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Toma sat with Megumi as they looked at their psychology homework with dreading eyes. Unwilling to look at each other, they stared at the paper hoping it would disappear with fright from their fierce gazes.

“Get to know your partner.” They both said at the same time as they looked at paper. It rested sideways so they could both read it from their far distance apart from each other. Like hell they would sit beside each other when it wasn't necessary and they were in Toma's room.

Most papers would give you sample questions that were normal, like what hobbies do you enjoy?, but these questions were rather…revealing Megumi realized with fright. She didn't want to reveal anything about herself that could possibly be used against her to anyone, ESPECIALLY this in front of her.

For example Question 31) who was the first person you ever thought of having ual relations with and why?

WHY ON EARTH WOULD IKUTA TOMA OF ALL PEOPLE NEED TO KNOW THAT? IT WASN'T LIKE IT WAS IN HIS SCRIPT OR SOMETHING!

She didn’t want Toma to know whom she had thought of as the first person to have ual relations with. It was odd…and invading. Psychology was probably one of the worst classes she’d ever taken! What a horrible decision it was to switch from Law to this.

Then again some of the questions she wanted to know the answers to for Toma himself, she found herself being quite curious about questions like: When was the first time he cried?

Or did he ever try and cut his wrists himself?

Megumi had. It had been one of the worst times of her life really. Then again every time of her life was one of the worst times of her life.

But now that she'd been to help meetings she was fairly okay with it. She'd stopped cutting for a long time now.

It had been right after the first time she’d taken part in , and for some reason, doing it she knew right after was a complete mistake on her part. She had been 14. The guy had been at least 22. Kame had called her a and asked that she be removed from his house after he saw her enter a love hotel with a guy she'd met at a club she and Kame frequented.

He won and she was kicked out from her fathers home as well as abandoned by her mother's home.

She’d cut herself in multiple spots that time, that night. It had been the very first night she'd been out on the streets all alone.

She realized how much she missed her mother who'd been gone for at least a year or so. She'd died the very day Megumi had turned 13 and been snatched away from her according to the custody conditions.

She’d missed her mother; she’d wanted guidance and advice but her mother wasn’t there. She was dead. There was no way her mother could tell if she'd done right or wrong...there was no one there to hug and comfort her that it would all be okay. There was just that man...who was looking at her from across the street.

Eventually she'd gone with him to a love hotel as well. If it was already gone, she reasoned, she might as well be warm for this night before her father provided her with better accommodations than the streets of Tokyo.

She remembered her mother’s tears for her ‘father’ when she was younger. That had been the memory that had risen to the surface of her mind the second time she did it. The massive amount of tears she cried for the of a father that Megumi had. He'd kicked Megumi's mother out of the house that was half hers in the first place. All Megumi wanted to do was stab and hit him until he was-

“Oi, Megumi. Can we finish this quickly?” Toma said looking at her inquisitively and Megumi looked back in a bored manner. He'd interrupted her thoughts, but this time it was probably a good thing. People weren't supposed to imagine murdering their fathers.

“Why Toma Why??? We have the whole weekend to spend, and why won't you just spend it with-”

“With each other? I’d rather die,” He said sweetly and Megumi gasped fakely.

“I thought our hate for each other was all fake but I suppose you really do hate me don’t you?” She said pretending to be cute but of course Toma’s face showed no reaction her incredibly beautiful features…that of course most people thought had been bought but really the only thing she’d bought was her double eyelids.

But of course no one did try to believe her ever after the gossip that Mao had spread. Mao had found an appointment for her surgery on the table when Megumi had been nostalgic and looked at it again. She'd gotten it after a guy had told her eyelids were super plain.

Megumi had never corrected bothered to correct Mao's assumption. So no one ever found out that it had been just for the double eyelids.

“When was the first time you cried?” Toma asked in a manner that showed he could care less as to when was the first time Megumi cried.

“When I saw my mother cry. I was five. That’s my earliest memory of my tears.” She replied easily turning her glance away from Toma’s to hide the light mist that was forming over her eyes even now. Every time she remembered her mother she couldn't help it. The tears surfaced like she was chopping onions or something. Mother… how Megumi missed her. If she’d never died then Megumi would have never had to come to Eitoku or meet her family.

