In Which We Were Stranger

Park Chorong

“ you, Jung Eunji!”  Bomi spat before dashed outside in heavy stomps.

I willed to run after her but Eunji held my hand, beckoning me to stay.  I was confused, but seeing Eunji with many bruises rendering me to stay with her, ushering her to the couch, and treated her wounds.

“I am really sorry, Eunji-ya…  to bring you in this situation.”  I said in guilty.

“Don’t mind it, Unnie…  It’s not your fault.  Bomi was too blind.  I could even believe she did those things to me.  I thought she was my friend, but seeing her did not trust me, and accused me, and ruined the bond we’ve made—it was really upsetting.”  Eunji murmured in pain.

“It’s obviously my fault…  To run into you…  and put you into this trouble…”  I felt really bad about what happened to Eunji.

“It’s no one fault.  It is destined to be this way…  don’t blame yourself, Unnie…”  She consoled me, but the guilt still possessed my mind.

“But still—because of me, your friendship got ruined…”  I said somberly.

“Bomi ruined it…  You’re not.”  She said.  Firm yet warm.

I was not totally okay by Eunji’s words.  She got hit, and lost her best friend—and I was the root of this problem.  I led this misunderstanding.  Eunji seemed to notice my guilty and worried face, and she kept consoling that it was not my mistake, and asking not to think about it too much.

That night, when Bomi was back from work, I directly rushed out to living room and ready to welcome Bomi with a lot of words.

“How dare you did that to her, Yoon Bomi!”  I snapped.

“What did I do?”  She put her annoying face.

“I am asking why did you hit her?”  I tried hard not to slap her face.

“She deserved to it.  She knows that I love you, why is she still trying to approach you!”  She retorted.

“She did nothing!  And she is not approaching me!”

“She is trying!”

“I thought you love your friend, how could you—”

“I don’t need a friend like her!  I caught you in her place, wore her clothes, and I believed you two had slept together—and I don’t know how many times you two probably do it as you really defended her a lot.”

“She admires you a lot, and always says good things about you…  How could you say such things!  And you believe in wrong thing, Yoon Bomi.”

“I did it because I love you…  I don’t want anyone to take you away from me…”

“Why didn’t you do it when I was still with you—instead of hanging out with bunch of girls, and barely spending good time with me.  No one take me away from you, Yoon Bomi.  It’s you who make me leave.”

“I know I made a mistake.  I want you to give me a chance.”

“I already gave you many chances, but you always missed it.  Now, I want you to accept the fact that I am not belong to you anymore.”

I was glaring at her in piercing gaze.  I should hate her for being this way, but uttering such harsh words still got me hurt, and I barely could not hold the unbearable pain which hitting my whole body so badly.

“Let’s not draw another people inside our matter.  The problem is only between you and I.”  I added in clenched teeth.

“Okay, I got it.  The problem is actually your complaint over my social life, and my easy-going personality.  If only you’re not trying to destroy my true self, we would be fine—even until now.”  She put her hands on my shoulder, looking at me in convincing eyes.

“The fault is not your personality—it’s your attitude which mattered.  I would be okay if you could manage your time between your social life and me.  I never been your priority, Yoon Bomi…  You need to grow up, you need to be ready to love someone…”  I rattled desperately.

“I think I was doing good.  You’re just being too much.  You hate my extrovert trait, because you’re a loner—and it’s your problem.”  She pronounced problem in a firm and irritating way.

Her words jabbed me right in my heart.  Hurt and painful.  I got teary, and stunned.  And she looked like she was regretting her words.  Her hands made her way upward, cupping both of my cheeks, but I fobbed her hands off.  Letting her startled.

“I know I am a loner, who completely got fooled by your tentative affection.  I better alone than meet a person who is really disrespectful and cannot keep a promise like you.  Although we’re living under one roof, I will pretend that you’re invisible.  And I hope you’ll do the same thing, Yoon Bomi.”

I strode over her and stomped my feet toward my room.  Slumping down behind the door as unbearable pain weighed a lot and brought me down to powerlessly.  I cried silently.  The excitement—the expectation—led me into this suffering which I could not know when it would be over.  I honestly hated to let Bomi go.  She was the first person who let my heart opened though I finally realized that it was a big failure.  I was falling for her—but I knew I did not love her, and she me.

