Finally school is over...oh...i didnt meant over over,just vacations ,2 weeks so ,i have no idea how to spend them ,or neither what to do at home,alone. 

I think ill just draw ,or dance,or sing (or maybe cry ,or cut my wrist till they bleed as much blood as they can ) .

When it comes for winter ,its just as the devil is coming back from his vacations ,and he is bringing me a souvenir from hell ,that in this case ,its my thoughts,theres always something bad coming up my mind,i dont get it ,theres a dark voice in my mind,it reminds me of all the bad things ive been through in an instant ,like flashbacks.

But why in winter? Why not summer for example? 
I guess...i guess its the atmosphere itself ,freezing,cold , grey,i understand now ,the only thing i dont get its why me? 

SILLY STOP OVERTHINKING.

Its snowing outside now,mom is at Mr.Lee today ,i think im not used to the fact that they are dating each-other yet.

I got in the bed ,covered myself ,and start thinking ,deep thoughts,the same things as i said before ,shortly after,i felt asleep. 


______'s Dream:

Its dark .
I started walking ,even if i didnt really see where i put my feets ,i hear my footsteps ,like an echo ,then,i started running as fast as i could till i reached a bright light in the end of somewhere ,i kept hearing those voices,like screams ,they seemed to haunt me ,and a cold breeze came up to my spine ,they kept pulling me away of this light ,so weird ,but i was full conscious of what was going on ,i was just not able to move an inch ,i felt a pain through my stomach and chest ,a very sharp pain ,i looked down and founded blood,blood,everywhere , suddendly something woke me up,fortunately. 

I opened my eyes ,and realized i was crying, i quickly took a look to the side of my bed and gazed at my phone,who had already 3 missed calls. 
It rang again ,wiping my tears i saw it was Jjong . 

"H...hello?" 

"Yeobo ,we are coming to visit you now ,hope you dont mind,we have something to tell you!" he said ,he seemed so happy and cheered. 

"Kay ...but why "we"?" i said rubbing my eyes,kinda scared of what i excperienced moments before ,reaching up to the laptop.

"SHINee silly! Are you fine? I can tell by your voice something bad happened.." oh he knows me so well.

"No,nothing ,kay ,take your time to come ,byee!" i quickly hanged up before he could ask me to say the truth.

Reminding the nightmare ,i was terrified to get out my room ,even if it was day outside,i just couldnt keep my mind straight. 

----------

After 10 minutes of hiding behind the couch the bell rang and i rushed to open the door ,breathing heavily. 

"He-" Onew said ,but he couldnt finish the greeting cuz of me pulling them inside one by one and closing the door shut,I rested on the wall and gazed at their confused faces. 

"Noona w-what happened?" Taemin asked taking off the jacket. 

"I-im just scared ,please dont leave me alone ,please." i said and dropped down on the floor,i was in shock,from all the nightmares that i had ,this was the only one that i could feel,and i could say i was there for real. 

"We are here for you sweetie ,please tell us what happend" Key said with that umma attitude ,lending me a hand to get up . 

"Nightmare..." i murmured,since they all know how effected i am from such things,they also know how i feel right now,and also that that single thing can ruin my day. 

"Oh.." Minho sighed and hugged me,it was silence for a couple of minutes ,then Onew clapped his hands and grinned. 

"Soooo,im sure you ll feel better after we tell you the reason why we are here..." he said and after all the 5 stunning boys were smiling at each-others. 
I looked at them in amusement .

"Our boss gave us permission to take 2 weeks of rest from our schedules ,so ,we wanted you to come with us ....and guess the place?" 

"I dont know..." 

"ITALY." Jonghyun said exited ,jumping like a little kid. 

I opened my mouth wide at his answer.
"WH-WHAT!?" their faces gazed at my reaction ,i didnt know what to do ,i mean ,im happy that ill be with them ,but ....Italy? 

"Noona are you happy or not? We need you to guide us ,you are the only one who knows italian here ,and we dont know nothing about it." Taemin pouted 

"I know they do delicious Chicken! And Spaghetti.." Onew murmured ,his love for chicken never fade,everyone started laughing

Oh who can resist then ,you know what ,let my memories go in hell,im going to Italy again ,Itll be fun! 

"I cant wait.." i said smiling .."but before i should ask permission,you know...mom..." 

"Oh sure ,dont worry im sure she wont mind ,our manager will talk with her." Minho pointed out. 

"Fine then,im going to do some hot chocolate ,talk to me from the lining room ,ill be hearing. " i said 

"Im coming with you ." Jjong wishpered in my ear ,i smiled lightly and we both lend to the kitchen. 

"When will we leave?" i asked while preparing the stove. 

"Tomorrow" he answered ,i dropped the cocolate package and turned around ,finding him with a wide grin on his puppy face. 

"SAY WHAT? But...But... i dont have time! " i said disperated.

"Oh shut up , we are here to help you babe ,now come here and give me a kiss ,i missed you." 
And as he said ,i did....

 

FAIL....PLEASE DONT KILL ME D: *run and hide in a corner*
Im sorry T.T Im just not good these days ,im sorry if i dissapointed you . T.T 
P.S:Excuse me for my typos ,ill edit this tomorrow  :/