But then perhaps she wouldn’t have met Pi-chan.

“Oh.” Toma said his glare softening reflexively how much ever he tried not to make it so. He didn't want to seem like he was pitying her. Megumi was like him in this manner. She didn't like pity one bit. Neither did he. He knew it would only make her feel more exposed to him if he expressed pity.

He knew Megumi’s mom had died a while back. It had been all the news when she’d entered Eitoku Junior High for the first time, three months after school had started in the new year. Toma remembered seeing her accusing glares at everyone else and as she’d eventually gotten prettier and prettier everyone had started not ignoring her and seeking her approval. Everyone knew that she’d get picked up to be a powerful trophy wife one day. Girls like her almost always did. With their charming smile and good manners, and hidden passion..it was no wonder they were coveted by the erted old bachelors who spent most of their lives on their careers, and who had lost their true loves back when they were just as young as their now wives.

The only time he’d really started despising Megumi was after Mao. When she decided Mao wasn’t good enough…then Toma had defended Mao to the ends. It was odd he’d already known back then that it wasn’t normal to feel so protective over a girl you didn’t like and a girl for whom you definitely didn’t feel any brotherly feelings.

How he felt for Mao confused him incredibly but now that Yamapi was pushing him for it he decided that he would take her out on a nice private date tomorrow.

“When was the first time you cried?” Megumi asked him and he blushed as he raked through his hair with his fingers and laughed.

“Eto…do we really have to say it? After yours it sounds very stupid.” He said truthfully and Megumi gave a pouty face and poked him in the ribs across the table leaning over and she would have flashed him something with her lack of a bra under her loose shirt but Toma had no interest in any such thing... or at least Megumi's. It was obviously Yamapi's as she was meeting him up later he bet.

“Baka…I was a super strong kid that’s why I didn’t cry before that age and that event. Even when I scraped my knees I’d never cry. It can’t be that bad come on.” Megumi said urging him on and Toma shrugged. As long as these questions got done and he didn’t have to stay with Megumi any longer he supposed he’d want to do almost anything. Though their conversations might have looked like a friendly conversation to the outsider it was anything but. They just didn’t match, gel, mesh…or whatever the hell you wanted to call it.

He looked at Megumi and knew that the only reason they didn't get along was because she didn’t know anything but superficial. Or at least that was the image she gave out to the world, with her always freshly painted Yves Saint Laurent nails and her Hermes scarf around her neck that was long and elegant.

He wondered is she would...could understand his first tears…or would it take her longer to understand them? Much like himself.

He supposed he should lie about them as they were far to delicate a subject for him to touch upon at the moment but…would the psych professor be able to make out his lies? After all was it not her job to find out when people were lying to others and themselves and why they did so? At least if he spoke the truth he would have a way of molding the truth to be in his favor.

He decided to tell Megumi the truth. After all this would be the true test of how smart Megumi was, and if she guessed correctly the reason for his tears then perhaps he’d give her a chance as Yamapi’s girlfriend…his actual girlfriend and not one of those girls that Yamapi slept with for fun.

“I cried for the first time...when I saw Maki-chan.” He admitted, his head drooping automatically. Megumi gasped immediately. He slowly lifted his head up and looking at her wide eyes he almost hoped she’d get it all by herself and he wouldn't have to explain anything but then of course Megumi dashed his hopes.

“Was she that ugly?” She said shortly and at once Toma banged his head on the desk.

Would he really have to explain all this to her? Did she have to understand it?

Of course she would. This was psychology and that's the whole point of it. Understanding.

He really didn’t want to though!

It was supposed to be one of those moments between two characters where they discovered their deepest darkest secrets. But Megumi was wrecking every second of it as it went on. If she was acting with him he might have punched her out of having such a frustrating supporting actress.

“Ehh Toma-chan is it that horrible a memory to explain to me? You don’t have to if you don’t want to. I knew Maki had gotten surgery and this just proves it!” Megumi said quietly under her breath but obviously Toma could hear it. He looked up staring into Megumi’s face wondering exactly how stupid a person could get.

“It was exactly the opposite Megumi exactly the opposite. We were both around five."

