Y/N

“Seriously... Park freaking Jimin… Tricking me into this.” I cursed and murmur to myself while fiddling with the cup of tea in my hands. I’m currently sitting in a café waiting for Jimin. Am I too early or is he late? I glance at my own watch to look at the time to only realise I’m 30 minutes early. How great can this be. Just how excited are you that you came so early Y/N ah?! Mentally scolded myself while I rolled my eyes.  To my surprised, Jimin was early as well. The door of the café swings opens to reveal Jimin stepping into the café. He scans the surrounding and finally landed his eyes upon mine, with his eyes lit up immediately.

“Hey Y/N, sorry to keep you waiting. I thought I was early enough.” Jimin settle down into the chair while flashing me his crescent eye smile.

“Uh. Yea. Glad that you know you came later than me when it’s you the one who asked me out.” I spat sarcastically back at him and turn to look out the window. His smile is just too blinding for the good of my heart. I heard little giggle coming from him but manage to control myself not to turn around.

“Well, I didn’t expect you to be so excited about the date that you turned up so much earlier than me. I thought I was early despite coming 30 minutes earlier but was honestly surprised to see you here already. If you’re that excited to see me you should have just said so babe.”

The heck?! Why is he always so full of himself?! I turn around catching him staring into at my face intensely.

“For godsake. Don’t put words into my mouth. You’re the one that trick me into this date. Don’t be so full of yourself. I can’t wait to get this over and done with.” Trying to keep myself as calm as possible while my heart keeps beating at an insane irregular beat. God Y/N, calm the hell down. It’s only Jimin. You can’t let him get to you.

“Can’t wait to get over this date and have the second date already?” Jimin tease while still looking handsome effortlessly.

“….” I’m totally speechless at how shameless and thick skin can he get.

“I usually take silence as an agreement. So that means yes to me.” Jimin continued.

That’s it. I really can’t stand it any longer. I gather my bag and stood up.

“You done? If that’s what you want to continue, I’m out of here.” I was about to turn and leave but Jimin stop me before I could.

“Alright alright. Look, I’m sorry ok. Just wanted to lighten the mood. Let’s go for a movie. I have already bought the ticket. It’s the movie you have always wanted to watch. I know you love movies related to dance.” I felt a pang of guilt hits me when I saw the slight hint of sadness in his eyes. Was I too harsh on him? Probably not. He deserved that. Before I even give him a reply, Jimin took my hands into his and guided me out of the café. I was surprised at his action but can’t help but to feel warmth spread across my cheeks while I stare fondly down at our hands interlocking. His hands are small but it still fits perfectly into mine like we were meant to be. Wait… What the hell?! This is not how it’s supposed to be!

“YAH! Let go of my hand! We are in public you idiot!” I tugged onto our interlocked hands using my free hand trying to pry free.

“Shh. No one will recognise us with our disguise.” Of course, I know no one will with our sunglasses and hats and all. It’s an excuse for you to let go of me! Take the hint already that I’m feeling uncomfortable with the situation right now you idiot!

“N-no. As in… Still, situation can be unexpected! Better safe than sorry, right?! You’re an international star right now. You can’t be caught in a scandal…” Expecting Jimin to agree and let my hands go but instead his grip tighten even more than before. He stops abruptly in his tracks causing me to bump into him. He turns around and took hold of the other hand as well. 

“Look Y/N, I know what I am doing and it doesn’t matter if people find out about us. I have already made up my mind and figured everything out. You are my number one priority. If people start bashing me I wouldn’t care less but if they bash you, I will do everything to protect you. Everything else doesn’t matter to me right now. It’s just you. You matter a lot. So, trust me Y/N. Let me take the lead be it today or future dates.”

“…..”

“Like I said, silence is a yes.” Jimin turn and continue leading me towards the theatre while I glance at his back, letting him drag me along.

What do you expect me to say when you state things that way? I’m not over the hurt you cause me years ago and not over the trauma my childhood inflicted on me. My whole life had crumbled and vanished into thin air the moment you left and I finally managed to piece back little pieces with the arrival of my foster parents but you just had to stride right back into my life treating me all gentle with your words and actions like before, expecting me to act like things will be fine. Why can’t you just treat me like nothing while I take my revenge? You’re messing up every single plan and resolves I have right now Minnie and it’s difficult to be sane with the voices in my head…

“Y/N…”

“Y/N! You okay? We’re here.”

