Here it is the moment you've all been waiting for ing love and worship me

"So, unnie~" Jungah said quietly. "It's okay if I steal Yoongi oppa from you, right?"

Junghwa held her breath as she looked at her sixteen year old sister, and was almost about to say no, but then again, she was in no position to tell her sister what to do and what not to do.

But to ask Yoongi out-? Junghwa’s chest hurt at the mere thought of Yoongi and her sister together, and in that moment, it was so impossible to breathe that she thought she might faint. Why was this affecting her so much?

Her mind was racing with thoughts, all memories being recollected at the same time. Ever since Yoongi had heard of her plight, he had even gone out of his own way to make her happy, when she full well knew he had been fighting an inner conflict for the third year running. And no one that wasn’t family hadn’t gone to such extents to make her feel even the slightest ounce of happiness. Her head began to hurt as she remembered all that he had done for her, and the startling reality chose to come crashing down on her at that moment.

She liked Yoongi.

It was something she had come to terms with, sometime she had been trying to deny for so long. But… with this bombshell, she found it hard to deny her own feelings.

She liked him so much it hurt to not be able to have him.

Junghwa looked back up at Jungah, who was looking at her attentively; her eyes lit up the way they would when she was ‘in love’, her expression hopeful and somewhat, pleading. It was very obvious that her sister too, liked him.

They both fell for the same guy?

Letting out a defeated sigh, she shook her head. "He wasn't mine for you to steal anyway..." Junghwa mumbled, to which Jungah jumped up and down with glee, grinning broadly. "So you don't have a thing for him. I knew it! It was all just really friendly gestures on his side, I was worried he might actually like you, unnie.”

Jungah laughed, the words hurting Junghwa more than she should have allowed them to. Junghwa bit her lip as her sister dashed out of her bedroom, thinking about what she has just said.

Friendly gestures? But for Junghwa, it felt like she was the most important, if not the only person in the world when he was by her side. It hurt to think that it was normal of Yoongi to care for her. Which, perhaps it was, given her situation, but she felt like he only cared about her... some stupid fantasy she had imagined for herself.

"Hey, Hwa?" Jungho peeked through the door, before he chose to walk in. Jungkook followed him right after, the two men giving their sister surprised looks as she glanced up at them with a forlorn expression.

"Hey, oppa. Hey, Kookie." She said glumly, as they sat down on the bed.
"I heard Jungah say something about confessing her love to Yoongi..." Jungho asked cautiously, to which he received a scoff.

"Yeah, bet she told you all about that now, huh?" Junghwa wanted to snap, but she was just so distraught with the whole situation with Yoongi, and now this… had rendered her incapable of expressing her anger, as she looked at them painfully.

"You can't let her do this." Jungkook said quietly. "She's always been doing this. Going after the guys you liked, and it always hurts you every time, Junghwa."
"What makes you I like Yoongi?" She looked at Jungkook curiously. "I'm not, I'm just pissed cause Jung's so impulsive about it, she never thinks it through-"

Jungho sat next to Junghwa, putting his arm around her shoulder. She looked at him, furiously trying to hold up her strong front under his calm gaze.

“Junghwa, let’s start from the beginning.” He began. “Tell us how you’re feeling.”
“There’s nothing to talk about, oppa-”
“Hey. Stop it. Your face says it all, Hwa.” Jungho said softly. “And Jungkook’s been kind enough to let me know that your mood’s been going to again.”

Junghwa let out a resigned sigh, hugging her pillow tightly as she leaned against him. “Things have been difficult between me and Yoongi lately, as you might know…”
“Keep going.” Jungho nodded, reassuringly squeezing her arm. “You can be open, honest- we won’t judge.”

Junghwa bit her lip, slowly beginning to shake. It was then that she realised that this was affecting her so much, but she bottled up the torturous feelings, allowing them to build up, and now-

“It . I hate this. Everything .” Junghwa stifled a sob, looking at Jungkook tearfully. Jungho sighed, both his arms around her as he enveloped her into a tight hug, hoping to give her the strength to continue. “We kissed. Twice. But each time we did, he draws himself away from me, saying that we should put this behind us, and forget it happened.”