MEMORY

"Okaa-san! Okaa-san! Yuu-kun hit me Okaa-san!" Toma yelled out to his mother running towards her but he found himself thrown towards the ground as he looked up to his mother. It had been her hand. But why?

"Go be a man Toma-chan! Show Yuu-kun what you're made of...Mama's busy neh? She's talking to Shirota-san!"

So Toma went up to Yuu-kun with all his might. He puffed out his shoulders like he'd seen those guys on T.V. do. But the moment he got there he was ignored and walked away from. Yuu-kun had walked away with all the girls and boys and left Toma with no one to play with.

30 Minutes later and it was exactly the same. He sat staring at one certain girl though. She'd caught his eyes when she'd thrown sand in Yuu-kun's eyes. For some reason she shone with such light from within her...and Toma was quite sure that she'd never been attacked by the cooties.

She seemed safe to go touch...and so he got up slowly and started towards her.

She saw him walking towards her too and she immediately smiled and Toma felt something wet slide down his cheek but he didn't really bother wiping it away. It was probably just a raindrop. Her eyes seemed to be the friendliest, open things that he'd ever seen. She seemed to be the kindest most captivating girl on the playground because the other's noticed her absence.

Especially Yuu-kun.

But they didn't bother following her. It was like she had them all in her hold.

Toma was in her hold too. He was so fazed that he didn't even realize that it hadn't been a rain drop but a tear drop that had fallen across his cheek until she reached the front of him and kissed his tear on his cheek.

"Don't cry...don't cry neh?" As if to make sure all traces of tears were gone she wiped the area with her hand and added an extra kiss.

Needless to say Toma was blushing beet red when she decided to leave him in his wake as he'd slumped to the ground again. Why had the girl done that? He'd though only his mother should do that.

But she'd done it and proved him wrong. She turned around to look at him and smiled. "Hitori ja nai...come play with us Toma-kun." So that was the feeling. He'd been feeling lonely? How was it that this girl had been able to pick it up and he hadn't been able to understand his own feelings. He stared after her in awe before he followed.

He never ever wanted to leave her side, he wanted to know everything about her...how she captivated them. He felt his hand slip into hers and together they raced to the sandbox ...and battled Yuu-kun.

/END MEMORY

"Yeah," He said and then crumpled onto the desk but not because he was embarrassed but by the power of the memory that he’d resurfaced.

Even now he was sure if he started crying that Maki would envelope him into a soothing embrace and whisper the sweetest words to him.

“Ehh so you’ve been friends with Maki-chan for that long?” Megumi said her eyes almost clouding over. That seemed like an extremely beautiful story to her. She’d always wondered why Toma had gazed at Maki so attentively. She realized that perhaps it was the need to be near her. To be near her beauty was to be happy for him.

She couldn't help but hope that perhaps one day Yamapi might feel that way for herself.

“OF COURSE NOT! Hheheenooo I only really met her in junior high. Don’t tell her neh that I said all this I’ll get all embarrassed and she doesn’t even remember me I bet and…hehe we should continue neh Megumi-chan?” Toma said nervously his face beet red as he quickly started looking through the page as if it was so much more interesting.

Megumi knew he was trying not to look too obvious, and she smiled reflexively. "I'm not an idiot Toma," She said softly resisting the urge to pat his head childishly. Yes there was far more to this man she hated.

But she didn't really want to find out unless it was part of their assignment. No matter how cute it was.

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More than 15000 miles away Aya Ueto was staring at her cell phone waiting for a phone call that seemed like it would never arrive and after she’d made sure that his call could come in with no disturbances from anyone else too.

“Baka…he knows he should call but he’s trying to boycott otou-san. Like anyone but Ryo can boycott otou-san.” Aya said sticking her tongue out at the screen, which was currently displaying a picture of Shun and her in their childhood years. Aya looked to be the prettiest little girl with the daintiest curls and she grinned widely. The real Aya grinned as well than the girl in the picture as she stared at her own young face and grinned wider when she saw her brother’s face. Shun wasn’t her true brother but he acted the most like one.

She’d never thought of Ryo as her brother, she’d always thought of him as someone she'd get married to later on. Now Shun she’d actually looked at as her brother. She couldn’t imagine ever thinking of him differently. In the picture he had the worst smile on his face and at least two teeth missing while Aya had all of hers present. It was a forced hug between the two but you could see that Aya was greatly enjoying her brother’s presence.

