Dae Myung’s POV

Ever since I had let my infatuation slip through, I had tried suppressing it fully; seeing her so frightened of me made my whole body fill with regret. Seeing that same smile on her lips seemed more important than listening to the impulses of my heart.

Yet all I wanted to do was to tell her my feelings, to tell her how much she meant to me.

It’s a shame reason tells me that keeping it within is the best solution for now.

Days passed, soon followed by weeks. We had gone back to the tight, comfortable friendship we used to share.

A friendship where I was only an older brother in her eyes.

I tried to persuade myself things would be fine, that I could always protect her this way. But often reluctance accompanied me as I could only share this spot by her side as an older brother.

I wanted more than this title, this image.

I wanted her to see past this older brother impression.

I wanted her to see me as a potential lover.

And then it occurred to me that I had never been this way for a girl before.

But, for some reason, it seemed inevitable if I was to love someone as sweet and frail as Sang Hee.

And even now, as the exam sheet lay right in front of me on my desk, I couldn’t get her out of my thoughts. I only needed to look up to see her back facing me.

My exam sheet was almost completely filled; I had managed to concentrate on it for a decent amount of time. I had studied a bit during the past week to get a passing grade, even though it wasn’t enough to get full marks.

So as I was almost finished, I dared a look in front, even though I could get my exam sheet taken away at any moment for “copying”.

And there she was, lying her face down on her desk, her pencil set down in her right hand…

…

Wait, what?

How could she sleep during our midterm exams?!

I glanced at the clock. There were only fifteen minutes left to the exam. I wasn’t sure if she was finished with it, but knowing her, she’d never allow herself to sleep before it was over.

I had a feeling this was caused by her busy schedule: she had school Monday until Friday, work on Monday, Wednesday and Friday as well as piano practice the remaining two days.

I couldn’t help but feel a pang of guilt as I knew the reason she was working was me. I could never dissuade her from quitting though.

I slightly kicked one of the feet of her chair slightly, trying not to make any sound.

She slid further a bit, without waking up.

I swear, Sang Hee, you were always such a deep sleeper.

I tried again, this time a bit harder.

She slightly shifted in her sleep before slowly pulling herself up. She rubbed her temples slowly, as if trying to recollect herself.

I guessed it was a good sign she wasn't acting too worried. She must’ve finished her exam since she was so relaxed now.

She soon gasped in a low voice, before taking a hold of her pencil and writing on her sheet furiously.

Or not.

A slight smile appeared on my lips as I shook my head amusedly before concentrating on my own sheet.

Sang Hee will always stay the sweet and clumsy dork I’d fallen for. I guess nothing really had changed between us, has it?

I guess I should be glad.

Mood Song: A Thousand Miles - Vanessa Carlton

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Sg0CeRog-yQ

“I can’t believe I fell asleep…!” Sang Hee sighed with complete desperation as we exited the school grounds.

“I’m sure you did well. You always do.” I replied with a reassuring smile.

I was serious too. She always did well on exams.

“I didn’t know most of the answers though…! I couldn’t study because I came back home too late yesterday after work…” she said in a depressed manner.

I knew it.

It was all because she wanted to pay for my training fees; how could I listen to her without attempting to dissuade her once more from working? It was a good thing the cupcake bakery was closed today, so she could go home and rest.

“You don’t have to work anymore, Sang Hee. I can manage working by myself.” I said sadly, feeling guilty for making her work for my sake.

She stopped in her tracks; I stopped as well and turned to look at her, slightly surprised by her sudden halt. She shook her head and I could see the fire of determination burning in her pupils.

“Dae Myung, I want you to train, to reach out for your dreams. You got accepted in SM as a trainee! You can’t just let it go like that…” she smiled in a caring manner. The same manner that reminded me every time of the reason why I loved her.

“I know you’ll be an amazing idol. As a fangirl, I know exactly what fans would like. And you have all the right qualities! I know you can make it, Dae Myung. I truly, truly, truly believe it.”

If I could, I would’ve wrapped my arms around her waist, gazing into her gleaming eyes, before kissing her soft and tender lips, this intoxicating feeling straining my chest.

