Already a couple of days have passed since the incident.

Seonyul was still going to school and to work.

After she got almost kidnapped, G.O has been following her everywhere and watched her every move, 24/7, to the extent of even coming to class with her and to her work. Even with the guards Seungho sent, he wanted to keep his own eyes on her.

He knew that those men wouldn't back down once they find their victim. Even though they failed to get her, it wouldn't stop them to try once more and that's what scared him the most.

He reassured her that she didn't have to worry with him being around, not mentioning the other spies following her around. She still didn't know what he did for a living, noticing that she didn't really paid attention to that detail since she was still afraid of reliving the incident.

Now that he was by her side more often, he could barely remember the days where he hasn't even met Seonyul.

It's been four months since he met her.

Somehow it felt like four years; it felt like he always knew her. In those months, he grew to love her. He doesn’t remember when was the exact moment he fell in love, but he remembered his first night with her. He remembered the feeling he had the first time his hands made contact with her warm skin, the first time his lips tasted hers, the first time he felt her inside of him.

He remembered having that feeling of familiarity. The moment he touched her, his instinct were calling out to him, knowing every soft spot on her gorgeous body despite not having the chance of exploring it before.

Those lustful and emotional nights brought him his unexplained visions. In the beginning, he thought he was daydreaming about her, but along the way he knew that it was much more than simple dreams of his lover.

‘Why were they there and what did they mean?’

He didn't put to much focus on them. Even though they were hurting him, he was thinking about something else that bothered him.

His name. She only knew him by G.O and not by Byunghee, but every time she would say his real name, he would think that she is calling him and not the other Byunghee, and because of that he hated his name.

She cries calling out that name and he hates it. He always thought that she met someone else sporting that same name and blamed him for breaking his Dahlia's heart. Every time she would lose control of herself she would sometimes cry herself to sleep, in his arms. She felt comfort being held by him. So many things happened between them and he was still by her side protecting her from her own insanity and she was grateful, but she knew that it wasn't enough. It wasn't enough for him. He wanted to be in her mind and her heart. He wanted to be able to properly love her and give her his all but he couldn't and it killed him.

How many times has he thought of confessing his feelings to her and hoping that she would respond to them?

Despite all the fixing and protecting, she wasn't the only one that needed someone.

He did too.

He needed someone to love and it was Dahlia. Only her. All he needed in this harsh and cold world was his fallen angel. Just to feel the warmth radiating from her body would send shivers down his spine, but all he wanted was to feel her love.

Frankly, G.O was afraid.

He was afraid of having to feel his heart breaking into pieces. For now, only cracks were staining it. It could still stand but it was weak and almost empty.

Never has he been through something like this. The thought of falling in love was out of the question, especially because of his work. Only when he met her, he could feel himself battling with his statement.

Everything was so messed up, but beneath all disorder, the woman that was by his side was the only thing that was giving him a clear vision of what he wanted, of what his heart asked him to do and this, despite the consequences in the near future. 

One week later and still nothing happened. Seonyul felt a little relieved, thinking that everything just blew over. Even though a part of her was pleased, she still needed comfort: not from G.O but from someone else.

Her mother.

With the heavy jobs her parents carried, they would come and go from their work to their home, which left Seonyul all alone. Working in hotel management, her mother has been traveling all around the world and had barely been at home properly resting and spending some quality time with the rest of her family. Though she was far away, Seonyul needed her mom more than ever, especially with what's been going on lately.

She got up from her bed, leaving G.O, who was still asleep, behind and went downstairs. Taking the phone from the living room, she headed to the kitchen and dialed her mother cell phone number. Finally after a couple of rings, she picked up, leaving a sigh of relief.

“Hello?”

“Mom? It's me…”

“Oh honey! How are you? Is everything okay?”

“Are you busy? I want to talk to you. Actually I need to talk to you.”

“What's going on? You sound worried”

“He's back, mom…”

“Who's back, honey?”

“Byunghee…”

“What are you talking about? I thought he was… dead, are you sure it's him?”

“Yes…”

“Darling, I feel like there's more to what you want to tell me. I'll leave for the airport and be home as soon as possible-“

“It's okay, don't… I know you're busy, I just wanted to hear your voice, can I just tell you over the phone?”

“If you need me to get home, I'll leave right now.”

“ I know, but it's okay, I just want to talk… I don't have anybody else to talk too about this”

“Okay… Go ahead, what's going on sweetie?”

And with that, she explained everything that happened from day one. How she met him again, four months ago but seemed to have lost all knowledge about his old life; how they've been hanging out everyday, how she's been going through her episodes with him by her side and how she wished to have him back.

“It's like he's a complete different person… I know it's him, something tells me it is, but I just can't stop thinking that it's one of those hallucinations and that this man is just someone else. I don't know what to do anymore, mom… I miss Byunghee so much and seeing G.O around, I can't stop hoping that he's the one I lost. Truthfully, it doesn't really help having him around but I just can't let him go, I need him but at the same time he's not the one I want… It's been too long since Byunghee left and I still can't- I still feel like he's alive somewhere but just… lost. I need your help mom, I don't know what to do anymore…”

“My poor baby… Knowing that you're going through all this, I would've come straight home. Why didn't you tell me? Honey… I know you want Byunghee back; I know how much you loved him and how much he meant to you… Maybe you're feeling this way because you have feelings for G.O? Have you ever thought about it?”

“Feelings? For him? I don't… Well, I don't think I do… We're just… friends?”

“You're telling me you don't want him around but somehow can't manage to let him go; he's been by your side despite all the difficulties you're going through rehabilitating yourself and you need him but at the same time you want someone else… Have you ever thought about his feelings on this? What is you're heart telling you when you're with him?”

