180522 (I have adjusted the previous chapter slightly so as to avoid the abrupt ending that was driving me crazy, hence the repetition of the first few paragraphs in this chapter)

‘Are you going back with us?’ It is Chanyeol’s turn to ask questions, and ones that have the older girl frown.

‘Going back where?’

‘To my house, of course. As fun as gaying this party up was, we didn’t exactly drive all the way from York and risk our lives-‘

‘You’re the only one who’s gonna have his life put paid to,’ Seungwan grumbles, remembering Mr. Park’s heated voice, audible even as his son was standing some ten feet away.

‘-just to play at Junmyeon’s wedding. I hope he knows he didn’t deserve our performance in the slightest.’

‘I really don’t think it would be the best idea for me to leave right now. I’m almost certain that Sehun will, and I cannot risk this situation becoming even worse. If both of us abandon our parents like that, it will be a slap to the community.’

‘Bollocks,’ Chanyeol murmurs, clearly not liking the idea of leaving even one soldier behind. Seungwan links her fingers with Joohyun.

‘Can we at least come to the reception? For moral support?’ She knows there is no point arguing because Joohyun is always true to her word. Having made up her mind, hardly ever will she go back on her word.

‘You can try but I’m not sure if that wouldn’t be only further adding oil to the fire,’ Joohyun admits.

‘I promise we’ll behave completely straight,’ Chanyeol assures. ‘Look, I can even pretend that I’m attracted to Seungwan.’ The two friends look at each other for a brief moment before they look away with a scoff. ‘Ok, so maybe this level of acting is beyond my capacities but-‘

‘It’s fine,’ Joohyun interrupts them, chuckling. ‘My parents might know or be suspicious because of your friendship with Sehun, but the rest will never guess. In our community… in our community homouality doesn’t exist,’ she says in a low voice. ‘They will sooner suspect you of being eccentric. I’m mostly worried about what Junmyeon might do.’

‘What’s gonna happen to the newly-weds? Like, are they going back to school or-‘

‘No bloody chance in hell, Wan. Have you seen Kang? She could barely stand on her own two feet.’

‘Chanyeol is right,’ Joohyun cannot help but grimace at the boy’s choice of language. ‘Seulgi needs rest, more than ever. Her parents already decided that they’ll have her prepare for finals at home. She needs to at least finish school before they can think of university or getting jobs.’

‘Junmyeon?’

‘I am not sure,’ she admits. ‘Though I can’t image he’d want to leave her behind in this state – and even less return to our school at all.’

They decide to temporarily leave the car on the parking lot and walk to the house. The party is already in full swing, though the air of shame mixed with discomfort is easily felt but those privy to the context. But Junmyeon is putting his utmost effort into the role of a proud husband and he eventually does succeed in making his bride smile a little. He does love her, that much Joohyun has never doubted but as pure as the feeling is, it cannot really redeem his other acts, and especially not in the eyes of his new in-laws. Mr. Kang scowls at the boy the whole time, barely refraining himself from scoffing at the congratulations being conveyed his way; he does so more for the sake of his own reputation that even his daughter or the Bae family.

Sehun has somehow made it back before the group of three and is now perched against the cherry tree, observing the unfolding events with hardly concealed disgust. He did play his part in the wedding, after all, but certainly not willingly.

‘Where’s Yixing?’ Joohyun asks as soon as she is within his hearing range.

‘You should’ve told me he’s here.’ On the contrary to the statement, Sehun appears to be long past the matter, letting it go as soon as he voices it out. ‘And you, guys. What were you thinking?’ He frowns at the newcomers. ‘In front of my parents and all those guests?’

‘Saving your flat arse, that’s what I was doing,’ Chanyeol replies, making a point to send his roommate a sour look. ‘You’re welcome, by the way.’

‘Honestly, you mother even thanked us. Her expression wasn’t exactly one hundred percent positive but I guess like the majority, she was just glad you didn’t conk your dad all the way to the altar…’

'Anyway, I was just waiting for you. I'm getting out of here, no point dragging this charade out any longer.'

'Dude, why did you even come back here? You made this big buzz about wanting to stick it to your father but now you're just going to bail?' Not that Chanyeol approved of his roommate's bizarre plan in the first place but now it feels even more pointless and Seungwan cannot help but silently agree.

'You wouldn't understand,' Sehun only replies but the stubbornness in his voice suggests that he himself also fully does not.

