TITLE  (003/005)

The title gives readers a sense of tragedy, which will foreshadow fute events. It goes well with the story, the way she was actually depressed without Jongin.

DESCRIPTION/FOREWORD  (007/010)

The description was really short, yet it summarized their backstory as far as it goes.

For the quote, I woud prefer using correct grammer, but this does not matter that much since it's a quote, and quotes are said by people(who do not always use proper grammar most times).

CHARACTERIZATION  (014/020)
 

I get really disturbed by almost every character(not nessasarily a bad thing).

Myunghee acts like she really loves Jongin, but ends up blaming everything on him. In her letter, it reveals most about her personality. Over and over - in the letter - she said how he hurt her, he broke her etc. This isn't a very good word to describe her character but..butthurt? I don't know, I'm sorry xD. She is too dependent on him, and I think it's just that, not really love. If she truly loves him, then why is she making him feel bad and guilty? Also, she seems very deperate for him. It's painful to see how hopeless it was when Myunghee was doing her best to get him back all in vain. In my opinion, that was the best part how you truly show her character in critical mental experience.

For Jongin, I really do not know why he cheated on her. Everything has a motive, and if he loves her, yet betrays her trust because the excuse of "I don't know," that isn't true love. Also, it's unrealistic the way you say he just takes a girl to her house and address her wound, not to mention she's a total stranger. 

About Kyungsoo, even though he is a side character, I really like his little yet effective talks with Jongin. Even though this may not be much about his character, it tells Jongin's true feelings. 

Another side character is Myunghee's mother. I don't really understand her. Why does she kick her own daughter away, and if she really cares, then she really would not have done that. It seems as though she cares more about her husband then her own flesh and blood. And if she was mourning about her husband's death, then what does it mean by "my stepdad filed a divorce file"? Does that mean her mother had another man?

I really like the way you describe your characters, it makes the story fantastic really.

PLOT  (014/020)
 

In the beginning,  thought it was a little out of the ordinary to bring a random person in to their house, as much as it is weird that you would tell someone your address. The overall idea/outline of this story was nice, as in the skeleton of the fic. I just don't  like the flesh and skin over it.

Further explanation: I like the idea of a guy helping a girl self harm, but ends up betraying her trust. I dislike how he found her, and how she died in the end when she allegedly have no one with her. It's not a bad idea, but rather, not really practical to real life. Also, the illness. It was very vague and you should have at least make up what she(the mother) has, whether it is a real disease/condition, or something made up(like Hanahaki Disease).It would have pulled the story together more. 

Plothole: The other girl. Did she leave Jongin? DId she find out? You never mentioned this in the story. 

WRITING STYLE (015/020)

The pace was very great. It was neither quick nor slow, and perfect to read. I like the way you write how readers can visualize almost everything. There were not many specific things you said, but I can still see what is going on, in my mind. I really like this angst and it was a good story to read with the emotion grabbing scenes.