If only I could.

A smirk soon took a hold of my lips as I slightly tilted my head to the side. “Does that mean you think I’m handsome?”

She tilted her head as well, thinking her words over. The shadow of a smile soon appeared as she straightened her head.

“I guess I do! You look a bit like an ulzzang too. I feel so stupid for not have paid more attention before though!” she said in a light-hearted laugh.

I had always wanted her to say I was handsome, but somehow, it felt like I wanted more than this answer. She soon started walking, continuing on the sidewalk. I did so as well, pacing by her side.

I guess it was better than nothing though.

A few cars passed by us anonymously, the sound of a motor roaring. As city residents, we were more than used to it; I wondered how country-side people would feel here though.

A few shops displayed some goods in their windows. Some had a wide range of colorful clothes in them, waiting for a customer to adopt them. Others had food sprawled in a tempting order. None of them caught our eye anymore though, seeing how we passed by them five days on seven.

A bus stop soon appeared in our field of view.

Sang Hee looked behind her. “The bus is coming. Let’s take it.”

I looked at her with surprise. We never took the bus after school, even if it was raining. It was really unusual for her to ask something like this.

Somehow, I had a feeling it had something to do with the very same reason that made her fall asleep during our exam.

“Wae? Are you tired?” I asked, concerned.

She smiled, feeling a bit embarrassed by her demand. “Yeah… Is it okay with you?”

“Of course. Come on, let’s get to the bus stop.”

I hesitated for about a second, but I decided to go with my impulse. I took her by the hand and led her to the bus stop. Her hand was as soft as it looked; I couldn’t help but tighten my hold as I felt slight giddiness appear.

It was the moments like these that made all the pain of a one-sided love fade away. It was the moments like these that made love worth the trouble.

As the bus arrived, we got on and paid the 1000 won needed each. There were a few people in the bus but, luckily, there were two seats right by the window in the back. We made our way there and sat; I let her sit by the window.

The bus soon departed, making the landscape pass by us.

Sang Hee was unusually silent, staring out the window. I knew it was because she was tired, so I didn’t say anything to give her the alone time she needed.

I stared ahead, watching the bus driver steer at a curve. I then led my gaze to the various people sitting in the bus. I noticed among the passengers a mother with two young toddlers. She had one of them seated on her while the other was sitting by her side.

Although they were young, they were really calm and silent. Their mother showed them a few buildings, whispering the names in a patient, caring voice. They listened attentively, repeating the words.

I immediately missed Chung Hee and Kang Dae, wondering if Umma had already picked them up or not. Ever since I was too busy to bring them home, she volunteered to take an hour off to pick them up.

It’s really odd to miss someone when you just saw them in the morning, but I guess it just showed how much I loved them.

A slight pressure on my shoulder drove me out of my thoughts. I looked on the side, wondering what this was. As my cheek brushed her soft hair, I immediately smiled.

She must’ve been really tired to fall asleep on me.

Well, not like I mind though.

It felt like my smile would never fade away, that this happiness residing in my thoughts would never go away.

And somehow, life seemed so simple with her by my side. I could manage passing through anything life would throw at me if I had her by my side.

Ironically, I knew this feeling of being happy forever wasn’t going to last. I knew love was making me feel this way. I knew there was going to be a point when I’d have to run right into the wall of reality.

But I still couldn’t help but indulge myself in this ephemeral joy.

As I noticed it was soon our stop, I rested my head against hers, hearing her soft breathing against me.

The bus halted at our stop.

The mother led her two toddlers down the bus; they followed obediently. I could’ve woken Sang Hee up, so that we’d get home like we had intended. So that she'd go home and rest.

But the doors soon closed; the bus departed once more.

I brought my arm around her protectively, possessively. My smile grew as I could feel my heart swell with light happiness.

Maybe for just a little longer…

It's better really if she rested with me instead.

Sang Hee’s POV

I failed another exam today.

I had always studied obediently, persistently in the past years, but these past days, I didn’t even have the time to do my homework or study at all.

I should’ve though, since these were the midterms…

The thought of my parents’ reaction immediately made fear emanate from my heart.

