Kai’s POV

The school bell rings, waking me up from my nap. My eyes open, squinting as the daylight reaches my pupils. With much effort, I lift up my head from my arms that were sprawled over the desk, scratching a small itch at the back of my neck as I let out a big yawn. I look up taking slow long blinks, allowing my eyes to adjust to the brightness.

“Ok class, please finish off page 56 in your workbooks for next lesson.”

The teacher looks around the class, eyeing all the students before his eyes lands on me. I raise my eyebrows at him as our eyes meet and scoffed.

Pfft…homework. I would have thought that after teaching me for the past year, he would know by now how much I actually participate in his forever boring maths lessons. Homework? I applause his great expectations.

After that one second of eye contact, I turn my attention away to the window, smirking as I picture him sighing at me whilst shaking his head in disapproval.

I boredly look out the window separating the classroom from the corridor, on my right, with my chin resting on my right hand as I propped up my right elbow on the desk.

A familiar looking girl gracefully walks past, hugging her books closely to her chest. The time suddenly seems to have dramatically slowed down in my vision as I watch her flowing long waves elegantly bounce with her every movement. Her every step was light and elegant. Her eyes curves into pleasant crescent shapes, as she happily laughs, delicate dimples discreetly shows itself on those youthful rosy red cheeks. That smile…is so stunning, so radiant and bright, so uniquely special…just like her.

The smirk on my lips has long disappeared as I observe her every action. Be it physically in front of me or in my mind, my heart is flooded with mixed emotions everytime she appears…feelings of guilt, disappointment, longing, yet a strong wave of a bittersweet feeling washes over me everytime that smiles appears on her angelic face. I could have been the one standing right next to her, the one making her laugh, the one she will be sweetly laughing for, the one who is able to watch these small precious moments up close…but I blew it…I blew the best chance I’ll ever get to be with her

I sit still in the same position, she has long left my sight, but I could still hear her sweet melodic laugh and see her repeatedly walking by with her smooth rhythmic steps.

A fist knocks on the transparent surface in front of my face, bringing me back to reality. I look up to see two clowns pulling funny faces on the other side of the window. Chuckling at the sight of Baekhyun and Chanyeol, I looked around the class. It appears that everyone has already left, which made me wonder how long did I spend trapping myself in my thoughts. I got up from my seat, lazily slinging my bag over my shoulder and walked out to meet these idiots.

The moment I stepped out of the class, Chanyeol slung his arm around my shoulder.

“So…someone seemed to have been deep in thought”

I blankly looked at him and slowly blinked a few times, unamused. Baekhyun suddenly slung his arm around my shoulder as well from the other side trapping me in between the two of them.

“Come on! We wouldn’t want D.O umma and Suho appa to be waiting now would we?”

I gave him an are-you-serious look and sighed as the two idiots excitedly dragged me along towards the locker area where D.O and Suho hyung were stood chatting. D.O managed to notice us first and stopped talking in mid sentence as I was dragged along like I was forced to participate in an circus act. Suho hyung followed D.O’s eyes and turned around, his eyes widens as he gives the three of us teasingly judging looks. Chanyeol and Baekhyun responded with wide grins plastered on their faces whilst I didn’t appear to show any enthusiasm at all. Suho hyung and D.O shared some sort of eye contact before they bursted out laughing at their three ‘children’.

Baekyeol (A/N: Can’t be bothered continuously typing both their names haha) pouted as I smacked their arms off me and looked around.

“Where’s Sehun?”

As always the two troublemakers had to speak up.

“Today’s Wednesday”

Chanyeol explained in a mocking tone, his troublemaker buddy swiftly took over.

“And Wednesday’s bubble tea day”

He said in attempt to imitate the maknae. Like the crazy idiots they are, they laughed at their own little imitation of Sehun, high fiving each other whilst I rolled my eyes at them.

Just when I thought they finished speaking, Baekhyun decided to give me some additional unnecessary information about the maknae’s whereabouts.

“Which means that he’s with Hye-“

I notice D.O and Suho send him a stern look, making him shut up. D.O turned to me, trying to change the topic.

“We’re gonna stop by the Ddeokbokki stand, you coming?”

Baekyeol’s eyes gleamed in happiness at the sound of food. I checked my phone for the time.

“I can’t, sorry…got dance practice…just go without me”

Chanyeol looked at me in disapproval

“Gosh…just go back to clubbing, don’t you miss it?”

Baekhyun nodded in agreement

“Yeh, just picture all those girls…”

Suho hyung glared at the two of them again.

“Ok then, we’ll see you at home then”

He smiled at me, before he and D.O each grabbed one of the troublemakers and dragged them away by the arm. I watched as Baekyeol turned back to me with Suho hyung and D.O’s hands still firmly gripped onto their arms.

“Bye Kai!”

“Seeya!”

Once I could no longer see them in the distance, I sighed and started to make my way to the dance studio.

On my way there, I would always go pass that same park where she broke up with me. Everyday I walk past it and everyday I would remind myself of that day, I’ll never be able to forgive myself for letting her go.

For some unknown reason, I had the strong yet reluctant desire to enter the park today, the park where I would usually just stare at in torment. My feet feels heavy as I step in for the first time since the break up…seven months has already slowly gone by.