“O-oh. Sorry.”

“Are you alright? You’re spacing out. If you’re feeling unwell we can just head home, we don’t have to continue with this date.”

“No… It’s alright. I’m fine. Let’s just head in. The movie is starting.”

“You sure?”

“Yes Jimin. I’m sure. Stop nagging and acting like my dad, dude.”

“I’m worry about you. Sigh. Fine. Just tell me if you feel unwell halfway.”

I couldn’t even pay attention to the movie screening right now. I’m supposed to be watching the life of the person in the movie but instead it feels as if my life is being play right in front of me.

“Mummy! Daddy! It’s my birthday tomorrow! Can we please go to the amusement park today? Pretty please!!”

“Silly girl. Of course. Anything for my precious Solhee. Sit tight and hold on to your balloon while daddy is driving.”

“Solhee ah stop throwing the balloon around. Don’t disturb daddy while driving.”

“But daddy!! I just wanted to play with you! HERE A BALLOON!”

“YAH SOLHEE-- “

Honking and screeching sound of tires can be heard. Bright light coming directly in the direction of our car. The last thing I heard before losing consciousness is the sound of a stranger yelling to call for an ambulance.

I woke up in a hospital blinking profusely but panicked when all I can see is darkness.

“MUMMY!! DADDY!! WHERE ARE YOU!!”

I felt someone grab onto my hand and pulled me into a hug.

“Shhh. Solhee ah. Don’t worry, aunt will be here.  Mummy and daddy… They went to where grandpa and grandma is.”

“What do you mean auntie…? Does that mean I won’t get to see them anymore just like grandpa and grandma?”

“Yes…”

“NO IT CAN’T BE. THEY PROMISE ME THEY WILL NEVER LEAVE. THEY SAY THEY ARE TAKING ME TO THE AMUSEMENT PARK.” I broke down crying and sobbing nonstop. When I finally calm down, aunt lay me down to rest and went out. I was about to fall asleep from all the crying until I heard shouting and whispering outside the ward door.

“Poor Solhee. Losing her parents on the day of her birthday.”

“It’s her fault. If she didn’t pester her parents to bring her to the amusement park this wouldn’t happen. She’s an unlucky child.”

“Shh. What are you saying! She’s just a child!”

“Whatever. I don’t agree to taking her into our care. The doctor isn’t even sure if she can get her vision back. She’s practically a burden to take care of. We don’t have the capability to do that either. We’re sending her to the orphanage.”

“How could you! She’s your sister daughter. How can you be so heartless?!”

“What I said is final. End of discussion.”

Something snapped inside me that day. I was a disastrous child that cause my parents death. No one will want me and I’m a burden even to my own family.

“We’re here Solhee. This will be your new home from now on. Try to get along with the rest of the children alright. They will be your brothers and sisters.”

“Yes aunt…”

“Are you the caretaker here? We will be leaving her in your care.”

“No worries. She will get use to here soon.”

“Solhee ah, aunt will be leaving. I will come back and see you soon.”

It’s a lie. I know she won’t be coming back for me. I’ll be living here from now on. My own blood related family abandoned me when I needed them the most.

“Look at her! She’s blind! Ewww. I don’t want to play with her.”

“Yeah! She’s disgusting. Who knows she will pass me her disease!”

“GO AWAY ALIEN!”

“YAH! What are you kids saying?! It’s just temporary that Solhee can’t see. Get along well with her and don’t bully her! If not you all won’t be getting dinner tonight! Now apologise to her while I go prepare the dinner.”

“ITS YOUR FAULT THAT WE GOT SCOLDED BY AUNTIE!”

“YEA!”

I felt several hands pushing me around till I fell onto the ground. This is where all the bullying first started. As time passes and as we grew, bullying got worst and I was the outcast in the orphanage. Despite having regain my sight, I continued receiving harassment from the other children. My life went downhill and hit rock bottom the day my parents left. I felt hollow and helpless until the day I met Jimin. He was my light. My saviour. The strength that kept me going despite the tattered shreds I’m in. I let him into my world to only have him ripped apart my heart and left me hanging. Bringing me up and slamming me back down into the dark abyss. 

