Dark days

Moonbin looked around the dimly lit room. He’s looking for the box of photo albums his grandmother said is in this storeroom. Even though it’s afternoon and the lights are on, this room with the dusty old boxes and weirdly shaped tall things wrapped in plastic still looked like Dracula’s lair. Moonbin is half expecting a black coffin hidden somewhere in here. Next time Luhan says “Dracula is nice and fun like Hotel Transylvania” he’ll smack him with his Drac figurine for thinking that rule applies to Dracula Untold. Their parents don’t know they chanced up the horror movie anyway.

Back to the point, Moonbin has an activity in his class and the requirement is to get older photographs of your family members as far as possible. Recent photographs would do if they don’t find any but Moonbin wants to use his family’s old pictures.

Sure he can find plenty on that massive wall in the family room but his grandmother’s froths in the mouth if you remove any picture on it. When Moonbin was fiddling with an old picture of his father and uncle, she shrieked and told him to find the old albums from the storeroom where they kept Yunho and Changmin’s old stuff.

Moonbin had pouted because it’s not often the good little boy is yelled at and he gets offended easily. He doesn’t get what a few missing pictures could do. The five year old can’t even fathom how that wall hasn’t fallen with the amount of pictures on them. Still, Jung Hyori always manages to find a spot for at least one picture every month. With Jiyool now being born, there’s a picture every week.

What Moonbin doesn’t get is that Hyori is flexible enough to take off some frames before putting up new ones. For every new picture, she’s taken down three, returned two in an album and arranged the third in some random spot in the house.

Moonbin flashed a torch on some boxes to check their labels because he sure as hell can’t see under that single bulb in the centre of the room. He walked over the boxes he doesn’t think important. Hyori had said to look for boxes marked ‘school’. they all contain a mix of different school stuff Yunho and Changmin had used. In one of them, a handful of albums were there. Now that he’s learning monosyllabic words in school, his family makes him practice reading by pointing at words they come across anywhere- from signboards, to restaurant menus, to children’s books and most especially grocery aisles. Making find the labelled boxes is just another reading exercise.

He’s looked at the boxes within reach on one side of the room in vain. He turned around to leave and call his grandmother to look at those boxes in the back. He’s not going to risk encountering a vampire by going deeper into the dark room.

Walking towards the door, he notices some things. Next to the door, is an unlabelled box with three books, a few small trophies and a few red and white shirts. Moonbin doesn’t know those are Yunho and Changmin’s uniforms from when they were in the high school basketball team. But Hyori had told him he will find at least one of those pretty trophies now dulled with time in those boxes.

Internally cheering (because he doesn’t want to inhale dust if he breathes too much) Moonbin rummages through that box and pulls out one of the large books. Wiping the dust on it doesn’t come to mind as he runs his finger on wine red cover, leaving a clear finger trail on the dusty surface as he now reads aloud out of habit. “Dong Bang Ss..sh..Shin Ki High School!” School! he was looking for the word school.

