The holidays of december came faster than I had expected. I hadn’t done much expect hang out with my friends and Chen which I could continue to do for the rest of my life. It’s just that time flew by so fast and everything in my life was going so well yet it felt like something was missing. I didn’t know if it was the stress that came with school and just deciding what I wanted to do or worrying about my grades being good enough or if it was just a void in my societal life. There was just a fire that I used to have that was gone.

Before I was always energetic, smiling and just happy but recently none of that was displaying and it was beginning to show. My friends noticed it, my dad noticed it and Chen who spent the most time with me was the most aware of it. He had asked me what was wrong so many times but I had no answers to give him because I didn’t know. Our relationship was fine and he was the best partner yet I was so down.

It was Tuesday and I had just been out with Tao on a late Christmas present shopping spree. When I entered the apartment at around 6pm, I found Mrs. Kim, my father and Min Ho there.

“Noona”, he greeted me with a hug. In just the past months, Min Ho had grown so tall. He was at my height now. He had also let his hair grow out which made him look cuter.

“Oh!” I was so happy to see them although I had seen them a week ago. I just missed having them around so much every chance I got to spend with them was precious. “Min Ho ah! Mrs. Kim!”

“Ji Eun”, Mrs. Kim pushed away her son and hugged me. “Look at how skinny you keep becoming now that I’m not around.” Mrs. Kim was doing it on purpose to annoy my father. She and him had been arguing back and forth about our living situation ever since we’d left. Everyone was over it really.  “Do you feed her properly?” She asked my dad.

“Of course Tae Ri ah”, my dad smiled.

“I want you guys to come back home. This neighbourhood has always given me the chills.”

“You heard about the robbery?” I asked. A few days ago, an old lady had been robbed by four young men nearby which kind of spook me out. What type of person were you if you ganged up on an elderly person just because they were easy pray? Mrs. Kim’s eyes widened.

“What?” She asked. “What robbery?” My father closed his eyes. “Jae Hyun ah! There was a robbery and you didn’t tell me?”

“I didn’t want to worry you”, he said. “But it was alright. The police are looking for the culprits and I’ve spoken to the landlord, the old lady is fine. Everything’s fine.”

“Dang it Jae Hyun ah!” Mrs. Kim said. “Why don’t you get it?”  I turned towards Min Ho.

“Why don’t you and I go buy something?” I asked. “Anything you want.” I didn’t want to be present when my father and Mrs. Kim were arguing, again. I had heard enough the past few months.

“Do you like getting your room back?” I asked Min Ho once we were outside.

“I haven’t gotten it back”, he said.

“Why?”

“Because mom still thinks you will return”, Min Ho explained. “She keeps yelling at Hyung and hyung ignores it.”

“Is it that bad?” I asked. I recalled seeing Kai in school several times ever since that incident at my dad’s restaurant. He had not talked to me or even looked at me.

“Noona”, Min Ho stopped walking.

“Yes?”

“There’s something I want to tell you but if I do hyung is going to kill me.”

“What is it?”

“Hyung is s...” Min Ho sighed and his head wobbled. “No, it’s nothing. Let’s go.” I went along with him without thinking much about the thing he wanted to say. When we came back home, the arguing had stopped. My father and Tae Ri were having a normal conversation and laughing at that. At around 9pm, Min Ho and Mrs. Kim were ready to leave but before going Mrs. Kim whispered in my ears.

“I made a deal with your father”, she said. 

“What deal?” I asked.

“Don’t worry about it”, she winked. “I’ll see you guys on Thursday for Christmas dinner. Be early!” She waved goodbye and left with Min Ho at her side.

“Kim Tae Ri”, my father said when she was gone. “I forgot how stubborn she could be.” He laughed leaving me more curious about their deal.

The next day, I had no plans. Everyone in the crew was busy with something. Tao was at the studio working on music while Se Hun was at the gym with Alice due to her squatting. Lime was performing in Anyang and Lu Han was at my father’s restaurant. He had also gotten a job there. This seemed to be the  trend lately. Everyone worked at my dads restaurant, except me.

Chen was also busy as he had a photo shoot. Exo had released a Christmas song that was doing extremely well and they where shooting for the next year’s calendar book.

My phone rang.

“Hello?” I answered even though the phone number was unknown.

“Guess who?” I gasped when I recognized the person at the other end.

“Kris!”, I sang in glee.

“You remember me”, he said.

“We hung out two weeks ago”, I reminded him. “Why are you calling? I thought you had a photo shoot."

“I’m in the middle of it”, he said. “But I thought you might want to get your over here because Chen can’t stop blabbing about how lonely you must be.” I laughed. Chen had been pestering me to come with him to the photo shoot but I declined because I didn’t want to bother the rest.

“Fine”, I said. “I’ll be there.”

“Great”, Kris said. ”Don’t forget to bring a smile.” I laughed and hung up.

About an hour later, I entered the set of the photo shoot. People were in the middle of lunch and some were still working. Everyone in the group besides Chen and Kris were having lunch so I tiptoed to their sides and poked Baek Hyun and D.O (one of the guys in the group). The two of them were extremely ticklish.