“But I can’t forget, you know? Not especially when I like him myself. Every time I got my hopes up, he just puts them to . And it’s affecting me so much, I hate it.” Junghwa looked at Jungkook, who had been silent the entire time. She groaned again, fiercely wiping her tears away. “I know I like him, but the way he’s acting… it makes me feel like I don’t deserve one bit of him. After he’s been so open to me and what not, after being so supportive, this feels like a slap on the face.”

Jungkook sighed, taking his sister’s hands into his. Junghwa looked at him bewilderedly, opening to speak up, but Jungkook shook his head, making her bite back whatever she had to say.

“I need you to listen to what I have to say first.” He said quietly. “Yoongi’s impulsive, and can sometimes not think through what he does. If he’s done this twice… kiss you, I mean… it was probably an impulsive decision and not something he had been planning to do. If you think he’s playing you, that’s something I know he’s incapable of.”
“And even I can tell that Yoongi treasures you a lot, Junghwa.” Jungho spoke up. “I know that he wouldn’t be messing around with your feelings like that.”

Junghwa was still unconvinced. “I don’t know what’s going on in his mind… but he’s hurting me.”

Jungkook looked at her with a wistful smile. “How do you know he isn’t hurting himself by denying what he wants, Hwa?”

That was something she hadn’t considered, as she frowned at Jungkook’s words.

“Remember when he waited for you out in the cold, Hwa?” Junghwa nodded. “Well the following morning, all of us were trying to get him to admit whatever feelings he might have had for you. But… I’m not sure how the wording went, but he said that he would never be good enough for you.”

Junghwa blinked, before she hissed again, groaning into her hands. “If he really does like me, he’s just like me. We’re both hurting each other and ourselves.”
“Nothing is sure at this point, Hwa.” Jungho interjected. “We don’t know what’s going on in his mind, he doesn’t know what’s going on in your mind… which is why you need to speak to him.”
“Wow, that’ll be quite the conversation after days of not speaking to each other.” Junghwa muttered sarcastically, looking away. “Oh, hi, Yoongi, I was wondering, you’ve kissed me twice and pushed me away each time. Tell me, what the is up with that?”

Jungkook shook his head, smiling disbelievingly. “Of course, we trust you to ease your way into it somehow.”

Junghwa smiled sadly, before another thought crossed her mind.

“Jungah…” She murmured uncertainly, realising that her sister too had feelings for the same man. Jungho immediately shook his head, whispering, “No. I won’t let that happen.”
“No, you’re not going to pull off some stupid , oppa-” Junghwa began, but Jungkook scoffed, shaking his head. “It won’t happen anyway.”

He stood up, his voice bearing confidence. “Don’t consider her a threat, Yoongi does not like her for sure, at least, not like he likes you.”
“Oh, now you’re confident he likes me?” His sister looked up at him incredulously, and Jungkook laughed, standing up.

“Who said I wasn’t?” Jungkook grinned, walking to the door. Turning back, he looked at her more seriously, murmuring, “Talk with him, please.”

As Jungkook walked out of the room, Jungho looked down at his sister. “I’ll just be real and not entirely agree with Jungkook on that one. But Hwa, he’s right. You should really talk to Yoongi. Sort things out."

Junghwa sighed, before nodding slowly. "I know. And I will."

-----

He had come here to think again. Yoongi looked up at the blue sky, a sigh leaving his lips as the sun bathed him, warm against his skin that was cold from the winter wind. Two hearts were broken that day, as he played with his sleeves.

First, Jungah. She had come to him, somehow she had known that he was here. All of a sudden, words tumbled from , a mix of almost incomprehensible sentences, but it was not hard to understand what she had wanted to say. I like you.

He winced as he remembered what happened after. Of course, Yoongi knew where his heart was. And it definitely wasn’t with the sixteen-year-old girl who had bared her heart for him hoping he would accept it. He had to tell her he didn’t share these feelings. That he did not see her as a romantic interest. Jungah was hurt, of course. But she kept a strong face, smiling bitterly as she apologised for taking up his time. Yoongi tried to console her but she was gone before he could utter a single word.