Happily, Moonbin runs to his grandmother with the book forgetting he had to look for the box marked school and not anything with the word school.

~~~

“Peeps, I’m home!” Jaejoong hollered toeing off the comfy yet elegant ballet-style slip-ons she wears to work. She let the maid who was standing with her hands stretched out take her bags and her coat.

“The little master Binnie is in the dining room with the Madam and master Yunho is in your room.” The young maid, IU, said when she noticed Jaejoong’s frown when no pitter patters of little feet were heard running towards her. even though Changmin will arrive later and Kibum is out with Junsu, Luhan always follows his ‘hyungie’ when Moonbin runs to welcome his mother. “Little master Lulu has been sent to the playhouse so he doesn’t disturb master Binnie’s schoolwork.”

“schoolwork…” Jaejoong’s interest peaked and she made her way to the dining room. Before she disappeared around the corner though, she halted and looked at IU sideways. “Do you realise how many times you said ‘Master’ just now? Last night, Luhan was asking if our family name’s ‘Little’ and his name’s ‘Master’.”

IU had a sheepish smile. “Sorry. Force of habit. I’ll try to switch to pronouns instead of using Master in front of the kids.”

“You can just call them by their names. They’ll listen better.” Jaejoong said and IU nodded. “As you say madam-”

“Eh?”

“I mean Jaejoong-ssi.”

Jaejoong nodded appreciatively and let IU get back to her job. She was never comfortable with the formalities that came with being the First Lady of the Jung empire but she’s grateful her husband’s family don’t enforce anything on her.

When she entered the dining room, she saw Hyori standing beside the table, working on a large piece of chart paper. Moonbin was sitting on his designated chair some chairs down, with a few books Jaejoong’s never seen before in the house. Assorted felt pens were scattered on the table with a few pictures and three chairs were put against the wall so they didn’t come in hyori’s way.

“Hey! Glad you're here.” Hyori waved at Jaejoong and then pointed at Moonbin who hasn’t noticed Jaejoong yet. “Grab the blue pen and get working. Your son’s no help.”

Jaejoong came over and took a look. Seeing the photographs, she facepalmed. “Dammit! I forgot again!” She remembers reading the email from Moonbin’s teacher to finish the family tree project.

His school has an email chain for parents of the kids for passing on information about homework, project work, items to be carried, events and the likes. Both Jaejoong and Yunho were very enthusiastic when he first started school, though Jaejoong wasn’t much help being grounded with Jiyool. After around 6 months of schooling, Moonbin’s parents haven’t been able to cope with the back-to-back craft activities, bake sales, costume parties and sports day. Good thing Moonbin’s such a bright child, that he’s able to relay every bit of information correctly to his grandparents. At the bake sale where Hyori’s lemon bars earned some fans, the Jung matriarch asked Moonbin’s teacher to add her to the email list. There hasn’t been any close shaves since then.

Though it doesn’t help Jaejoong to drive down the guilt path.

“I’m a horrible mother.” Jaejoong’s bottom lip jutted out.

“You're a good mother with an important job and a newborn baby. Binnie understands.” Hyori her hair comfortingly. For some reason, Hyori always felt she has to make up for Jaejin’s absence.

Jaejoong doesn’t realise but Hyori knows that each time Jaejoong feels inadequate as a mother is because of Jaejin’s early demise. Jaejoong grew up parentless and there’s only so much Junsu’s parents could do. Jaejoong never really got the chance to learn important life lessons from her mother as she grew and that’s completely okay. Because, they are all there to help her and each other through everything.

“Binnie, you’ll ruin your eyes if you read in this light.” Jaejoong huffed, not knowing Moonbin isn’t actually reading. He’s searching.

Moonbin looks up at his mother’s voice for and sees her only now. a smile slowly forms on his face as he jumps off his chair. “Mama!” he hugged Jaejoong’s waist like he always does when she’s home.

“Now you see me…” Jaejoong’s tone is complaining but she hugs him tight and plants a noise kiss on his crown. “Okay. I’m going to change and then you and I are going to complete your project okay?” and Moonbin nodded.

Hyori dropped the felt pen on the table and stretched her hands knowing Jaejoong wants to take over the rest. She’s done most of the ground work anyway.

Jaejoong made her way to their bedroom laughing slightly because Moonbin oh so dramatically realised he forgot his book halfway up the stairs and ran back to get it. she went on without him.

Opening the door, she saw the cutest sight she ever had the fortune of seeing these past six months.

Yunho was carrying their six month old daughter, who seems to be fighting sleep while having her face squished against Yunho’s chest. They are near the closed balcony doors, with the sunset falling on them. while Yunho doesn’t see her at the door, Jaejoong can clearly see their profile outlined by the reddish-orange glow.

And that’s not even the adorable part. The fluffy, honey-dripping, rainbow-puking factor is Yunho is doing his dream whispering thing.

“… and there are baby bears, white and fluffy like cotton candy and you play on purple clouds with rainbows all around you. When night comes, daddy piggybacks you back to the castle where you oppas…”

Yunho painted a dreamland for Jiyool while speaking in a whisper. His lips were near Jiyool’s face as he nuzzled her and pressed kisses on her cheeks occasionally. Jiyool had released one hand from her blanket and hooked it to the gap between two buttons of Yunho’s shirt which he hadn’t changed yet since he returned from office. She seemed loathe to fall asleep and not hear Yunho’s voice anymore as she opened her eyes each time her eyelids drooped.

Jaejoong empathises. She was the first Yunho did this for after all.

That time just after graduation. They had been in London for a week and a convalescent Jaejoong was having a hard time in an unfamiliar place, just started med school and her arm still had the remainder of when she went through a car windshield and was tortured by a madwoman. After two sleepless nights, Yunho had taken things into his own hands…literally.

