldn’t believe the outrageous lies she was spewing but she had to for Yonghwa’s and Min Jung’s sake. Seohyun didn’t have the right to stop them from liking each other. If she only knew that Yonghwa was beginning to have feelings for her, but sadly she didn’t have a clue.

“So does that mean it’s okay for me to like him? Is it okay for me to like Jung Yonghwa, your best friend? I know I keep asking this, but it’s important to me. Since you guys are so close, I would rather be completely sure that I’m not going to cause you any problems.”

“Don’t worry Min Jung, everything is fine,” Seohyun lied once more. “I don’t like Yonghwa and I know for a fact that he doesn’t like me. You didn’t need to ask me permission for that anyways, but since you asked, I’ll give it to you.”

“Jinjja?! Really Seohyun?!” Min Jung asked excitedly. “Thank you so much!! I’m glad you approve of me liking him!” Min Jung flew over the couch and gave Seohyun a huge but surprising hug. “I’ll make sure that if I do end up with him, I won’t let you down.”

“That’s… good Min Jung,” Seohyun falsely reassured. “I’m sure you’ll do fine.” The jealously in Seohyun’s heart was still present and it kept telling her there was no way Yonghwa would accept Min Jung anyways. She hated herself for thinking those thoughts, but she couldn’t help it. Seohyun wished she could turn back the clock and tell Min Jung that she did indeed like Yonghwa, but it was too late now. The damage was done and now Min Jung had become her rival.

“I can’t say I love Yonghwa yet, since I don’t really know him, but I would like to get to know him better in the future. Seohyun, why do you like Yonghwa so much?” Min Jung asked, catching Seohyun off guard once again. “Why does someone as nice as you like someone as big of a jerk as him?”

“Yonghwa might be a huge jerk sometimes, but I know it’s all just an act. He’s really caring and he will be there whenever I need him. I annoy him a lot, but I know in the end we both appreciate being there for each other,” Seohyun explained with a loving expression. “At first I wanted to be his friend because he was the only person that showed hate towards me and I needed to know why. It was a selfish reason, I know, but that eventually changed. Now I just want to be there for him, just as he was there for me when I needed him.”

“If I didn’t know better I would say you two are in love with each other,” Min Jung joked. Seohyun visibily stiffened at her comment, but tried to pass it off as just a joke. Since she had just lied to Min Jung, she couldn’t be found out or else it would bring trouble. “When I first saw him, I didn’t really like him. He was mean and annoying and he was just a big blockhead. When I spent more and more time with him, I realized he was just like me and I wanted to talk to him more. I’m really clingy huh?”

“No not at all. Even if I did think you were, it would be because of a valid reason.”

“Everyone back home treated me like I had the plague. I was known as the gangster kid who would kill your parents if I got mad at you. Once I met Yonghwa, I realized there was someone else like me that needed a friend. The desolation in his eyes and the sadness in his voice felt so familiar to me and I hated it. I hated that such a wonderful person like him had to experience those feelings. I’ve felt them before and I know how painful they are,” Min Jung explained with a pained expression. “Before I knew it, I was already into him and I wanted to get closer to him.”

“Min Jung are you okay? You look like you’re about to cry,” Seohyun pointed out. Just like Yonghwa had cried when he opened his heart to her, it seemed like Min Jung would be doing the same.

“Yeah, I’m fine, sorry. I know Yonghwa is cool and handsome, but none of that matters to me. I just want to have someone by my side that knows how I feel and wants to get out of that. Yonghwa and I are complete opposites personality-wise but we both have walked the same dark path. I want to be the light at the end of the darkness for him, but I don’t know if he will let me.” Seohyun knew exactly what Min Jung felt. Now Seohyun was sure she was in love with Yonghwa, but sadly she couldn’t act on it. Seohyun supposed Min Jung would be the best person to drive Yonghwa out of the darkness. What good would it do Yonghwa to have her by her side? If anyone knew how to make Yonghwa happy, Seohyun supposed it would be Min Jung.