The second heart that was broken was his own.

And it had been constantly shattering for the last many days, with the weight of a problem. One that had been going on for far too long.

Junghwa.

He needed to sort things out with her. Hoseok was right, it was becoming increasingly difficult for him to fix things, the longer he put it off. The longer he put it off, the more awkward it got, the more they were beginning to distance. He wanted to ask her how she was, he wanted to know what new music she had discovered, he wanted to be able to talk freely with her, without a concern in the world.

But he also wanted to be able to hold her when she was sad, kiss her fears and worries, be able to tell her how much he loved her- Yoongi stopped his thoughts. He had no idea when it had happened, but he was now so sure that he was in love with Jeon Junghwa. And he had to fix things.

Even if she would not accept his feelings, he was determined, more than ever, to get his best friend back. No matter what, or how, he would fix the rift between him and Junghwa.

-----

Though she was playing with her sister, Junghwa had a lot on her mind. Junghwa and Junghee were going to go shopping for the house, to buy some food and presents for Christmas-

Jungah would bring Yoongi along…

But wait, they barely knew each other. Surely, Yoongi wouldn't be daft enough to date someone he barely knew? Of course they wouldn’t date.

That’s just what you want, Junghwa.

She shook her head, looking at her sister playfully toss her jumpers around. Yoongi and Jungah? No way. Her brothers were right. That wasn’t going to happen.

But then again… Jungah was really pretty. And funny, and just great to be around with. Who wouldn't want to go out with Jung? Even Yoongi could be smitten by her.

He probably likes you, Junghwa. Why else would he kiss you twice?

He’s probably just playing with you, you know. Denying himself what he wants? Bull.

After filling her head with these negative thoughts, she suddenly didn't want to have any part in their family meal on the following day. Having to see Jungah and Yoongi together would be horrible. Even the mere thought of them together was having her on edge.

Why is this affecting me so much?

"Unnie, you okay?" Junghee asked quietly, tugging at the sleeve of Junghwa's coat. Junghwa looked at her sister's concerned expression and slowly smiled.

"Yeah, of course." She grinned forcefully. "Don't you worry."

Junghwa zipped up Junghee’s coat, her preoccupied self oblivious to the drama that was going outside Jungkook’s room, where they both were. She briefly heard the slam of a door, but did not pay much mind to it, pulling socks on Junghee's small feet.

After making sure that her sister was just as warm as she was herself, she playfully pinched her sister’s nose, making her giggle. “Ready to go, Jeejee?”

Junghwa stood up, allowing Junghee to reach up and hold her hand, something she had loved to do. The both of them stepped out of the room, only to see Jungho pace around nervously. Junghwa looked at him suspiciously, wondering just what exactly what made her brother so fidgety.

“Oppa? You okay?” She looked at him, her brows knitted together with confusion. Jungho blinked, snapping out of his reverie as he looked up at Junghwa. He slowly smiled. before shaking his head as he said, “Yeah, I’m okay. You folks ready to go?”
“Um, yeah, we are-”
“Great, I’ll walk you to the door!” Jungho chuckled nervously, and Junghwa raised a brow at him, finding his behaviour very fishy. However, seeing her sister fidget made her decide that getting the shopping done was their priority, and she rolled her eyes at Jungho.

“Jeon Jungho, I am perfectly capable of walking myself to the door.” Junghwa shook her head, as she walked to the front door with Junghee in tow.

“I’m aware, little one. However, I just want to see my sisters off while they go off to shop for the household.” Jungho snickered as the two girls walked out the front door. Junghwa looked back at her brother, shaking her head slowly. “Don’t call me little one, you-”
“Hey, it's Yoongi oppa!” Junghee suddenly squealed, excitedly pointing towards the tall figure that was standing outside his apartment door.