I shivered both out of fear and cold as I stood up to close the window. The leaves made a rustling sound, startled by the October wind; there was no sunset this time, as autumn clouds shrouded the sky.

It was Thursday; I was in my practice room, not practicing unfortunately though. I tried to cram in all the information of the notes in front of me on Mathematics, but the more I read, the more I got confused.

And the more I tried to do my exercises, the more I realized I didn’t know my subject.

Which made my esteem for tomorrow’s last midterm test drop to a real low.

I found it amazing how Dae Myung still managed to be so confident when it comes to exams, even now. Although he wasn’t one of the top students, he still managed to have decent marks. Even with his crammed schedule, he didn’t seem afraid or stressed at all before attacking the exam sheet.

Guided by my questioning, my mind soon wandered off, fleeing the notes in front of me.

After I had woken up yesterday in the bus, I realized we were at the last stop and that Dae Myung hadn’t woken me up. We had to walk across the street and take the same bus in the opposite direction. I got slightly mad at him for not warning me, but I guess it just faded away as I noticed he seemed pretty happy for some reason.

I hadn’t seen him act scary or odd like that one time in the elevator before anymore; things just replaced themselves, as if nothing had ever happened.

To be honest, I was glad that they returned to normal. I was reluctant to face whatever could be lying under those smiles, that cheerfulness. I wanted to help him, but it didn’t feel right to bother him about it.

When he’ll be ready to tell me, he will.

Because I know I’ll always be there for him.

…

As I realized I had once again been distracted, I groaned out of frustration and put down my pencil. I rubbed my temples in an attempt to clear my mind but, seeing how it didn’t work, I lied down on my desk, over the math sheet.

I could feel the weight of exhaustion hang over my eyelids, pulling them down. I decided to give in for just a few seconds.

It was a nice feeling, to let your eyes rest and your mind have one less sense to take care of.

But as I tried reopening them, my eyelids would soon close as if lead was pulling them down. I tried to fight this a few more times, but to no avail.

Seeing as how I could deserve the rest, I decided to stay this way for just a little longer.

Jonghyun’s POV

As I saw her practice room, I didn’t halt like I would’ve a few weeks ago. She knew I was visiting everyday she was practicing; our relationship had evolved to a comfortable level. I acted just like I would with a friend with her. She did too; I find myself wondering if she acts this way with Dae Myung at times.

I took a hold of the doorknob and pushed the door, a wide smile on my lips.

“Hey Sang He-” I started before stopping myself from saying more.

She was lying down on her desk just like that one time before. This time though, I had given away my entrance with a few reckless words. She didn’t bulge though.

Was she really sleeping?

If she was awake, she would’ve gotten up after hearing me.

I closed the door behind me and approached her with silent footsteps. I could soon discern her math homework under her as well as her soft-looking face. Her eyelids were closed and she breathed evenly.

She had told me how she was working a few days with Dae Myung to help him pay his tuition fees and how the rest of the weekdays were spent here practicing.

I guess her schedule had finally gotten the best of her.

I sat down on the piano bench without making a sound, gazing at her innocent, sleeping image. I found it odd how the more time I spent with her, the more she seemed pretty. Usually, it was the contrary: the more I spent time with any particular girl, even the idols, the more I found her features to be plain.

I wondered if she had some guys after her, at school. Of course, I had a feeling Dae Myung liked her, but there had to be other guys after her.

She wasn’t superficial or annoyingly loud. Her looks were soft and charming for the eyes. She had a rather gentle and innocent image. As for her personality, it was soothing and calm, perked with kindness and fragility.

It seemed impossible to me that there would be no one after her.

If she hadn’t mentioned anything to me, it was probably because she was too oblivious to her surroundings when it comes to love.

Which made me feel slightly bad for Dae Myung.

But he got to spend time with her most of the week, so I guess it was pointless to feel this way.

Now that I thought about it, she never gave me any details about her school life. The only thing I knew was that she spent most of her time with Dae Myung.

Shouldn’t she have other friends though?

Or could it be that… she actually liked Dae Myung that way?