She’d always ed about him to her friends though cause she thought that was what you did about brothers. She'd never had one before, especially not a real brother, so she'd asked Blair for some tips.

Blair's advice?

You ed, you complained about their behavior and how they were freaks and stuff. Aya still did it to this day, as did Blair, she had no idea that Shun actually found out about her ing to her friends and was quite hurt by it.

“Oi bakaaa just call neh?” She said to the phone frowning at it as if it was doing something wrong. She was so tempted to call Jun but then she’d miss Shun’s call. Which would because she loved bantering with her brother. It made her feel very happy. Bantering with almost anyone made her feel happy really.

“Waiting for Shun to call? He won’t.” She heard a voice behind her say. She couldn't help but turn around immediately and gulp a little as she took in the sight of him.

He was wearing a shirt, it was pinstripe blue...and some blue navy pants...there was his tie. She recognized it as one she'd recently given him for his birthday. And he was wearing that smile...the one he'd never show anyone but her. He never even showed Shun that smile.

It was hard to be around him and not want to hug him and wrap her arms around him so tightly that he'd never be able to get away from her. People said that he had used her but she hadn’t felt used at all. She’d felt loved, every time she’d kissed him she’d felt perfect, and every time he touched her she’d felt cherished.

She was a precious jewel when she was with him, loved and held with such care...

She’d never felt uncomfortable, not the first time he’d ventured underneath her bra. She hadn't even been uncomfortable when their mother had walked in on them about to start their first time. This was only after they were completely in legal bounds to do it of course!

She’d felt safer in his arms than any other place in the world, as if he had been born to protect her. The door had creaked open... that night but Aya and Ryo hadn't paid attention as they held onto each other roughly the sheets wrapped tightly around them. Her mother had walked in and seen her young daughter of just fourteen a couple of days ago with her stepbrother and had screamed and yelled at Aya until they'd stopped kissing and turned to look at her.

Aya hadn’t minded being yelled and discriminated against. Ryo was worth it, Ryo was worth every small piece of her mother’s hate and everyone else’s judging stares, or in the girls' case glares.

Ryo was worth it all; as long as he was with her nothing would ever go wrong in her life. She would always be healthy. She’d feel happy. If they got kicked out of the house they’d manage somehow because in the end Aya knew that Ryo was worth every single look of disgust she received daily from the judging squadron of Park Avenue princesses.

She’d only really doubted herself and Ryo when they’d all been called into the conference room of Shueto where her stepfather was present looking at the two of them accusingly.

However otou-san had really only yelled at Ryo. Ryo was the only person that got shouted at and got punished.

Aya got off scotfree practically.

Was she worth it? She wondered. She’d always wondered if she was worth Ryo but was she worth him losing his career, his standing in the world as one of the smartest teens on the East Coast.

Was she worth it? She remembered going and questioning him too and of course he’d told her she was. He’d hugged her and collapsed in her arms that night, and of course they’d spent the night together doing everything but 'it'.

They'd refused to break up. Even after discovery.

However that didn’t stop Aya’s doubts, as it should have. She knew that he’d meant every word that had come out of his mouth but she couldn’t help but wonder.

Then one day it had happened. The most hurtful thing that could ever happen to any girl happened to her. It had been another of those stupid charity functions; it had been a year or so since their little love affair ended. She was now fifteen and even more in love with Ryo if possible. She'd suggested six months prior that they cool it because People had released a list of men to be careful of and Ryo was on it.

Being away from him, not kissing him in the darker more mysterious corners of the house had left her wanting even more of him than before.

Blair and Nate had been by her side, Serena had just left about a year ago and this was just before she returned back to New York.

While Blair was on a washroom break, Nate had been humoring Aya so that she wouldn’t stare at Ryo too long. Chuck had been trying to get into her pants as usual and of course it hadn’t really worked out for him. Jun had been glaring at her all night as if it was her fault his own friends weren’t talking to him. Back then, out of everyone in the group Jun was maybe the most hostile towards her. She knew it was because perhaps when she’d turned fourteen the year before and he’d confessed to her she’d killed him and his somewhat pathetic crush for her with her harsh words. She’d been so deep in her love for Ryo she hadn’t thought of anyone else.

