You have really caught me unaware.

“White tie? Black tie? Or smart casual? I am all prepared”, you said as you pointed at your luggage.

Who, other than the royalities, still does a white tie event now?  I suddenly realised what you are talking about. I laughed a little.

“Smart casual.”

“Let me accompany you,” you added, “be it whether you are going or not.”

“Thank you, Hyun.”

You, the bright icon, sunnier and brighter than that hanging in the sky, paused, and waited.

I thought for a while.

I was undecided although I know that I should go. With your words, the tension in my heartstrings loosened. Now, it seems that the catalyst to ride over my inertia has arrived.

“Are you sure you could pack white tie, black tie and smart casual all in your cabin luggage?” I asked.

The sound of your laughter is warm and soothing. It also shows that you understand, “Well, I have smart causal packed. With my well-proportional size (you made a pose), it should not be hard to rent white tie, or black tie attire.” You scratched the back of your head with your right hand and turned. That’s cute.

“Yes, yes”, I can’t help but agree, recalling the photographer’s comments about you.

It was late.

We boarded the nearly empty coach and took the seats near to the back, far from the other passengers.

I gave you my neck guard/pillow which I used on earlier plane ride. I have been in the air and transited more than 10 hours in total less than a day ago and is hitting the road again.

However, I am totally glad to be here. To ride and tide over this with you. 

“Are you hungry?” I passed you the sandwiches that we grabbed before boarding.

“Are you cold?” I handed you a flask of hot chocolate. I know you like this beverage. “The contents will keep you warm.”

You took a sip from my flask.

“There is a dent?” You pointed at the dent near to top of the flask.

“Yes. This (I held the well-used flask) has followed me round the continents. Whenever I am, it keeps my favourite beverage warm/cold whenever I need it. I dropped it once resulting in this dent. This added character and story to this flask.”

“You are sentimental.”

“Is that a compliment?” I joked.

You smiled. “Yes.”

“Why did you return?” you suddenly asked.

“I have something to tell you. I thought about it and wanted to tell you.”

Your eyes are bright and inquisitive.

“GD is a responsible man, who operates by the book. Pity is that he has too much on his plate and DBS was never his first priority. It is not because he doesn’t like her. He scolded her (maybe for her good?), showed her his girlfriend (no matter how strong DBS could be, that still hurts), reprimanded her on her brainlessness  – all these are done as he has been overly used to having her around, taking her for granted, and never for once feels that she needs a kind touch, a warm greeting, a respected conversation like they are equal. When he finally had a girlfriend, he realised how different a girlfriend is, to his close friend, what is friendship and what is not, at that juncture, he already wasted too much time.”

“Yes. ..  I mean the train that has left the depot will not return to where it is, in the exact same condition.”

“That is a classic example of too little, too late. He had years to say it. Yet he didn’t utilise it. It’s wrong timing, wrong person, wrong words.  Why is their timing is off? Probably because he did not go for it, or this relationship is not meant to be. GD realised that he has missed a great girl. His realization and regret arrived too late. That would be a life lesson for him. Yes, he is a good man, but there is only one DBS. Maybe it’ll be right one day, when the person is right.” I note that you are not sleepy yet. Thus, I continued, “MH is street smart, capable of managing himself and others, overcome his sadness yet maintain his jovial self. Yes, he could be conceited and irritating at times, but that imperfectness actually makes him much more believable and likable (to DBS at least). When he finds the one he likes, he opens up and goes for it (not abruptly) gradually, careful of not hurting her or himself, yet progressing ever so gently and courageously. The right words at the right timing. The right push at the right juncture. I could see his sincerity in his frank honesty. Regardless of whatever or whenever, DBS is always his top priority. He gives her respect, treats her as his equal, be her friend, her mentor, did ordinary yet extraordinary things for her (like changing his meal habits to see her more), yet not a lawnmower for her (as she still has to manage Team Leader and Sec Gong etc herself), and protects her, even knowing how physically strong she is. He reads her, even when she didn’t tell him that she likes him, he can see, he can read and figure out from all her body language. Deep down, he knows that she is not used to expressing love or her needs. That will take time. And they need time to learn and grow together.“

“Yes, MH is a man with breadth and depth. He catches and even creates the opportunity, whenever he can. He sees and treasures Bong Soon as she is, not attempting to change or mould her into something that she is not, values her strengths, hones and trains her into what she wants to be, gives her ample opportunities and encouragement.”

“Unlike Harry who misses Sally multiple times due to incorrect timings, words and circumstances, MH trusts his instructs and creates the timing for himself and her. And MH is totally himself with DBS. Just like she is just her true self with him. That’s the best possible combination. Their masks casted aside. There could be so much loneliness and isolation in her (from her unmeasurable strength) and in him (from his sad, lack of family love background). Probably no one understands loneliness better, or more personally, than they do. Loneliness .. it is like something creepy creeps in, in the most unexpected moments. Like you are the only one in a one-man island. It pains. That hurts. Only way to conquer it is to do something, fight it, go out and play, don’t let loneliness ambush and attack you. Believe in yourself, be confident, tell yourself that you can make it. Fight. “

“Yes, DBS is simple. She can see that fast. MH thinks too complicatedly. He is only enlightened by the simplicity of DBS. She has helped him, to find his real smile again. Affection, is something DBS gets little from mum, that she doesn’t get that from her crush. She only got hurt previously. To her, love is a simple street with only 2 pedestrians. A pedestrian should not be walking on multiple streets at the same time."

"When she reaches the right juncture, she teared and bid her expired crush goodbye, before moving on. She had closed one entrance, to be welcomed into a more suitable door. " You continued sipping the hot chocolate. The evanescent light from the street lamps was barely enough for me to see your expression. "Yes, I was watching it then and realised so much truth in it. With true affection, DBS opened up and faced it. That is not a matter of good or bad, right or wrong. This is more of a matter on whether the person is right, the timing is right, the chemistry is right."

You turned to look at me.

"Back to your earlier question, why am I here? - I thought you would like some company.”   I hope it does not sound intrusive. I just needed to tell you, to share with you on how I feel, “I just decided yesterday, after our call. I know that you don’t have to listen to me. But I know you want to face it too. So, if you like, we can meet it head-on. Now, is to close a chapter back from the early days completely and start afresh.”

Dew accumulated and circled in your eyes. You could see it clearly too. I seriously don’t understand how a talented and brilliant lady like you fail to see this simple point. Maybe it’s an issue of legacy, not lack of understanding.

“Yes.. you could be right.”

I am glad that you finally recognise this too as we are on the way to the event.

“I know you are strong but you have to learn to let others help you” I’ll support you, hopefully your heart will be mended in the process.

You teared. I know you understand the rationale behind.

“Thank you. For everything.”

“Don’t cry.” I handed you my handkerchief.

“How do you know so much? Speak so well?”

“Should say that I read and observe a lot."

You sniffed.

"You’ll survive and emerge stronger.” I arranged the few errant strands on your fringe.  “A doctor can’t cure himself. A psychologist often needs to see another to keep himself sane and objective." The regular rocking rythum of the moving coach is making one sleepy. I can see that your eyes are starting to close. "Catch some rest now."

I felt your head on my shoulder when I woke up from my nap. My neck was stiff but I stayed still.

I didn’t have the heart (or would risk) to wake you.

I took a second nap. My right hand covering your left.