After everything that happened yesterday, i really wasnt in the mood to go to the dinner. 
I kept looking at my phone to see if Junhoe messaged me, but every time i checked i was filled with disappointment.

My mind kept going back and forth with all that went down yesterday. 
From those Hanbin-obsessed panic attacks, to Junhoe saving me and then giving me the cold shoulder.

Thinking about it all only put me in a worse mood.
I climbed into bed and hid under the covers. 

My house was as empty as ever. Not that i expected it to be cheerful and bright, it's just..... i kinda missed the presence of having someone else in the house with me.

I looked at my phone once more and realized it was 9:30pm. I was already an hour and a half late to this dinner. I really didnt want to go, but i knew i had to.

These annual dinners were a huge deal for the company. Everyone that worked at the entertainment was expected to come, not just the stars and trainees but the people who work behind the scenes like managers, makeup artists and more.

I dragged myself out of bed and quickly figured out what i was going to wear. Without even looking at the dress i picked out, i quickly took my clothes off and switched into it.
I didnt bother doing my makeup, whatever i had from the morning will suffice. I had nothing to look forward to anyway, so no point in getting all dressed up for no reason. 

Let's just get this over with. 
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"thank you" i bowed to the taxi driver before i entered the restaurant.

One of the waiters led me to the room that was booked for the YG party. As the door opened and i entered, everyone was laughing, screaming and having a good time. 
Big Bang, 2NE1 and Winner were all sitting on their own assigned tables, my eyes darted around the room to find IKON's table.

"Jen! Over here!" Jinhwan was waving at me from the far end of the room. Before walking over, i examined the table and noticed Junhoe sitting somewhat isolated from the rest of the members. He was holding a half empty glass of soju. My eyes then darted over to Hayi who was joking around with Bobby as she poured herself another glass of soju as well.

"do you plan on just looking from afar or actually sitting with everyone?" I felt a familiar hand press against my back. I looked up to see who it belonged to.

"h-hanbin..." He looked at me with a distant smile 

"im glad you're feeling better. Why dont we go sit with everyone else" He pressed his hand against my back with more force so that i'd start to move forward. It was awkward to casually talk to him, but his familiar touch somewhat comforted me. 

Jinhwan pulled me down so i'd sit beside him as Hanbin pulled a chair out next to me. 
Both Junhoe and hayi darted their vision towards us two, secretly judging the situation.

"i heard you had one of your panic attacks again yesterday, you feeling alright now?" Jinhwan asked as he crossed his arms on the table while looking at me

I kinda wished he didnt bring that up again, since i knew Junhoe could listen from where he was sitting.

I scratched my head as i tried to rub the conversation off with my lame answer, "oh im fine, it wasnt that big of a deal" 

I laughed awkwardly and looked over to Junhoe who poured himself some more soju and drank from his glass.

Hayi was now looking at me too, she let out a light laugh that only i caught on to. I'm guessing she thought i had my panic attack on purpose so that Hanbin would sit beside me lol (just thinking about it sounded stupid enough).

Besides, i made sure to sit on the edge of my seat, farthest away from Hanbin, so that i'd be closer to Jinhwan and no one would think anything of it.

After an hour of conversation with Bobby and Jinhwan, i started to feel even worse about how Junhoe was ignoring me. He was iso