The mop of mint green hair turned towards the source of the noise, blinking with bewilderment. Junghwa immediately felt her cheeks go red as her eyes met with his. Yoongi glanced at her, also turning red as they looked at each other for the first time in what seemed like forever.

Jungho noticed the tension between them, realising the situation was probably more diffcult to come about than him and Jungkook had thought it to be.

Junghee ran up to him, laughing amiably as she shouted "Oppa~!", while holding her arms out towards him. Recovering from the shock first, Yoongi laughed, bending over to lift the young girl off her feet.

"Hello, princess." He cooed, pinching her nose playfully. "How are you today?"
"I'm always fine, oppa!" Junghee laughed. "Me and unnie are going shopping for tomorrow's Christmas dinner!"
"That sounds nice!" He grinned as he put her down. "Well, my princess, have fun shopping."
"Oppa, we all know your princess is Junghwa unnie!" Junghee giggled.
"Junghee-" Junghwa flustered out as she turned a bright shade of red. Yoongi let out a chuckle, before he knelt down in front of Junghee.

"Well, I'm not so sure she wants me to be her prince..." Yoongi whispered into her ears. Junghwa had heard it, however, and now was thoroughly confused as to what the he actually wanted.

Do you like me too, Min Yoongi, or is this just my heart wanting you so much?

"Don't worry, Junghee... Once I find my princess, I'll be sure to tell you." He pinched her cheek, making her giggle.

"Junghwa." Jungho finally walked out of the apartment, making his presence known. He locked the door behind him, and Junghwa was surprised to see him wearing a jacket and a scarf around his neck.

"Hello, hyung." Yoongi stood up, smiling politely. Jungho looked at the both of them, and slowly grinned.

"Junghee, how about you and I go shopping instead?" Jungho smirked. "Let unnie talk to Prince Charming in private, okay?"
"Okay!" Junghee grinned at him. "Sorry, unnie!"

Junghwa looked at her brother in panic, but he showed no signs of backing down. "If you finish soon, we can meet up later." Jungho said quietly, so that only Junghwa could hear. "Clear your up with Yoongi."
"Yeah-"
"And tell him. You still might stand a chance." Jungho whispered, smiling sadly. "Jungah came back crying and hasn't come out of her room since."
"What-?!" Junghwa looked back at the door in alarm. Was that why Jungho was so edgy earlier? She wanted to go and check on her, Junghwa's sister instincts kicking in but Jungho shook his head.

"Let Kookie handle it. Come on, princess, let's go." Jungho grinned at Junghee as he lead her to the other end of the hallway. As they walked past Yoongi, Jungho put his hand on the latter's shoulder, and slowly nodded at him. "Fix everything." He said quietly, and walked off, leaving a surprised Yoongi in his wake.

Soon, the two flustered adults were left to their own. By now, Junghwa was wishing that the ground would just swallow her up because this conversation? She did not want to have it. Not right now.

Seeing that she was unable to keep herself composed, Yoongi realised that he would have to be the one to do this.

“We need to talk.” He began. “And fix things.”
“Yes, please.” Junghwa found her voice, grateful for him to have taken initiative. She followed him back to his place, which wasn’t far off, of course. The atmosphere was painfully awkward throughout, though it did show signs of lessening with the occasional smiles they shared.

Placing her coat on the hooks behind his front door, Junghwa followed Yoongi to the kitchen, her heart beating ungraciously faster with each step she took, and by the time they did walk inside, it was all she had to do in her power to stop herself from breaking out into a full scale panic attack.

“Do you want anything? Water, juice, coffee…” Yoongi began, nervously tugging at his black turtleneck; surprisingly, he was pulling off the look quite nicely, with a pair of blue jeans to go, and she was bit shocked to see how ripped up they were.

Doesn’t he feel cold? Junghwa mused, before her eyes met his again. He wasn’t smiling, but he wasn’t cross either. Yoongi’s face had been set into that expression he always had, when he wasn’t feeling anything in particular. But, she could see a shred of emotion in his eyes, and that was all she needed to take a step forward, closer to him.

She wanted to see his smile again.