He held Jaejoong close to his chest on the bed, not too hard to squish her and just enough to hear his heartbeat and feel her own synchronising with his heart. With his lips pressed against her face, Yunho whispered in a deep, soothing bass, telling her what to dream about. At that time, he had her imagine sleeping in her mother’s lap and playing on the clouds- though not purple but regular ol’ white. And Jaejoong found sleep knocking on the door for the first time in a while. However, she didn’t want to open the door.

Like Jiyool, Jaejoong loved Yunho’s whisper-voice. It is deep and earthy, not too soft, but not loud enough to startle you either. And the owner of those magical and controlled vocal cords is so emotive; he paints a world that almost sounds truer than real life. His voice is soothing like a lullaby and yet, you want to stay awake and listen to the verbal image of the magical world.

Jiyool’s just interested in Yunho’s voice. She’s a daddy’s girl and everything of Yunho has her charmed to the point of even refusing to sleep if it’s going to cut into her daddy-and-me time. Not like she understands what purple clouds are anyway.   

One thing Jaejoong is sure of though, Jiyool’s not interested in anything but the comfort he’s giving her right now. that first time Yunho did this for her took a unpredictable turn.

Even Jaejoong never knew that Yunho whispering sweet nothings about lilies and springtime is such a turn-on. That was the first time she took initiative, slamming the door on sleep and straddling a very willing Yunho.

Hearing him like this again and seeing him be all fatherly made Jaejoong’s body heat up that she wanted to put Jiyool in her nursery and pin her hunk of a husband to the bed with her itty bitty chubby hands… “What?” her train of thoughts made Jaejoong cringe and she slapped her cheeks lightly. “Stop thinking naughty thoughts Jaejoong…”

“I love your naughty thoughts…” Jaejoong looked up to find her husband standing three steps away from her with an amused face. “…especially since your definition of naughty is different from others.” Yunho stepped closer, intending to pass Jiyool to Jaejoong. Jaejoong took a moment to realise what he wanted before taking her baby.

She was out cold now that Yunho wasn’t whispering to her ears. She probably gave up fighting when Yunho stopped talking and was already letting out baby snores. Yunho though, brought his face closer to hers more than necessary. “what?” Jaejoong cocked an eyebrow.

Yunho smirked, looking at his wife from under his lashes. “whispering about a dreamland is a real turn-on for you isn’t it?” and he even dropped his tone down two notches to emphasise. But unlike before, Jaejoong’s too miffed by the teasing to get seduced and kicks him in the shin before stepping away.

“where are you going?” Yunho asked in a normal tone now. he thought Jaejoong would put Jiyool in her nursery so they could have some ‘uknow time’ but Jaejoong was heading to the crib in their room instead.   

“Not now.” Jaejoong said knowing full well what Yunho was expecting. She put Jiyool in the crib, placed her blanket over her and kept the teddy bear near her hand. Jaejoong turned and faced Yunho and crossed her arms with a slight pout. “Mother of the year has to help Binnie with school work.” And she plucked two pictures on the board above the crib hoping to use them.

“Aish! Was there another email?” Yunho ruffled his hair in frustration. Maybe he should just tell his secretary to remind him next time another email from Moonbin’s teacher comes. “another party?”

“that was last month…” Jaejoong was thoughtful for a moment. “though I think there’s the Christmas party coming up and the dress code is white, red and green. But anyway, this is an activity he has tomorrow. He has to make a family tree/collage and do a show and tell kinda thing.”  

Yunho took the photo Jaejoong was holding. He couldn’t resist the chuckle seeing the particular picture. Not at Moonbin dressed as Pikachu but honorary kindergarten member and party attender, Jung Luhan unrecognisable as Little Bo Peep.

“Oh! No wonder he was looking through our yearbook.” Yunho snapped his fingers as if he just made a very huge discovery in a crime mystery.

Jaejoong feels his reaction is exaggerated but she doesn’t comment on it. she just jumps to the other question. “you saw him with our high school yearbook?” Yunho missed the cringe in her tone.

“Well, it’s actually Changmin’s yearbook. He was supposed to get the old albums but he got that so mom had to find them herself. I don’t know why Min kept all his copies in the storeroom.” Yunho went to the dresser where they kept some miscellaneous items that didn’t go in the closet or the study. He pulled out a book from the middle drawer. “I preserved mine quite well.” He said proudly. “By the way, where’s yours? In your old apartment or you got it over here?”

Jaejoong had a blank face for a moment before she answered, “I didn’t get a copy.”

“Seriously?” Yunho’s eyes bugged out in surprise but he schooled his features immediately. He looked thoughtful as he came up with a reason himself. “well, I do remember you were absent when we collected them. I distinctly recollect fighting with that stupid council president to let me take your copy.”

“yeah… my perfect attendance record was ruined with all the leaves I took at the end of high school.” Jaejoong said, tad miffed that all her efforts to never miss a day of school went waste. Yunho pulled her in a one arm hug. “It was for good anyway. You had to get better. I’d chain you to the bed if you showed up at school.”

“like that time you did when Binnie was born.”

“let that go will you.”

Yunho went back to the drawer to keep the book back. When he shut the drawer, he suddenly realised something. “Hey, that time Junsu and Heechul didn’t collect them either.” Yunho looked at Jaejoong who was now busying herself in taking out her accessories. “Siwon said he lost his yearbook two days after we got them. Yoochun dumped his somewhere in his house just like Min.” Yunho went over these facts before laughing. “isn’t this funny? For once, I’m not the one who lost their stuff.” And he laughed as he went to the bathroom

Jaejoong sighed and rubbed the spot between her brows. She’s lost her energy to help Moonbin.

~~~

Jaejoong was on auto. She mindlessly washed the kids’ plates after getting rid of their leftovers and put it in their places all while staring into space, sighing and pouting alternatingly.

She’s grateful Yunho took over completing Moonbin’s project because Moonbin was v