Daydreams
Pinky-PromisesIt had been two weeks since Jaehwan realized his feelings for Taekwoon. It had been two weeks since he told Hakyeon about it. It had been two weeks since Taekwoon got rid of Jinsu for good. It had been two weeks since Jaehwan started driving himself crazy.
No matter what was going on, Jaehwan found himself zoning out and thinking of things he shouldn't be thinking about. Ever since he came to the realization of his feelings for Taekwoon, he had daydreams about the two of them together. Whenever his mind was given the opportunity to drift, he'd find himself imagining a scenario of the two of them kissing, or the two of them on a date, or the two of them having s-
"Jaehwan?" Hongbin was waving a hand in front of Jaehwan's face to get his attention. "You ok? You've been zoning out a lot lately."
"I-I'm fine, sorry. I just haven't been getting much sleep...yeah..." Jaehwan saw Hakyeon give him a smirk, and he saw Taekwoon looking at him with concern.
Of course, everything went back to Taekwoon. Jaehwan was starting to hate his best friend. Every little show of affection or worry over him had Jaehwan's heart fluttering, and he didn't need that. He didn't need Taekwoon to look every time he shifted in his seat. He didn't need Taekwoon to stare intently at him whenever he spoke. He didn't need Taekwoon to talk if it meant that Jaehwan was just going to stare at his lips and slip into another daydream.
"Duck-face, you're drooling." Hakyeon watched with amusement as Jaehwan rapidly wiped at his chin. "Did you even hear what I said?"
"Um...no...?" Jaehwan saw Hakyeon frown at that, and he offered a smile.
"I said that I'm going to the beach with my Wonshikkie for the upcoming break, so neither of us will be available to anyone for any sort of reason."
"Hakyeon, you're disgusting."
"What?"
"Nothing."
"That's what I thought."
The group of six was at Hongbin's house, which was an interesting change. They were sprawled on the couches and the floor of the living room, talking about nothing and everything. Jaehwan and Taekwoon were sitting side by side, and it frustrated Jaehwan when the latter began leaning on him. It seemed as if everything was working against him, and he found it difficult to think straight, even when Taekwoon wasn't around.
When Jaehwan told Hakyeon about his feelings for Taekwoon, he had expected to be helped. He should have known better. Ever since he told Hakyeon, the latter took every possible opportunity to force the two of them to do things that seemed couple-like. Whenever those situations came up, Jaehwan would glare at Hakyeon as angrily as possible. It was hard to do, though, when he was a little happy on the inside everytime Hakyeon tried to help him out.
Taekwoon put his full weight against Jaehwan's side as Hakyeon kept talking about his upcoming trip, and Jaehwan began shifting around uncomfortably. Right when Taekwoon put his head on Jaehwan's shoulder, the latter shot up, causing Taekwoon to fall over on the couch. Everyone was now staring at him, and he blushed slightly out of embarrassment. Jaehwan cleared his throat and mumbled something about needing to pee before heading off to the bathroom.
"Freaking Taekwoon and his freaking self with his freaking lips and his freaking face..." Jaehwan angrily mumbled to himself as he locked the door and stared at his reflection. He splashed his face with cold water and resumed his staring. "He's making me go crazy I swear..."
"Jaehwan?" A knock accompanied the call of his name, and it took everything within him to suppress a groan. "Are you alright?"
"Yeah, Taekwoon. I'm fine." Jaehwan made a face at his reflection. Of course it was Taekwoon that decided to check up on him.
"You've been in there for a while. We were starting to worry."
"I doubt they were worried. Are you sure it wasn't just you thinking too much?" Jaehwan realized that he sounded tired, and he waited for a reply.
"Are you sure that you're alright?" Taekwoon sounded extremely concerned, and Jaehwan bit his lip.
"I told you, I'm fine. Lighten up, Taekwoon! You're starting to sound like a mother." Jaehwan tried to sound more cheerful to get Taekwoon to stop worrying about him.
"Jaehwan." Taekwoon sighed from the other side of the door. "I hope you're not lying to me."
"Oh, come on. Taekwoon, when have I ever lied to you?" There was a pause and Jaehwan held his breath.
"Open the door."
"What?" Jaehwan began to panic internally since he wasn't yet ready to face Taekwoon and have yet another onslaught of daydreams. "Why should I? I'm fine with how we're talking now."
"There is a door between us, and I like to see your face when we're talking. It's easier for me to tell how you're feeling that way."
"Well, I already told you that I'm fine, so there's no need." Jaehwan felt his heart flutter at Taekwoon's words, and he mentally cursed since Taekwoon had told him something similar before, just without any reaction from Jaehwan.
"I'm not leaving until you open the door." Jaehwan heard the door creak, signaling that Taekwoon was leaning on it. Jaehwan did the same, staring at his reflection.
"Taekwoon, I'm in the bathroom for God's sake."
"To hide, obviously." There was another pause in conversation. "Please just tell me what's on your mind. I'm worried."
"You don't want to know what's on my mind."