And then she remembered this moment far too well. Blair had come up to her a look of urgency on her face as she’d dragged Aya with her. There had always been an unspoken rule that if they were sure the other girl wouldn’t believe the news one of them had to say to the girl they would drag the girl to see the news itself.

Aya was dragged to see Ryo…with another woman. They were laughing as they danced in their gorgeous ballroom outfits and Ryo held her close and whispered something in the woman’s ear. He spun her out and into his arms again and Aya’s tears started forming in her eyes and she remembered Blair hugging her immediately. Later the girl he was dancing with would be far too nice for Aya to hold a grudge against her.

She’d watched them silently as he’d moved her across the floor. She'd wondered if he could see her, probably not. She knew that Blair had blocked his view, she wondered if it would have made any difference. It seemed as if he was having far too much fun. She saw his hands sinfully move across her back in a way that was far too lustful for her liking.

He’d never done that to her...there had never been enough time for him to insinuate lustful expressions. She'd always been too young.

But this woman was just right for him.

Had she not been attractive enough for him to caress her in such a manner? Did he not love her anymore? She still loved him quietly as possible so that it would be able to pass under the radar. She’d stopped touching him but she’d kept on staring. The stares were enough for now…or so she’d thought, or rather, hoped. Aya's thoughts were so muddled she couldn't keep them apart for longer than a second.

Aya remembered Blair starting towards Ryo with a hateful expression on her face but Aya didn’t remember Jun coming up behind them.

What Aya did remember about Jun though was Jun pushing the other girl away roughly onto the floor. Aya remembered hearing her squeal of pain and she remembered relishing it as it seemed to almost sound like music to her ears.

Aya remembered watching her fall to the floor and hit it with such a bang that Aya herself was almost sure a bone must have cracked or something. Aya felt a small hint of a smile start on her face unwillingly. She didn’t want to be that spoilt but she couldn’t help it could she? She was the only daughter of the Shueto corp.

Aya did remember Jun punching Ryo in the face. Aya remembered Ryo falling to the ground of the wooden floor. Aya remembered Ryo and Jun staring at each other as if they were about to lunge on each other. Aya remembered the girl's confused glance in her direction. Aya remembered ripping her own dress so that it got shorter and throwing her heels on the floor, her first move to tomboy hood. Aya remembered Blair’s face of shock and Nate’s comforting pats. Aya remembered Koyama Keichiiro and Uchi Hiroki, Ryo’s best friends, coming up to Jun as if daring him to push them any further. Aya remembered Jun dragging her off away from the scene. Aya remembered the look of outrage her parents had had.

Most of all though…Aya remembered the look on Ryo’s face.

It had seemed to her as she stared back to look into the fallen prince’s eyes, to which she was eternally addicted to, they had spoken to her the words they had once promised to say to her for eternity. ‘I-love-you’. It had been the exact look that he’d given her the first night she’d fallen asleep in his arms, and the exact same look he’d given her just before their unofficial break up of her doubts of their staying together.

She flipped the phone shut now. The picture of her and Shun long forgotten, and looked back up at Ryo, who was behind her staring at her intently, his hot breath on the nape of her neck. It was the look he was giving her now, she realized. Automatically her eyes started watering. She’d cut her hair to change; she’d cut her dress to change at the party itself…so why hadn’t her heart cut out the piece of itself that belonged to Ryo so it could change the one it loved?

Why?

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A/N: I love AyaxRyo a lot right now. And TomaxMaki. I edited that one quite a bit so I'm not sure if this one or the other one was better.

*SLEEPY*

Actor's Conference! Will be upp...NEXT TIME! Next Week you get two episodes of Actor's conferences! I promise!

UNTIL THEN! I LOVE MY COMMENTERS!: Makitear-chan, xxing, zing, xxing(lol), Ichigokut3, vampyricblood87, deppfan, lenejima16, gl and last but not least...SARA!!!

Thank you all so much! (For letting me sleep tonight so I can add the conference tomorrow) AND FOR COMMENTING!

Please review again and tell me what you liked on the comments page! It helped me a lot. Thank you my readers for reading this much with me!