Had it been a month? Two? Hongki had lost track of time. Lost track of days. Lost track of himself.

“What day is it?” He looked up from the bed at the nurse in his room.

She looked up at him with a sad smile for a moment before responding. “It's Tuesday, dear.”

“Oh...” He looked down at his hands, at the healed scars that covered his fingers and palms. Vicious burns that marred one hand, but not the other. He looked back up at the woman. “How long have I been here?”

“Two years, dear.” She said it almost like an apology and quickly walked out of the room, avoiding the tears that began to prick at the man’s eyes.

He blinked a few times, pushing back the tears and sniffled. “I keep forgetting that...” He muttered to himself. He shook his head, fingers threading into his hair. He tightened his grip, tugging at his hair, as if the harder he pulled the easier it would be for him to remember what he'd forgotten.

The clocked clicked and sounds leaked in from the open door. Tears leaked from his closed eyes. He rocked back and forth in the bed, his large blue scrubs falling off one of his shoulders. His stomach grumbled.

“Hyung..” A soft voice called from the doorway and Hongki looked up, wiping s eyes. There stood a young looking boy with long auburn hair. His own scrubs hung off his body and he was completely barefoot. “Do you remember me today, Hyung?”

Hongki stared at the boy for a moment, a deep blankness in his eyes as he racked his brain to try and remember who this kid was. A name came to his mind, but it wasn't one he really recognized. “Taemin?”

The smile the kid gave him in return was bright enough to bring a wave of happiness to Hongki. He looked at the boy, trying to remember more. Chewing his lip, he spoke again, hesitantly “We met in jail.”

“That’s right, Hyung.” Taemin smiled and walked over to the bed, reaching out and taking Hongki’s hand. “Come eat breakfast with me?”

Hongki nodded and pulled himself out of the bed. He shoved some socks onto his feet and walked out of his room following Taemin. The hospital wing was mostly empty. All the doors were open and the patients inside them wore the same matching scrubs.

Hongki looked into some of the rooms. One woman sat at the foot of her bed staring blankly at the wall. One man seemed to be talking to his closet door. One person hissed at him as they walked by and he sped up, keeping at Taemin’s side even closer.

They walked into the kitchen and got their food, sitting next to each other. The conversation was difficult and patched. Hongki couldn't remember a thing that the two had previously talked about in thier stay at the hospital. The Psych Ward.

Taemin frequently had to calm him down when he got angry for not remembering. Hongki had been in the facility for two years, working with the doctors to heal from his injuries and the brain damage he received from the smoke damage. Taemin had been in and out the entire time, always coming back to detox and pretend to go to rehab. This time he was being serious, though. Or so he said.

“Hongki, Taemin?” They were interrupted from their talk by a young nurse. She seemed a bit nervous. Later, Taemin would remind Hongki that she was new. “You've got visitors.”

Hongki blinked, wondering who would come visit him. He followed the nurse and Taemin, listing off the people who could come visit him. It was Tuesday, it couldn't be his daughter - she was at school. He doubted it would be Ha Yul. He couldn't remember if she had come to visit him or not, but he couldn't be sure.

Walking into the visitors room, Hongki looked around and found two familiar faces. Jaejin and Wonbin sat at a table, waiting. The two men smiled and waved. Taemin broke away from Hongki and ran, just as Wonbin stood up and jumped into his arms.

Hongki, visibly confused, walked over and sat down. He gave a short smile to Jaejin and then just looked at Taemin. It took a while for Taemin and Wonbin to finish saying their hellos and sat down. The next few minutes were spent explaining to Hongki what was going on.

“We've been together for a year and a half.” Wonbin told Hongki, a blushed painted on his face. “Do you remember that day, when I told you that I liked a guy?”

Hongki nodded. He could remember that. That was easy to remember. 

“This is the guy I meant.” Wonbin turned and tucked some of Taemin’s hair behind his ear.

“But...how?” Hongki asked.

“He works for the rehab center I went to after I ended up in jail with you that time..” Taemin explained, hiding his face in Wonbin’s shoulder. 

Wonbin smiled and ruffled Taemin’s hair. “That's why he’s in here now.”

“I want to get clean for real...for Wonbin..so we can be together.” Taemin smiled, then turned to look at Hongki. “And for myself..because I'm tired of being the way that I am.”

Hongki smiled and nodded, resting his head on the table. The group talked for some time. The two men gave the patients information on the outside world. They smiled and laughed and joked, but then the got serious.

“Hongki, there’s something you should know.” Jaejin spoke slowly. He bit his lip and looked away. After a long silence, he spoke again. “Minhwan passed away...yesterday.”

Hongki’s mouth went dry. His breath caught in his throat. “Wh..what?”

Wonbin nodded. “He was in an accident yesterday..”

“The police think he did it on purpose..” Jaejin interrupted.

“What about...him?” Hongki asked, words tripping over the name he wanted to say and finding another word instead.

Jaejin sighed, looking down at his hands. “He wasn't anywhere near the accident.”

Hongki’s relief was instant, his entire body breathing a sigh of relief. He his lips and looked at the other boys.

“When can I see him?” He asked. This phrase seemed familiar to him somehow and his smile faltered.

Jaejin and Wonbin shared a look before smiling. “The doctors say they'll let you out soon.” This wasn't quite the proper answer, but Hongki didn't press it. He allowed them to continue talking as he sat in silence, trying to recall his memories.