'Where is Yixing?' Joohyun, too, notices the lack of direction that the argument is bound to take at this rate so she changes the topic, repeating the question.

'Waiting for me at the church. I'm going to grab my stuff and tell our parents you guys invited me for the rest of the holiday so yeah, that's another thing. You need to leave now to make my story credible.'

'You think your folks will just let you leave?' Chanyeol asks again, looking sceptical. The situation becomes more and more tense when it appears obvious that Sehun not only did not accomplish what he came here for in the first place but also plans to exit in a rather unorthodox fashion.

'I don't care,' comes another smart arse, if not defensive reply. It leaves them all lost for words. The boy does not need any more encouragement, having seemingly made his final statement and nodding at them once, makes his way towards the room upstairs. Joohyun sends her friends a hopeless look before asking them to Wait, please and following her brother dutifully.

'Sehun. Sehun, wait.' Her pleas fall on deaf ears as the boy pulls his duffel bag from under the bed, most of it ready as it is, or perhaps more accurately, having never been unpacked at all.

'Coming home was a bad idea,' he admits, stopping his actions but also not really looking at his sister. Tell me about it, she wants to snort at him but refrains. This is not the time to be condescending.

'You did well by not boycotting the wedding. Since you're already here, it's good that you did not make a scene.' She puts a hand on his shoulder. 'I know you want to leave and I'll do what I can to help you but you have to understand that-'

'I don't have to understand anything,' he cuts her short angrily, before reflecting on the pain inflicted and adds, 'Sorry.'

'It's okay.' She looks away.

'It's not ok. It's not ing okay at all. I can't even begin to tell you how not okay everything that is happening here is. It's been going on for years and I might still be too big of a wuss to confront it directly, but at least now I recognise it. Yixing helped me understand that I do not have to agree with everything that our father believes in - he doesn't know me at all, so why would his judgement be fair or accurate?' Once again, his words render his sister nearly speechless. 'I don't want to just endure it, but I have no strength to fight it so I need to leave. Perhaps I will never be able to come clean to this family but I think that's okay too. I don't owe anyone anything.'

When Joohyun does not react, Sehun re-focuses his attention on the remaining contents of his room, attempting to pack efficiently yet quickly. That is how their mother finds them.

'You're leaving with your friends..?' She observes in a voice much calmer than their father's surely would have been. Sehun only nods in her general direction, not even being able to come through with the short lie he has committed himself to and letting the woman believe what she wants to.

'Perhaps it's for the best,' she said again, still standing at the threshold unsurely. 'Your brother and his wife will live with us for a while, we can't have any more tension than we already have at the moment. Seulgi needs all the rest that she can get.'

Joohyun wants to argue, wants to say that this is not the way to send Sehun away, no matter the circumstances but she also recognises that their mother is simply conveying the message that their father felt unable to, probably due to their previous disagreement. It still makes the girl hopelessly enraged, once again seeing the shortcomings of an approach that allows one to forget their ties with their closest ones on the account of their misguided beliefs.

'When you leave, make sure to take care of him, will you.' It is the only demonstration of mercy and concern that is displayed among them as their mother nearly forcefully hands Joohyun a few notes of a bigger nominal, surprising her.

'We?' She can't help but ask.

'Aren't you leaving with Sehun..?'

'I-' Joohyun's voice fails her, unsure of what to say to that. Just moments ago she told her friends that she would stay home and try to pacify her parents who now apparently do not want her here at all. Her father's passive aggressiveness is one thing, but such open hostility, even conveyed in a cowardly way, visibly shocks her.

Even Sehun seems to comprehend the gravity of the statement for he once again stills, not really looking at the present party but intently listening in on their conversation.

'I didn't realise I wasn't welcome home anymore,' Joohyun eventually admits quietly, swallowing thickly. But maybe she should have known, seeing how her own father hardly bares to look at her these days.

Her mother sighs resigned, approaching her daughter and squeezing her hand in consolation.

'It's not like that, honey. It's- it's complicated. It's just better for the two of you to go back to school quietly and stay away while we deal with the matters at hand. We cannot afford to be supporting all of you the same way right now.'

'As if you ever supported all of us equally,' Sehun scowls, going back to his packing but not nearly quietly enough for his mother not to hear the remark. She obviously has much more patience for her daughter than for her youngest offspring for her words turn much harsher as she faces him.

