Today something weird happened or something weird is happening; Roseanne hasn’t left the room not even a second in the entire day. The apartment felt cold, empty, in silence, it was an almost somber atmosphere even though her insides were crazy, messy, yelling at her, scolding her.

Jungkook’s words were echoing in her mind, like if she had it on repeat although all she wanted to do was stop listen to those, because if she needs to be honest, what he said was truth, she is not doing anything with her life, her life is being a total waste and she can’t bring herself to actually enjoy it. She is playing the victim, the poor girl, the bad rotten flower that will surely rotten the rest around her.  

She is a bad influence.

Is that really a life? Is that really something she will feel good about? She was never the same since her father started to abuse her, to beat her, to make fun of her, to make her his clown, and now, Jungkook has destroyed her heart by telling her the truth and making her world collapse once again. She shouldn’t be crying, she for sure should just go out to do something but she wasn’t very enthusiastic about go out, she was more agreed to just let this cold and hard floor be her home now.

If it was other person the one that would’ve said that to her, she for sure would laugh it off and just enjoy life like she so often do, to brag in that person’ face how she doesn’t give a single about his opinion, just like the cheer, rebel girl she loves to be, but this time… it was him; the person who told her those words were the one she was looking approbation from, it was the one she wants to be agreed to her in everything, to accept her in everything and it hurts a lot that she is actually questioning herself why is truly living?

Her door knocked but she didn’t flinch from her fetal position.

“Roseanne...” Jungkooks voice echoed outside.

But only made her cry even more; she shut her eyes close.

“Please open the door”

She shook her head.

“You haven’t eat anything and,” His voice cheered a little. “I just got back from school and brought pizza”

Nothing. “Go away!”

He sighed. “Please, forgive me… open the door”

“No!”

He didn’t say anything else after that which made her think he give up on her and left which is good, that is better because that would make her choice way easier, she will make it faster than she thought she could. Eat something is the least thing she wants right now plus not see anyone, the dark of her room is probably what she wants the most.

The hours passed with her staring at the ceiling contemplating the choices she has and she wants to have; she noticed the sun was starting to lose light, that her curtains started to get dark and her eyes didn’t caught anything else but the little lights that the street  provided.

She is now imagine herself flying in the sky like a beautiful leaf while all her problems stay behind, she felt so carefree, so on her place… maybe she should just… kill herself; that would make everyone happy including Jungkook who looks very stressed and sad because she is distracting him too much and he would probably fail in everything if he keeps following her.

Then a huge hit on the door sounded, making her jump in her position. Something hot crept on her body, maybe was fear; the knock on the door sounded exactly as her father use to do what he wanted to have fun with her; and she felt, once again, scared and with so many desires to run away; her mind started to play games on her when she heard the voice of her father in the distance, telling her to ‘come close’ which she knows was the sign for a great beat up.

She started to step back towards the wall and protected her head with both hands, until…

“I got you a surprise!” The enthusiast Jungkook again.

How many hours have passed? Like a lot? She took her hands off her head and stared at the door. It was Jungkook all along and even if she wants to hate him for treat her so harshly and for not take care of his words, his voice, his husky smooth voice make her feel peace; that was why she decided to walk towards the door to open it.

When she got the enough strength, what she saw in the other side caught her off guard.

It was a blue door.

Roseanne gasped, the tears were still coming out her eyes but this time with a little of brightness.

Jungkook peeked his head from behind the door. “Do you like it?”

She only nodded, watching the door like it was a gorgeous painting.

“I wanted you to feel protected” He started to say. “Maybe from my stupidity”

She chuckled under her breathe as she caressed the blue wood. “It’s so pretty”

He smiled, proud of himself. “I, I really sorr-”

“It doesn’t matter anymore Jungkook”

It can be stupid, but for her that door is a sign of protection, a sign that he will never knock the door again to say or do anything; her childhood made her believe that kind of thing; for her is a symbol not just a door painted in blue.

“I’ll putt it!” Jungkook said, really excited.

Roseanne smiled. “How would you do that?” As she dried her tears, she said.

“I don’t know… with a guide I guess”

“And if you get hurt?” Roseanne asked him.

“You’ll kiss my wound”

That made her laugh a little. “You’re so stupid”

Since she rejected the word pizza he knew she was serious with this. She is mad, she is sad; she is everything plus hating him right now. He should be more careful with his words; he is too honest or too proud sometimes. He changed his uniform to sport clothes and sat on the couch, reflecting. If food didn’t took her out, if he can’t even take her out with only the sound of his apology then he most do something way stronger than that, he should level up… and that’s when he realize what he had to do although it would cost him half of what he had save for University proposes.

“I want a blue door” He said.

The man in front of him nodded. “Do you want it for a re-styling or for constructions? And can I ask how many?”

Jungkook frowned, confused a little. “I just… I want just one door”

“Only one door?”

He nodded with cute smile. “And blue” He repeated.

“Well,” The seller took out a magazine of the different tones of blue he had on the store. “We have King Blue, Hard Blue, Electric Blue...”

His voice trailed out when he saw the one she would love. “That one” He pointed.

“Oh, ok,” The other said. “Do you want us to trans-”

“No, no, no, no” Jungkook waved his hands in front of him. “I can take it by myself”

If someone saw a man in the streets of Seoul taking a heavy blue door, it was probably Jungkook. It was heavy yeah, and his fingers were starting to get red from the pressure but he was 100% sure she would love this gift. Not even if she doesn’t forgive him he will feel sad or disappointed, with this he will feel a little good, it will remember to the only one good part of her childhood.

When he arrived all the security he had ran away like a coward, he now was 0% sure if she would actually like that; would she think he is buying her? Would she think he is using something so precious to her like an excuse for an apology? Oh my God, what about if she slaps him in the face? How can he ran awa