Much to his surprise, her arms went around him, as she held herself close to him, her head resting against his chest. She could feel him become stiff in her embrace, which only compelled her to hug him even tighter. Yoongi slowly returned the gesture, a shaky sigh leaving him as his hand rested on top of her head.

“When you first kissed me, I… I felt really happy, you know?” She whispered. “I don’t know, but it started something, and had my hopes up. But you said that we should put it behind us. I agreed, but my heart didn’t want to.”

She could feel him tense, and sense that he was trying to withdraw himself once more. But, this time, she wouldn’t let him.

“The second time, I was even more hurt, even more confused. I felt like I wasn’t wanted, like I didn’t deserve to have you. I was so angry at you, and also at myself for not letting my unhappiness known to you. But, I accepted your withdrawal without a word, but it was torture.”

Yoongi sighed again, holding her closer. “The only reason I kept withdrawing myself from you was because I felt like I didn’t deserve you. I feel like a bad person, Junghwa. I felt like eventually, I would be causing you so much pain that I could not fix myself. I’m scared of what would have happened of the day came.”

“After Gayeon, Hwa… I've been too scared to fall in love again. I don't know why. But I carried the pain, the sadness for three years and I've been hurting myself with these thoughts. And you came along. You saved me, Hwa. You really… you’re really something, you know?”

Yoongi let out a breathy chuckle as his fingers ran through her hair as he spoke, the ice melting away with those words and the gesture. Junghwa nuzzled her face into the crook of his neck, and Yoongi held her tight, so tight and she knew that he wouldn’t let go this time. They stayed silent for a while, Yoongi rocking her back and forth, something that was once so familiar but then turned alien. The feeling was coming back to their bones, as they held each other and felt the comfort seep through their skin.

“But I never felt like I'd be good enough for you.” Yoongi’s voice bore pain, his words heavy and piercing Junghwa’s heart, because she did not want him to think like this about himself.

“I knew I'd never be able to save you the same way you did me. I just didn’t want to hurt you in the long run. I didn’t want you to be in pain because of something I did, or something I didn’t do.”
“Yoongi, no…” Junghwa shook her head, holding herself closer, hiding her face in his chest so that he would not see her cry, but he lifted her face, his sad smile breaking completely as he saw the stray tears going down her cheeks.

With shaking hands, his thumbs carefully wiped her cheeks, another broken smile adorning his lips. “Don’t cry… it doesn’t suit you.”
“Y-You too-” Junghwa scoffed, noting the way Yoongi’s eyes had begun to water. “It doesn’t suit-”

Yoongi held her to him, hiding his face in her shoulder; he was shaking, fear or sorrow consuming him and Junghwa could only weakly comfort him, before bursting into tears.

“… I didn’t know how much I was hurting you and myself because of this. I don’t know how I’ll make it right- , Yoongi, stop crying, you big baby-” Yoongi sobbed, days worth of frustration, longing and sadness all bursting at the seams, unable to be contained any longer. “I’m sorry, Hwa, I’m so sorry-”

They sunk to the floor, Junghwa rubbing his back to calm him down. Her own cries were ceasing to fade, and Yoongi took a bit longer, but finally he was calm enough to speak again.

“I don’t know how many times I’ll have to apologise to make this right, but I’ll do it as many times I’ll have to.”
“Sh, Yoongi. It’s okay. We’re okay.” Junghwa looked at him with a small smile. “We’re okay.”
“We-we’re okay.” Yoongi nodded, speaking more to himself first before looking at Junghwa, wiping his eyes with the sleeve of his jumper. “We’re okay.”
“Mm, we are.” Junghwa had smiled to herself as Yoongi rested his forehead against her shoulder, letting out a small sigh. Her fingers played with green hair, as she whispered, “Listen… I’m sure Gayeon wants you to be happy no matter what. Whether that happiness is with me or someone else, she would want you to be happy. It’s not your fault, Yoon… it’s not.”

Yoongi nodded, relaxing into her arms, his head moving to meet her fingers fully. Junghwa chuckled, as she suddenly hugged his neck, giggling a little.

