Hey, guys!! I still have no excuse for the late update, except for the fact that I was stuck. I had it all made up in my mind and was halfway through writing, but I couldn't write down the other half and nothing would come out.  I'm not sure how this Chap is gonna come off, like..I have no idea, really, so I apologize in advance for anything you may not like. Plus, this is not beta-ed or edited (Jacks is still on vacay and I'm drowned, again...sorry).   Jacks is back!! which means that she took a look at this chap and did her magic, thx!!^^

:} Anyways, I hope you still enjoy and don't stop reading halfway through xD

Life was good. Life was actually great. That was what Taehyung would say when asked. That was what he told his doctor when he’d asked him at his last session. It was also what he’d managed to convince himself. It’s not like it wasn’t; it should be, he had no reason not to feel great, but he still didn’t.

In moments when he was sitting alone in his study or the confines of his bedroom, his thoughts would end up lurking to places he wished he could forget. There was a series of things the model wished he could forget and China was one of these things.

He’d thought that he had it all together, that he’d managed to get a grip on himself, but one week in China proved the opposite; he had been lying to himself that he was fine and that he could handle his .  He had manipulated himself so well that he’d even agreed to marry Jungkook to prove to himself and his parents that he was capable of being responsible so that they would let him travel alone after he graduated. 

Jungkook had been his ticket to getting his freedom and he’d held onto the younger as much as he could in the hopes of succeeding. Holding onto Jungkook, however, proved to be harder than he’d thought. In the beginning, he had not thought much of it; it was a challenge, a mission he’d have to go through for himself, but after spending so much time with Jungkook he realized that it was no longer a challenge or a mission.

But now, it has become a habit; Taehyung has gotten accustomed to having Jungkook around him, again, that it bothered him. He didn’t like the fact that the first person that crossed his mind when he woke up was Jungkook or that whenever he saw something funny; he wanted to share it with the younger male. He also didn’t like the fact that his body would act on its own accord and reach out to Jungkook without his consent. What also bothered him were the warm fuzzy feelings he’d get whenever Jungkook was in the room or looking at him.

This was bad. This was very bad.

Taehyung was not dense, he knew exactly what all of these feelings meant, - he has enough experience not to be that ignorant, but he didn’t want to give him in; although, he probably subconsciously already did – if his current actions towards Jungkook were not an indication enough.

As cliché as it might sound, he’d tried to distance himself from the latter. But Jungkook was so warm and familiar. Jungkook felt like a warm blanket on a chilly night and only Lord knew how many of those nights Taehyung has had over the years, but being around Jungkook made everything easy.

The younger male looked at him as a whole, as a person, not an image of someone, not the white-washed model in magazines, but he looked at Taehyung as an equal. He didn’t judge nor make fun of him, although he had all the resources to do so. But most importantly, he didn’t treat Taehyung like glass, like he was some loose cannon, - given he had been cautious around him after the model had been released from the hospital, but that was to be expected.

Jungkook was nice to him, so nice and caring that sometimes Taehyung forgot that the two have been ‘disliking’ each other all these years. Taehyung doubted the younger male even realized his own actions towards the model. Jungkook was naturally a caring person, even when they were younger, he had been the one who had pulled funny faces and made silly jokes to make Taehyung laugh when the elder was grumpy or was just upset over something that had happened at home or during work.

Mostly it had been over something the young model had heard about himself in the media or something about his mother; that she was unashamedly using her own children to make money. Or that Taehyung’s skin wasn’t fair enough for him to be a model and at times, he’d get scolded by the photographers for smiling too widely.
Other times, it had not the adults that had upset him, but the other kids he’d been working with; they’d about his smile, that he did not smile like someone who could be featured in a magazine or told him that he didn’t deserve to be part of the photoshoot because his parents had probably paid money for it.  Not all of them had been bad; some had been nice to him, but only because they’d wanted something from him. 

Taehyung never complained to his mother about them. He’d figured from a young age that that was how people were, but it still didn’t mean that it didn’t hurt.

During those moments, Jungkook would go out of his way to make sure that Taehyung was no longer upset. He’d let Taehyung rant as much as the latter wanted and when he was done he’d ask him if he should teach those people a lesson for messing with ‘them’.
Jungkook had always said ‘them’ not ‘you’ and it had given Taehyung the confidence he needed to carry on because he knew that whatever anyone said to him or about him and his family, he still had one person beside him.
It was ironic how after all these years of meeting different people and building a wide range of friendships, Jungkook has still managed to be the one person Taehyung wanted to turn to for comfort; the one person he felt would understand him the most.