The loud sound of the movie snapped me back into reality. My heart throbbed in pain. I felt tinging hits my eyes and tears started streaming down silently. I feel downright shaken at my own feet, no doubt, this is a wrong timing to recall my past while having Jimin seated right next to me. That’s when I felt Jimin grab my hand and trace little circles on the back of my hand. I turn to look at him to only witness him looking right back at me with those concerned eyes of his. He raises his hand to wipe the tears away from my cheeks and mouthed “I’m right here” to me. Liar. He’s a liar. The voices rang in my head. I quickly retract my hand and turn my attention to the screen without acknowledging what Jimin did. The rest of the movie time was uncomfortable to me at least.

“Did you enjoy the movie?”

“Yea. I did. It was wonderful.” I lied. I wasn’t paying attention at all and it was the worst movie time I had in my whole life. Jimin knew I was lying but I was grateful that he decided not to press on about what happened during the movie.

“It’s late. Let’s go grab some dinner before I send you back. Will that be okay?”

“Yea. Why not.”

We entered a small restaurant just around the corner. To my surprised, there’s quite a crowd even though the place looks unassuming. I noticed there are several photographs of celebrities being pinned to the sides of the walls. Ahh… So, this place has been recommended by TVs before. I wasn’t hungry but Jimin took it upon me, helping me place an order despite me telling him a smoothie was enough. He insisted that I should at least take a few bites stating I was skinny enough.

“I come here pretty often” Jimin said while turning his attention from the waiter to me.

“Yeah? So, here’s where you bring all your previous dates on?” I replied while staring out the window.

“You know that’s not what I meant Y/N.” Jimin said while raising his eyebrow.

“I’m just joking. We can see the beach from here. The sky is beautiful at this time of the day. I can watch the sunsets and sunrise go on forever.” Still looking out the window toward the beach, not gracing Jimin a look.

“It’s nice here. I come here often to relax and take my mind off things. Figured you will love it too.”

“Mmhmm.”

The food soon arrives and the scent of steak hits my nose. I felt my stomach churns, feelingly utterly disgusted at the sight of food. When did I last ate? I force myself to ignore the smell while I continue to sip on my smoothie.

“Y/N, at least take a few bites. Please.” Jimin reaches over to my plate and begin cutting the steak up for me.

“…” Feeling strength less and pointless to fight back, I pick up one small piece of the meat and place it in my mouth. I felt queasy the moment I swallowed it and my fingers gripped onto the side of the table.

“You okay?” Jimin looked up from his food and look at me with caring eyes.

“Y-yea” Taking a deep breath to steady myself. “It just never occurred to me that there came a time we will be sitting down across each other having dinner and watching movie. It’s been a strange day for me.” Jimin blinked at me with wide eyes supposing couldn’t believe that I actually spoke more than a few words to him.

“Me too.” Jimin said while smiling gently at me. “Y/N, can we make a deal? For the rest of the dates.”

“Depends. What kind of deal?”

“Let’s not think about the past and enjoy the moment right now. I know the past have been a nightmare to you. Honestly speaking, not just to you, but also to me as well. I just want us to be normal like before. You don’t have to open up completely to me yet. Just… Even if it’s for the next few dates, let us be like before.” Jimin stare into my eyes, anticipating my reply.

“Yeah… Why not.” I replied while playing around with my food. I was secretly relieved as I honestly didn’t want to think or mention about our past. It will only cause me pain. I took the courage and look at Jimin face for longer than those past 1 second attempts.

“Why are you looking at me like that?” Jimin flash a fond smile at me. “Do I have something on my face?”

I smile back at him and shook my head. I think this is probably the first genuine smile I have gave him since the day we reunite. “It’s just… You still have those eyes. Still as amazing and mesmerise as ever.” My words came out naturally and I didn’t bother to filter it at all. Gosh Y/N... You didn’t just praise your enemy, did you? Pretending I didn’t just hear the voices in my head, I push it all behind. I have decided to just spend the rest of the day without listening to them.

I didn’t expect Jimin to be this happy to hear what I just said. His smile is so wide right now that his eyes formed a line. “I haven’t heard that in a while. I’m glad I did again. I remember you’re the first one beside my family to compliment me on them when I was young.” Taking a sip of his drink before continuing. “I hated the fact that my eyes were small and the tendency of them disappearing when I smile but you’re the one that manage to make me embrace them and came to love them eventually.”