"Jaehwan, I can't try to understand why you're feeling bad when you won't tell me. And there's nothing that you could possibly tell me that I wouldn't expect from you." Taekwoon went quiet and Jaehwan took a deep breath before deciding to risk an answer.
"I want to kiss you. I want to kiss you and it frustrates me that I can't because I know you don't want me kissing you again." When Jaehwan thought that Taekwoon finally left him alone, even if it was out of disgust, the older male spoke.
"But what if I do?" It was barely a whisper, even harder to hear with the door between them, but Jaehwan heard what he said. "What if I do want you kissing me again?"
"Then I'd say that I don't believe you." Jaehwan let out a laugh that was more of a sigh. "But I'd be about as happy as a thirteen year old girl when her crush confesses to her."
Silence settled between them again, and Jaehwan took his weight off the door and turned to face it. Jaehwan was impulsive, and it didn't land him in good situations most of the time. This was one of those times, and Jaehwan felt the weight of his regret settle on his shoulders. The silence became suffocating, and Jaehwan thought that he would crawl out Hongbin's bathroom window if there was one.
"Open the door." There was something in Taekwoon's voice that was different, and Jaehwan mentally prepared himself before going to open the door. He had nothing more to lose anyway.
"Hi." Jaehwan's voice was small when he spoke. Taekwoon looked slightly intimidating at the moment, and Jaehwan really wished Hongbin's bathroom had a window.
"You're stupid."
Suddenly, Jaehwan's lips were met by Taekwoon's, and he didn't know what to think. Taekwoon was gently pushing him back in the bathroom, closing the door and locking it in the process. It was slightly awkward, but Jaehwan's heart was thundering in his chest. He was pushed against the counter, and his lips involuntarily parted to welcome Taekwoon's tongue. Taekwoon's hand was slowly creeping up his shirt, and Jaehwan let out an unmanly squeak before pushing Taekwoon away.
"This needs to stop." Jaehwan stared at his reflection and crinkled his nose at himself in disgust. He the faucet again to splash more water on his face before leaving his temporary sanctuary.
Everyone turned to look at him when he walked in the living room, but Jaehwan ignored his friends and sat back down on the couch, as far away from Taekwoon as he could get. Everyone was still staring at him, and it was getting difficult to ignore them.
"What?" Jaehwan's internally cringed when his voice sounded harsher than he had intended, and all his friends took on a look of surprise.
"Nothing, nothing." Hongbin was the first to speak. "You just look really out of it."
"I told you already, I haven't gotten enough sleep lately." Jaehwan sighed and smiled. "I'm fine, really."
He noticed how everyone turned to Taekwoon as if silently asking if Jaehwan was telling the truth, but Taekwoon just looked confused. Jaehwan felt a little bad about lying and worrying his closest friends, but he wasn't going to tell them the truth anytime soon. Hakyeon will get to know eventually, but Jaehwan just wanted them to drop the subject.
"Maybe...maybe we should go home, Jaehwan." Taekwoon placed a gentle hand on his arm, and he tensed at the touch. "It's the weekend, so you should catch up on your sleep."
"I'll go home." Jaehwan brushed Taekwoon's hand off his arm and stood up. "You stay here. I don't wanna ruin your fun."
"Jaehwan..."
"Bye, guys. Sorry about just leaving like this." He walked to the door and waved. "I'll buy you guys coffee or something next time we hang out."
There was a chorus of confused 'goodbyes' just before Jaehwan shut the door, and he tucked his hands inside his pockets and slowly walked away. He counted down in his head, and he heard the door open and shut again before he felt Taekwoon grab onto his wrist. He knew Taekwoon would follow him out. Taekwoon would never leave Jaehwan alone if he felt something was wrong, even if the latter insisted. It was one of those traits that should be annoying but wasn't.
"Let's go home." Taekwoon's voice was quiet; the quiet it was usually at when he was talking to someone that wasn't his friend. Jaehwan's heart tightened in his chest because he knew Taekwoon was feeling uncertain if he was talking at that volume.
"Yeah..." Jaehwan gently shook Taekwoon's hand off of his wrist and loosely held it in his own instead. He felt Taekwoon look at him, but instead of asking questions, Taekwoon just tightened his grip.
Jaehwan was sure he was asking for more than he could get.
A/N: Hi guys. That's right, I'm alive. and I'm sO SO SO SO SO SOSOSOSOSOSOSOSOSOSO SORRY FOR HAVING NOT UPDATING IN SO MANY MONTHS LIKE I'M SO VERY REALLY EXTREMELY SORRY AND I DON'T EVEN HAVE A GOOD EXCUSE AND I'M JUST REALLY SORRY.
This was such a crappy chapter too ;-; I'm sorry you guys.
I didn't even get to fangirl with you guys about Eternity or the wins or anything because I didn't do anything on here for like that entire era and I'm so sorry. Please forgive me and don't hate me ;-; please.
But, you know, since I haven't updated in forever (sorry) it's shoutout time! hehehe...even though there was a shoutout last chapter...
How did I get so many of you from doing nothing omg ._. I am not worthy
But, anywho, much love~!
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