 Then again, she really seemed to mean it when she calls him her older brother.

Well, I guess I’ll ask her more some other time about school.

Talking about school though, wasn’t this the period for midterms?

I stood up and took a closer look at the math sheet under her. It was filled with half-completed equations and lots of question marks. Judging by the looks of it, she had difficulty understanding the problems.

I felt a surge of pity and endearment at the thought of her trying to study when she was so exhausted. I wanted her to succeed in everything she did; I knew she deserved the best.

I needed to help her as much as I could, even if it meant I had to wreck my brain with Mathematics.

So I stood over her, eyeing the equations. I took her pencil in my left hand and searched in the confines of my brain for any remaining memory of Mathematics.

As I realized I understood some of it, I immediately started writing down the answer, adding small notes on how and why she was supposed to develop it this way. Simple happiness swelled inside my heart as I realized I could help her in other domains than music.

I couldn’t concentrate long enough though after a few equations: I was soon distracted by her. I could hear her soft breathing under me as well as smell the soft scent of her cherry blossom shampoo. Her face displayed innocence and gentleness and her hair seemed soft to the touch.

And one thing particularly stood out to me.

Her lips of a pale rose color.

As I realized how weird it was to stare at her lips that way, I glanced back towards the equations. I couldn’t notice them in my mind anymore though.

I tried to finish the problems I could still see without her hiding it, but I soon realized it was pointless. I was too surprised and flushed by what just happened to continue.

I looked at the clock; it was time for me to leave anyways.

So I wrote her a small message in the upper left corner of her paper and gently put down her pencil. I gazed one last time at her with a half-embarrassed, half-concerned smile; she still seemed completely lost in her dreams. She really wasn’t going to wake up anytime soon, was she?

I walked out and closed the door behind me, feeling slightly weird. I couldn’t understand what made me stare at her lips.

Or, rather, I didn’t want to understand what made me stare at her lips.

Sang Hee’s POV

I regained sense of reality slowly, bit by bit.

As I realized I probably had slept more than I was supposed to, I sat up, my mind hazy and eyelids slightly heavy still.

I glanced at the clock; I was supposed to leave about thirty minutes ago.

Frustration immediately took a hold of me.

Pabo! Why did you let yourself fall asleep?!

Sadness soon made my heart sink as another thought occurred to me: I had missed Jonghyun. Seeing him was one of the moments I looked forward to the most during weekdays. I had just missed one of those moments.

I sighed loudly.

It wasn’t the time to be depressed. I had to study for tomorrow’s last midterm. It was my only chance to make my scores rise up to a reasonable average.

I took my pencil and put it in my pencil case then started gathering my papers when I saw them.

Marked answers under the equations I was just working on before.

It was a different handwriting from mine; I couldn’t come up with those answers anyways. I read them and noticed with joy that this person had written a few tips as well as explanations.

With these, my perspective of tomorrow’s exam immediately brightened up.

I soon noticed a small message in the corner of the sheet.

And this was when a giddy smile appeared on my lips and made my heart thud loudly.

“Sang Hee-ah~ You should rest a lot more. Seeing you sleep like that really makes me worried about your health! You have a midterm tomorrow, right? I hope these explanations will help you!

Do your best and make me proud!

Sang Hee hwaiting!

Jonghyun ~”

I hugged the paper against me, feeling a surge of hope and pure happiness make my heart soar.

Yeah, I’ll do my best if you encourage me like this!

Thank you… once again.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Update, finally! <3

I'm really sorry for taking so much longer... I've been drowning in exams. And still am, actually. LOL I have four exams next week and... I SHOULD be studying for them. But I really felt bad for not updating, so here it is!

I find it hilarious how I wrote about Mathematics. I just happened to be studying Math right before I continued and finished this chapter. -traumatised- LOL

Well, this was sort of a transitory chapter, because I can assure, the next chapter is where it really starts to escalate kekeke. <3

I had fun writing about Jonghyun's kinda embarassment~. It's so rare to write about a moment where he gets a bit flustered. xD

Anyways, I hope you guys will bear with my sluggish updating for now! Thank you so much for being patient and continuing to read!