“Min Jung, I know how you feel. Well, not exactly, but I know a little bit about it. I also want to help Yonghwa get out of that darkness, but I don’t know how to. I’ve thought about it day and night, but I never get the answer. I’m sure you will do a better job than I do.  You know how he feels and the pain he has felt. I’ve never experienced things like that so I wouldn’t know what to do. I think you’re the best person for the job and nobody else.”

“Do you really think so Seohyun?” Min Jung asked, wiping the tears pooling in her eyes. “Do you really think that I can get through to him and make him happy?”

“Yeah, I think you can,” Seohyun responded sadly. It pained her to give away Yonghwa to someone else, but she wasn’t lying. To her, Min Jung was a better candidate to get Yonghwa through his problems. Seohyun supposed Yonghwa would never love her back, so Min Jung would have to make him happy. As always, her stubbornness and hesitating was pushing her away from confessing her feelings to Yonghwa.

“Seohyun, I know how much Yonghwa means to you, and I promise I won’t hurt him. He’s been hurt too much already and I can’t bear to see him suffer more. If you think it’s okay for me to go after him, then I know I can do it,” Ming Jung chirped happily. Seohyun pulled Min Jung into a hug once more, confirming that it was okay for her to like Yonghwa.

“I know you’ll do a good job Min Jung. I can assure you that,” Seohyun guaranteed the emotional girl. The two girls broke away from each other and gave each other a smile. Min Jung’s was genuine, but she failed to see the pained and fake smile Seohyun was giving her. “I’m sure you’ll do a better job than I ever could. Min Jung, you have to love Yonghwa as much as I love him. You have to make him as happy as I once thought I could make him. He will never love me back, but I know he will be able to love you. I’ll watch quietly on the sidelines as you make my wish come true.” If only Seohyun could bring herself to say that last thought, she would avoid many future problems to come.

“Can I ask you one last favor Seohyun? I know it’s a lot to handle but I really need your help.”

“Yeah, sure I’ll do anything you need me to,” Seohyun agreed.

“Can you help me with Yonghwa? I don’t really know him that well and I know he won’t appreciate me just jumping into his life. Since you’re his best friend, I think if you help me out, I’ll be able to get him with me. What do you say?” It was bad enough Seohyun was tearing her heart to pieces by denying she liked Yonghwa, but now she also had to help Min Jung with that? Once again she wanted to deny Min Jung’s request but she couldn’t do that.

“I’ll help you with whatever you want Min Jung,” Seohyun responded. “I’ll make sure that Yonghwa ends up happy by your side.” All hopes Seohyun had of ever having Yonghwa by her side shattered at that moment. She just sealed her fate by agreeing to help Min Jung win over Yonghwa, but there was no going back now. Seohyun told herself that it was better to have Min Jung by Yonghwa’s side rather than having herself at Yonghwa’s side.

“You really are a good friend Seohyun,” Min Jung praised. “I’m glad you’re not only helping me be happy but I know you’re also watching Yonghwa and helping him out too. I don’t know where I would be without you. Oh man, it’s getting late and I still have to call my dad to tell him how everything went. I would love to keep blabbing about how I want Yonghwa by my side, but I gotta get going. It was nice having this girl-to-girl talk. Next time you gotta tell me all about what Yonghwa likes so I can make him happy. Oh, and since you have four years of experience dating, I’ll be sure to ask you for some tips. Bye!”

“Bye, Min Jung, get home safetly,” Seohyun responded. The two friends stood up from the couch and headed towards the front door. Each one waved each other goodbye once more before Min Jung headed out to her new home. As soon as Seohyun’s new friend left the apartment, she leaned against the door and let herself fall to the floor.

“Seohyun… what the hell did you just do?” the confused girl asked herself. “Will you be content with seeing Yonghwa happy with someone else? If he’s smiling with someone else by his side, will I also smile for him?”

