On Monday morning Kris got up early and called in sick. He didn’t want to go to work and he didn’t feel like being crammed into a cubical for 8 hours. He told his boss he had gotten sick over the weekend from going camping. His boss understood and told him he could have the rest of the week off since even over the phone Kris sounded so sad which made him sound sick. He then thanked his boss for understanding and hung up the phone. He didn’t know what to do. He felt alone. He wanted to call Tao and ask him to go to his house to spend the day but he remembered their fight. He then felt even more alone. He wanted to go home, but he remembered Luhans words. He felt pathetic. He had nowhere to go. It was too early to go visit Chanyeol so he decided just to go back to sleep. The only problem with that was that he couldn’t fall asleep. Not after his mind was racing with images of an angry Tao and of Luhans eyes from the morning before.

            Kris moved around his apartment at a sluggish pace. He seemed to be moving as if he were put in slow motion. He cleaned up his apartment and did some laundry. He felt completely exhausted from doing just that. He decided to have another bath before he left to visit Chanyeol. This time he stayed in the bath till his hands and feet had become wrinkled and prune like. He then got out of the bath and slowly began to dry himself. When he was done dressing himself he went to retrieve his keys from the jacket he had worn the day before. He also found his phone in the pocket. He saw that the light was blinking indicating that his phone was close to death.

            Kris thought to himself “wouldn’t it be nice to die when you want and then revive whenever you felt like it.” He wanted to escape the world. Even if just for a little bit. He just wanted everything to stop and just let him sleep for days with no worries. He didn’t want to worry about having to shower, clean, eat, or anything. He just wanted to be in a dark hole by himself and just sleep till everything was okay. He wanted for death to come to him. Death is just and illusion; the lie of life in matter. He didn’t want to matter. He wanted to be an illusion and just disappear.

            Kris charged his phone and waited till it rebooted. When it was halfway charged he unplugged it in a sluggish manner and went out the door. He decided to walk to Chanyeols grave. It was a fairly long walk but he had the whole week off. He didn’t have to report to work so he chose the slower and more depressing route. He plugged his headphones in and put it on his depressing music. He didn’t want to listen to anything that had to do with being happy; it would only give him false hope.

            When he finally reached the cemetery the man at the gate just let him in recognizing him from the day before. He didn’t say anything. He just let him pass. But when Kris walked by the man, the man stretched out his arm and patted Kris on the back as a comforting gesture. Kris really appreciated that simple gesture. It wasn’t much but it was still something and it was warmth that climbed through Kris. Right when Kris was about to leave the man voiced out, “Your brother must’ve been an amazing person if you come visit him so often. I clean his grave more than the others. I know he’s watching over you. Don’t worry, he’ll always be there for you even if you can’t come.”            Kris was taken aback a little by the mans’ words. He was indeed grateful though. He knew that Chanyeol was always with him but it was reassuring for him to hear it from someone else.

            He stayed at the cemetery the rest of the day. He didn’t move much from his spot on the grass next to Chanyeols grave. People passed by mostly near the end of the day. He was quiet most of the day, except for very few words that were said to Chanyeol. Kris’ mother called him but he didn’t answer the phone. He thought it was pointless. He was pointless.

            Meanwhile Kris was sulking the whole day Tao had spent the whole day with Luhan and his other friends. Just like how Luhan had promised he picked him up before lunch and they all went to a restaurant to eat lunch together. While they were in the restaurant everyone was talking about how much has changed in the time that Tao was gone from China. Chen had gotten a girlfriend and they had been dating seriously for quite some time. Lay also had a girlfriend but their relationship wasn’t as serious. Xiumin had decided to not only continue with college but take on a second major in language. Luhan had stuck with just being who he was, the rich guy that would eventually take over his fathers business.

            Tao had told them all of what Kris’ parents had done for him and how grateful he was to them. He also told them some things about Chanyeol. He of course left out the part that Kris had felt to be at fault for Chanyeols suicide. He left out pretty much everything aside from that he had committed suicide when he was fifteen.  He shared everything with his friends that he could. He left out some parts of his days with Kris and them just going out or staying in and being together. He didn’t talk much about Kris, mainly because of what had happened the night before. He answered the questions that his friends had asked him about Kris as well. Most of his answers were long and very elaborate but when the topic was Kris his answers would be short.