Like it had a mind of its own, my feet automatically took me to the swings. My body didn’t feel like my own as it completely took control of itself. I watch as my hand reaches out to one of the chains of the swing, the swing where she sat at…that evening when I first confessed to her.

The wind softly blows against my face bringing in the vivid scent of her fragrance. The sweet floral fruity scent that I could smell as I hugged her that evening…I still remember it so clearly…the tense atmosphere that engulfed this entire park that night, the tears from her crying face, all that contradicted the bright, fresh beachy scent. It was that scent that made everything feel so unreal…even now. It was that contradictory scent that has imprinted an everlasting memory in this corrupted heart.

Feeling all this pent up emotions build up, getting heavier and heavier as I recall everything, I took one last glance at my surroundings and made my way into the world of my own. A world where these feelings can be released, the world where only me and the music exists, the world where only music can pull me out of my misery. The dance studio.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

With a flick of the two switches, one by one the florescent tube lights behind the frosted glass panels on the ceiling lit up as the light travelled down the studio. The studio appears to be like a large black box, with black sound proof sponge covering three sides of the studio and dark wooden floorboards laid across the spacious floor. At the front of the room, a large mirror spreads across the whole wall. Once you walk into the studio, there is a large stereo system placed at an angle in the front right hand corner.

I look around this empty space. It’s been so long since I started coming here. It felt so different from staying at clubs all the time. Instead of getting drunk and getting squashed together dancing with a load of unknown girls I can actually be at peace. It felt nice. If only I was able to find this place much earlier, I wouldn’t have so much regrets right now. My one and only decent relationship wouldn’t have got ruined and she wouldn’t have left me.

Never have I been so thankful towards that sunbae who recommended me to come here. That sunbae who owned the studio and entrusted me with a spare key, allowing me to come here whenever I wanted.

Who would have thought that, that playboy from the past would find so much more enjoyment in this isolation?

Not bothering to change into my extra set of clothes I brought with me, I undone my tie and took off my blazer. As I got to the stereo system, I threw the tie and blazer beside it. All I want and need now is to release all these feelings, all these emotions.  

Grabbing a CD from my bag I inserted in and played the music, chucking my bag onto my blazer. As the music started to blast out from the speakers, my body naturally moved along to the beats and I was slowly getting absorbed into the world it created.

(A/N: You don’t have to listen to the music, I just wanted to give you a better idea of what songs he could have been listening to…I don’t even know how he could dance to them lol)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Dnab1eUe0fk

My body follows the slow music which slowly builds up and my mind uncontrollably thinks back to those times. I recall the time, where I first paid attention her…Yoo Hyeyi. That quiet girl with a seemingly mature attitude, the one who turned out to be the only person who childishly laughed at a teacher tripping over his own foot in detention. I smile throughout my dance as I remember her doodles of sweets all over her notebook, remember her giddiness whenever she ate the cake from the school’s canteen, remember that laughing face that I hated myself for not noticing earlier.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tfBJY7j65io

The music moved onto a more upbeat song. Without stopping I continue to dance and think back to when I first placed that packet of fruit rocks in her locker and watched as she happily took it without the slightest hint of suspicion.  For a whole week, I secretly gave her different types of sweets everyday…bon bons, cola cubes, rhubarb and custards…and for the first time I felt nervous at the thought of confessing to someone as I placed that large swirls lollipop in her locker along with a little note.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BpuuVyaQQbs

How we met up at that same park, how shocked she was to see me. When she accidently smudged ice cream on her own face…how fast my heart was beating as I leaned in, cleaning it off for her. Her slow yet cute reaction when I told her I gave her those sweets.

She was the first girl who was in such a rush to leave me despite being able to spend some time with a kingka on her own. She’s so different from other girls. I still remember how much I panicked when I thought she would run off before I was able confess. How anxious I was as I waited for her answer…hoping I would see her at that park again.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EYcTitZX55s

That next day I was so surprised when I saw a familiar figure standing by the swings. My body just exploded with happiness. And from that point on, I just found myself falling deeper for that one girl.

I missed those times…where I had someone who could just listen to me all day without any complaints, someone who I felt completely comfortable with, someone I could place all my trust in. I missed the times when I no longer had to watch her from afar but see her smile and laugh up close. When I could and she would respond by playfully hitting me. When we would walk home together…

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H-6YLi9p5gM

But in the end it was my entire fault it got to this point. The amount of precious tears she must have wasted on me. How insecure she must have felt, whilst I was laughing away in the clubs. Despite knowing this, I still selfishly wish for her to be here with me, to have her in my arms again…those tears, that slap, those eyes that reflected pain and resentment.

I drop to floor, feeling my soaked through shirt sticking to my skin. My whole body feels like its burning up. I heavily breathe; my chest constantly rises up as I lie on the floor looking up at the light.

Covering my eyes with my right arm, I remember those dreadful lines of Suho hyung’s wise advice that continues to haunt me.

“You know…sometimes you never realise how precious they are til they’re gone”

“Treasure her before it’s too late”

But it’s already ‘too late’, she’s already gone, she already left me…

…and I only have myself to blame.

A/N: HIIIi I kept my promise to have more of Kai lol...I don't think I ever did a Kai's POV before have I? I didn't think I could do a boy's POV that well hehe hope you enjoyed it :)