“Mmhmm. I was angry at you when you said you hated them. I even screamed at you stating I would love to have your eyes.” I let out a slight laugh while recalling. Jimin beamed even more when he caught me doing so. “Yeah. I screamed back at you stating that we can swap if you want because I like yours better.” Pausing a little to shift his position, “I guess we were both so fixated with each other that we don’t see our own worth.”

“I guess.” I just shrugged it off. Deep down I know Jimin was right about that but I didn’t want to continue with the conversation based on that. Thank god Jimin noticed and didn’t continue with the previous conversation, instead he came out with something new.

“So… How’s life?” I noticed him looking anywhere else but me, seemingly afraid to mention or ask about my life. At this timing, more diners are flooding in and is getting noisier as time passes and it isn’t exactly to my liking.

“Jimin, can we take a stroll along the beach?”

“S-sure. Just let me take the bill quick. You can wait for me outside.”

By now, the sun had set and the stars were coming out one by one. For some reason, the moon was beautifully round and glowing brighter than ever. We were just walking side by side to nowhere. I took a deep breath letting the cool and crisp air into my lungs. “Sometimes I feel like I didn’t deserve to live but then again, I have to live on as they protected and gave up their lives for me.”

“Sorry?” Jimin looked at me surprised and I know he didn’t know what to say.

“Just saying. Sometimes don’t you feel like there are two universes? Or should I say, alternate universe? Like you tend to switch places with the other version of you but ended up not knowing how to handle situations as that version of you didn’t encounter the situation that you did in this universe. Ended up being lost. Am I making sense to you? Tell me if I’m not.”

Jimin look at me and nodded. “I get what you mean.”

“Really? You do?”

“Yea.”

“I’m so glad you do. And then it feels like being a fictional character in a story book. The writer had everything set up and story line prepared but then halfway through decide to change completely. Leaving the character with a new story and name. Having a completely new reality hits you out of a sudden.”

“I understand. Everything seems unreal and crazy sometimes. Just like the moment right now. I’m currently strolling with you at the beach but we probably weren’t here right now in the other universe. It feels surreal.”

I stop in my tracks and look up into the sky. “Probably. Hey, Jimin…”

“Yea?”

“Have you ever wonder where we would be right now if you didn’t leave back then?” I felt tears sprang to my eyes the moment the question left the tip of my tongue but I took in deep breath not willing to let myself cry. I can sense Jimin shoulder tensed up upon hearing the question. “Never mind. Forget that I ever asked. It was a slip of my tongue. I didn’t want to know the answer either. Probably not now.” I managed to turn and pull out my best current smile at Jimin. “Hey, do you think you can send me back right now? It’s been a long and strange day today. I would like to head back and collect all my thoughts.”

I was being completely truthful today. I wasn’t lying about any. I needed to make sense of what I am feeling. Staying any longer will just cause me even more plenty of thoughts. I’m already feeling bubbles of self-hatred at myself for even talking to Jimin normally. Even though I have been suppressing those voices in my head, I can still feel them screaming at me telling me I shouldn’t have said so much with him. But everything happened so fast that neither of us had time to think clearly about the next move.

“I’ll be glad to send you home.”

“Thanks for everything today Jimin. It was fun I guess.”

“Hey Y/N…”

“Yea?”

The next moment happened too fast before I can even grasp. Jimin span me into a tight hug, holding onto me gently seemingly as if I would vanish into thin air if he didn’t grab onto me right now. “Thanks for giving me this chance today to date you. I know it was against your will as I trick you into it but still, thank you. I really appreciate it. Lastly, I’ll always be here for you. I won’t ever go back on my words anymore.” I not sure of what to feel but I know it’s too late to turn back to how we were before knowing how broken I am.  Still… Maybe one last tries? I return Jimin his gesture and told him I needed more time.

Hello people. I'm so sorry for being MIA for so long. Was having idea blockage and it took me long enough to come up with this chapter. Kindly forgive me. ;___; Anyway... I did a video on Jimin and hope you guys enjoy it. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=THDiZIROCRk :)