For tokyogaijin + LoveNeedsSpark

White Rose

Is there a term for someone who is quieter than a wallflower? If there was, then Oh Hayoung was still searching for the answer. She didn't speak. She was silent. But it was by choice. She thought that she would have sounded stupid if she spoke. The truth was that she was deaf, and her lack of hearing also plummeted her confidence in speaking.

No one really took notice of her, and when they did, they had that look, as if to say, look at that freak, by herself, or, it's the mute. She had no friends, and although she had attempted to make some on her first day of school, she couldn't interact with the other students and therefore became somewhat of a social outcast.

Other than that, Hayoung was an exceptionally bright student. Since she had no friends, she dedicated her time to study, and in turn, her results were always at the top. She had to put in extra effort, by seeing her teachers during lunch and before or after school so that she could get the lesson plan down and have a better understanding. Her life basically had its routine, and although she found it monotonous, she believed that her condition would never let her break out of it.

Her parents were her support unit, and if she had to admit it, her only friends. She would have her phone with her at all times, so that she could disguise the fact that she had nothing better to do at lunch after eating. In gym class or during team building games and activities, Hayoung relied on her ability to adapt to situations quickly. She had had enough practice at following what others were doing, so as not to get noticed unnecessarily. Of course, she just couldn't help that she got things wrong sometimes, and would cause the loss I the game, like when, there was a rule that every girl on the team must touch the ball at least once during basketball before any of the guys could shoot. She would miss the ball, or pass it to the wrong person, receiving glares from everyone I her team and a mocking pat on the back from the other team’s players. If she fell flat on her face, no one would be there to help her back up.

On the bus ride home from school, she would put her earphones in, so that if anyone ever tried to talk to her, she would have an excuse not to reply. It always worked, or no one just wanted to talk to her. Still, she tried, to more or less fit in. She thought she was pretty. She was tall as well, and she would try to dress up nicely every day. Even if what she thought about herself was what mattered to her the most, she looked out for other people’s opinions too. She could read their lips, and sometimes, she would "eavesdrop" on conversations by doing just that. Hey, at least she was in the know about the latest gossip and happenings at school.

 If she wasn't talking to teachers in the staff room, in her classes, or in the library, Hayoung had spent most of her time in the school garden. It was peaceful there, and there was a shortcut from there to get to class. It's in that garden that she tries to speak. There, no one judges her. Her voice just gets carried away with the wind, falling atop the leaves and the petals of the flowers. 

The vibration from the alarm on her phone brings her out of her thoughts. She had two minutes to get to her next class. It was English. English was probably her worst subject, and it was taught by her least favorite teacher. She couldn't say that she hated the guy, because Hayoung doesn't believe in hating other people. She was just too kind. She took a seat in her usual spot in the front row by the teacher’s desk. After a brief introduction, the teacher decided, as a punishment for the class rudely talking during his class spiel that they would have to do impromptu speeches on any topic of their choice. It would have to be for at least one minute long. Hayoung dreaded these things because she felt guilty for always being excused, but at least no one had to hear her talk.

She payed attention to each and every speech given by the members of the class, but the last one, which was by the class joker, made her heart drop to the pit the of her stomach. They clapped for the end of his talk, but then, he pointed to her and looked at the teacher. She could read his lips.

“Sir, aren’t you going to make Hayoung do it? She never does it and it’s unfair.”

She looked towards the teacher, and although he pretended to think for a minute, Hayoung’s mind went blank when the teacher urged her to get up in front of the class. When she didn’t budge from her seat, he made a stronger gesture for her to move to the front. Hayoung stood there, mortified. All eyes were on her, and she swore that they were already judging her.

“I…”

She opened to let out a sound which she thought was ‘I’, and the beginning of a sentence, but all of a sudden, someone grabbed her hand. When she looked up to see who it was, it was none other than Oh Sehun, a junior, MVP in the school basketball team, and guy that every girl in the entire school wanted to date. He didn’t make eye contact with her so she stared at his lips to read what he was saying to the teacher.

“Sir, her and I need to have a meeting with the school advisor, and we need to go now. She probably won’t be back for the rest of the class. Please, excuse us.”

The teacher gave his approval and Sehun pulled her out of the door, while all the girls sighed and the class joker hit his fist against the table. He pulled her towards the gym, where they sat with their backs against the wall, facing each other. Hayoung didn’t know what to do. He began to talk.

“We have half an hour before the bell rings for lunch. What do you want to do?”

She shook her head and pulled her knees towards her chest and hugged them. Sehun put his hand on top of her and pulled them away so that she was resting comfortably against the wall. He tapped her arm to get her to look at him.

“Hey, I’m not going to hurt you. If you’ve forgotten, I’m the one who saved you from that speech…”

She watched him laugh, but she didn’t want to let her guard down. He didn’t give up, though. He put his backpack in front of him and retrieved a small notebook and a sharpie, and began to write.

Is it better if we talk like this?

Hayoung nodded, and then put her head back down.

I don’t really like that teacher.

Hayoung felt that he was being genuinely nice to her but she couldn’t help the lingering feeling that it was all insincere. She took out her notebook and wrote down a quick message.

Why are you doing this? Why did you save me, back there?

You looked like you were in trouble. I just thought you needed some rescuing. Come on Hayoung, help me out here. I’m just trying to be your friend.

There it was. Hayoung couldn’t believe it. First, he knew her name, and second, he wanted to be her friend. She looked into his eyes and saw that they were clear; that they weren’t lying. She scribbled down something she knew she should have said earlier.

Thank you, Sehun

You’re welcome. Anytime that you need help, I’m here for you. Jongdae’s a bit of a joker, but he’s a nice guy. And all the others who give you a hard time, don’t worry about them. You’re a way better person.

Hayoung noticed that his writing was a bit messy, but still legible, and after a while, he started shaking his hands, from all the writing that he was doing. Although she was enjoying his company, and liking the feeling of having a friend, this snapped her back into her reality. Eventually, he would get tired of writing. He would get tired of having to communicate by paper. He would get tired of having one sided conversations if he chose to speak. She checked her phone. There was only two minutes till the bell rang. After that, this would have all been over. She decided to give him one final test for his sincerity. She knew that she was overdoing it, and probably being paranoid, but she couldn’t help it. She didn’t want to look like an idiot, if he was just playing her.

She scribbled down the phone number of her mother’s flower shop. If he wanted to be her friend, he would call, and as a bonus, would have spoken to her mother. If he didn’t, then at least he didn’t have her personal number that he could spread to others and they could send her malicious texts.

She handed him the piece of paper. He looked at it for a second then stared at her with a puzzled expression.

“What’s this?”

The bell rang. Hayoung grabbed her bag and ran out of the gym.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

AN: Hey guys! A bit of a long character introduction, I hope you don’t mind. I just thought I needed to explain why Hayoung would have felt so guarded towards Sehun. I have a lot of requests from you guys, and it’s a bit slow updating right now, but I hope you’ll be patient. I promise I’ll do them as soon as I can! Oh, and before I forget, White Rose symbolises silence in Japanese and I thought it would be a fitting title, even though I thought that I wouldn’t write about roses. But, never say never…