“I missed you, Yoongi.” She said softly. “I missed you so much.”
“Mm. I missed you too, Junghwa.” Yoongi looked up, his eyes bright and a wide smile on his face. Perhaps for the first time in a while, he didn’t look burdened as if he had several existential crises. He was just… Yoongi. And Junghwa loved it.

The two later found themselves on Yoongi’s bed, talking on and on as if they’d never be able to. Yoongi on his back and Junghwa on top, the position new yet somehow comforting all the same. His fingers lightly brushed across the exposed skin of her back, and hers tracing his jawline up and down, but they were so engrossed in the conversation that they did not pay much attention to their actions.

They slowly did grow conscious to the touch, though, as their eyes met and they just stared at each other, all the while thinking how could the person in front of them be so beautiful?

Yoongi’s heart thundered. His throat went dry as he realised, with full certainty, that he was in love with Junghwa. Here she was, literally in his arms, and all he had to do was take the plunge and let the rest of the magic unfold.

Her eyes were so beautiful, looking down at him almost innocently, waiting for his move.

But he was scared, telling himself he didn’t need to be, but he was scared and he just wanted to kiss her right now, but wasn’t that too impulsive? It wasn’t right, was it?

Junghwa noticed his discomfort, and slowly smiled. “The heart wants what it wants, Yoongi. I know what mine wants, and I think it’s the same as yours.”

Yoongi tugged her down, their lips meeting and his eyes closed, half because he wanted to savour the moment and half because he was scared to see her reaction to his action.

“Yoongi, I’m a bit rusty…” Junghwa murmured, her voice hesitant, her cheeks flushed slightly. “Just go slow.”

Yoongi nodded, his lips gently nibbling hers between their kiss as relief flooded him and he could calm himself down with that. With words and actions, he guided her, until she herself was relaxed enough to return the kiss without much help.

“Yeah, like that,” Yoongi whispered, his fingers beginning to run through her hair as he pulled her down. Junghwa hummed, slowly getting used to the feeling, the both of their lips danced together as the sun began to set outside.

Their eyes widened slowly as they parted, their chests moving erratically but this time, Yoongi did not run.

“Wow…” Yoongi whispered, as he cursed under his breath. “, this is what I’ve been running away from?”
“Oh come on, I’m not that good.” Junghwa rolled her eyes, and Yoongi laughed, his hands cupping her cheeks.

“No. You weren’t good. You were great.” Yoongi kissed her forehead, making her giggle once more as she looked at him, her eyes turning soft as she gazed at him, whispering, “Finally, Yoongi.”
“I know. I’m sorry, but no more, okay?” He kissed her once more, never stopping, showing her just how much he loved her, trying to have his actions make up for the feelings in his heart he could not describe. Junghwa weaved her hands into his hair, before they parted and looked at each other with misty breaths leaving their mouths.

“I… forgot to turn on the heating from earlier.” Yoongi smiled sheepishly, his voice a quiet meek whisper in the silence of the bedroom. Junghwa snorted, shaking her head. How typical of Min Yoongi to turn off the heating and forgetting to turn it back on when it was getting cold.

“Of course, but that's fine.” Junghwa hugged him tightly. “Turn it on later. Let’s just take a nap, you can be my blanket.”
“And you can be mine.” He chuckled, as she moved to his side, allowing Yoongi to turn and face Junghwa, unable to stop his hand from reaching out and her cheek tenderly.

“Hwa…” Yoongi murmured, his heart was beating so fast and the words were on his tongue. Junghwa was making his nerves a mess, and he didn’t know how to calm himself down enough to just ask her-

“Yoongi, you’re shaking.” Junghwa blinked, before she came closer to him. “Is there something you want to say? Then say it, you know you don’t have to be afraid around me.”

Yoongi immediately calmed down, his heart still trembling but now he could hear himself think. He took a deep breath, looking her in the eyes. “I love you, Hwa… will you go out with me?”

oh yes here it is the moment the freaking moment are you all screaming because I am too