“It screams in pain. It hurts so much sometime but on others, I don't feel anything…”

“I wish that I could be here honey and help you through it… It's not easy for you and I don't know what to say to help you. You have to let him go. You have to let Byunghee go. I know you still love him, but he's not here anymore… Instead you have someone that is by your side helping you. I know it's not the one you want but like this saying, the heart doesn't chose the one you fall in love with, and baby, you're falling for him. You don't know it yet because you still love Byunghee, but deep down in that broken heart of yours, that man that is with you is the one mending it, slowly and carefully. Give him a chance. I'm not saying it's going to be easy, it won't, but the past is the past and you have to look upfront.”

“Mom… I'm afraid to let him go, because if I do that, it means that he's really gone and I don't want that, I'm still not ready to accept that. I miss him so much it's driving me insane. I can't stand to feel this anymore. I don't know what to do anymore. I'm loving alone and I hate it.”

“My dear sweet Melody, listen to me. Don't hate yourself, please. I almost lost you twice and I don't want to go through it again, neither does your father. It hurts us to see you like this honey. Losing someone you love is not something to forget nor to get over it, it's not something to accept because you feel like a part of you died along with that person, but it doesn't mean that you have to give up. There's always something worth fighting for.”

“And what is that? Because I don't know. I don't know what the hell I'm suppose to do.”

“You have to find it on your own. I can't do this for you, Seonyul-ah. I'm sure you'll find this something and once you do, don't ever let it go, because you'll regret if you do. Nobody is meant to live in this world alone, we all need somebody by our side, our rock, someone that is willing to stay no matter the consequences. Don't give up, please. Your father and I are here for you, but I know it's not enough. Byunghee meant the world to you and now that he's gone, everything went with it but it doesn't mean you can't build it again. You did it once and you can do it again. Maybe this is what is supposed to happen. You're in pain, but in the end, you'll know how to smile again, I'm sure of it.”

“Thank you mom… I needed this… I just don't know where to start… I'm afraid”

“I know you are sweetie, but don't be. I'm here, your father is here and like you said earlier, G.O is here too”

“I know he is but I'm sure he's getting sick of it –“

“I'm not though…”

From her seat at the table, she lifts her head up and sees G.O leaning against the doorframe of the kitchen, looking like he's been listening to the conversation for a while now. He was looking straight at Seonyul who was looking shocked at his sudden appearance.

“How long have you been standing here?”

“Long enough to know what you think about me.”

“G.O-ah, I'm sorry –“

“Don't. It's not your fault…”

“Mom, I'll call you back.”

She ends her conversation with her mom and places the phone on the table, not looking at G.O who was probably heart broken from her words earlier. He steps away from the door and sits next to her, while she was looking down at her hands, placed on the table.

He places his hands on hers making her look at him. She could feel the warmth from his hands through hers and it did something to her heart. She missed this, feeling his touch on her skin.

Since the incident, nothing happened between them. No kisses, nothing. He would just lie in her bed by her side and hug her, making sure she would sleep well. She doesn't know why he did this, at least he was still close to her and that's all she needed. But looking at his eyes, she knew that something was different. The way he was looking at her was telling her that he was in pain, and she somehow knew the reason.

“Let him go. Please, I beg you.”

She looked at him, shocked at his statement. She never thought he would be asking her something like this when he was the reason she was like this in the first place.

“Why are you asking me something like this?”

“Because I hate it that's why.”

“G.O-ah, I don't understand-“

“It's because of him if you're like this, and I can't stand to see you like this, crying every night hoping to have him back.”

“What differences does it make if I move on or not? You're not even suppose to care-”

“Don't tell me that, please. Why do you think I stick around? I care about you, more than you could ever imagine.”

“Don’t… Please.”

She lets go of his grip and walks out to the living room where he follows her. She stops in her tracks not sure on what to do next. He stops right behind her, wanting to confess everything he's been holding inside.

“Not G.O, but Byunghee. When you say that name, I want you to think of me. It hurts so much seeing you like this while crying someone else's name when I'm the one that's here, right by your side. It pains me to think that I'll never properly belong to you because you'll always have that someone else in your heart. That someone who drove you insane; that someone who couldn't care less of what you're going through; that someone who put you through hell by leaving you alone. Stop thinking about him and start thinking about me. Stop loving him and only love me. Can't you see? Don't you know how I feel about you? Don't you know that I want to wake up every morning by your side without worrying that you'll wish to be in his arms and not mine? Don't you know how much my heart hurts? I need you Seonyul-ah. You're the only person I've ever loved, the only one that I want. Don't let me love alone, please…”

“I don't know if I can. You heard me earlier G.O, I don't want to let go –“

“Look at me.”

She turns around to face him, only being at an arm length distance.

He was desperate to hear her say how much she wanted him because it was him and not someone else. Her heart was hurting seeing him like this. She wanted to respond to his feelings but something inside stopped her. She wasn't sure of what she was feeling at the moment, but something in her heart was crying out to him. She left him standing as she went up the stairs and changed into some better clothes.

Going back down, G.O was sitting on the couch, his hands brought up to cover his face. He heard her steps and looked up only to see her rushing through the front door.

“Where are you going?”

“Out.”

“I know that, but where? Let me come with you-”

“No, just stay, I'll come back… I just need some time alone.”

“Dahlia-”

“G.O, I'm coming back, I just want to be alone. I need to think some things through, I'll call you if there's anything, I promise.”

She left before he had time to answer.

He left out a frustrated sigh and walked back upstairs to her room, thinking over about what happened today.