            The next part of the day was spent at the mall going from shop to shop trying on clothes, taking pictures, talking, and eating. When they had gone into nearly every single store in the mall they decided to take a break and sit down. Xiumin and Chen ran off to get everyone some ice cream while the others just sat at a bench talking.

            Tao had been happy the whole day till his friends said they wanted to go watch a movie but Luhan and him didn’t want to watch it. They split up and decided that the other three would get the car for when they were done and Luhan and Tao would just walk around and they would meet up at the hotel at night.

            Once the other three were out of sight the first thing that Luhan did was grab Taos hand. He intertwined their fingers and held his hand tight. At first Tao was a little surprised and tense up but he relaxed not long after. Luhan took him to another shop and made Tao try on an outfit that he had picked. Tao asked why he needed to try out the outfit in which Luhan retorted with “it’s for our date tomorrow.” Tao was shocked to say the least. Not once did they ever say that they were dating or that he would go on a date with Luhan. He was skeptical but went to the dressing room and changed. When he was done changing he went out to see Luhan waiting for him on a couch that was placed in front of the dressing rooms.

“You look amazing.”

“Thanks. But why does it have to be so fancy?”

“Well I have to treat my boyfriend to a nice dinner don’t you think?”

“Well, I… I … I ..-“

“It’s okay you don’t have to say anything. Do you like it or do you want to try on something else?”

“This is fine.”

“Alright then we’ll take it.”

            Tao was stunned at how Luhan had addressed him as his boyfriend. After Luhan had declared him his boyfriend Tao zoned out. He wondered what his parents would think. He thought of Kris and wondered what he thought about it. He went back into the dressing room and changed back into his normal clothes.

            Once they were done shopping they took a cab to Taos home and Luhan dropped him off there and promised to pick him up in the evening so they could go to dinner. Tao merely nodded not knowing what else to do. Luhan walked Tao to the door and gave him another kiss which Tao responded to. Then Tao went inside his house and Luhan went back into the cab and asked the driver to take him to the hotel.

            Once Tao was safe in his room he got a change of clothes and went to take a shower. He thought of all the things that had happened throughout the day. But mostly he missed Kris. They’d only been apart for a day and yet Tao was longing for his the sound of his voice. Tao missed Kris. He missed him dearly. He was still mad at him for what he said about Luhan but he still missed him. He didn’t realize that he was standing in the shower crying. He cried because of what he had said to Kris the night before. His words were so harsh. He wanted to see Kris so bad.

             Tao had made up his mind after he took a shower he got into a new change of clothes and headed out. His mother stopped him though, asking him where he was headed to. He simply told her he was going to see Kris since he had spent the day with his friends and he still wanted to see Kris. His mother smiled. She suggested that he take another change of clothes just in case if it got too late that he just stay there. He agreed and went back up to his room and got a spare change of clothes.

            Again he went down the stairs and to the door only this time he only heard a soft goodbye from his parents. He bid his parents a goodbye and went on his way to Kris’ apartment. He walked there since he still needed to think of what to talk about with Kris. He wanted to make things right again. He wanted to apologize to Kris yet he still wanted and apology from Kris about his assumption about his friends – and his now apparent boyfriend. When Tao reached Kris’ apartment he was about to knock on the door but saw that all the light were off so he got out his key to open the door and was surprised  to see that Kris wasn’t home from work yet.

            He waited there for what seemed to be forever until he heard footsteps outside of the door. He got up to greet Kris in coming home but was surprised to hear a nocking at the door instead of the  door opening. 

hey guys, well this update is up early in the morning since i didn't have school today and i've actually been working on it for the past 2 days fro about  30-40 minute spans and this morning i just finished it. i hope you enjoy this chapter. i'm sorry about the sad depressed Kris throughout the chapter. i mean he can't possibly be happy after what happened. i know i wouldn't be able to be happy after something like that happened to me.

i know luhan isn't all that great of a person in this story but just to make reasure you i really do love luhan but Tao is still my bias.

hey any BABYZ out there. did you guys see the teaser? OMG i cried. my babies are badass again. i mean i loved the cute-ish concept they had for Hajima but really i love B.A.P as badasses more.

and the Nu'est had their teaser come out and i'm just dying.

and then SHINee's having a comeback to T.T

i swear my heart can't take so many comebacks this month. i'm going to die and my grades are going to drop so bad.

anyways comment if you liked it or not. tell me about my spelling and grammer mistakes if you see any and i'll try and fix them.