'Don't you start with me, young man,' she nearly hisses, clearly bothered. 'The only reason why you are not on your way to our church's educational institution is because your father decided that we need to focus on Junmyeon first. Don't think for a second we did not see your lack of interest in the prayer and what you did with that delinquent behind the holy temple this morning.'

Sehun zips his bag with much more force that he would normally need and finally faces his mother, looking so much unlike himself that Joohyun thinks that she has perhaps judged his attitude too early.

'He is not a delinquent and I'd kiss him again in a heartbeat if I had to choose. You do what you and father feel that you have to, but just know that I'm not part of this anymore and I'm never going back to that place. You won't make me. If you cannot accept me as I am, better just kill me now. Less bloody hassle for you later.' His mother looks scandalised but says nothing at the outburst. He scoffs. 'That's what I thought. I'm taking my sister. Let's go,' he nods at Joohyun and passes them both, ascending the stairs.

Joohyun does not want to believe the situation still, looking to their mother to tell her that this is all just a big joke and that nothing has changed. That their gifts are waiting under the Christmas tree ready to unwrap. Better yet, that Joohyun is ten again and blissfully unaware that their version of God isn't as merciful and understanding as their church has made them believe.

But if that happened, the result would still be the same. Junmyeon and Seulgi would have committed their sin all the same and Sehun would have still fallen in love with Yixing Zhang right under their noses and in front of the altar. The only difference would be her staying behind like a fool, seeing her younger brother for what would probably be the last time.

She still has that choice to make.

She does not have the heart to look at her parent as she leaves the room. Not when she can almost taste the bitterness of her own disappointment on her tongue. She follows her brother downstairs and directs herself to where the two wedding crashers are still waiting, Seungwan fidgeting and Chanyeol inhaling what is probably his third piece of the lemon pie. Joohyun knows that there is no place for her in Yixing Zhang's house but maybe there will be in theirs.

'What's happened?' Seungwan is the first one to notice Joohyun's expression, grabbing her hand in silent support. The older takes a deep breath.

'Looks like my parents don't want me here with Junmyeon and Seulgi around. Sehun is going with Yixing, so- so maybe I could still accept your invitation after all?'

It is a relief to immediately feel Seungwan's arms around her and it is all the reassurance that Joohyun needs at the moment.

Joohyun thinks that she has already seen everything but Chanyeol Park's house and family are still a shock for her, in one way or another.

She packs her small bag, taking only what she originally brought from school - not accepting the fact that for her this too almost seems like the final visit at home. It is a scary thought that she would rather push aside for now. Nobody waves her good bye, nor are there kisses and wishes of safe journey. Sehun gives her a brief hug, still frowning at the fact that his big sister prefers to stay elsewhere but she feels it is for the best. Sehun wants to be close to his boyfriend. Joohyun... Well, Joohyun wants to stay close to Seungwan Son because it is the only place that does not seem so dark and daunting right now. She hands him half the money she has received from her mother and promises to call in the afternoon.

She does not see either Junmyeon or Seulgi before leaving, and it is probably for the best. His sister feels that Junmyeon's path is not the right one but under existing circumstances, it is the only right one for him. There is no more point trying to persuade or reason with him. He is better off under the welcoming wing of the community.

Chanyeol Park drives like a mad man, that is certain - but he and Seungwan still sing their lungs out the whole way back like their lives depend on it. Whether to only cheer Joohyun up or out of obnoxious habit, the older girl is all the same thankful for the distraction. It is hard not to laugh when the two attempt a rendition of every single song from The Ultimate Collection of Elton John that Chanyeol's father apparently does not set off without.

Seungwan teases the boy about knowing all the lyrics by heart and his ears only redden but he says nothing, continuing his excessive belting out.

Chanyeol's house is a typical one floor cottage, situated on a rather quiet street in a row of building of the exact same colour, shape and size. It is almost four o'clock in the afternoon when they arrive and the moment they park the car, a man of a rather small stature appears in the door looking alarmingly threatening. He does not approach them, as if waiting for the newcomers to make the first move and their driver sighs deeply, hands tightening on the steering wheel despite having killed off the engine.

'You think I could still escape through the front lawn..?' He mumbles, seemingly to no one in particular but Seungwan replies anyway.

'We both know you'd just trip over your own legs. Better just go out there and take it like a responsible human being. I promise I'll write to you every day when you're locked up.'

