"... of brilliance, clarity and cleanliness, gentle conversations, washed hands, clean clothes and good manners. This was the world in which morning hymns were sung and Christmas celebrated. Straight lines and paths...", Namjoon continued reading as you sat on his lap, leaning your face against his shoulder, while listening to his voice. You looked up to see him smiling while enjoying Hesse. He noticed you looking at him and asked, what's wrong. You  answered, that it's nothing, you just enjoyed hearing his voice. He kissed your (Y/H/C) hair and continued reading. You felt him moving a little bit to make himself more comfortable. As he finished the second chapter, you asked him on which "side" Hesse would have put love since it can be bright and also dark. "I think it would be on the bright side since real love is a pure feeling. The other things, the ones which you could consider as dark are a side effect of love."  You were fascinated from his answer but it wasn't surprising to hear something philosophic like that from Namjoon.  You could understand his point of view but for you, love could also mean pain. The pain off not being with your loved one or the pain while thinking that  he might leave you one day. Of course you didn't tell him about you worries, but he already figured that something bothers you. "What are you thinking right now, (Y/N)?" he asked curiously. "Huh? Nothing.", you uttered, hoping that you could tell a believable lie only this once. "Come on, tell me.",  Namjoon responded to your ridiculously  bad lie. You finally gave up and explained  your opinion to him. Obviously you didn't tell him about your worries of leaving you, but you didn't even have to, he already figured that out by himself. Wrapping his arms around you and holding you tight, he scolded you for thinking that he would ever leave you. "I really, really love you, Namjoon.", you whispered, still caught in his hug. "And I really, really love you more, (Y/N)." ,he whispered back before kissing your (Y/H/C) hair.