“It’s pretty generous of Nichkhun to let me come on this trip with you. Not to mention, everything’s been paid for.”

Jiyoung stretched her legs out in front of her, on the beach chair, and turned to her left – where her best friend, Choi Jinri, was calmly sipping her mango juice.

“To tell you the truth, I was taken by surprise too,” Jiyoung admitted. “He just presented me with the tickets and told me to pack up my things quickly for a 3-days trip.”

Jinri set her glass down on the small table between them and sat up straight in her seat.

“Don’t you find it suspicious?”

“What is?”

“Your husband. Why do you think he’s sending you off so abruptly? It’s like...he’s in a hurry to see you leave...” she let her voice trailed off, allowing Jiyoung to make her own assumptions.

It only took her a second to realise the direction Jinri was driving at.

“Nichkhun isn’t the type to cheat,” Jiyoung said firmly, even though deep inside – a part of her was starting to feel uneasy. “And even if he really does so...I have no right to stop him.”

“What are you talking about?” Jinri exclaimed. “You’re his wife! Of course you do.”

Jiyoung inhaled sharply and shut her eyes closed as she leaned back against the head-rest. “In case you’ve forgotten, I haven’t exactly been the most faithful wife either.”

She heard Jinri sighing loudly from beside her.

“Don’t tell me you’re still seeing Gi Kwang.”

“I’m not.”

“Then?”

“But I did.”

“I don’t understand you,” Jinri grunted. “You already have a good man in your life, why are you still chasing after your past?”

“Gi Kwang became my past unwillingly,” Jiyoung said nonchalantly.

“Why can’t you just take it that you guys are not meant to be together?”

“I have,” Jiyoung replied calmly.

“Then?”

She kept quiet.

“Jiyoung...” Jinri spoke again. “Do you love Nichkhun?”

Jiyoung paused for the second time, this time much longer than the first one. She pictured his face in her mind, his beautiful smiling face – his kind, patient face.

After what it seemed like an eternity had passed, she finally spoke up softly.

“I do.”

~

The next day, Jiyoung came home to an empty house. Her eyes searched every corner of the large house carefully, straining her ears hard for every possible little sound – but heard nothing.

Checking the time on her wrist watch, it was already thirty minutes past six, meaning Nichkhun would usually already be home from work.

She suddenly felt sick recalling back Jinri’s words, but simply pushed the unwanted thoughts away.

Closing the door gently behind her, Jiyoung kicked off her shoes near the entrance and walked in tiredly towards the living room – where she placed her duffel bag on the floor next to the sofa and plopped herself down on the cushion.

After stretching out her arms and legs comfortably, she bent down to take her phone out from her bag, when a piece of white paper on the coffee table caught her eye.

Curious as to what it was (because she remembered it wasn’t there when she left a few days ago), she picked it up gingerly and peeled it open.

As her eyes carefully scanned each and every word written down, she could feel her heart sinking deeper and deeper.

To my dearest Jiyoungie,

                                  I’m sorry I have to take this cowardly way out of letting you go. Because I don’t think I would be able to leave, if I were to look at your face and see you smiling back at me.

I don’t think I would have the heart to walk away, if you were to hold onto my hand and plead me not to go. Because you know, I do not have the power to decline you. Anything you wish for, I would do it for you.

I would not be able to look you in the eye and act as if everything’s going to be okay. I cannot let you see my weak side. I cannot let you see me cry. I cannot let you see my tears.

But it’ll be fine. You will be fine. I know, because I’m leaving you in good hands. I’m not going to hold you back from your happiness anymore. Go, Jiyoung. Go to the man you love. You deserve it. You deserve to be happy.

The only thing I can say now, is that I am sorry. I’m sorry for not being able to give you the happiness that you very much deserve.

 Thank you for being my wife, even if our marriage can only last till here. Thank you for everything. Because for 3 whole months, you’ve made me feel as if I’m the luckiest man alive.

Next to this note, you can find the divorce papers. I’ve already signed them. Everything is up to you now.

Kang Ji Young, please always remember that I let you go not because I’ve stopped loving you – but it’s because I love you more than I love myself.

Yours sincerely,

Khun.