'Ah, bollocks. I didn't even bring back the person I went there for... You owe me, Wan,' he finally says, bravely stepping out of the car and nearly immediately meeting his father's wrath as he is being dragged away by the ear despite standing taller than his father by almost a head. Mr. Park does not create scene right there and then probably only out of courtesy to their guest whom he has seen peeking from the back seat.

'It was his own idea, anyway,' Seungwan shrugs before getting out of the car herself and Joohyun has no other option but to follow. They leave behind the two men still arguing in the corner of the front lawn and enter the house where greets them the smell of roasted beef that Yoora has decided to cook for afternoon tea. Mrs. Park appears on the corridor, probably acutely aware of the dispute going on right under her nose but seeming equally unbothered by it.

'Ah, Seungwan,' she calls out. 'We were just about to eat, Yoora and Matt have to leave soon. Is this your girlfriend, honey?'

Joohyun, who in nerves has linked her fingers with Seungwan's, nearly lets go at the statement. But gone are the times when she would be ashamed and disgusted at the assumption; now she just feels embarrassed at her own clinginess. The younger girl does release Joohyun's hand but only to put it around her shoulders instead, bringing her closer to the host.

'This is Joohyun,' she introduces only and a knowing, albeit a bit sad smile immediately graces Mrs. Park's features.

'Ah, Chanyeol's little boyfriend's sister, right?'

'For the last time, mum, Sehun is not and has never been my boyfriend.' Chanyeol enters the scene, looking like he has gone through hell and back. He puts down Joohyun's bag on the ground. 'In fact, he's smooching another church boy and that's kinda why we've ended up having only Joohyun for the holiday.'

'If it's not too much trouble...' Joohyun herself opens for the first time, her head mildly spinning at the speed the conversation is taking.

'Oh, no, not at all. It'll be a welcome change to have more girls around here. My daughter doesn't visit as often and when these two get together, all the talk about is music and .'

'We do not!' Both Chanyeol and Seungwan deny vehemently, whining embarrassed at the woman. Joohyun cannot help but chuckle at the display - Mrs. Park is obviously teasing them, and she does it effectively too.

'Now, whoever needs to freshen up, hurry up because we're sitting down to tea.'

Seungwan leads Joohyun away to wash their hands and that's when the older breaks the silence, no longer able to hold in the curiosity.

'That's Chanyeol's mother?' She asks when the other passes her soap.

'Yeah, why..? Oh.' Seungwan, long used to the Park household, takes a moment to process her friend's surprise. 'No, he's not mixed, the idiot's just adopted. That's why his mum's white.'

'So his sister..?'

'Same. Yoora's the coolest lass in the world, Chanyeol doesn't deserve her, especially with the way he always complains about her.'

Joohyun finds herself feeling unexpected discomfort at the idea that the younger perceives another girl as cool but soon realises just why exactly Seungwan said so - both her and Yoora take every opportunity to gang up on Chanyeol while he only spouts indignantly. Their parents and Yoora's husband only regard them with humour, laughing every once in a while. The dinner passes in a lively atmosphere.

Joohyun does not remember that kind of situation at her family table once in her entire life.

'Are you feeling alright, honey?' Mrs. Park, sitting on her right, asks quietly. Joohyun only nods, not quite certain how to explain the mixture of pain, sadness and numbness that is slowly enveloping her. 'How about we have you rest for the evening?'

Joohyun nods in thanks because that is probably the easiest considering the circumstances but the woman seems to know everything there is to know anyway.

Seungwan leads her to Yoora's old bedroom, lamenting how they cannot sleep in the same bedroom because Mrs. Park doesn't want their hormones get better of them at night, before getting red in the face and stammering, realising what she has just said - and to whom. Joohyun just smiles tiredly, her mind somewhere else.

She calls Sehun when Seungwan finally bids her good night (once again relishing in the hug and nearly having to force herself not to stay like that for another minute or two).

'We're arrived safely,' he says, waiting for her reaction.

'Chanyeol Park's parents are so nice,' the girl admits after a moment of silence. 'I didn't realise that families like his exist.'

'Yeah, imagine your parents taking interest in your needs and not condemning you to a lifetime of living in guilt just because you don't fit their idea of the perfect child,' he scoffs.

'But after his stunt with his father's car, he's still grounded and his allowance was cut.' They laugh at their friend, albeit in good faith.

Joohyun sighs.

'You meant what you said, didn't you. You're not going back home?'

'No. I don't think they'll make me either. Father is a coward, he couldn't even face us to kick us out personally.'

'He didn't-' She does not say anything more. She cannot deny the claim with confidence.