“Guess who?” I said.

“You have to stop doing that”, D.O smiled.

“You came”, Baek Hyun hugged me. I hugged everyone around the table.

“Just for a moment”, I said. “I’ll leave soon.”

“So you come running as soon as Chen asks for you huh?” Su Ho the leader of the group asked. “Are you guys officially boyfriend and girlfriend now?”

“We’re no...”

“If it isn’t Go Ji Eun”, Kris was shirtless yet he didn’t shy away and hugged me just like that in front of everyone. This guy had no care in the world although he was an idol and all eyes where on him. “Your man is the last one up. We’ll leave once he’s done. Do you want to go to th…”

“No”, I said. “I’m not going anywhere you’re taking me.”

“Why not?” Kris put on a shirt.

“Hmm I don’t know?”, Chan Yeol said mouth full. "Maybe cause you’re a troublemaker."

“Because of the cops?” Kris laughed. “Oh come on! That was fun.”

“I still can’t believe I missed that”, Su Ho said with regret.

“I’m sure Kris will make all of you go through something like that soon enough”, I said.

“And I’m sure you will be part of it too”, Kris winked.

“I’m done”, Chen joined us. “Shall we g- Ji Eun?” I waved at him. “What are you doing here?” We hugged.

“Kris called”, I answered. “And voila.”

“I’m glad you came”, he put my bangs behind my ear. “I was thinking we could have some pizza and then we could go home to my place and watch h-” He looked at his friends who were all looking at us. “Forget it.”

“No”, D.O said. “We could have pizza and what Chen?”

“Yes Chen”, Kris folded his arms. “What are we going to do after having pizza?” I tried hard not to laugh. Chen looked so lost when the guys were teasing him.

“Just leave them be”, Baek Hyun said.  Chen scratched his head and left looking flustered. 

“We should return the clothes”, Kris said. The others followed him, but Su Ho stayed. Once they were gone, he stood in front of me.

“Ji Eun”, he said. “I know that you and Chen are in a some and I don’t know if you’re getting more serious or not but you must remember a few things. We have debuted and are very busy. Neither of us wants an unnecessary scandal nor do we want Chen to lose focus. We all need to be at the top of our games. If Chen is emotionally unstable he mig-”

“Ji Eun ah”, Chen called. “Let’s go.”

“Remember what I said”, Su Ho left. I turned to him before going to Chen.

“What were you talking about?” Chen asked.

“Nothing”, I smiled. “Aren’t we having pizza?”

“Not anymore”, he said. “I’ll take you home instead.”

Chen and I left the set and hopped in one of the managers cars. On our way there, I was thinking about what Su Ho had said. He was right. Chen and I were in a some but although I was fine with this situation I could see how Chen would sometimes worry about what we were. He always asked about how I felt about our relationship, towards Kai and etc.. Was it a sign that Chen wasn’t confident in the thing we had or was I overthinking it like I always did? 

Deep down I knew Chen wanted us to be official but wasn’t on my case about it because of me and the uncertainties of my feelings towards the other one. Chen had always been so respectful of my feelings and wishes yet I always seemed to overlook his. Maybe all our relationship needed was a boost of making things more official?

“What are you thinking so deeply about?” Chen asked. I looked at him. “Ji Eun?” I truned to him. 

“Come to the Christmas dinner on Thursday”, I said.

“What dinner?” Chen asked.

“At the Kim’s”, I said. “I want to tell everyone we’re dating.” His eyes widened and a smile crept on his face.

“Are you serious?” He asked. I nodded. I felt my heart race due to my nerves but I could also feel something else. I was ready to present him to the family as the guy I was currently seeing. Chen kissed me in pure glee.

“No kissing in the car”, the manager said. Chen immediately pulled away and I chuckled.

“I’ll be there”, he said. “I also have a little surprise.”

“What surprise?” I asked.

“Your birthday is coming up on Saturday”, he smiled. “So I’m picking you up At 7pm for a little date date.”

“Where are we going?” I asked. Chen simply smiled and pulled me closer to him.

Thursday 

Although Mrs. Kim had said to come early, I had arrived to the Kim’s residence at around 1pm. I had overslept due to being late on the phone with Chen. He was so nervous about the Christmas dinner I had to calm him down all night. The Kim’s house was in festive mode already. Christmas music was bumping in the living room, all the curtains where wide open and it smelled so freaking good. Dinner was starting at 5 so I didn’t get ready at home. Instead I packed what I was going to wear along with makeup and everything and came in my pajamas. 

“Good morning!” I said loudly in the hallway. Mrs. Kim’s head poked from the kitchens doorway.

“It’s lunch Ji Eun ah”, she said with a smile. “And you’re late.”

”I’m sorry”, I smiled. ”I’ll make it up to you quickly.” I joined her in the kitchen. Everything was a mess. “What do you want me to do?”