_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Midnight rolled around and Seohyun still couldn’t get to sleep. After three hours of lying in her bed quietly, sleep didn’t seem like it would be coming. The thoughts of the conversation she had with Min Jung kept creeping into her head every time she was close to reaching any sort of sleep. Yonghwa wouldn’t be happy if she was outside waiting for him, so she stayed in the room just to be safe. After while she heard the front door slam shut, indicating Yonghwa was home. Impatience got the best of her and she made her way to greet the man she loved.

“How was work?” Seohyun asked once she stepped into the living room.

“Boring as always. Haven’t I told you to not wait for me? If you over sleep then that’s your problem. I’m not an alarm clock, so just go to bed now,” he complained.

“Yonghwa, seriously, what’s wrong with you? I haven’t done anything to make you angry yet you’re being such a to me lately,” Seohyun pointed out. “Can I at least know what I did to make you act like this?” Yonghwa glared at the girl, but she had no intention of backing off.

“Nothing is wrong, just go to bed. I’m going to sleep in a bit too and I can’t have you bothering me,” Yonghwa shooed her away once more. Seohyun was not in a mood to be playing games with him, so she kept a firm stance.

“You’re lying. I know you well enough to know when something is up. Mind telling me why or do I have to ask you again? Ever since that kiss last night, you’ve been mad at me. If anyone should be mad it’s me since you did it forcefully and without my consent,” Seohyun sassily stated.

“It’s not because of th-that,” Yonghwa stuttered. It was obvious to Seohyun that it was about the kiss by the way he was acting. “Forget about what happened, I told you it was for revenge. Don’t think that it meant something to me, because it didn’t. I can go do it to some random girl on the street if you want reassurance.”

“I meant nothing to you huh? Well that’s good, because it meant nothing to me too. I’m glad we both feel the same way about it,” Seohyun lied stubbornly. “I already have a boyfriend in case you’ve forgotten. I hope our relationship doesn’t change since we are living together. Remember, we are just friends and we can never be more than that. I love my boyfriend and I’m sure you can understand that.” The absolute stupidity both of them were showing would make even the calmest person go berserk. If they hadn’t been so stubborn and childish, they would both see what they felt for each other.

“Well, that’s good Seohyun, that’s just perfect. I was meaning to define our relationship, but you just did me the favor,” Yonghwa replied in an almost sarcastic voice. “I’m glad we both realize that we can never be more than friends. I totally forgot you had a boyfriend and it makes me feel better that you say you love him. I’m heading to the bathroom so I hope you’re gone by the time I come back.”

“Don’t worry I’ll be gone by then,” Seohyun assured him. She didn’t even bother looking at him as he brushed past her forcefully. “Yonghwa, why do you make this harder for me? Why did I have to fall in love with someone like you? If only you could understand how much I want to be by your side…”

Yonghwa turned to look at Seohyun still standing in the living room as he reached the bathroom door. “Seohyun, you still haven’t realized that Seung Ri is a total jackass? Why do you have to like someone like him? I can’t control who you like, but can’t it be someone else? If you’re with him, I won’t be able to protect you from that jerk. If it were me by your side, I would make sure you never got hurt again…”

Once Seohyun turned to go back towards her new bed, Yonghwa quickly entered the bathroom. If they could put aside their pride and petty arguments, the two would realize just how much they needed each other. However, misunderstandings and problems always arose as they defended that foolish pride of theirs. In the end, the pair that longed for each other’s company spent a long and sleepless night as they thought of how wonderful it would be if they could set aside their differences.

 

 

Author’s note: Well problems, drama, and more problems came about in this chapter. If only people could just stop being jerks to each other and the whole world would be a better place. I’ve never found out the reason why people that like each other tend to keep it a secret from each other even though it’s so damn obvious. Glad I don’t like anyone haha. Sorry to all you guys that love the YongSeo lovey-dovey scenes, but I can’t make them happily ever after just yet. It will happen, just not now. Don’t know if I will be updating over the weekend since I’m usually busy with brothers/cousins/old friends/family but I’ll see what I can do

Mini-spoiler hint: Prom day. Just wait for it!