'Do you know what Junmyeon told Yixing this morning?'

'They saw each other?' It should not surprise the girl, considering that she saw the boy lingering around the church before the mass.

'Yeah, well. Junmyeon tried to punch him again but reflected since you know, wedding and all,' he sounds ironic again. 'He told him to just get me out of there once and for all - since he apparently loves me so much,' The sarcasm now turns bitter and Joohyun has a feeling that the words are a direct quotation. 'And to let them live in peace.'

'..I'm sorry.'

'I'm not. I'm ing done feeling sorry for myself. I'll say what I feel and I'll do what I have to do. I'll follow my instincts and I'll stop feeling remorse or regret.'

'Then I'll be here if you ever need me,' Joohyun says only, feeling better at her brother's resolve. She should take his advice.

'Thank you,' he replies and after a moment, adds, 'I love you, sis.'

Joohyun chokes up.

'Aren't you asleep? It's so cold, too.'

Joohyun's words seem to bring Seungwan back from her reverie as she mindlessly tunes the guitar in her hands. It is five am and the thought of being awake so early in the morning seems a little insane but the older just could not sleep and eventually decided to get a glass of water from the kitchen downstairs, not really expecting anyone there - let alone Seungwan Son, making noise on a borrowed guitar.

The voice startles the musician a little, but although sleepily, she quickly sends a newcomer a welcoming grin.

'I could say the same for you,' she observes and Joohyun shrugs, gingerly taking place next to her roommate, no longer caring to satisfy her thirst. Seungwan turns back to her instrument.

'My father woke me up.'

'Your father..?' Knowing what she does about the man's presence - or rather absence - in his daughter's life, Joohyun cannot help but feel alarmed.

'I guess he forgot the time difference. He called to wish me good holiday, though. That was nice, I suppose,' she shrugs but it comes out more conflicted than nonchalant, like Joohyun think it was meant to.

'It does sound nice of him,' Joohyun agrees cautiously, gauging her roommate's reaction. When there is none, she grasps for the only topic that she can think of that would dispel the awkwardness. 'I've made you a scarf.'

Seungwan's head shoots up, looking back at her companion.

'You what?'

'As a Christmas gift. I've made you a scarf.' She looks down unsurely when there is a prolonged moment of silence - the younger looks nearly shell shocked. 'I mean, I suppose it was my first time trying so it might not even look good-'

'You really made it for me?' Joohyun faces the other, feeling mild annoyance at having to repeat herself so many times but the sentiment lasts only a second. Seungwan Son looks like she has just been told that all her dreams came true and is simultaneously afraid to believe it.

Are those tears in her eyes?

'Of course,' Joohyun replies calmly. 'Didn't we agree that we would exchange gifts..?'

'I didn't- I didn't think you would take it seriously,' the singer admits, suddenly shy and clasping her own palms tightly for encouragement.

'I sure did. It took me nearly a three weeks to complete, but I think I'm beginning to like it, too,' Joohyun smiles lightly, thinking back to the new found hobby.

'Can I see it?' There is eagerness in Seungwan's voice that makes Joohyun chuckle.

'Right now? It's five thirty in the morning.´

'I don't care. Please. Boxing Day has passed anyway.'

Joohyun briefly considers the plea before agreeing and nodding once. She stands up and quickly walks up the narrow staircase, retrieving the object that she in fact barely remembered to pack in her haste to leave the house after being so unceremoniously ushered away. The scarf is fluffy and of a pleasant green colour - Joohyun has no hope of her friend sticking to one hair dye for a significant amount of time so she has chosen something that can hopefully go not only with fiery read and deep blue, but also with many future shades that she wishes to try.

Thick woollen fibres tied together by hand, the accessory does not seem anything extraordinary but Seungwan thinks otherwise. She nearly squeals when she puts her hands on the gift, quickly wrapping it around her neck loosely a couple times - it did turn out to be slightly longer than Joohyun predicted and she just, well, she did not initially know how to stop the production in an aesthetically pleasing manner.

'It's beautiful, I don't know what to say.'

'Say that you'll wear it from now on because it's really cold outside and I feel cold myself just at the sight of your bare head and open jacket.'

'Deal,' Seungwan concedes, blushing profusely. Joohyun cannot help but think it is terribly cute.

'What about me?'

'Huh?' Seungwan turns to look at the other girl who is now regarding her with a semblance of mischievousness.

'Didn't you say you'd write me a song..?'

