Chapter: XV
CL's Anatomy
Chaerin had heard that life was made up of choices.
Right or wrong.
Good or evil.
Life or death.
She'd always been told to do the "right" thing, and stay away from the wrong. That being a "good girl" and making others happy would pay of eventually.
And she was told not to fear death, but also that all life is sacred. But right now she was beginning question both of those statements.
There was nothing special about her life, even though she did everything right.
She had never murdered someone, for pete's sake she become a doctor of all things! Someone who is trained to save lives, but in return sacrifice their own. Doctors were just simple, ordinary people who over time developed a certain god complex over time.
Having the "perfect life" wasn't easy, and she was finally starting to crack. All the that had happened in her life was finally catching up. She'd been running from it for so many years, but she couldn't run forever. The simple compartmentalize of her life was now falling apart, and Chaerin just couldn't put it back together.
"S-Seung-Hyun? You're, you're supposed to be dead. Does this mean, mean I'm dead too?" Her lungs burned and the room was almost spinning in a never ending circle to her.
"No, you're not dead. But you almost did die. What the hell were you thinking?! What would have happened if Ji Yong found you dead? Use your brain!" Seung-Hyun really didn't care if he was being harsh, Chaerin needed to it up.
"I can't anymore. I keep having dreams about my car accident, and when I found my sister dead. The way her body was so pale, almost like a ghost. I wish she had been a ghost, at least I could've told her that I loved her. And now, I'm worthless. I don't know how to relax or be happy, and I can't enjoy life. I just want to be done!" Raising her voice at the last part, tears began to stream down her cheeks, "And there I go ing crying that some stupid girl."
Seung-Hyun watched her strong girl façade crumble away. On the inside was just a scared, shy girl who wanted nothing more than to be content with everything.
"It's okay cry. It's okay to feel like this after all that's happened. It's okay, it's okay." He wasn't a psychologist, but he was damn near close.
"And Ji Yong is, is," Chaerin stopped and tilted her head down to rest her chin in the soft fabric of the robe she wore.
To be honest, Lee Chaerin didn't know how to put her love for Kwon Ji Yong into words. Maybe because she's never loved anyone this much, not even Choi Seung-Hyun. She didn't want to seem as if she didn't care about Ji Yong, but she just didn't know how to express it with giving off a shallow, mushy side that was definitely not her.
"Ji Yong is the best thing to happen to me." Seung-Hyun was very cognizant about Chaerin's feeling for the blonde, but this was the first time that he heard her really express it out loud.
"Tell him that. Tell him everything, once you do, he'll understand. Now I really must leave or this situation will only get worse. Now here," grabbing her hand, Seung-Hyun opened it and placed a piece of paper in it, "this is were I'll be if you ever need me. I love you so much, please learn to love yourself." Standing up slowly, Seung-Hyun gave one last heartfelt gaze to Chaerin before walking off hastily.
Seung-Hyun still knew he couldn't help her, he just had to give her a push. Only Ji Yong would be able to help her.
There Chaerin sat in an eerie silence, left with her own heavy thoughts. She'd have to tell Ji Yong everything.
And by everything, Chaerin meant everything.
* * * *
"Chae, I'm back. While I was out, I picked you up some red velvet cake, tampons, and some French movie that had an interesting cover. Anyway, I'm going to go take a nap because I could've sworn a saw someone that was dead." Walking into the master bedroom, the exhausted man set the plastic bag in the maroon ottoman.
"Yong, I need to tell you something."
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Hi!!!! Thank you so much for sticking with this story and it's horrible writing. I'm thinking of starting a new story about Dara, Seung-Hyun, Chaerin, and Ji Yong. Here's a small preview:
Chaerin sat in her car, shivering from the immense cold caused by the rainy fall weather.
"Oh my gosh, it's supposed to be nice, chilly weather, not ing pouring rain." Her honey blonde hair was soaking wet, but there was not way Chaerin was going to allow that to ruin her mood.
"Who gave you that necklace?" Someone questioned, scaring Chaerin and making her jump.
"What hell? How'd you get in my car?!"
Ji Yong scowled at her, then held up key, "I learned how to break into your car three days after you got your license. Now, who gave you that necklace?"
Sighing, Chaerin sat back and pulled out her phone. Clicking it on, Ji Yong quickly snatched it from her hand.
"Give me my phone back and get the hell out of my car." Shooting an annoyed glare towards Ji Yong, and yet he didn't flinch.
"I'll give your damn phone back if you tell me who got you that ing necklace?! Was it Seung-Hyun?"
"Shut up and get the hell out of my car! Why don't you just go crying back to that little Dara. She has you on a leash anyway!"
Oh my goodness, thank you all for 100 subcribers! I hope that you all enjoy me story and thank you all for you wonderful comments!
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