“Let me handle the food”, she said. “I want you to go get Kai and fix the decorations in the dining room and the rest of the house. Everything is in the basement. By the time I finish I want this house to look like Christmas.” I nodded and was about to leave the kitchen when I remembered. 

“Tae Ri ah”, I began. “I... uhm... invited Chen to the dinner. I know I should have told you earlier but I have a really good reason.”

“Good reason?” Mrs. Kim narrowed her eyes. “Isn’t Chen very busy at the moment?”

“Yes”, I blushed. He was super busy but for me, he tried his best to find some time. “But not tonight.”

“Alright. He’s always welcome.”

I smiled before leaving the kitchen. I didn’t want to get Kai. He was barely speaking to me so I couldn't imagine having to work with him to decorate the house.

As I made my way upstairs with my things, I knew this was going to be a Christmas nightmare. I put down everything on the sofa and walked to Kai’s door. I was about to knock when the door opened revealing a just woken up Kai dressed in sweatpants and no shirt. 

“Hi”, I said. “Your mom wants us to decorate the house and make it more christmassy.” He stood there with one hand holding the door and the other just hanging. “She said everything is in the basement but I don’t know where that actually is.”

“Come”, he finally said.

I had never been to the Kim’s basement before which was odd considering I had lived at their house for more than half a year. Their basement was outside of the house and at first sight, I felt it was too clean and organised to be seen as a basement. It didn’t take long for us to find the boxes containing all types of decoration. We carried them upstairs to the living room where the tall Christmas tree was located.

“Where do you want to start?” Kai looked at me. His eyes were a bit hidden behind his curly hair but I could still see them. “I think the Christmas tree will go faster?” I agreed and we began our task. 

Just like I expected he and I didn't even speak once during decorating the tree. All I could hear was our breathing. Once we were done with the tree, I stepped back to admire our work. Kai did the same as me.

“Wow”, I let out. Since he was standing next to me, the heat coming from his body was affecting me. Once again, being next to Kai made me feel and think things I knew I shouldn’t be. 

“Wanna go ahead with the rest of the house?” Kai turned to me. I quickly nodded, grabbed a box and went upstairs. Kai followed suit and we continued our work. When we where done we went to the kitchen to get ustensils to set the dining table up. When we were done with placing the ustensils, we sat down in the mini living room upstairs and began doing origami napkins. I don't how long we sat there but it felt like the napkings never ended. Eventually Kai, whom for a short while I suspected might have gone mute, turned to me.

“Here”, he handed me a red rose origami he had made. I looked at with a doubting mind, debating whether it was for me or for the dinner table decoration and he was just asking me to add it the lot of origmais we had made. “For you.” A smile quickly crept up my face but I shook it off.

“Thank you”, I accepted it. I continued with the origami while thinking of a conversation topic since Kai had broken the ice. “How come you work at dad’s restaurant?”

“I don’t”, he explained. “I’ve been helping out when I can, that’s it.”

“So you work for free?” I asked. I had a little hard time seeing Kai do something without it benefiting him in some way. When he didn’t answer, I continued with the decoration but with one more question in the back of my mind I couldn’t concentrate. I put everything down and turned to him.

“So we’re on speaking terms now?” I asked. He continued to work on his napkins. "Kai, it's been two months. Are we just going to pretend wh-!

“I didn’t mean to be mean to you”, he interrupted me. “Or ignore you. I just needed to be away from you and that’s the only way I knew how. I’m sorry if I came across the way I did.” 

Wow, a sincere apology from Kai and I didn’t even have to tell him what he did wrong. I guess he really needed time away from me again, since the Paris travel didn’t seem to do much. But then again that was four months in total Who needed that long to think about how they feel? Kai was indeed... special.

“Your ways”, I sighed, “Are not the nicest.”

“I’m aware of that”, he agreed. We continued with the origamis but then I remembered I had one more question.

“So what conclusion did you come to?” I curiously asked after a while. I knew he was probably not going to answer. However when Kai turned to me, I saw something in his eyes I had never before.

“That I’ve been in love with you since Min Ho’s accident”, he casually answered with his eyes fixated on me.

As I was trying to gather what he had just let out, Min Ho came up the stairs. I immediately got up and ran to the bathroom. Once there, I just sat down on the toilet, heart racing and with my head leaned against my shaking hands. 

A/N

And Kai finally came out with the big words!!! Yeah!!! What will Ji Eun do with this confession now that she "is" with Chen?

On the next update I will be releasing two chapters as they are actually one chapter that I divided into two. Look forward to it because something you do not expect will be revealed ;)

I'm probably releasing it tomorrow or on saturday since I'm so excited :D

Replying to comments:

@aftermidnight265  : I know I feel bad for Chen too but Ji Eun does like him. If only she was over Kai. 

@aIcAiNothing  : Thanks for your compliement on the story and I'm so sorry about your pet peeve. I do try to write it correctly but it's so confusing, and english not being my third language doesn't make it easier :( I hope to get better with it in the future :)

@Handoongi  : Well he is not so confused anymore is he? ;)