Chapter 16
My Ten Letters To You
Key,
We've been through a tough journey. A really tough one. We've done a lot of mistakes, especially me.
We had a happy start. You were my bestfriend. I had all sorts of fun with you. Then after a long time, I realized how much I really loved you. And even if you think I'm lying, I'm not. The love I felt for you was way different than the past girlfriends that I had. And when I told you that, it was here, right on spot on the field, where I also gave you that ring. This was also the spot where you told me that you loved me first.
But as months pass by it seemed that it was getting a little boring for me. I started seeing someone else. A girl. She attended my music classes with me and sooner, we were more than friends. I kept this from you, but I didn't want to break up with you. You found out, and you were always crying from that day on.
One night I saw you, teary eyed. I knew it was about me, you kept pushing me to go, but I wanted to say sorry. I was already crying, but so were you. I wanted to get closer to you, but step by step, you were nearing the part of the road where cars drive through. I ran towards you, but it was too late. We got hit by a car.
You have no idea how painful it was for me, to hear from others that you were almost dying. Because of me. I've been blaming myself for that moment, for that night. That night when we almost got killed together. It was my mistake, for not loving you truly, for hurting you. Mianhe. I'm sorry for letting you trust me and make you cry. I'm sorry for those times that I weren't around and you were waiting for me. I'm sorry about that night, when I kissed someone else. I'm sorry for letting you get hit by that car with me. I'm sorry, for letting you love me so deeply. That night of the accident I kept crying, I kept blaming myself, it should have been me in there, instead of you. You had enough pain already. Everyday, I wished I could see you. My room was next to yours.Onew hyung told me one day in the hospital that you could no longer remember me. And that made me start to write you letters. I wanted you to remember me.
Then you went back to school yesterday and you were so happy. Maybe you had a glimpse of me. I was the one who handed you the letters sent by students. I was the one who gave you all those pink candies. And of course, I was the one who placed the letter on your desk.
I missed hearing your voice, making you laugh and holding your hands.
I love you, better than before. I love you longer. I love you more and I love you forever... I hope that by now, you'll remember me, my key...
Jonghyun.
Tears started to fall down from Key's eyes. He remembers him now. He remembers everything they've been though. It was a sudden flash of thoughts. All the things that happened between them suddenly appeared in Key's mind. He was the blurry image. He was the one whom he loved. He was the painting that Key made a while ago. Key closed the letter and hid it inside his bag. Key noticed that a shadow was covering him from the sunlight. He stood up and grabbed his bag to leave and turned around facing the person.
The person was looking at him. He was a little shorter than Key, he had an updo hair. Key couldn't find out whether that person was happy or not. Key coudn't stop crying because he knew, who this person was.
"..." Tears were consistently dropping from Key's eyes.
Without any thinking, he dropped his bag and hugged the person tightly. He had never hugged someone so tight before. He felt as if he had release a gallon of feelings to that person.
"Key-ah, do you...do you remember me now?"
"...Nae."
"I...I missed you so much." Jonghyun replied
Jonghyun smiled and grabbed the box where the ring had been placed.
They both sat down on the field. Key was still crying and Jonghyun was wiping the tears.
"I've missed those times...haengbokhaesotdon [the times i've been happy], sarangiotdon[ the times it was love]...bogo shipeo saranghanda [ i missed loving you]."
" I remember everything now. I just want you to know that even though I couldn't remember you, I really loved you...I don't even know who you are." Key said.
"I kept myself a secret until you're here, in school. Until you're okay... I always asked Onew hyung about you, and thank God that each day, you were getting better and better." Jonghyun said, grabbing Key's hand and holding it tight.
"You were the missing person in my life." Key replied. At last, his tears started to slow down.
Key looked at the letter again. Reading some of the words that Jonghyun had written.
"Mianhe..."
Tears started to flow from Jonghyun's eyes.
"It's okay...It's been a long time si--"
"Mianhe, still...For breaking your heart. For everything you've been through with me. I know that sorries won't be able to fully heal those scars."
"Everything happens for a reason and I regret nothing between you and me."
"I didn't know what---what lead me to do that...I was so stupid."
"People do stupid things but...I've forgiven you already I just want to see you again, to remember you. That's what matters to me now, don't cry anymore."
Jonghyun caressed his hand and kissed it.
" Since we'll start over again, what were the words that you said to me on this field months ago?" Key asked.
"Okay, If I can remember it." Jonghyun replied. "These past weeks I've been giving you letters and gifts...doesn't it seem abnormal to you?"
Key giggled. "Well, sort of. Why? Is it bad?"
Jonghyun giggled as well, he can remember that Key said that.
"No...the reason why I'm giving you these gifts is because...because I..."
"You what?" Key replied.
" I love you."
"..."
"Well, that's funny because I fell in love with you too, even though I don't know who the hell kept sending me those letters and gifts." Key answered.
Jonghyun laughed.
"But if I remember correctly, I fell in love with you first. Key said.
"I have a question for you." Jonghyun added, as he gets closer to Key.
"What is it?"
"Can I, kiss you?" Jonghyun asked.
Key closed his eyes without answering. Jonghyun pressed his lips against Key's. He started to kiss Key's neck and he could hear Key saying I love you too, Jonghyun. Key opened his eyes and Jonghyun was already wearing the ring to his finger. Jonghyun kissed Key's hand and kissed him on the forehead.
"I love you." Jonghyun said.
"I love you too." Key whispered.
"This is my first gift, to the first boy I will love forever." Jonghyun said.
Key smiled. He started to unpack Jonghyun's gifts. Finally, he pulled out the notebook containing all the letters. He pasted the last letter right next to the 9th one. He wrote Kim Jonghyun on the last page and closed it.
Key grabbed a black marker. On the front cover her wrote: HIS TEN LETTERS TO ME.
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