'I-' The singer does not know what to say because she did not think that she would be taken seriously.

But she did, of course, prepare a song. In fact, she had written it more than a month ago, hit by a surge of inspiration late at night. Joohyun had been in her bed at that point, breathing slowly and deep asleep so Seungwan simply wrote down the chords, sounding the melody out in her head before checking it later the next day, this time for real. It was a bit bold, both in tune and lyrics, but the girl feels that it is the only way to express her feelings without really expressing them. Joohyun has never taken what Seungwan said as more than a joke so it would not be inaccurate to assume it would be similar.

'I did write it,' she admits reluctantly, reaching for her guitar. She clears awkwardly. 'I wrote something... I mean, you don't have to take it seriously, it's just a song. I just felt like writing it so-' Her voice wavers when she sees Joohyun sitting down closely, looking at her attentively - expectantly, even.

Seungwan clears again before pulling the strings a few times so as to warm up.

Every time we drew our lines

They grew legs and walked themselves down the road-

Seungwan stops hesitantly, throat contracting at the lyrics she honestly never thought she would sing out loud. She tries again, starting from the top and continuing,

Boundaries is my middle name

I can't respect where it's asked or it's shown

Her hands are sweating, her fingers nearly slipping on the instrument with nerves.

Something 'bout our exchange

It's a fight to act like you weren't in mind, oh mind

Joohyun is so still that Seungwan desperately wishes to just finish it already but she cannot really stop half way, now that she has agreed to sing it. But that lack of movement and quietness makes the younger think of the worst possible scenarios running through Joohyun's head. She finds me disgusting. Maybe she'll stand up and walk away without a word again. Maybe it was too much, it hasn't been that long since we became friends and now I'm pushing it.

And I wish I was sorry, damn I wish I was sorry

That I don't know how to stay away, stay away-

Voice fails Seungwan after that line, not able to utter even one more word of the intimate confession. Because it is, it is a confession of sorts for her but much different and much more sincere than all the other times that she joked around before. It feels wrong to burden Joohyun with the quiet song sung at five am on a snowy morning. Seungwan looks down at her hands still grasping the guitar, not really knowing how to embrace the situation. Suddenly she feels a palm covering her own and prompting her to stand up. She looks up, surprised.

Joohyun stands up, pulling Seungwan along so the younger needs to put away her instrument on the side. They look at each other for a longer moment.

It feels a little too intense - a little too much and too fast - but at the same time, Joohyun does not see any other way to cope with the overwhelming wave of longing that has bubbled in her chest for quite some time. Having Seungwan in front of her like that, the old familiar Seungwan that she has always known but maybe has actually got to know only now in these past few months that Joohyun herself opened her eyes to things that did not immediately concern her life or faith.

Seungwan still stands there, mere centimetres away, sporting a rather confused expression at the older girl's sudden sombreness. Joohyun grasps at the ends of the somewhat sloppily crafted scarf, not really putting any strength into pulling the singer forward but the latter understands anyway, for she takes two steps towards her roommate, still bewildered but also expectant.

I can't do this on my own, Joohyun thinks, feeling tears prickling in the corner of her eyes. She is frustrated and scared even as she looks into Seungwan's eyes. I don't understand. Please, God, please do something. Don't test me like that. I'm leaving this in Your hands so whether this is defeat or giving in to Your will, just give me a sign and I'll follow. I'm so tired. I'm-

She feels Seungwan's lips on her own and they move slightly, unsurely. Joohyun stands there, merely closing her eyes and tasting salt on her tongue - she did not even realise when the unwanted tear made it down her cheek. Joohyun still does not reciprocate - quite frankly, she does not know what to do at all - but she blindly reaches for the other's hands and squeezes them with all her might, hoping it will convey some kind of message. It does; Seungwan slips away from the touch and instead places her palms on Joohyun's face, delicately framing the mildly terrified, but all the same willing, features.

That must be the sign then, passes through Joohyun's head. Someone that adores me purely and unconditionally.

Instead of moving away like she has been taught to do her entire life, she presses harder and finally - finally - reciprocates the kiss. It's salty, it's Joohyun's tears and longing, and maybe Seungwan's surprise too but all the same tastes perfect.

Oh, if only you knew just how you taste…

A/N: I´m never spliting chapters ever again, it´s a pain. I hope you still liked this one though.

The song sung by Seungwan belongs to lovely singer Kehlani and it´s called Again.