***

Everything was back to normal.  Like when we barely knew each other—like when we did not talk to each other—like when we completely stranger.  It was hurt as for months we already grown closer, like more than just friend—but now, we’re in the state in which we’re walked further to different destination, and would never bumped into each other.

Bomi was annoying as usual, but it was worse.  She looked like doing it purposely, and I tried to ignore it completely.  Pretending like I was not affected by her irritating attitude although I frankly always cursed inside my room.

That night, I was back from yoga class when I found a mess right at the terrace.  The shoes, as well as the boxes were scattered anywhere, blocking the way to enter the next room.  I trotted inside, and searched the one who obviously made this mess.

“Yoon Bomi!  What the hell are you doing at the terrace!”  I spat, looking at her fiercely.

“Terrace?  I am not doing anything.”  She answered lightly, then turned her eyes back to television.

“What did you do with those shoes!  I am asking you!”  I raised my voice.

“Shoes?  Aaaaa…  I was looking for my old sneakers…”  She raised her eyebrow mischievously.

“And you don’t clear the mess?”  I said wryly.

“What mess?  I am just looking for my sneakers.”  She shrugged, watching me annoyingly from her couch.

“Put those shoes and boxes back when I am still asking you kindly.”  I stated.

“Sirheo.”  She stuck her tongue out, getting up from her couch.

“Yoon Bomi!  Clean those up before I—”

“Before you what?”

She interjected, walking closer to me while I kept retreating.

“Wha…  What are you doing, Yoon Bomi…”  I stuttered as my back already collided into the wall behind.

“What are you expecting?”  She lowered her voice, looking at me in lustful eyes.

“Go away, Yoon Bomi!”  I said firmly.

She put her hands beside my ears, trapping me between, and I was frightened as she might do something rude like before—when she kissed me hungrily, without feeling or love.

“You’ll get your third slap if you do something to me…”  I threatened.

“So, you are expecting me to do something to you?”  She chuckled, and put down her hands, releasing the trap between me.

“I am not!”  I snarled.

She looked down to my eyes.  Her gaze turned softer, like she was keeping a longing feel inside.

“Clean up you mess now!”  I growled and walked away.

“I am pretending that I am living alone.  That’s what you want.”  She defended.

“It doesn’t mean that you can make junkyard anywhere!”  I turned around, and surprised that she actually standing closer to me, and our lips was inch apart as we faced each other.

“Clean it up now, Yoon Bomi.”  I looked down, hiding my red face as I was fluttered for being so close to her.

I did not wait her respond, and turned my heel to go to my room, calming down the pounding heart which slightly tasting back the throb sensation when we were attracted to each other.  To be frank, I missed that feeling, and wanted to back to those days, but my sense kept saying not to make the same mistake—not to take a clumsy step—and to calculate every move I would make.

The next day, I was sitting at the corner of cafeteria of campus during the break time.  The chattering of others group did not distract me at all as I was immersed into my book while listening music through my earphone.  I did not pay attention on surrounding, not even to the group who just showing up and taking seat beside me.  They were really noisy although I completely shut my ears.

I was slightly jerked and curiously took a glance on the group beside me as I heard the familiar husky voice uttering some words.  And it was true.  It was Bomi and her friends which I just had seen today—another group of kitten.

They were chatting and joking happily and loudly, rendering me to hardly concentrate to my book.  I was okay when the other group talking about stupid random things, but without I even realized, Bomi’s conversation with her friends was successfully giving me an irritating audio.

I could bear it anymore when their loud laughter burst out and almost gave me a heart attack.  They were laughing like they own the whole world—like nobody was around them.  I slammed my palm on the table, Bomi and the group, and the other students at the table nearby was surprised and looked at my direction in questioning looks.  For the next second, I was regretting my attitude as many eyes staring at me like they thinking that I was insane, and the next thing which happened was my past memories was playing like a movie.  The scene of me being too exaggerated and losing control slowly made me nervous.  I slammed my eyes close, and left my seat when I got better enough.

I walked hastily toward the exit, and bumped into someone.  I quickly said sorry without looking at him or her before running out aimlessly.

“Unnie…”

I jerked as someone suddenly grabbed my hand.

“Eunji?”  I was a bit shocked.

“You bumped into me again…”  She chuckled.

“It was you?”  I opened my mouth in agape.

“Hahaha—Yeah…  What a coincidence.”  She let out soft laughter.

“I am sorry to bum