And this was the problem. 

Turning to Jungkook for comfort would make him dependent onto the younger male and he didn’t want to depend on anyone, - Taehyung had learned the hard way what depending on people could cause you.

He was stuck. 

A part of him wanted to keep that small gap between him and the young heir and make sure it doesn’t get smaller than it already was whereas the other part of him wanted to be a small child again and whine to Jungkook about everything that has gone wrong over the years. He wanted to play secret agents with Jungkook, again and pretend that all the negativity was the bad guys and the two of them were on a mission to eliminate the ‘bad guys’ before it was too late.

+
 

“I can’t believe I’m seeing you without your bodyguard.” 

Taehyung frowned at his Hyung. “What do you mean?” he questioned, raising his head from his phone to look at the dancer through the mirror.

They were currently in one of the dance studios at HOMELY, Taehyung had gone over to talk to his mother about the possibility of ending his hiatus- it has been a month now and he feels agitated doing nothing other than school work. His mother, of course, has been avoiding their talk, but Taehyung was persistent and he was going to talk to her one soon or later. That's why he had decided to visit his Hyung and wait for his mother’s meeting to end.

“I don’t see Jungkook around you, where is he?” Hoseok asked nonchalantly, stretching his arms over his head. He was preparing himself for an obviously tiring dance routine that Taehyung was obviously not going to stay to watch because even the thought of it gave him goosebumps.

“He has a life," he deadpanned.

The dancer snickered. “I didn’t say he didn’t. I was just wondering where he was because I’ve only been seeing him with you.” He explained, still focused on his stretching.

Taehyung pressed his lips together, eyes narrowing as he watched the dancer.

“He’s been released from his duty,” he answered curtly.

“I doubt that it was a duty to him. The kid adores you,” the dancer told him, voice more serious than he probably intended.

Taehyung sighed. “So, I’ve heard.” 

Due to the model’s hiatus and non-appearances at events, it hadn’t been easy for the media to find something gossip worthy of publishing. That, of course, hadn’t stopped them from looking for something and according to Dispatch and other media outlets, the model and the heir to Jeon corporations were in a close relationship;
Some speculated that they were just being close friends since they’d practically grown up together; they’d even released old childhood pictures of the two as ‘proof’. Others assumed that they were dating; they’d also released pictures of them standing close or Taehyung hugging Jungkook from the side or him nuzzling his head into the younger’s hair. They even went as far as claiming one of the model’s rings to being a couple set with Jungkook’s earrings.

Wherever he or Jungkook would go, there was always a small number of paparazzi or fans who would take pictures and post them online. That was also how many of their outings ended up online with people cooing of how cute and innocent their dates were, some wishing they could go on a date with either of them. Of course, there were those who still lived in caves and with prejudices and didn’t attempt to hold back in posting something mean about their supposed relationship or insulting anyone who opposed them, but Taehyung had gotten used to that as well.

Growing up under the spotlight all his life, he’d become immune to people like that. It was Jungkook he was worried about. Although the younger male had also grown up in the spotlight, he hadn’t had as many scandals- if any at all, as Taehyung has had and if he did, then he’s sure that the latter’s mother had dealt with it before it got issued.
Taehyung assumed that his parents probably did the same thing because none of the rowdy things he’s ever done have ever ended up in the media. 

China would be an example. The incident in China was enough to end up on the news, but his name had not been mentioned and although he knew that it won’t, he still got anxious, almost to the point of getting anxiety, when someone asked him about his trip there.

“I know it’s hard for you, but it may not be bad to let him in.” Hoseok had been watching him through the mirror this whole time. 

Taehyung ran a hand in his bangs, tilting his head back to lean on the wall as he stared up at the mirrored ceiling.               “I could really hurt him, Hobbie-Hyung,” he said after a while.

The dancer nodded. “I know, but I’m sure he also knows this and he’s probably willing to take the risk. He’s coming at you half way; all you need to do is walk the other half mile.” 

Taehyung looked at the dancer, face a grimace. “I know you and Namjoon-Hyung have been spending a lot of time together, but please stop sounding like him.”

Hoseok chuckled and resumed his stretching.