Tried to Walk

30 Day IPod Shuffle Challenge for YoonHae (FAILED)

Song: http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=IxLV7M1sdjg


 

I glanced at the picture sitting by my side, wondering on whether I should get rid of it. It's been a couple days since I've broken off with her.

 

Why did I leave her picture there? Why did I want to see her smiling face so badly? Why didn't I forget her as quickly as I wanted to?

 

In frustration, I grabbed the photo and threw it against the wall, the glass of the frame shattering and the whole thing to crash down in my eyes. I crawled over to the remains of the frame and the picture that still remained connected and let tears sting my eyes and roll down my cheeks. I tried to grab the broken frame, but was cut from a small piece of glass. I couldn't touch her face, her smiling face. 

 

Ignoring the cuts forming on my hand and the blood seeping out, I attempted to grab the photo. I stained the edges of the photo with my blood, but I could care less. Questions ran through my head.

 

Should I throw this away? Should I keep the last picture I have of her in my reach? Wasn't I supposed to forget her?

 

Realization dawned upon me. I was supposed to forget her. That also meant that I had to get rid of everything that reminds me of her, all our memories. 

 

I gulped and stood up with the last memory I had to get rid of. I trudged over to the paper shredder and took one last look at her face. Those eyes glanced back at me with such warmth, and her soft pink lips etched in to a graceful smile. I couldn't look at it anymore. It keeps hurting me.

 

I pressed the button and let the machine do its work, watching her beautiful face get torn apart until it was nothing. That was it.

 

I got rid of her physically. It was a matter of time before I will be able to erase her image away from my mind.

 

On my way back from leaving you
I’ll forget you, I’ll erase you, my burnt and blackened love

 

My eyes failed to close that night and my mind was blank of everything

 

except for her.

 

----

 

I remember how I broke up with her. It was when I was cheating on her with Sunye. I never planned to cheat on her, but then again, you don't get to choose who and when you can love someone. 

 

"D-Donghae? W-What? Please tell me that you're joking. You're not being funny right now," she stuttered, her eyes glazed. I couldn't look at her face. I expected myself to feel neutral since I had Sunye who I believed was better. Why did I feel so hurt? 

 

I still kept my promise to Sunye. I need to break up with Yoona.

 

"You heard me exactly. I want to break up with you. Now." Her face fell and a single fear slipped away from her eye rolling down her cheek.

 

I couldn't look at her in the eyes. I couldn't find the courage to once again see her heart breaking one by one.

 

Don’t make that face, this is my last conversation with you
 
 
"D-Donghae please. Please don't do this to me. What did I do wrong? W-What can I do to change. Please. I'll do anything, just please don't break up with me." I held back the sting in my eyes and turned away from her pleads.
 
 
"Don't keep clinging on to me. You're bound to find a better guy than me." I was about to walk away, but her voice, which was choked with sobs, stopped me.
 
 
Don’t be disappointed – yes, don’t meet a guy like me now
 
 
"You're wrong Donghae... You may have not been my first, but I know you'll be my last. Please Donghae, don't leave me." I felt my heart break in two. Her words cut deep in to my mind and made me lose the control of my tears. I turned away before she could see, my voice shaking violently.
 
 
"Goodbye Yoona shhi." Formal speech was back again. I ran off before she could respond, and didn't stop when she screamed my name aloud, her voice completely broken.
 
 
I’ll be on my way first
 
 
------
 
 
I should've trusted the weird feeling I felt in my heart when I was about to break it off. Unsurprisingly, Sunye broke up with me only two days after I stopped my relationship with Yoona. It turned out that she was only using me to get a guy and was merely 'joking' about breaking up with me if I didn't cut ties with Yoona.
 
 
I admit that I felt hurt at first when Sunye cheated on me, but I realized that I was no different than she was. I cheated on her, I broke her heart, and I left her to cry on the street. The only difference between us is that I still loved Yoona. I still had feelings for her when I broken everything with her. I loved her the whole time, and I don't understand how I would do something like that.
 
 
Although I would want to turn back time, I couldn't. After I walked away, I never saw her chase me anymore. I lost all contact, and the more days that go by, the father and father we were drifting apart.
 
 
I’m getting farther away from you, you’re disappearing
 
 
I regret it all. I regret cheating on her. I regret breaking up. I regret everything. If I could turn back time to when we were happily together, I would keep those moments going on forever.
 
 
All I could do now is cry with my bloodied hands and pray that she won't completely forget me forever.
 
 
Don’t easily forget me, because it’ll hurt too much
 
 
The days passed by so slowly, and I was alone everyday. Her presence was never there anymore. I never saw her again.
 
 
I’m walking on these streets without you
I’m walking on these streets without you
 
 
-------
 
 
Hey guys. Sorry the update was late. I was hanging out with a friend and I totally forgot about this until my friend mentioned the Internet.
 
So sorry.
 
Well I did a song with B1A4. To tell you the truth, that is the only song that I know from them. It's a good song though, so I'll check them out later ^^;;
 
I really want to have another angsty song at the moment. I'm just in the mood to make people cry (that sounds mean).
 
Well I'm off! Comment an Subscribe.
 

 

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ChocoCaramel #1
Chapter 1: awww poor donghae :(
nerdscandy #2
Chapter 29: And thank you for writing all of those <3 I really loved them, and especially because YOONHAE was in them
nerdscandy #3
Chapter 29: Aww :( It's alright, but you probably did a lot more than you expected I hope? :D
There's always a next time
nerdscandy #4
Chapter 28: Nice sequel! :D Finally a sequel
nerdscandy #5
Chapter 27: Dang this one is sooooo mysterious and the plot was really unexpected
I think you have a sequel in mind? :)
nerdscandy #6
Chapter 26: Why is fate so cruel to them? I hope they can get together soon!
iamagirl_
#7
Chapter 26: This is sooooo...beautiful :')
nerdscandy #8
Chapter 25: Ahaha OMG they are so adorable <3
Hehe I loved how you portrayed yoona's thoughts
But I also wanna read donghae's thoughts. However, you didn't write them out and that left a sense of mystery and suspense, which was also really intriguing.
LilyLOL
#9
Chapter 13: Good chapter! You have to listen them song such as beautiful target, only learned bad things, or baby I'm sorry, it will inspire you, seriously Author-nim :D
nerdscandy #10
Chapter 24: Danggg I thought they were going to break up, but then they didn't! OMG the ending <3 <3 <3